by Dianne Drake
Was it the baby that was causing him to hesitate? Or his fear that when she was better she’d go back to being the Deanna Lambert who wanted to go it alone? “I don’t know,” he admitted.
“Then I’d suggest you find out, son. Instead of complicating the thing, simplify it. If you love her, tell her, then find a way to make it work.”
“Easy for you to say,” Beau said, then he headed down the surgical hall and straight into the scrub room. The thing was, it was easy for him to say, too.
“I love Deanna Lambert,” he said, as he tapped the faucet on with his foot and began the scrubbing routine. “I love Deanna Lambert.” So now it was time to step up to that love and find out if she loved him back. Or be miserable in silence for a long, long time. Maybe for ever.
* * *
Oh, how she didn’t want to wake up, but that’s what the voices were telling her to do. Cloudy voices, distant voices. And...she could hear Beau.
“Wake up, Deanna. It’s over now. Baby’s doing fine, and you’re doing fine.”
Baby’s doing fine. Beautiful words that made her feel so much better. “Your baby,” she murmured.
“We’ll talk about that later. Right now, you just need to concentrate on opening your eyes.”
Other voices she didn’t recognize chimed in. They wanted her eyes open, too. “Don’t want to,” she shouted, or was she just whispering? In her head it all sounded the same.
“Sure you do. You want to wake up and open your eyes.”
Beau’s voice again. For him, she did want to wake up and open her eyes. Only for him. “Love him,” she murmured. “I love him.”
“I think that was meant for you,” Brax said.
Brax, what was he doing here? He shouldn’t be here, too. “Lucas?” she forced herself to say.
“He’s fine. Don’t worry. Kelli Dawson is keeping him until one of us gets back to Sugar Creek.” Beau brushed his fingers across her cheek. “And if you ever even hint that you don’t have maternal instincts, Deanna Lambert, I’m going remind you of your first two concerns coming out of anesthesia. “
“But he’s OK,” she said, sighing. “That’s good, because I’m going to keep him if I can.” Now she felt better. Lucas was fine. Her baby was fine. Beau was here. “All good,” she said, then let the clouds roll over her consciousness for a while longer.
“It’s about time,” Beau said, only a moment later.
This time she did open her eyes, and the only person she saw was Beau. “How long was I...?”
“We tried waking you a couple of hours ago, but you weren’t ready. Once you knew that Lucas and your baby were fine, you drifted off with a smile on your face. A beautiful smile.”
“Hope I didn’t say anything I shouldn’t.”
“Nothing you shouldn’t, but...” He paused then walked over to the window. It was a small hospital in a beautiful area, and Deanna’s view for the next couple of days would be a mountain. “But some of the things you were trying to tell me were...well, pretty crazy. About the baby being...”
“Yours?”
“It’s not an easy subject for me, Deanna.” He turned to face her. “I know you were in a lot of pain then under anesthesia, so I understand that some of the things you said might be a little off. But there’s something you have to know. Back when I was married, my wife drove me crazy with her obsession with getting pregnant. Every day, every night she came at me with it and I gave in to something I shouldn’t have done.
“Like I told you, she’d come to the hospital, and it was embarrassing me. She asked me to bank my sperm so if I wasn’t available when she was ovulating... I did, because I was feeling so guilty and so pressured. Then when you told me the baby you’re carrying is mine, and you said there was a mix-up with the sperm used in fertilizing Emily’s egg...”
He drew in a ragged breath. “To cut a long story short, I found an e-mail from Nancy to her lawyer, asking him approximately how much she’d be entitled to if she had my baby as opposed to how much she’d get if she simply walked away.
“I’d had this inheritance from my mother and she wanted as much as she could get. So I had the sperm destroyed, gave her a settlement just to be done with it, and...and that’s about it. Until you said...”
“I’m having your baby. I’m so sorry, but it’s the truth. My cousin Emily—her husband’s name is Alexander Braxton and it seems his sperm was destroyed accidentally. Maybe in place of yours, I don’t know. But Emily’s egg was fertilized with your sperm. My lawyers had to fight to get the information, but that’s what happened.
“And when Emily found out, she told Alex, who said he wasn’t going to raise another man’s child. He gave Emily a choice—him or her baby. She chose her baby, and she was leaving him when...” She shut her eyes. “It was raining that night, she missed a turn. And I became a real mother to her child. My child. Your child. Except with the things you’ve said...”
“Damn,” he muttered.
“You have a right to question me, Beau. I understand. Especially after what Nancy—”
“No. I don’t question what you’re saying, Deanna. You’re not lying to me. But that’s what your conflicts have been about, isn’t it? Telling me.”
“I tried, Beau. So many times I tried. But I was scared, because I was falling in love with you and I didn’t know...”
“You didn’t know what I would do because of all the stupid things I said. Deanna, I’m so sorry. You were hearing my anger, because I’ve never completely put it behind me. Brax keeps telling me I need to move on, but it’s like so many things in my life were frozen in place. Until I met you. Then I wanted that change to happen, but you never let me in completely, so, instead of risking being hurt again, I put up my defenses. And I’m so sorry.”
“But you didn’t know. How could you? I’m the one who should be apologizing because I never meant to hurt you, Beau.”
“Would you have told me if the baby’s life hadn’t been in danger?”
“I would have. But I thought that would put up a wall between us that would never come down, and because Lucas and Brax... I really do want to adopt Lucas if I can, so I had to consider what was best for him, and that was being around you and Brax. He needs you both right now, and I didn’t want my situation to pull him away from you. After his situation was resolved, I would have told you about the baby. I promise, I would have told you.”
“And now I’m going to be a father,” he said somberly.
“Any way you want to do it, Beau. You do have a choice in this, and I’ll respect it.”
“Did you come to Sugar Creek to spy on me?” he asked, a twinkle popping into his eyes.
“Spying was all I meant to do. I knew what kind of person Emily was, but I wanted to know what kind of person my baby’s father was. I think it was part of my need to put off accepting how my life was changing, the real pain of missing my cousin, maybe a whole lot of other things I haven’t figured out yet. But I wanted to know, wanted to see for myself.”
“Then look what happened.”
“Just look,” she murmured, as her eyelids started to flutter down.
“Before you go back to sleep, would you answer one more question for me?” he asked, leaning over the bed rail.
“I’ll try,” she said, her eyes not opening again.
“Will you marry me, Deanna? Stay here in Sugar Creek with me? Raise our baby together, adopt Lucas, put up with my hectic lifestyle and deal with my cantankerous old grandfather? Or do it in New York and start a new life together there. Any way you want to do it, because I love you.”
“With you,” she said. “I want to do it with...” Sigh. Over and out.
“Well, it wasn’t the most romantic proposal, but I’ll do it again, Deanna. When you’ll remember it.” He bent over and kissed her on the forehead, then
pulled aside her gown, looked at her belly, bandaged as it was, and smiled. “Our baby.”
* * *
“Emily Rose Alexander,” Deanna said, cradling her daughter in her arms. “Do you know how much your mommy and daddy love you?” They were living in the ranch house now, and Brax had bought and moved to the cabin up on the ridge, happy to be someplace with a better view. He was practicing medicine again in a limited capacity, mornings only, while Beau and Lucas tended the horses. And Deanna was continuing her consultant work, but only part time, and always with her daughter close by.
In their efforts to expand medical services, Beau and Deanna had even brought in a pediatrician to take care of the increasing kiddie population in the area. The clinic was expanding, life was expanding, and it was everything Emily would have wanted for her daughter. Everything Deanna wanted for her daughter and son.
“When can she come outside and play with me?” Lucas asked impatiently. The same question he’d been asking for weeks.
“Not for a few years,” Beau said, settling down on the couch next to Deanna. “And, Lucas, you’d better put on your boots because your grandpa is on his way here to give you a riding lesson.”
“Grandpa’s more fun than Emily,” Lucas said. “She can’t do anything.”
Beau and Deanna looked at each other, smiling. Lucas was legally their son now. There hadn’t been much of a legal ordeal since there was no family to be found. And he was turning into a grandpa’s boy. Great-grandpa, actually. Of course Brax was spoiling him rotten. “And Grandpa’s going to teach Emily to ride when she’s old enough,” Beau said.
As Lucas scampered off in pursuit of his riding boots, Deanna handed Emily over to Beau then started to stand up. But he grabbed her hand and pulled her back down to the sofa next to him.
“As much as I’d love staying here with the two of you, I’ve got a couple of patients coming in this afternoon.”
“But I’m the doctor,” Beau said, as he made faces at his daughter.
“And I’m the nurse who shares her husband’s practice, and handles minor cases so he can have more time with his family.” She smiled. “Remember the plan to keep you less obsessed?”
“I’ve got a house call later on. And I promised Arthur I’d stop by for a few minutes. He’s writing a book on his journey from heart attack to fitness guru and he wants me to check a couple of his medical facts.”
“And I’ve got to take Lucas for pizza while you’re gone. It’s a date for just the two of us, and Brax is going to have an evening alone with Emily, which he’s been pestering me about for days.”
“What about us?” Beau said, feigning a hurt expression. “When do we get some time alone?”
“Trust me, I’ve got you penciled in. Tonight. Champagne. Dim lights. Soft music. Hot tub for starters.”
“Then what?” he asked, his attention now fully diverted from Emily to Deanna.
“Everything,” Deanna said, scooting in closer to him, then laying her head on his shoulder. “Absolutely everything.”
* * * * *
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ISBN: 9781460313046
Copyright © 2013 by Dianne Despain
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This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. This edition published by arrangement with Harlequin Books S.A.
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