She was grateful Eve had been mostly silent on the drive back from Pueblo. She hadn’t wanted to talk about what happened that morning. She didn’t want to relive it. She didn’t want to think about the fact that she had nearly flipped out again.
She pulled on her oldest T-shirt and shorts, then threw the bloodstained clothes into the garbage. She grabbed a soda and went out to the porch, where she could see the lake and mountains and sky, all of which had a soothing effect.
She pondered the question Nate had asked in Stephanie’s van. Had the scholarship been worth the years she’d spent in the army? That wasn’t exactly the way he’d formed the question but it was what she thought he’d meant.
After the attack, she had asked herself that question over and over again. Without the scholarship, she might never have become a nurse. Never gone overseas. Never saved a life. Never fallen in love. Everything had been intense during those years. Intense training. Intense satisfaction in saving a life. Intense fear. Intense love. Intense grief.
She sighed. Part of her missed the adrenaline that surged when a copter landed with the wounded. The flush of victory when the team saved a life or limb. But then there were the failures...
Then she remembered she’d promised to call Sara Monroe. She went back inside and punched in the number. The maid answered the phone. Andy identified herself and asked for Mrs. Monroe. She came on immediately.
“Miss Stuart. Thank you for calling. How is Nate?”
“Please call me Andy,” she said and repeated what the doctor had said.
“Thank you for calling,” Mrs. Monroe said. “I know it’s late today, but would you like to reschedule our meeting for 2:00 p.m. tomorrow afternoon? I’ve been looking through letters and other documents.”
“I would like that,” Andy replied, trying to infuse enthusiasm in her words. At the moment, she was tapped out of enthusiasm.
“I’ll have tea ready,” Mrs. Monroe said. “Or would you prefer coffee?”
Andy thought the latter was an afterthought. She was a coffee person through and through, but she was a guest. “Tea will be fine.”
“I’ll see you then, and I’m so pleased about Nate. I’ll tell Al.”
Duty done, she went back outside. She sat in the swing and stared out at the mountain. She wondered whether it had a name, had ever had a name or was merely a part of the San Juan mountain range.
Images of the morning flickered through her head even as she tried to block them. She didn’t want to think of the blood when she’d reached Nate, the way she had almost lapsed into a flashback or how frantically her heart had beaten when she didn’t know how badly he was hurt.
How could that be? She barely knew him. She remembered him as he’d been when she left the community center last night. Tall, strong, competent. She had been drawn to him even as she’d tried her best to draw away. She’d felt disloyal to Jared. She still felt that way. She couldn’t get away from the fact that she lived because he’d died. He’d taken the bullet a second before armed guards had rushed in and killed the attacker.
She swallowed hard.
“Come on, Joseph,” she said.
He brought his leash to her and they walked out. She didn’t bother to lock the door. If there had ever been a safe place, Covenant Falls seemed to be it. Not that she had anything to steal.
It was dark, but a part moon lit the night enough to follow the road. She walked down Lake Road to the beckoning lights in the park and sat on one of the swings. There were others in the park. A woman pushed a boy on a swing. A couple sat on a bench facing the lake. Young. Fresh faced. They were holding hands and leaning against each other.
She’d never had young love. She’d been too different in high school, too busy in college and too careful in the service. Sure, she’d dated, but no one had clanged the bells. And then she’d joined Jared’s team. At first she’d been wary. Fraternization was frowned upon, and Jared was all business...
She chewed on her lip as she stood there like a member of an audience staring at a play. An onlooker, not a participant. She’d been kept so busy since arriving here, she hadn’t had time to think, to remember. She had gone several days without mourning Jared, but now grief hit her like repeated blows to her midsection.
Joseph bumped her and offered his paw. “You’re right, Joseph,” she said. “It’s time to look ahead.” They left the park lights and walked back to the cabin. She would choose a book tonight and read. And hope the blood this morning would not bring on the nightmares.
* * *
NATE DRIFTED IN and out during the day. His leg hurt like hell. At least he’d been assured that no permanent damage had been done. The doctor said he might need crutches for a few days. He supposed he’d been lucky.
It was a freakish accident, one he felt he would never live down. Falling off a damn ladder. Years ago, he would not have been caught off balance. He feared it was because his mind had not been on the job.
If he hadn’t concentrated so hard on keeping awake in the ambulance and if he hadn’t hurt from head to toe, he might even have enjoyed Andy’s attention during the drive to the hospital.
“Nathan?”
He looked up at his mother. “You don’t need to stay,” he said. “The doctor said I’m fine.”
“Sorry, but he didn’t say that. He said he wanted to observe you for a few days. I’m simply helping him do that.”
He knew that look. He gave up. “Could you get me something to read?”
“Magazines? A book?”
“Whatever they have downstairs. And get something to eat. Okay? I’ll be fine with all the nurses around here.”
“That Miss Stuart sure is pretty. And nice,” she said slyly.
“Don’t go dreaming up a romance, Mom. You know how I feel about that. And she’s not going to be here long.”
“Like your friends Josh and Clint?” she replied with a twinkle in her eyes.
“She’s hurting, Mom, and two hurts don’t heal each other. They just make for a bigger one,” he said, not bothering to deny the pain his ex-wife had caused him. “You go home, Mom,” he said. “I promise I won’t try to escape.”
She left then, and he lay back. His mother was right in one respect. It was time to let go. It wasn’t that he still loved his ex-wife, although he had, or thought he had, in the beginning. It was all the betrayals...
They had colored all subsequent relationships. He simply was unable to trust again especially when the woman seemed—or was—in need of help. He helped, then usually ran as fast as he could in the other direction. That defense mechanism didn’t seem to be working with Andy.
He turned on the television, checking to see whether the world was still spinning. It was. The offerings were sparse, however, and his mind turned back—once more—to Andy. Blood splattered and all, she was one of the most appealing faces he’d seen. He didn’t think he would ever forget the intensity in those gray eyes as she demanded he stay awake.
He remembered until the meds kicked in and he drifted off to sleep.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
THE SOUND OF gunfire erupted outside the operating tent. The team stopped in midmovement as if caught in a movie that had suddenly frozen in place.
Everyone but Jared, who was reconstructing a leg.
Khalid burst into the room, a gun in his hands and an expression she had never seen before on his face. He didn’t say anything, just swung the automatic from one of the operating team to another, firing with rapidity, then toward her as if they hadn’t just exchanged words about his family thirty minutes earlier.
Jared stepped in front and she felt the splash of blood...
Andy woke screaming. Joseph was whining and pawing at her with his foot. She was trembling and sweating and could barely breathe. She clung to the dog until she could breathe normally again.
But when she looked at her hands, they still shook.
Joseph snuggled close, his tongue frantically trying to lick her. She buried her hands in his fur. Comforted by his unconditional love, she didn’t move. Her shaking finally stopped as the last of the recurring nightmare faded away.
The result of yesterday’s accident? She knew from experience she wouldn’t go back to sleep. She padded to the kitchen to make coffee. It was still dark outside.
She wrapped a blanket around her and took the coffee to the porch. Nights were still cool, but she didn’t want to stay within four walls where she felt...trapped.
The moon was nearly full and glimmers of light touched the mountains. Grasshoppers chirped but it seemed the rest of the world was silent. No planes arriving or taking off. No alarm declaring incoming wounded. No sandstorms or freezing nights and hell-hot days.
Then her thoughts turned to Jared. She hoped he was playing cards in heaven and keeping the angels busy.
He’d been smart, funny and ambitious. Like her, he’d traded years in the army and—it turned out—his life to become a doctor. He had been due to leave the service at the end of that last deployment.
Until they had fallen in love, she’d planned to stay in the service. She’d liked the challenges of military medicine. She especially liked the comradery of the entire team. They ate together, worked together and played together. Because she liked her job, she’d always been very careful never to get involved with a teammate.
But Jared had courted her from the time they had met. She had resisted until he asked her to go with him to a village to hold a children’s clinic. He’d brought toys and supplies that he’d purchased with his own money. When other members of the team had discovered what he was doing, they all pitched in.
Watching him with children had melted every one of her defenses, and they’d started spending even more time together. Four weeks before the shooting he had asked her to marry him when their deployments ended...
She took a sip of coffee. It was cold. She’d been out here longer than she thought. She realized this was the first time she could think of Jared with a smile rather than intense grief.
The rising sun was sending streams of gold across the mountaintops, and her thoughts went back to Nate in the hospital. She wondered how he was faring this morning. Hurting but probably restless. He never seemed to stay still.
She remembered their conversation in Stephanie’s van. They’d both probably said things they usually wouldn’t say until they knew each other a lot better. She had been doing her best to keep him awake and in doing so had said more than she intended. She suspected he had done the same.
Divorced? The worst mistake he’d ever made? He was good-looking in a rugged way. He was obviously smart and easy to be with. He’d studied architecture but hadn’t finished. Was that part of the mistake?
She went inside and helped herself to another cup of coffee. Joseph looked hopefully at the front door. “Shower first,” she said, “then walk.” His tail wagged eagerly.
She took a long shower, then looked at her laughable wardrobe options. Top of her list today was that shopping trip that had been interrupted yesterday. In the meantime, she resorted to an elderly T-shirt and jeans. When she finished dressing, she toasted two slices of bread and fixed Joseph breakfast. It disappeared in seconds.
What time did the stores open? Nine? Ten? She made a list of things she needed. Clothes. She wanted to see if any of the stores had a tablet or laptop that was affordable. Otherwise she would have to drive to Pueblo.
Nate was in Pueblo.
Better if you stay away, she warned herself.
Joseph nudged her. He had his leash in his mouth.
“Okay,” she said. “A long walk.”
They walked past the community center. Not open yet. No one was in the park, either. There were a few cars driving through town. Cars were parked around Maude’s. She noticed that Eve’s pickup was parked in front of city hall.
She walked by the real estate office. The lights were on but she didn’t see anyone inside. Maybe Al was in the back.
The general store was closed, but she peered in. A tall, full-bodied woman was walking around inside. She looked up, then hurried over to the door and unlocked it.
“You must be Andy Stuart,” she said. “Haven’t heard of any other new folks in town.”
“I am,” Andy said. “Are you closed?”
“Putting in new stock, but if you need something, you just come on in. I heard how you took care of Nate yesterday. Is he all right?”
“The doctors are keeping him a few days, but everything looks good. Can I bring Joseph inside?”
“Sure. No one here but me,” the woman said. “I’m Heather. My husband owns the store. He’ll be in later. What can I do for you?”
“Shirts and pants, mostly.”
“Blouses and shirts are on the left rack in back. Pants and skirts in the middle. Dresses on the right, although we don’t have many in your size. You’ll find T-shirts and jeans on the tables. There’s also shorts. I’ll just leave you to look while I go do some paperwork.”
Andy was startled at the selection. The dresses were obviously aimed at the older citizens in town, but the shirts were both fashionable and reasonably priced. She found three she liked, along with two simple T-shirts and three pairs of pants: blue, black and gray. She’d discovered long ago they were the foundation of any wardrobe.
“Do you have any laptops?” she said.
“We have a few,” Heather said. “They’re fine, but the internet is still pretty spotty around here. I doubt it’s available at the cabin, although we do have it at the community center.”
Andy glanced at the selection, then decided to use the ones at the community center. She could always write in longhand at home.
With packages in her arms, she decided to head back to the cabin. She passed the Presbyterian church and stopped to read the historical marker in front: Founded by Angus Monroe, 1865.
She looked at the church. It was a pretty white building with a tall steeple and bell. The architecture was simple with clean lines. It did not look like 1865.
The doors were open and on a whim she decided to go inside.
An older, nice-looking man approached her. He held out his hand. “I’m Reverend Barrett, the pastor here. Welcome. What can I do for you?”
“Hello. I’m Andy Stuart. I’m staying in the Manning cabin, and I wondered if you can help me. I saw the marker outside, and Mrs. Rowland said you have Angus Monroe’s Bible.”
He smiled. “Obviously this building isn’t the one that he had built. That burned down in 1950. But the church family remained and this building was constructed on the same ground as the original, so we still claim him. And yes, we do have his Bible here. Al Monroe’s grandmother gave it to us for safekeeping after the fire. We now have it in an airtight, fireproof safe. You are welcome to look at it as long as someone is with you.”
“Is someone available now?”
“I am, for the next hour. The safe is in our library, and I can work on my sermon while you look at it.”
“Thank you,” she said.
“I’m happy someone is interested in the Bible.” He led the way out of the sanctuary and down the hall to a room lined with books. There were several tables along with chairs.
He opened up a cabinet and then the safe. Reverently, he took out a weathered-looking Bible. “This came from Scotland. It was the family Bible dating back to the 1700s. It’s the one thing he held on to during the trek west.”
The minister placed the Bible on a table, opened it and pointed to an entry. “This is Angus’s first entry in this country. You might start there.”
He left it with her and went to another table, where he worked on a laptop.
She stared down at the h
andwriting. There was a flourish to every letter, but it was surprisingly readable.
Died: Liam Monroe this 7th day of April, 1849, of drowning. God keep his soul.
The next entry was happier.
Wedded: Angus Monroe to Chiweta this 20th day of August, 1852.
Born: of Chiweta and Angus Monroe, a daughter, Lorna, this 15th day of July, 1853.
Born: of Chiweta and Angus Monroe, a daughter, Jenna, this 6th day of May, 1854.
Born: of Chiweta and Angus Monroe, a son, Liam, this 5th day of April, 1856.
Died: Chiweta Monroe, this 5th day of April, 1856.
There was nothing after that.
“I wonder why there’s no entries after the last one,” she said.
“I’ve wondered that myself. You might ask the family.”
She closed the Bible and stood. “Thank you,” she said.
“Come and see me again,” he said. “You’re invited to the services.”
She just nodded her head. Since Jared died, she’d not attended a church service.
She and Joseph left. She looked at her watch. It only eleven. Her appointment at the Monroes’ was at two. She didn’t want to go to Maude’s. There would be too many questions about Nate.
She and Joseph headed toward the cabin. They had gone halfway when Bill Evans pulled up in a car. “You look loaded. Can I give you a lift?”
She nodded. The package of clothes was getting heavier with every step, and not being able to use her left hand made it awkward.
She opened up the back door and Joseph hopped in, then she stepped in the front passenger seat.
“Going home from the looks of it,” he said.
Home. She still didn’t consider it that.
She nodded.
“I hear you helped Nate yesterday. Whole town is grateful. I checked with the doc this morning. He said reports from the hospital were good.”
“They’re still keeping him there for a day or two.”
“Knowing Nate, I’m surprised they didn’t have to tie him down, but I’m not surprised he was helping Mrs. Byars.”
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