With the back of her hand she swiped at a tear that inched its way down her cheek. “I know, Daddy, but my heart tells me this is the right thing to do,” she whispered as she straightened up and headed on to the living room.
“Hey, Sis.” Jace motioned her over to the sofa. “We’re tellin’ Christmas stories. Remember that year when Mama and Daddy had a few friends over for a big people?” He made air quotes around the last two words. “Me and Brody went out runnin’ around. Brody was sixteen and I was fourteen, but I got to go with him. Mainly because Mama wanted him to stay away from Lila and I was supposed to tattle, but there wasn’t no way I was tellin’ on them because Brody would have made me stay home.”
Kasey put her fingers over her lips. “Shhh! I’ve got three kids who do not need to hear that story, and besides, I had to stay in my room, remember. I was supposed to get to go to Granny Hope’s house, but she and Gramps came over here for the party.”
“I’ll tell it,” Brody said. “She was mad because we got to leave in my old truck and she had to stay home.”
“She could have stayed with her best friend that night, but she’d gotten into trouble for sassin’ Mama,” Jace said.
“And.” Brody lowered his voice.
“And what?” Nash’s eyes lit up.
“She watched Mama pour a little rum into the eggnog and a touch of vodka into the punch,” Brody said.
“Just enough to give it a little kick.” Hope chuckled.
“Is that all?” Lila asked.
“No, it’s not,” Hope said. “I was here helping Valerie, and when we weren’t lookin’, Kasey snuck into the liquor cabinet, and let’s just say the eggnog and the punch ended up having a lot of kick. And I had the first and only hangover in my life the next morning.”
Nash caught Kasey’s gaze across the room. “Did you get in trouble?”
She settled down on the sofa between Hope and Jace. “Trouble doesn’t begin to cover it. I got grounded for a month and had to help these two old worthless brothers do chores the whole Christmas vacation and the worst part of the whole thing was…”
“And that wasn’t nearly enough punishment. I was so embarrassed,” Valerie said as she and Gracie entered the room and sat down in a couple of rocking chairs.
“There’s good and bad in everything.” Kasey turned her gaze toward her mother. “Sometimes we’d hurry through chores and go over to Henry’s old barn in the evening. It was while I was grounded that Adam and I started dating and I got my first kiss.”
“Sweet Jesus!” Valerie threw her hand over her eyes. “Just remember you got a little red-haired daughter that already acts just like you, and you will have to pay for your raisin’.”
“Lookin’ forward to it,” Kasey said.
“When she’s twelve, I’ll help you put locks on the liquor cabinet.” Hope smiled.
“Thanks, Granny Hope.”
At least part of her family trusted her to make her own decisions and to support her—Granny Hope, Jace, and Lila. She didn’t worry about her grandmother or her brother. They could take the heat, but Kasey hoped that Lila didn’t catch a lot of flack from Brody for her choice. She sure didn’t want to be the reason they fought so soon after their honeymoon.
“Maybe Emma will have more of her father’s stable genes,” Gracie said.
Kasey just smiled and nodded. Gracie didn’t need to know that it was a pure miracle that she and Adam weren’t pregnant long before the wedding day or that he did love a good party. Silas was the proof of that, since she’d gotten pregnant with him after a big fall social at the base when they were both too plastered to remember to use protection.
“I’d tell y’all a story about Brody and Lila, but it’s classified.” Jace laughed.
That last word caused a veil to fall over Nash’s eyes and Kasey felt an immediate need to get him back to his ranch. She faked a yawn and said, “Y’all had better hold the good stories until Christmas day because I sure don’t want to miss a thing, since this is my first Christmas back here in Happy. But right now it’s time for kids’ baths and bedtime stories and it’s past time to get the chores done on Texas Star.”
Lila popped up off Brody’s lap. “I’ll help get their coats and hats on.”
“Me!” Emma tucked her hand into Lila’s. “You gets to help me.”
“I can do my own,” Rustin declared.
“That leaves me and you, buddy.” Nash carried Silas toward the coatrack. “It’s been real nice to be a part of everything tonight, folks. Thanks for a great evening.”
“Holler if you need any help with anything. We’re just across the fence, and you can throw Kasey back over it if she gets too sassy,” Jace said.
“Thank you.” Nash nodded. “I’ll have to be nice to her or I’ll be runnin’ the cowboy boot express every single time I want to go to town for anything.” He held up his foot to show them a rugged cowboy boot. “The doctor says that I can’t drive for three weeks.”
“I feel for you.” Jace shook his head in mock worry. “Livin’ with her ain’t easy.”
“They are not livin’ together,” Gracie said curtly. “They are simply sharing a house until his doctor visit.”
“Until Christmas,” Rustin piped up and stared right at Valerie.
“We’ll see,” Valerie said.
Lila got Emma’s coat fastened and whispered in Kasey’s ear, “Ignore her. She’ll get over herself.”
“See y’all later. It’s been fun,” Kasey called out as she helped Nash get Silas into his coat and stocking hat and escaped out the door with Emma’s hand in hers. Rustin ran on ahead to the van, with Hero right behind him. When he opened the door, the dog jumped inside.
“Let the dog go with us,” Nash said softly. “He’ll be fine at the house. Tomorrow I’ll throw together a doghouse for him. Tonight he can sleep on the porch.”
Kasey didn’t argue. The crazy dog would be running back and forth between ranches anyway if she left him behind. To have a warm doghouse might be the best thing for him. She crawled inside the backseat of the van and was busy strapping Emma into her car seat while Nash worked at getting Silas all settled into his. In that tight space, his arm was against her thigh and turned her into butterfingers and a bundle of tightly wound nerves.
“There we go, Mr. Silas.” Nash finally moved back.
“Tank you, Nashie.” Silas grinned.
“So I’m his Nashie and Emma’s tall cowboy?” Nash said.
“Looks that way.”
“You’re my buddy that I get to spend Christmas with this year,” Rustin said. “Will you come to my school party with Mama?”
“Maybe.” Nash glanced over at Kasey. “You think after tonight that they’ll even want me to be a shepherd in the church thing?”
“Granny Hope runs that show with an iron fist, and she’s already got you on the roster.”
“What about your mama and Gracie?”
She fastened her seat belt. “They’re in charge of the Santa end of the thing in the reception hall. You probably won’t be asked to be Santa, but then you don’t look much like one to me.”
He pulled his belt across his wide chest and locked it. “So you’re saying I’d look better in a burlap getup as a shepherd than in a red suit as Santa?”
“Exactly,” she said. “But you can still wear your cowboy boots. It’ll probably be cold.”
“Kasey, I don’t want to cause a problem—” he started.
“If you do, that’s their burden, not ours,” she answered quickly.
* * *
Nash’s bare feet didn’t make the same noise that boots would have, but every other step squeaked when he stepped on it that evening on his way up to the second floor. “Do I hear kids up here?” he called out.
Emma squealed. “In Mama’s room.”
He stopped at the open door and leaned on the frame, not wanting to presume too much and go inside her bedroom without an invitation. The scene in front of him could have easily been o
ne of those Christmas pictures that folks sent out during the holidays. Kasey was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the bed with Silas in her lap and the other two kids snuggled up against either side of her. They had damp hair from their baths and were wearing pajamas, and their little faces were clear of all the chocolate they’d gotten on them at Valerie’s house. But it was Kasey who made his whole body ache with desire. Her faded T-shirt that was at least two sizes too big and her red plaid pajama pants were rolled up at the hems. Her red hair hung in ringlets, and the overhead light made every cute little freckle shine.
“Come on in; we’re just reading the third bedtime story,” Kasey said.
“I want to go to my room now,” Emma said. “Nash can read me a story.”
“Me, too.” Silas crawled off the side of the bed and would have fallen if Nash hadn’t gotten to him in time.
“No! He’s my cowboy,” Emma protested.
“Mine!” Silas yelled.
“Ladies first, boys. That’s the cowboy way. I’ll read a book to Emma and then come right over to your room and read one to you,” Nash said.
“Yay!” Emma bounced off the bed and ran across the hallway to her bedroom. She grabbed a book from the nightstand, crawled up into the middle of her bed, and held it out to Nash. He handed Silas off to Kasey and wasn’t even surprised at the flutter in his heart when their hands touched. Just because he had a clear mind didn’t change the fact that she was one gorgeous woman or that she appealed to him in every way imaginable.
“Oh, no, young lady, it’s well past your bedtime. You get under the covers with your head on the pillow.” Kasey used her free arm to drag a wooden rocking chair up beside the bed. “Nash will sit right here, and when he’s finished with your book, I will tuck you in and turn out the light.”
“Not all of the lights?” Emma asked.
“I’ll leave a night-light on in the hallway and your door open just a little.”
Emma shimmied under the covers, plopped her head back on the pillow, and nodded toward Nash. “I know if you don’t say the words.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Nash said.
It had been years since he’d read out loud to a child. The last time had been when he was about fourteen and one of the younger Lamont cousins hadn’t felt well at a family reunion. He’d been sent to the living room to rest on the sofa and Nash had felt sorry for him.
“Once upon a time,” he started the Cinderella story.
“I love this story.” Emma sighed.
Kasey turned around at the door. “You know the rules. No talkin’ while the story is bein’ read.”
“Shhh. Don’t tell him that,” Emma fussed.
“Don’t you shush me and rules are rules, young lady.”
“Okay, we’ll start all over and you shut your eyes and imagine a land far away where princesses and princes lived.” Nash began to read to her.
A little quiver in his heart said that Kasey was behind him before he finished the story. The moment that he said “the end,” she slipped into the room and tucked the covers up around Emma’s little round face.
He wanted so badly to follow her lead and kiss the child on the forehead but figured he’d best not press his luck. Both boys were already under the covers and waiting when he arrived in their bedroom. Rustin handed him a book about a cowboy and a dog named Boomer. It was a cute little story about how Boomer saved the day when the little cowboy fell off the fence and the dog went for help.
“I hope that Hero grows up to be as smart as Boomer,” Rustin said when Nash reached the end.
“And I hope you have a good night’s sleep in this new place.” Kasey crossed the room and tucked both Silas, who was already sleeping in his crib, and Rustin in for the night. “There’s a night-light on and I’m right across the hallway if you need me.”
“Where are you?” Rustin looked at Nash.
“Downstairs in the bedroom off the foyer,” Nash told him. “Doors are locked. Hero has a blanket on the porch, and he’s protecting the ranch. But if you get scared, I’m not that far away.”
“I’m a big boy. I don’t get scared,” Rustin said. “But you will leave the door open just a little, right, Mama, because Silas might get afraid if he wakes up.”
“Of course I will,” Kasey answered. “Good night, son.”
“Night, Mama and Nash.”
They left the room together and Nash started down the stairs with Kasey right behind him. “I didn’t eat much at either place, but I’m hungry now. How about a grilled cheese sandwich and some tomato soup? I make a mean soup right out of the can,” she said.
“Sounds great,” he said, glad that she hadn’t gone right to her room. The evenings were so long in the big old rambling house when he had to spend them alone.
“What’s your secret with canned soup?” he asked.
“A dash of Worchestershire sauce, a drop of hot sauce, and a little garlic powder,” she answered as she opened the refrigerator and took the cheese out.
He went to the pantry and brought out the bread and a can of soup.
They worked together to get it all ready and then sat down at the table. Maybe it should have been awkward, but it felt pretty good to have someone there with him.
“So tell me about yourself,” Kasey said. “Now that your mind is clear.”
“What do you want to know?”
“Were you ever married?”
“Almost,” he answered. “Damn fine soup. Restaurant quality.”
“Thank you. What do you mean almost?”
“I was engaged when I got the first concussion. It was a lot worse than this last one. I was in the army hospital for almost a month and then they discharged me on a medical release. I threw a fit and said I didn’t want to leave. The army was my life and I loved serving. They placated me by saying I could come back if I ever got a certified VA doctor to say I was okay. But after two years, I know it’s one of those catch-22’s.”
“And that is?”
“I’m probably never going to be cleared and I’m accepting it a little at a time.” He bit into the cheese sandwich. “What’s under that wrapped-up plate?”
“Granny tucked a plate of cookies in my tote bag,” she answered. “And if they never let you go reenlist, what then?”
“Then I’ll learn to be content right here,” he answered.
She snapped her fingers in the air. “Just like that?”
“You do what you got to do when you don’t have a choice,” he said seriously.
“What was she like?” Kasey caught his gaze across the table.
“Who?” The whole world condensed into two people having a late-night supper and he couldn’t remember what they’d even been talking about.
“The woman you almost married.”
A picture of Scarlett Rose, with her beautiful long blond hair and dark brown eyes, filled his head. She cried when she came to the hospital and he had no idea who she was or why he’d call her Kasey, and she never came back. Her mother visited a week later to return the ring and to tell him that Scarlett Rose had moved from Louisiana to Maine.
“I’m ashamed of you, Nash,” his mother had scolded when she walked into his hospital room that day.
“What are you talking about?” he’d asked.
“You’ve been cheating on her with some woman named Kasey and it has broken Scarlett’s heart. She told me she’d broken up with you and she’s given me the ring to give back to you.”
When he’d gotten well, Nash called Scarlett to explain as much as he could. Kasey was the wife of one of his team members and he felt responsible for the man’s death, so evidently he’d been trying to find her and apologize. But Scarlett didn’t believe him and said that she didn’t want him calling anymore.
“Well?” Kasey asked.
“I’m sorry. I was wool gathering. Her name was Scarlett and we’d dated for a couple of years. I asked her to marry me right before that last mission, and when I didn’t come home a whole man, she ga
ve back the ring and moved on. Literally, to Maine. Mama said that she married a guy from up there last Christmas.”
“Well, that had to have been painful,” Kasey said.
“Not so much as you’d think. I’m not sure I ever loved her like I should. I wanted a family and it was time to settle down and think about one,” he said.
Like most soldiers, he’d learned not to take much time when it came to eating. But that evening, he purposely slowed down so that he could talk to her longer. The soup was lukewarm when he ate the last bite and it was still only eight thirty, which meant it was a long time until he could fall asleep.
“How about hot chocolate to go with some of those cookies? We could have it in the living room,” he asked.
“I’d love that.” Her smile lit up the whole house. Hell, it lit up all of the state, but then it always did.
“I’ll make it. You just sit there and look pretty,” he said.
“Do you wear contact lenses? If so, you need to have them changed. I’m about as plain jane as they come.” Her laughter was like light piercing through the deepest darkness.
“Beauty, beholder, and all that stuff,” he said. “My hot chocolate is almost as amazing as your soup. I start with a package of instant, only I use half milk and half whipping cream instead of water. Then I put in just a drop of peppermint and a squirt of whipped cream on the top.”
She took the wrappings from the cookies. “Sounds great. Hey, Mama made brown sugar fudge. I love it better than all the other candies put together.”
“Addy makes that every year. It’s my favorite, too.” He finished the chocolate and carried it to the table.
She handed him the platter of candy and cookies and he took a piece of brown fudge and a chocolate chip cookie. Dipping the cookie into the chocolate and then getting it to his mouth before it all fell back into the cup was a trick, but he managed.
She followed his lead. “Best way to eat a cookie. You’re right about this hot chocolate. It’s the best I’ve ever had.”
“Addy taught me to make it,” he said. “Is Christmas your favorite holiday?”
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