by Lylah James
But he shut me out every time, first gentle and then rude and heartless.
Every time I was with him, I felt a pull. His touch was fire, his voice silk. And his eyes penetrated my soul.
I should fear him. I did fear him, but under the layers of fear, I cared. He made me feel even when I didn’t want to.
Neither of us wanted to feel. We both tried to hide it.
I walked into the kitchen and found Maddie and Lena there. “Hey,” Maddie chirped from her spot behind the counter.
Lena turned to face me and wiped her hands in her apron. “Good morning, Ayla,” she said with a sweet smile.
Smiling back, I gave her a hug. “Good morning,” I said as I stepped out of her warm embrace. I helped them in the kitchen, trying not to think about that morning.
“I’ll message the others to set the table,” Maddie muttered as she took out her phone. She was still typing the message when I saw Viktor walking into the kitchen, his face hard and cold.
“Boss wants his breakfast in his office,” he said briskly before leaving. We didn’t even have a chance to reply.
Was Alessio going to eat alone? I thought back to our earlier encounter, his fury as he told me to leave the room, and the flash of pain I saw in his eyes before he shut me out.
I felt someone nudge me, snapping out of my thoughts. Maddie stared at me in confusion.
“What’s wrong? You’ve been quiet this morning,” she asked, leaning her elbows on the counter as she waited for an answer.
I shrugged.
Maddie leaned forward. “Is it about Alessio?”
I chuckled. “You are a mind reader, Maddie.”
Her eyes twinkled and she winked. “I know. So, what happened?”
“Well, last night, I went to the piano room and Alessio caught me there. But when I was about to leave, he let me play—”
“What?” she squealed. “You played the piano? Alessio let you play the piano?” Her mouth hung open in shock.
I nodded.
“Wait. You played the piano in front of Alessio?”
Before I could answer, she continued, “Ayla, this is big! He never lets anyone play the piano. It’s forbidden. It’s his mother’s, and since her death, nobody was allowed to play it.”
The news took my breath away and I stared at her in shock.
If that’s why he was angry at me, why did he let me play in the first place?
I bit down on my lips in frustration. Alessio was a confusing man.
“Mom! Did you hear that? Alessio let Ayla play the piano!” Maddie exclaimed loudly next to my ear. Wincing, I took a step away.
“Yes. I heard,” Lena replied, her voice soft. I turned toward her and saw that she was smiling at me, her eyes shining merrily.
Turning back to Maddie, I continued, “But it didn’t end well. He ordered me to leave afterwards. He was really angry. And this morning too.”
“This morning?”
“I went back to check on him to make sure he cleaned his wounds. But he didn’t. So, I cleaned them for him. He was nice about it, but then got angry again,” I muttered.
“Wait. You cleaned his wounds and he got angry at you?” Maddie bristled slightly. When I nodded, she placed her hands on her hips and tapped her foot on the ground in annoyance. “God, he is so damn annoying. What exactly did he say?”
At her question, I grew somber. “I kind of told him that we all need comforting sometimes and he shouldn’t have to deal with it alone. But he got really angry and told me to stay in my limits. And he yelled at me to leave.”
“What. An. Ungrateful. Bastard,” Maddie growled.
“Maddie! Watch your language,” Lena scolded.
“I’m serious, Mom. How dare he? Ayla helped him, and this is how he treats her?”
“We all know how he is. Alessio doesn’t like the attention. Or comfort. He doesn’t do well with emotions.” Lena placed a comforting hand on my back.
“I know,” I whispered.
Maddie still looked angry. “Maybe you should have just left his hands bloody so they would get infected. He sure as hell deserves it. Asshole.”
“Maddie! Enough!” Lena reprimanded her loudly.
“Fine!” She crossed her arms against her chest. Lena gave her a glare, but it didn’t look threatening at all. I didn’t think she could ever look angry, even she tried hard.
After giving Maddie another serious look, she turned to me and palmed my cheek. “Don’t take Alessio too seriously. He is like that to everyone. Give him some time,” she said softly, before smiling and then walking out of the kitchen.
As soon as Lena was out of sight, Maddie started swearing. “That little fucker. He is lucky I wasn’t there. I would have sucker punched him for talking like that to you. Asshole. Jerk.”
She kept going, moving around the kitchen almost furiously. She slammed a plate full of breakfast on a tray and then made a glass of protein while I stood there watching her rage. When Maddie was done, she pushed the tray in my hand.
“Go give that him,” she ordered.
Was she crazy? Why would she send me back to the lion’s den?
“What? No.” I pushed the tray back.
“Nuh-uh, girl. You are going up there and giving him his breakfast. And you are going to act like nothing happened.”
When I didn’t move, she sighed and her shoulders dropped. “Considering how long I have known him, I’m pretty sure he is feeling guilty right now. So you are going to go up there and make him feel guiltier and shitty about himself. Yeah?”
“Maddie—”
“Trust me. He will probably even apologize. But you are going to act nonchalant and walk away. Understood? Make. Him. Feel. Guilty,” she huffed.
I tried to shake my head but she was already talking over me. “Ayla, you are too sweet for your own good. Which makes it much worse. You didn’t deserve how he treated you. So, humor me, okay? Please.”
“No,” I snapped.
Maddie threw her hands in the air in frustration.
“Maddie, I don’t want to hurt him. He is angry and doesn’t want to see me,” I replied.
“And that’s where you are wrong. Alessio wants to see you. He let you play the piano, for God’s sake. It means something. It means a lot. He is just frustrated at himself and that’s why he took it out on you,” Maddie explained in a rush. “I know him, Ayla. Just do as I tell you and everything will be good.”
“But—”
Maddie shook her head. “No. You are getting late. Go give Alessio his breakfast.” When I didn’t move, she gently pushed me toward the door. “Go. And good luck! You can do this.”
As I slowly walked out of the kitchen, I heard Maddie call out behind me, “I’ll be waiting here for you.”
“Okay,” I muttered, my voice trembling.
I passed by Nikolay and Viktor as I made my way upstairs. The tiny hairs on the back of my neck prickled as I felt their stares on my back, but I kept my gaze down, purposely avoiding them.
With each step I took toward Alessio’s office, my heart hammered almost painfully in my chest. My hands grew cold and a trickle of sweat ran down my neck and between my shoulder blades.
Stopping in front of the door, I took a deep breath and then brought my hand up. As soon as my fist knocked against the door, Alessio’s voice came through.
“Come in.”
I walked inside to find him facing away from me. He was only wearing his black shirt and black slacks. I cleared my throat and he quickly turned around, his eyes widening at the sight of me.
I sighed in relief when I noticed he had showered. He was wearing a clean dress shirt, and his hair appeared wet. His face was cleaned from the blood too.
I also noticed that he was struggling to wrap his bandages again.
“I brought your breakfast,” I said, surprisingly without stuttering. He stared at me silently, his face impassive, and then he nodded toward the coffee table.
I placed the tray down befor
e straightening and turning to look at Alessio. We stared at each other for a second before I stared at his hands.
Taking a step closer, I cleared my throat again before nervously asking, “Do you want me to bandage them again?”
He had made it clear that he didn’t want my help before, but there was nothing wrong in offering to help again. Right? It was his choice to accept it or not.
Alessio looked down at his hands and then shook his head. “No. It’s okay. I’ll do it.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes,” he responded briskly. He tried to wrap the bandages around his hands and I stayed still as I watched him struggle with it.
It was a mess. Without thinking of the consequences, I walked to him and took his hands in mine. Alessio went rigid and I felt his breath on my forehead. With my head bent, I started to wrap the bandages around his hands.
He stood perfectly still, his muscles barely moving. His breathing was slightly erratic. My heart thumped in my chest and my stomach twisted nervously at being this close to him.
When I was done, I stepped back and gave him a wan smile. “Done,” I whispered as our eyes met.
Alessio didn’t answer. I didn’t expect him to. Giving him another smile, I turned around and started to walk away. Just as I neared the door, his voice stopped me.
“Wait,” he demanded.
I stopped. When I heard him sigh, I decided to face him. Turning around, I saw him running his hand through his hair. He looked down and then leaned against his desk, crossing his ankles.
“About this morning,” Alessio started as he looked back up. “I shouldn’t have yelled. That was a mistake.”
He looked a little uncomfortable. Even though his words were meant to be nice, his face was still hard and cold. But I didn’t care. It was the words that mattered. It wasn’t an apology but it was enough for me.
That was all I needed to hear.
My heart fluttered at what he said and I smiled again. “Okay,” I replied.
Alessio nodded and if I wasn’t mistaken, he looked relieved.
Maddie had been right. He had been feeling guilty. But I was glad that my acceptance took this burden away from him.
When the room filled with silence again, I took it as my cue to leave. But Alessio spoke again. His words took my breath away, my hand going to my chest.
“You can keep playing the piano if you want.”
I stared at him in confusion as my heart went wild. I had to lock my knees together to keep from falling on the floor.
Hope blossomed in me at his words and all I wanted to do was cry.
“I can?”
Alessio nodded and his expression changed to slight embarrassment. “That’s my way of making it up to you,” he replied.
How could he be sweet and gentle yet heartless and cruel at the same time?
His words meant one thing, while his actions spoke something else entirely.
I was scared to hope…only because he could change his mind in the blink of an eye and it would crush me. But I couldn’t help the feeling of happiness coursing through my body.
“Thank you,” I said, my voice filled with emotions and gratefulness as tears blinded my vision.
He nodded again without saying anything. He appeared to swallow almost nervously.
After a few seconds of him avoiding eye contact with me while I stared at him through tear-filled eyes, I decided it was time for me to leave.
Turning around, I reached for the knob, but didn’t open the door. Instead I paused and wiped my tears away before whispering again, “Thank you.”
I didn’t know if he heard it or not, but I didn’t give him a chance to answer. Opening the door, I walked out, my body light with contentment.
I skipped downstairs, barely containing the smile on my face.
As soon as I got to the kitchen, I ran to Maddie and hugged her tightly. She laughed.
“I take it things went well. I would say very well from that expression on your face,” Maddie said lightly as she hugged me back.
I nodded and then laughed with merriment. “He told me I can keep playing the piano!”
Maddie’s eyes softened even further and she smiled brightly. “There you go. See, I told you.”
“Maddie. I think I am…happy.”
“I know. I’m happy too.”
I nodded and smiled back. My cheeks were hurting from smiling too much and too hard.
When was the last time I smiled and laughed like this?
I didn’t know. I didn’t care.
All that mattered was what I felt now.
Chapter 32
2 weeks later
“Maddie, stop!” I giggled as she continued to tickle my sides. “Ouch. It hurts. Stop!”
“That’s what you get for throwing whipped cream in my face.” She laughed.
“You did it first,” I argued back through my giggling.
“Ahh, stop…too much…I can’t breathe…”
“Do you accept defeat?” she growled, trying to mimic Alessio’s voice. That made me laugh even harder.
“Yes. Yes. Oh my God.” I breathed out as she slowly stopped her attack on my sides.
But as soon as she let me go, I twisted around and caught her by the legs. Giving her a challenging look, I trapped her legs underneath mine and started to tickle her.
It was my turn to laugh.
“Got you!”
She was struggling and gasping for air through her laughter.
“Maddie! Ayla!”
I quickly stopped tickling her when I heard Lena’s voice from behind me.
“Busted,” Maddie whispered.
Rolling off her, I stood up and straightened my dress while she did the same.
“What did you do to my kitchen?” she gasped. The horrified look on her face was funny. Bringing my hand up, I coughed into my palm to mask my laughter. Maddie didn’t even try to hide it.
“There is whipped cream everywhere! You guys were suppose to make dessert, not turn the kitchen into dessert!” Lena said almost angrily, with her hands on her hips as she leveled us both with a glare.
“Sorry, Lena. We will clean it up. Promise,” I said with a smile and blinked innocently at her.
“Don’t try to act innocent with me, young lady. Maddie is rubbing off you,” she remarked.
Maddie laughed again and linked her arms through mine. “Definitely,” she said with a wink. Lena shook her head but I saw the smile peeking on the corner of her lips.
“Don’t worry, Mom. Ayla and I will clean it up in no time.”
“You better. C’mon. Hurry to work now,” Lena replied before turning around and walking out of the kitchen.
“Lena is right. We did make a mess of the kitchen,” I said with a sigh as I looked around.
It had been two weeks and I felt like I had been given a new life. Two weeks and I’d had no nightmares, my sleep filled with peacefulness. Two weeks of only laughter and smiles.
I felt happiness that I had never felt before. At first, I was scared that maybe all of this was a dream. I was scared that all of it would be taken away from me. But when I woke up each day and was still living this life, I started to hope that maybe this was it.
This was my new beginning.
“Done?” Maddie asked. Her voice snapped me out of my thoughts and I smiled. Looking at the cleaned counters, I nodded.
“Done,” I replied.
“C’mon, let’s go. There is still about two hours before dinner. We can fit a movie in,” she said cheerfully as she pulled me out of the kitchen.
As we made our way upstairs to my room, Maddie chatted about her day with Artur. She was definitely lost in him. I asked her if she loved him, but her response was that she didn’t know.
I didn’t believe her.
I was sure she loved him but was scared to admit it. She had nothing to be scared of. From what I had witnessed, Artur really did care about Maddie.
When we reached the top of the s
tairs, I stopped dead in my tracks. In the process of doing so, Maddie had to stop too.
“Huh? What’s wrong?” she asked.
All I could do was stare in front of me in shock.
Not again.
Then I heard Maddie mutter angrily. “Seriously?”
There he was. Alessio. But he wasn’t alone. He was with Nina, the same blonde I had seen in his office.
Alessio had her pressed against the wall, with her legs wrapped around his waist. They were kissing and didn’t appear to realize we were standing there.
“Seriously, dude. You wanna fuck, then get a room. That’s what rooms are for,” Maddie hissed loudly.
Alessio’s head snapped back and he stared at us, his gaze laced with lust. I shifted my eyes away.
“Well, you can leave if you don’t want to see anything,” Nina fired back.
“This is a hallway. Anyone can pass through and nobody wants to see your saggy boobs hanging loose, so get a room,” Maddie said, her voice calm yet filled with venom.
“You know…” Nina started to say, but she didn’t finish. Alessio had opened his door and was about to go inside, with Nina still wrapped around him like a vise.
She turned her head toward us and gave us a smirk before burying her face in his neck. That was the last thing I saw as the door closed.
“That little bitch. I swear to God, I will rip those fake hair extensions off her head one day. She makes me so violent. And I swear, I’m not a violent person,” Maddie fumed beside me.
“Why do you hate her so much?” I asked as we entered my room.
“Is that even a question, Ayla? She is freaking annoying. Nina thinks that just because Alessio fucks her, she is special. Like, bitch, please, he fucks anyone with boobs and a pussy.”
I watched her jump on my bed and lay down.
“Nina probably thinks that he will marry her one day. So delusional. Alessio doesn’t even care for her. She is just so easy and always comes for more. If she never comes back, Alessio wouldn’t even bat an eye or go looking for her. He has plenty of other women lining up for him.”
“Hmm,” I said, stretching out beside her.
“But I hate her because she is ruining my ship.”
My forehead creased in confusion at her words. “What do you mean?”
