When wrong feels so right

by Mia Ford

  “I guess so.” He pauses and bites down on his bottom lip. “I mean, it was kind of just the path that was laid out for me. It was expected of me, and I just went with it.”

  “Do you love it? Is it what you want?”

  “I… I do like it,” he says slowly. “But I don’t know if it’s the path I would have chosen for myself if given the option. I work well with it now though, it is what it is.”

  It is what it is. That seems to be his motto for life. I wonder if he lets things happen to him because he doesn’t know how to change. Just like I’m stuck in my rut and I don’t know how to get out.

  “Wow, that’s…” I gulp loudly and I try to work out what I should say next. I feel like I might want to tell him more about me. “It’s rough. I know my life is different, but my father’s MS,” I watch his face which doesn’t change. Erica clearly told him this part. I guess it means I don’t have to explain more, “means my life is controlled too. Just in a different way.” I sigh loudly, not regretfully because I don’t mind staying for my dad, but still it’s hard because everything has always been on hold. “He needs me to care for him, and I’m all he has left.”

  “You’re a good person, I hope you know that.”

  “Well, thank you. And I don’t know if it means anything but I think you’re a good person too. You’ve stuck by your family, even when things got tough.”

  He looks shocked. “Wow, I don’t think anyone has ever said that to me before.”

  I smile warmly at him, hoping he can see that I truly do mean it. “Well it’s true.”

  As we eat I can see Brandon looking at me. At first I think the expression is one of an awe or maybe a little confusion, but then it changes. His face reminds me of how he looked on the night when we first met. When I was up on stage fantasizing about him like an insane person and he was undressing with his eyes. It makes me shiver. It makes me wonder where tonight will lead.

  “So, tell me more about yourself Brandon Heath-Smith. I would love to learn everything about you.”

  He muses upon this for a moment. “I don’t know what there is to tell really. I’m more of a workaholic than I always told myself I would be, and I… I haven’t ever committed to anything else.”

  I wonder if he’s trying to let me know in a subtle way that he’s not in this for the long haul, which is just fine by me. I knew that before I even jumped in on that first night. The sexy stranger who sweeps through the bar while he’s in town on business, isn’t the man who sticks around forever more. He’s just the one for fun.

  I grin. “Yeah, I guess I haven’t committed to anything else but work either. I guess it just is what it is.”

  As I use his own catch phrase back at him he sees that I get it. We both know what this is and we need to enjoy it while the moment is here. It’ll only be a fleeting one so we need to make it magical while we can.

  Chapter 8 – Brandon

  “Did you want to take a walk?” Lola asks me sweetly once the conversation is over. “Take a look around the farm? I know it isn’t much, it certainly isn’t what it used to be when I was younger, but it’s still ours. It’s pretty cool. Or I think it is.”

  “Sure, that sounds great.” Actually, I think I’d like to see more of her life. Even if this is only a short term thing. Plus, she looks cool in her denim skirt and her vest top. I’m sure if we go outside she’ll put those sexy as hell cowboy boots on as well. My heart rate instantly kicks up a notch as I think about her in that way again. “I think if you’re going to tell me more about your farm, you’ll have to wear a cowgirl hat though. Do you have one?”

  She leans behind one of her chairs and she pulls one out, which causes fireworks to explode in my chest. She’s just so damn hot. How did I get so lucky? My luck only intensifies as she slides her gorgeous feet into those cowboy boots.

  “Come on. Let’s go.”

  As we walk through the door and out into the farm, a chill runs up and down my spine, but I don’t think it’s from the cold at all. I think it’s all to do with this gorgeous red head next to me. She points things out to me, showing me the animals and telling me all about how it used to be, back in the day, which gives me an insight into her childhood as well. I can see that when her parents were fine she had a happy time here, and I think she wants to cling onto that a lot… even if it’s never coming back.

  It’s sweet, she’s lovely. I think I might secretly like her a little bit more than I should.

  “And what’s this bad boy?” I ask as I pat my hand against some rusty metal that’s in the shed. “This looks like an interesting contraption.”

  “You are joking, right?” She giggles disbelievingly at me. “That’s a tractor. There’s no way in hell that you’ve never seen a tractor before.”

  I ignore her dig and continue talking. “Do you ride around the farm on this? I imagine that’s a sexy sight.”

  “What me on this old thing?” She gives me a curious look. “Are you sure? I’m on it all the time and I will be until we finally can afford to hire some farm hands.”

  “Wow.” I slide my eyes closed. “Yeah I can see it now. It’s incredible.”

  As I head some clunking I snap my eyes back open to see Lola lifting herself up into the tractor. As she pulls herself upwards I get a glimpse of her red spotted cotton panties. Instantly I’m hard. This girl is like no one I’ve ever spent time with before. Usually the women I hang out with are prissy, only wanting to do things where others can see them to prove that they’re doing something exciting. If I was hanging out with a girl from the city, probably a hundred pictures would have made their way onto social media already. Their clothes would be perfect and no hair out of place. Perfect make up. Any pantie viewing would be completely on purpose… but Lola isn’t that way. She’s so carefree and sweet.

  Damn, she’s getting right into my head and driving me wild.

  “Like this?” She smirks at me while grabbing onto a steering wheel type device. Her hip pops out and she looks amazing. “Is this how you imagine it?”

  “Mmm, yeah that looks good. Just like a fantasy girl.”

  When Lola laughs at me, she flings her head back and lets the sound run free. “I don’t think I’ve ever been described as that before.”

  What the hell is wrong with all the guys around here? There must be men, there must be some red blooded guys that fancy girls. There must be someone who would be attracted to Lola. Maybe she just doesn’t like them in the same way. Maybe that’s the problem.

  “Hey, do you want to come up here with me? There are two seats.” She shifts across and pats the chair next to her. “See what it’s like up here in a tractor.”

  I’m not dressed right to be plonking my butt onto a dirty old tractor, but I don’t care about that. I want to be next to Lola right now, I want to dive right into her world, so I do it. I yank myself up and I take the seat next to her.

  “Hmmm, yeah it’s pretty cool up here.” I nod and agree with her. “I see why you like it.”

  I turn my head to look at Lola and almost instantly desire jolts through me. I can see a deep lust dancing behind Lola’s gaze and it makes me wonder what the hell is going to happen here. Is she really thinking about that, here? I mean I’m definitely down for that, I’m always up for new experiences, especially with a girl so beautiful.

  Fuck it, I can’t wait any longer. I cup my hand around her cheek and I pull her to me for a kiss. As her lips move against mine, the stirring in my underwear intensifies and drives me absolutely insane. I cross my left leg over my right and I slide my body closer to hers.

  Eventually, I slide my hands up into her hair and I deepen the kiss. Then I move my mouth away from hers and I start to kiss her neck. Already she’s slick with sweat which I lick off with my tongue. I can feel her heart hammering against her rig cage which suggests she’s just as damn turned on as me.

  “Oh, Lola,” I moan, letting my breath tickle across her skin. “Oh God.”

  She seems to sense t
hat I’m so full of lust that I’m willing to let her take control of the situation and she takes advantage of that. She pushes me back until I’m flat against the cold metal seat and she drops to her knees on the floor between my legs.

  “What are you…?” I start to ask, but as she runs her tongue tantalizingly across her wet, plump lips. “Oh, fucking hell, Lola, you are killing me.”

  Her fingers fiddle with the zipper on my trousers, brushing past my cock as she does, which stiffens my cock rock hard. I almost wonder if she knows what she’s doing and she’s driving me wild on purpose. My head falls back, my eyes slide closed, ragged intense breaths fall out of my mouth. I’m on fire, every single scrap of my body is hypersensitive and crazy. I almost don’t know what’s going on here.

  Finally, she pulls me free and she grips onto my shaft tightly. I prize my eyes apart to glance down at her and the sight I can see is the sexiest fucking thing in my whole damn life. She’s looking up at me as she runs her hand all over me, and her wide eyes filled with sexual lust is wonderful. The fact that we’re on a fucking tractor in the middle of a shed in the middle of nowhere… well that just makes it even more insane. This gives it the thrill of us getting caught, with only a minute possibility of that actually happening.

  “Oh fucking hell, Lola,” I rasp as she picks up the pace. “Oh shit.”

  Then she causes my hips to buck by pressing her lips over my tip, soaking it with her lips. Her tongue darts out from between her lips and she licks me like I’m a damn lollypop or something. My fingers curl around the hard, uncomfortable chair beneath me and I grip so tightly that my knuckles turn white, just to keep myself steady.

  As her mouth opens and she finally takes me in, right down to the back of her throat. I hit the back of her throat which makes her gag ever so slightly, but then she continues by tracing her mouth up and down me, flickering her tongue everywhere.

  I’ve been in a similar position with many other chicks before, but there’s something about this time with Lola which is just so much better. I don’t know if it’s her plump lips, her soaking mouth, her wide eyes, or something else. Either way it feels phenomenal.

  Just when I think it can’t get any better, Lola’s fingers trace along my thighs and with one of her hands she reaches down to tickle her fingers along my balls. It’s an unexpected, excitable sensation that runs right through my body and all the way to the end of my cock.

  Fucking hell, she really is a surprise. I thought I was going to be the one to corrupt her…

  “Stop,” I finally rasp when I feel myself getting too close to exploding. “Oh fuck, Lola stop. I want to…” Can I say it? Yes, I think I can. “I want to be inside you.”

  Lola instantly drags her lips off of me and she gives me a wicked smile. I tuck my hands under her arm pits and I pull her upright. Then, I tug her until she climbs up onto my lap and she straddles me. As we kiss hard and fast, I take one of my fingers and I run it along the cotton of her gorgeous panties. I want to rip them off, tear them with my teeth, but for now I’ll have to be satisfied with pulling them to one side.

  I use one hand to flick my fingers over her hardened clit, making her hips roll violently towards me at a rapid pace, and I use the other to grab a condom from my pocket. In an expert way, I don’t break contact with Lola as I roll the condom down over myself, so soon I’m completely ready for her. More than fucking ready, since she’s driven me to the edge.

  As Lola angles herself over me and she pushes herself down, I grunt loudly. She’s so tight around me, but so wet. Wrapping her lips around me must have turned her on so much that she’s almost at the edge as well.

  There’s something about this girl… something fucking special.

  I buck my hips and drive deeper into her, thrusting hard and fast. Lola grabs onto my shoulders and she rides me intensely, with a serene look on her face. A thick pleasure swirls between us, the chemistry and the bond grows deeper. I can’t stop looking at her face, she’s so beautiful, even more so when she’s in the heat of the moment. It’s a face that I could look at for the rest of my life.

  As the pleasure explodes free from me and Lola at pretty much the same time, I grip tightly onto her and hold her close to my body. The realization that this is the best I’ve ever felt doesn’t go unnoticed, but luckily I just about manage to keep it inside for now.

  Chapter 9 – Lola

  I feel like I’m skipping on air, the way that I have been for the past few weeks since Brandon first rocked up into my life out of the blue. Despite the fact that we both know exactly what this is and neither of us have any expectations, we’ve fallen into a bit of a boyfriend and girlfriend role. I work all day on the farm, while taking care of my father in between, he works his hours on the building site and he comes to watch me every single time I play in the bar, and when all those times are over, we hang out, just me and him. Sometimes we eat out in the diner, sometimes we have dinner and watch a movie at my place, occasionally we go for a walk through the town, just for fun…

  I do have to keep reminding myself that this moment is only fleeting, and I’m absolutely certain that when Brandon has to return to his real life, forcing me back into mine, I’ll miss him like crazy. I suppose that at least I’ve proven to myself that I can make room for someone in my life. As long as it’s the right person. I can’t imagine anyone like Brandon passing through my life anytime soon, but maybe when he does I’ll be much more open to it.

  As I step out of my shower and I glance at my reflection in the mirror, I can’t help noticing how bright my smile is. I barely even look like the girl I once was, the one who had the world weighing on her shoulders. My red hair looks shinier, my skin is glowing, my eyes are sparkling… I wish I could be this version of myself forever.

  “Right,” I mutter to myself as I riffle through my drawer. “What shall I wear today?”

  Usually I don’t bother to care too much about how I look. I toss on whatever I can get my hands on without much thinking about it. The only time I consider my appearance is when I’m up on stage. I like to look good for my fake Madison Square Garden audience. Now though, I can tell that Brandon likes it when I look like a cowgirl, so I enjoy playing that role for him. It’s just a whole lot of fun, just like all of this…

  As I stare into my drawer, my mind wanders off. I keep trying to stop it doing this, but the dreamer side of me won’t leave however much I want it to. In my mind, I take away the restrictions surrounding me and Brandon, I rid us of the fact that it won’t ever become something long term and I imagine him holding me in his arms, living inside my home, being with me forever. It’s a nice idea and it fills my chest with an intense warmth that I would love to cling onto… but eventually I have to let it go. I have to shake my head and bring myself back to the present moment. It’s a nice idea, but that’s it.

  “Knock, knock.” I spin around in shock as I hear the all too familiar voice ringing out from behind me. A chocolaty smooth wonderful voice, “Can I come in?”

  “Well, I am naked,” I say with a smirk as I tug my towel up higher around me. “But I’m just about to get dressed so I suppose you can come in.”

  “You don’t have to, but I suppose I need you to if we’re going to go out today.”

  “We’re going out?” I tug some panties up around my ankles, hoping I look at least a little dignified as I do so. “But it’s so early. Shouldn’t you be at work? Doesn’t the whole building site fall apart when you’re not there?”

  “Apparently not.” Brandon flops into one of my chairs like he belongs there, only bringing my fantasy back out once more. I would love it if he could belong there! “Since I’ve got the rest of the day off. I thought after I’ve helped you around the farm and with your father, we could go for a walk. But a really long one where you can show me all your old haunts. Nothing teaches me more about a person than were they used to underage drink something that tastes like paint stripper.”

  “Oh, the dump,” I say with a grin. “That s
ounds fun. And actually, I’m finished on the farm today which is why I’m getting showered and dressed so early.” Now that I actually have my clothes on now, I can claim that. “So that works out well.”

  “Do you want to go and check on your dad?”

  I pause for a moment, wondering what I should do. I don’t want to keep the most important parts of my life separate, but at the same time I still haven’t mentioned Brandon to my dad and I don’t think now is the best time to introduce them. He’s doing well today anyway, so I don’t have to go and see him if I don’t need to.

  “No I’m all done. Let’s just go.” I reach out to his hand to grab it in mine.

  “But your hair is still wet…” His words trail off as I grab hold of my hat. The cowgirl hat that I know he loves. “Okay, fair enough. Let’s get going.”

  As we leave my cottage, I actually grow excited about this trip. I can still tell after all this time, Brandon doesn’t see the positives to the town, he still likes the city so much better and while I don’t think I can change that, I can make him see why I do like it here… even if I feel like I’m in a rut. I want to leave, but I also don’t want to leave.

  “So, this is the famous dump I was telling you about,” I start as I point to a few discarded car and truck tires. “Where we used to buy some foreign, cheap brand beer and drink it until we were sick. Yes, before you ask, even me. I was a bit wild at times.”

  “This isn’t a dump,” Brandon declares with a laugh as he squeezes my hand in his. “But I can picture you as the wild child, leading others into all sorts of trouble.”