When wrong feels so right

by Mia Ford

  “I have something to tell you,” Katy practically whispers as we drive. “I know it might be a bit heavy to discuss now but I feel like I need to get it off my chest.”

  “Okay?” I reply curiously. “To be honest I’d welcome anything to take my mind off things at the moment, so go for it. What’s going on with you?”

  “I’ve made my decision,” she tells me with pride in her tone. I don’t need to look at her to know that she’s smiling, I can just sense it radiating off of her. “I know what I’m going to do now.”

  “You… you do?” My heart leaps up into my throat. This affects me too, whatever she says next has a big impact on how me and Katy will make this work, if we make this work.

  “I do. You see, my main problem is all I can do is law. I don’t know anything else, it’s literally all that I have…” I don’t know if I like the way that this is going. “But I don’t want to continue with the life that I’ve been having. I need to find a way to have some more time.” I see her clench her fists together in excitement. “So… I guess what I’ve decided is to start up my own law firm.”

  “Your own law firm? Are you serious? That’s crazy… but crazy awesome.”

  “I know right, but I’ve been thinking about it and I think it’s the right move for me. I have the right skills and the right connections. It won’t be easy and it might take some work at first, but it’ll be mine so I’ll control the hours and the jobs. I’ll only take on the jobs I want.”

  My heart skips an excitable beat, that’s really great news, she wants to start up a firm so she can work the hours that she wants, so she can work around her life. She can have a life that involves me, and if she ever wants to make things work with me, and move in with me, then she won’t even need to work much because I can take care of her… not that I’m getting carried away here.

  “That sounds awesome, Katy. I’m really proud of you. That’s so great. You’re really taking control of your life and doing what you want. That’s just so brave and amazing.”

  I grab her hand tighter and give her a grin. I really am glad for her, whatever makes her happy, and I really do think that we can see what we are to each other now. That’s all I want in the world.

  “Thank you…” She pauses thoughtfully for a moment. “I wanted you to know first.”

  We drive the rest of the distance in silence, but it’s a happy silence where we’re both lost in our own thoughts. I don’t know what Katy is thinking about, but I’m secretly planning a future inside my mind. I’m seeing me, Katy, and Liam becoming this little cut family that are happy forever more.

  What has happened to me? I can’t help but think. Who have I become?

  If someone had told me a few months ago that I would end up planning a future with a woman I would have screamed with laughter, but then I didn’t know that Katy was about to rock into my life and change absolutely everything for the better. God, I’m so glad to have her. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without her now, my life would be empty without her. She’s amazing.

  Once we arrive at the court house, I park up the car and take a few deep breaths. On the drive down, I thought I would want to go over the speech again and again but now I just want to let it happen. I feel like I’ve rehearsed myself to death and I don’t want to do it anymore.

  “Shall we take a walk?” I turn to ask Katy with a little tremble in my voice. “Maybe take a walk around the block or something? Work off some nerves?”

  “Yeah, sure, whatever you want. Whatever you need to do.”

  Katy pushes herself out of the car and she leaves all the paper work in the car so we can take a walk. She smiles at me happily and waits for me to get ready, but before I can join her, my cell phone blasts out, making me jump with shock it’s so loud.

  Ring, ring… Ring, ring… Ring, ring…

  “Oh, it’s Nancy, one of the nannies,” I tell Katy regretfully. “This might be about Liam so I better just take it. Is that okay? Will you be alright?”

  “Sure,” she indicates towards the car. “You do whatever you need to do. I’ll just wait here. Take as long as you need, okay? I’ll just have a read through the opening statement again.”

  As I walk away from Katy to find somewhere to take the call in private I feel all weird inside. Nancy is one of the better nannies, she never rings me unless she really needs to so this freaks me out. I really don’t need any bad news right now, not before my meeting. I just need to get my head in the game. But if it’s something related to Liam then I have to hear it. It might be important.

  “Hello,” I say shakily. “Nancy, is everything alright?”

  Then she says the statement that’s going to change everything forever…

  Chapter Twenty – Katy

  I glance nervously at the windshield anxiously as an unexpected bolt of ice cold terror circles my heart. I don’t know where it comes from, but it grabs my hard. Ever since Evan’s phone started ringing I had this weird feeling inside and now it’s just culminating into a volcano eruption.

  What’s going in? I ask myself anxiously. Who is he talking to? What’s happening here?

  I quickly tell myself to stop panicking because it’s pointless, it’s probably just my nerves for my upcoming meeting projecting into something else. Just because Evan’s phone has rung doesn’t mean it’s anything to worry about. It could just be someone from his work calling about nothing important, it could just be one of his friends, I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about.

  But then Evan appears in view and the sickness intensifies. He’s pale, almost deathly so, and his hair is all tousled like he’s been pulling at it like there’s no tomorrow. It was something bad on the phone, I just knew it. I could feel it in my bones. Now my bones feel even worse, like glass that could be shattered at any given moment. I’m shaking, trembling, but I push my way out the car to see Evan. I hope this isn’t something new related to the case, I don’t know how we’ll cope with new information but whatever it is I need to keep my cool for Evan. He clearly needs me right now.

  I and race towards him quickly with my heart pounding in my throat. My brain buzzes with anxiety but I push all of that to one side and focus only on his beautiful, tormented face.

  “What’s going on?” I gasp as soon as I reach him. “Are you okay?”

  “It’s Liam,” he whispers back almost staggering as he does. “He’s hurt.”

  Oh fuck, this is much worse than I was expecting. His son is hurt… this is terrifying. I don’t even know what to think. “Liam?” I ask desperately. “What’s happened?”

  He stares at me, dead in the eye, which is the moment that I can see the true unbridled terror there. I understand it, his son is the last person he has in the world. All the rest of his family have been killed in a terrible accident, and now he risks losing the only person that he has left. This is killer.

  “He was in a car crash,” he says as tears ball behind his eyes. “A car crash. Nancy was driving and she isn’t too hurt, but Liam, because he was in the back and he’s so young… he… he… he’s in hospital. He might need surgery and… oh my God, I have to go. I need to be with him.”

  “Oh my God, you go,” I insist right away. “Go and be with him. Check that he’s okay. I’m sure that he’s fine, but yeah you go and check on him.” I watch Evan’s eyes glance towards the court house which should be the least of his problems right now. “I’ll deal with everything here. Honestly, don’t you worry about the meeting, I’ll sort it. You have to be with Liam.”

  “I know.” He tugs his hair once more. “But I need to be at the meeting, they won’t listen if I’m not there. Plus, there’s all that stuff I need to say. We have a plan, we discussed it…”

  This is shock, pure and simple. Evan knows that he needs to be in the hospital with Liam, his brain is just freaking out. He probably can’t process the information about his son. I grab onto his shoulders and try to calm him down by staring deeply into his eyes.

  “Evan, you need
to get to the hospital, okay? You need to check on Liam. This isn’t as important as him, you do realize that, right? I can take care of everything here.”

  “Oh, I know, but my father left me this company and I want to make him proud,” he babbles desperately. “That’s why I’ve worked as hard as I have to keep it going, that’s why I pushed too hard, that’s why I screwed things up. I can’t lose the company because it’s the only legacy that I have of his. It’s important… but I also know that he would want me to be a good father, he was a good father to me. He would want me to be with my son, wouldn’t he?” He looks up and stares at me with nothing but question in his eyes. “He would want me to be with him, wouldn’t he? Don’t you think?”

  “Of course, he would,” I insist. “You have to go. Liam needs you. I will get everything out of the car and I’ll take control of things. I will do what I can at the meeting to protect your father’s legacy okay. You can trust me. You go and make sure that Liam is alright. Your boy needs you.”

  Finally, Evan nods and I drag him towards the car to make him go. He needs me to push him and to take control for once and I’m more than willing to do it. I’m willing to be whatever he needs.

  “Will you promise me that you’ll drive carefully?” I ask as I push him inside. “Don’t go too fast because you’re desperate to be there. You don’t want to have an accident too.”

  “Right,” he rasps back. “Of course. No, I won’t. And will you let me know what’s happened once you come out? If I don’t answer my phone it’s because I’m busy but just… leave me a message..”

  “Of course, I will.” I touch his cheek for just a second so he’ll know that he can trust me. Evan gives me an emotional, barely readable look which is understandable since his child is at risk. I just desperately hope that everything with Liam is okay. “You don’t have to worry about a thing.”

  My heart sinks as I watch the dirt kick up from the back wheels of Evan’s car. There’s no way he’s going to drive sensibly to the hospital. If I didn’t have this meeting to get to, I would have driven him to the hospital, but I know that Evan needs me here most of all. He can’t do both, he can’t split himself into two, so the most useful place that he can be is here.

  I pace outside the court house for a moment, wishing I had someone I could call right now to speak to about this. I suppose I could talk to Robyn, but this is all a bit delicate. It’s Evan’s private life and I really shouldn’t share. Plus, I feel like I’ve put a lot on Robyn, I don’t want to call her with bad news. I can’t wait to tell her about my new life plan, but now isn’t the time for that.

  I sigh deeply, deciding that it’s time to just face the music and get on with it. I might as well go and wait inside until the meeting begins. I’m already in a bit of a bad position, tackling things without my client. I don’t want to add being late to the list as well. Evan was right to worry, they won’t like the fact that he hasn’t turned up, but I’m hoping that once I explain the extenuating circumstances, they’ll just get it and everything will be fine. I don’t have too much hope, banks aren’t exactly known for being big hearted, but I have to try. I have to give it my best shot. I promised Evan.

  As my feet move up the big steps, my head is all over the place. I’m definitely not as centered as I usually am when I face a case like this, but I can’t help myself. I like Liam, he’s a great kid, he doesn’t deserve to be in an accident which has put him in hospital. Evan doesn’t deserve this either, he doesn’t need another car accident in his life, it just isn’t fair. I don’t understand why he’s being punished. It isn’t right, he’s a good person with a kind heart, this is just horrible.

  The idea that he’s about to find Liam in some sickly, damaged condition makes my heart bleed for him. Even for me the thought of that sweet little lad in a white, faceless bed with tubes attached to his body breaks my heart, so I dread to think how Evan is feeling.

  I don’t even get a chance to sit down in the waiting room once I get inside, it seems more time has passed than I thought while outside. I get called into the room right away, a lady in a pencil skirt that’s even starker than mine leads me into a small room with a table in the middle of it, and chairs running up either side. On the opposite side to me a selection of business men in suits all glare at me as if I’m dirt beneath their feet, indicating that I need to sit on the other side.

  Butterflies flap violently in my stomach, reacting far harsher than during any other case I’ve faced before. I think it’s because it’s for Evan, someone that I really care about, someone who trusts me with their livelihood and I don’t want to mess it up.

  “And you are?” one of the men asks me gruffly.

  “Oh, I’m Katy Atwater,” I reply shakily. “I’m the lawyer representing Evan Debroils.”

  “Hmm, I see. And where is Mr. Debroils?” He peers at me over the top of his glasses, looking at me with sheer disgust. “He does realize that this meeting is happening today, doesn’t he? He is here? He does understand how important all of this is, doesn’t he?”

  I shrink in on myself as I answer him because I know he isn’t going to like it. I don’t like taking the wrath for something that’s completely out of my control, but I’ll take a bullet for Evan.

  “No, he isn’t here,” I admit. “But that’s because he just got a call from the hospital and his son has been taken in.” I don’t like being so honest, it feels wrong, but it’s the only way that I’m going to make these people understand. “He might be going into surgery so Evan needs to be there.”

  One of the men leans across to whisper to the other, as if this is something that actually needs to be discussed. As if it isn’t totally obvious that Evan would be at the hospital. So many arguments and expletives race through my mind, but I clasp my hands together and I wring them impatiently.

  Finally, the man who originally spoke to me with a graveness to his tone. “Because of this unprecedented event, we will give two options. Either we have this meet now in the absence of Evan Debroils, or we reschedule.”

  I suck in a deep breath, knowing that the second option isn’t really a possible one since all of the plans me and Evan have made need to be set into motion immediately, plus I don’t think Evan will able to deal with this any time soon, depending on what’s happening with Liam, so while that might be the preferable option, it isn’t the one I can stick with. I have to take the hard road.

  “I would like to do this today,” I say a little breathily. “I have all the paper work and plans with me. I know what Mr. Debroils wants to say. I will speak on his behalf.”

  The men share a glance but then they nod curtly, accepting my decision. I don’t think it’s the one that they want, but that’s tough. I’m taking charge today. I’m in control and there’s nothing they can do about it.

  Now I just need to ensure that I get it right…

  Chapter Twenty One – Evan

  Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God…

  Sickness swirls in my stomach as I race through the hospital doors at the speed of light. I don’t even know how I made it here to the hospital, I drove in such a blur. I don’t know how my brain managed to get the directions right, but somehow, I’m here ready to help my son with whatever needs to happen. I can barely even stand to think about my poor baby, Liam, all hooked up to machines with wires coming out of him everywhere, it kills me. I’ve been through this too many time already, it just isn’t right. I can almost feel Victoria’s hands clamping down on my shoulders, reminding me that our wedding plans killed her and my mom and dad. That was bad enough, this is too much.

  “Liam Debroils,” I shout to the woman sitting behind the reception desk. “I need to know what room he’s in. Liam Debrorils is his name.”

  The lady tuts loudly as she brings her eyes off the computer screen to meet mine. I can instantly tell that she thinks I’m just another hysterical person, like the hundreds of others that she has coming through here every single day, she doesn’t immediately understand that t
his is my whole world on the line here. As her blue eyes pierce my soul, I feel even more panicked and desperate.

  “Sir, there is actually a queue of people waiting to speak to me at the moment, so if you want to go to the back of it I can get to you in time. When it’s your turn.”

  “In the time it took you to say that you could have just told me where my boy is.” I lean over the counter, trying to see her screen as if the answer is magically going to be on there. “My son has been in a car accident today and I need to be with him. Liam Debroils.”

  “Sir, I’m going to have to insist that you get to the back of the queue.”

  “Fuck the queue!” I explode. I turn on my heels to look at the few bored looking people waiting in line. “Look, my son has been in a car crash today, my young boy. Do any of you mind if I just the fucking queue so I can find out what room he’s in from this jobs worth here?” None of them answer me right away, they all just look at me shocked, but eventually a woman nods and the others all follow on like sheep. “See? None of them mind now will you tell me where my son is?”

  “Evan?” Before I can get my answer, I hear the sad voice of Nancy calling out from behind me. “Oh thank goodness, you’re here. You’re here. Do you want to go to the room?”

  I can’t help myself, I’m so freaking wound up I could explode so I flip the bitch woman off as I stalk off. I’m just so pissed that she tried to keep me away from my boy. What sort of person does that? What sort of person sits so high on their horse that they keep a father away from their child?

  “I’m so sorry, Evan,” Nancy weeps as we walk. “I was taking him to the play park, Liam was whining that he wanted to go out, and I didn’t hear the car flying across the intersection, I guess it ran a red light or something, I just… I feel so damn horrible, it hurts.”

  “Nancy, it’s fine. Honestly, I know you wouldn’t do anything to hurt my son.” I can’t really deal with her emotional baggage right now. I don’t think she’s to blame or anything, I just need to focus on Liam and his recovery. “I don’t think it’s your fault, so you can stop worrying.”