“What? Why?”
But he was already gone, disappearing in a cloud of smoke that soon became invisible. She felt him tickle her skin, blanket her with a sense of pricklies, swirling around her legs, trying to get past her shields.
She shivered at the feeling of evil pressing at her, trying to get inside her. He felt like a true predator who killed for the sake of killing, who gloried in the act of death itself. Kind of like the wraith, actually.
He was like a different guy when he was in shadow form. This man would so kill her without blinking an eye. If he hadn’t collapsed a minute ago, they might even be engaged in a battle to the death right now. If she’d been forced to kill him . . . it might have put her over the top. Why had he done that? Why had he been trying to pick a fight with her?
And she was supposed to let him inside her? Where he could reach her heart? When he was in his oh-so-evil state? Would he be able to resist the temptation?
The pressure intensified on the surface of her skin, and she felt like peeling it off her. Her wraith circled inside her, awakened by his darkness, prowling for prey, but there wasn’t a single living thing in the church for her to kill, so Paige ignored it.
“Where he’d go?”
Paige whirled around to see the church lady standing in the doorway clutching one of those one-pound Hershey bars, and suddenly Paige felt like there was a flashing neon arrow pointing to her. Kill this woman. She clenched her fists and willed herself not to sprint after the woman and tackle her to the floor in a deadly skirmish. “He’s, um, in the bathroom. He’s waiting for you.”
She brightened. “Really? I’ll go take this to him.” She spun and her heels clicked quickly down the hall.
Paige took a deep breath and shuddered at the burning urge to go after the woman. She didn’t know which was more dangerous: staying in the church with her hungry wraith and the juicy meal the church lady would make, or letting Jed into her body. He could kill her in an instant . . . but she would kill that woman if she stayed here.
She had to trust him. He’d told her he loved her, for hell’s sake. Yeah, he’d been possessed, but still. It was a statement of faith and she was going to hold onto it. “Okay, Jed, but if you kill me, I will be severely pissed.” She shook out her shoulders, flexed her fingers, and then dropped her shields.
His invasion was instant, flooding her body with a coldness that had her staggering. Her inner wraith pulsed with recognition and swarmed over to him, welcoming a kindred spirit into her soul. Then something caught inside her and pain shot through her, and she realized something was dangerously wrong. The wraith was coming alive, really and truly alive. But how? She hadn’t killed anyone.
“Jed!” But she knew he wouldn’t hear her, wouldn’t let her go until they were through the portal, and he left her body. Her body trembling with the effort of containing the wraith, she hoisted herself up on the window ledge and let herself fall into the stained glass.
Fourteen
Paige landed with a thud on a patch of grass, slamming her head on a rock, the impact reverberating through her brain and shattering the last vestiges of her control over the wraith.
Then there was a shriek from inside her that had her slamming her hands over her ears. Her muscles convulsed and pain stabbed her as the wraith swelled with power and attacked Jed’s shadow form inside Paige’s body.
She screamed as Jed fought off the wraith, searing pain knifing through her as he battled for his freedom, as the wraith sank its claws into him to keep him from leaving her body.
Then there was a tear that felt like her soul had been cleaved in half and Jed ripped free and shot out of her. The wraith screeched in protest and spewed through Paige’s body, trying to get out to follow him.
Paige curled into a ball, the pain and fury rising to a crescendo she couldn’t stand until she thought she was going to be ripped apart from the pain, from the torture, from the rage—
“Paige!” Jed grabbed her shoulders and jerked her upright. “Come back to me!”
“How? Oh, God!” Her body convulsed again and tears streamed down her cheeks. “Tell me what to do!”
He cursed and then yanked her against him and slammed his mouth down on hers. Desire exploded in her and she threw her arms around his neck, attacking his kisses with all the dark energy consuming her. His mouth was hot, his tongue demanding, everything she wanted, everything she needed.
She fell onto his chest, her breasts flattened against him, heat pulsing through her at the feel of his body against hers, at his fingers sinking into her butt and hauling her against his hardness. Her mouth was desperate for his, and he met her with everything he had, teasing, caressing, thrusting, penetrating, until her body coiled up with a need and a desire so tight and so hot she felt like her body was going to snap.
Then he broke the kiss and stared down at her. “Better?”
She blinked at his abruptness. “What? Why’d you stop?”
“The wraith. It settled?”
She stared at him, trying to process the question while the desire still surged through her. All she could think about were his hands on her butt, the taste of his mouth—
“The wraith, Paige.”
She finally understood what he was talking about, and she realized the wraith had indeed gone back into hibernation. “Yeah, it calmed down.” She groaned, remembering what had happened, and rolled off him to flop on her back, resting her forearm over her eyes as she waited for her body to regain its strength. “What happened?”
“It fed on me.” He set his hand on her belly. “You okay?”
“Ducky. Why did it feed on you?”
He was silent for a moment, and she moved her arm to look at him. His violet eyes flicked to hers. “When a shadow warrior kills outside the line of duty, a piece of the soul he’s killed stays with him. Sort of a punishment for abusing our powers, I guess.”
She lifted her still-trembling hand to his chest.
“What are you doing?”
“I can feel souls. It’s a Rivka thing.” She frowned as she felt the familiar pulse of souls in his body. Not just his soul, but others. Thousands of them. They felt different, though. Incomplete. “Everyone you’ve ever killed is still in you?”
“Not their whole soul.”
She focused deeper, trying to untangle the web of souls in his body, and then she knew. She jerked her hand off him. “You captured their death. That’s what’s in you. The death of every being you’ve killed.”
He nodded. “The wraith found them and was feeding on them.” He grimaced and stroked her hair. “I have a bad feeling we just did some serious damage to your life expectancy. The wraith is going to be a hell of a lot stronger when it wakes up.”
“Well, that sucks.” She checked on the wraith again, and it was settled deep. Digesting all the deaths it had just eaten? Disgusting thought. With any luck, it would take weeks to digest such a huge meal. Or, it would wake up in an hour, so powerful that Paige would have no chance to resist it.
Ah, yes, time to stop that depressing train of thought. “So, why’d kissing me stop it?”
He shrugged. “It wasn’t trying to get you to kill or anything. It was simply in a feeding frenzy, so I tried to distract it.” His gaze settled on hers. “Your desire was so powerful that it worked.”
“Yeah, well, good thing I have the hots for you, apparently.” She sighed as she felt the strength beginning to return to her body, but she didn’t move, for fear of dislodging Jed’s hand from her stomach. “So, how come it doesn’t try to eat all your little death friends other times? Like now?”
“Because they’re deep inside my soul. Merely touching you doesn’t merge our souls.” His gaze flicked to her mouth. “Even a kiss doesn’t. We’re still separate. But when I went shadow inside you, I became a part of you. A complete merge. We can’t do that again. It’s much too dangerous.”
“Wow.” She set her hand on his and tangled her fingers with his. “So, um, what about sex? Wo
uld that merge our souls?”
“Depends.”
“On what?”
His eyes got dark. “On whether it was strictly physical.”
She caught her breath at the intensity on his face. “And would it be?”
“Could go either way at this point.” He slid his free hand around to her hair, then bent down and kissed her.
It was a soft kiss, a kiss that said he was glad she was okay, a kiss that made her toes curl and her belly get all warm and fuzzy. She sighed when he stopped kissing her. “Can I just tell you how much I dig your kisses? They are awesome. And not just because your kiss just saved my life.” She touched his lips. “There’s just something about being kissed by you that makes me happy.”
He got a tortured look on his face and he cursed.
Before she could ask what was wrong, he pulled her into his arms, held her against his chest, and pressed his face into the crook of her neck. She slid her arms around his neck and held him, sensing his need to simply be held. It was a need she understood.
Finally, he lifted his head and looked at her. “You make what should be a simple decision incredibly difficult.”
She frowned. “You do realize I can do nothing with a statement as vague and elusive as that, don’t you? What are you talking about?”
“Come on.” His voice was gruff again. “Let’s go.” He stood up, grabbed her, and pulled her to her feet.
He didn’t let go of her hand as he headed across the wooded area they’d apparently landed in—she’d been too distracted until now to notice where they were—and emerged onto a neglected lawn that seemed to be as welcoming to dandelions and weeds as it was to grass.
She was just about to explain to him the importance of sharing in order to heal emotionally, when she caught sight of the small house they were walking toward. Broken windows, no back door, siding missing from the house, and a huge pile of garbage in the middle of the back deck. “What is this place?”
“It’s Rafi’s house.” He broke into a run, and Paige sprinted after him, Jed’s terror making her heart thud.
“Rafi!” Jed sprinted for the house, fear for his brother stabbing deep in his chest. What the hell had happened? “Rafi!”
He grabbed the railing and vaulted up the steps, then caught his foot and pitched forward. He threw his arms up to block his fall, then grunted as something slammed into his side and blistering pain shot through him. He fell to the deck and rolled, clutching his side as he gasped in agony.
“Holy crap!” Paige landed beside him. “Are you okay?”
He gritted his teeth and felt his side. It was sticky and warm, and he could feel something lodged beneath his ribs. “Damn, that hurts.”
“Yeah, I bet it does.” Paige bent over him, biting her lower lip. “Um, how immortal are you?”
“This is nothing,” he gritted out, trying to get a grip on whatever was sticking out of him, but his hands kept slipping in the blood. His palm hit the object and he cursed again, sucking in his breath against the pain.
She let out a breath of relief. “That’s great news. Hang tight.” She set her hand on his hip, and then yanked.
Pain ricocheted through him as Paige tossed a bloody fireplace poker onto the deck in front of him. “What the hell’s that?” he asked.
“Homemade booby trap, apparently. Nice brother you have.” She stripped off her shirt, wadded it up, and pressed it to his side. “Hold that on there. You’re gushing.”
Holding her shirt against his injury, he rolled to his side and willed himself to his knees, blinking when he realized she was wearing nothing but a black lace bra. She filled it out perfectly and his body surged in response. What the hell was wrong with him? He was gushing blood and she could still turn him on?
She raised her brows. “Want me to take it off so you can get a better view?”
He grimaced and rolled to his feet. “No.”
“Liar.” She hummed as she stood up. “Is that your brother?”
Jed turned to where she was looking and his gut froze. Rafi was sprawled on the deck, his skin shredded, his body quivering. “Rafi!”
Fifteen
Nearly forty-five minutes later, wearing one of Rafi’s shirts that she’d filched from his dresser, Paige paused in the the bedroom doorway, watching Jed lean on the footboard of Rafi’s bed. He was intently watching the rise and fall of Rafi’s chest. Every time Rafi breathed in, Jed relaxed slightly, and then he’d tense again until the next breath.
Her chest ached as she watched them together. I want that. I want someone to love me like that.
She walked up behind Jed and slipped her arms around his waist, careful not to brush against his bandaged side. He stiffened as she rested her cheek against his arm. “How’s he doing?”
“He seems to be stabilized. He’s not as cold as he was, now that we’ve got him under a bunch of blankets.” Sweat was beaded on Jed’s brow.
“Should we call a doctor? Or a healer?”
Jed shook his head. “It wouldn’t help. He’s dying because a shadow warrior is trying to tap him. I was on my way to visit the shadow warrior this morning to ask him to back off when Junior intercepted us and said he’d recalled Rafi.” He grimaced. “The torture in addition to the shadow warrior is too much stress. Look at him. He’s dying.”
She tightened her arms around him at the grief in his voice. “Well, he’s not dead yet, is he? We’ll go find the shadow warrior and whip him into shape, and then—”
Jed shoved off the bed and turned to face her. “And then I have to keep him out of Junior’s torture chamber.”
She frowned. “Why do I get the feeling that’s a problem for me?”
“In the cab, Junior told me that I had to convert you to wraith within two days, and make sure you fall in love with me first to ensure your loyalty to Satan Jr. through me. I have two days to do it, or Rafi goes back to Junior’s hell.” He ran his hands through his hair, his torment evident in his beautiful eyes.
“So what? That’s what I told you to tell him in the first place.”
Jed glanced at his brother. “But if I don’t turn you, Rafi’s dead.” He cursed and looked back at her, and the pain in his eyes tugged at her heart. “Paige, he’s making me choose between the two of you—”
She put her hand on his chest. “Hey, it’s okay. I’d never expect my needs to trump your brother’s.” She forced a smile. “Why would you have loyalty to me? You just met me, and well, I’m not exactly swimming in admirers at the moment.”
He frowned and didn’t seem relieved by the fact she’d just given him permission to be a good brother. “I don’t want to turn you, Paige, but . . .” He glanced back at Rafi. “Even his being stuck here is better than being truly dead. I can’t let him die, especially not at Junior’s hands.”
The intensity on his face made her stomach tighten, and she was suddenly filled with such longing to belong. To be loved. To love. “You never loved me, right? Even though you brought it up before?” Even though she knew the answer, she had to know.
He met her gaze. “Yes. I’m sorry for misleading you. I didn’t want to . . . I just didn’t know what else to do. I guess I was testing to see if I could do it. When you started asking me all those questions about Rafi in the church, I kind of lost it.”
She sighed, refusing to acknowledge the disappointment in her belly. “Yeah, well, it’s fine. I figured as much.” She looked at him. “But what next? It’s not like I’m going to fall for your nefarious plans now that you’ve confessed them.”
“I don’t know.” He turned back toward Rafi and gripped the footboard again. “Since he’s already died once and is in the Afterlife, if he dies again, he’ll truly be dead. It might be selfish, but I’m not ready to let him go, even if it would mean Junior could never get him. That just seems like a cheater’s way out, to just let him die.”
The frustration in his voice, the tearing of his heart . . . her throat tightened. “Seeing how much pain you’re in becau
se of Rafi’s pain . . . it’s so amazing to see.” She put her hand on her heart. “That’s what living is all about, you know? That kind of pain is why we’re alive, because that means we love, like truly love, you know?”
“The pain sucks.”
“But in a good way.” She leaned forward to look at Rafi. “You try to be this cold and detached assassin, you know? If you didn’t have Rafi, by now you’d just be an empty shell of a man. But with him in your life, you feel pain and you’re alive. I think it’s beautiful.”
“Beautiful? Pain is beautiful?”
“Well, of course.” She sat on the bed next to Rafi, watching the rise and fall of his chest, the faded pallor of his skin, the gashes on his skin. “What’s the alternative? Total emotional isolation? That sucks. Trust me, I know.” She bit her lower lip to keep her eyes from getting misty. “Pain is good, because without it, you won’t even notice the happiness.”
Jed didn’t reply, so Paige turned her head to look at him.
He was staring at her with a stunned look.
“What?”
“You did it again.”
“Did what?”
He sat down next to her and picked up her hand in his. “You took everything crappy about my life, and made it sound like it was good.”
“Well, it is. Even if Rafi dies, it’s still good.”
He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her against his chest so he could kiss the top of her head. “You amaze me.”
“Because I’m insane?”
“Because you’re sunshine.”
She frowned. “Actually, I’m pretty evil at this point. About eighty percent wraith, one percent virgin, and the rest is all big, bad Rivka.”
Jed shook his head, and touched her chest, over her heart. “In here is where it matters. You could kill a thousand people and have sex with Satan himself and you’d still have this innocence about you that draws people to your spirit.” He pressed his palm more firmly, as if he were trying to tap into the light he’d claimed was there. “I want to lose myself in you so badly I can’t think straight half the time.”
Sex & The Immortal Bad Boy Page 10
