by Diana Palmer
He stared at her. “You?”
“Because I write what I write,” she added. “It’s important.”
“No, I don’t think you’re scandalous,” he said honestly and smiled. “I think you’re extremely talented, and your books are a joy to read.”
“You don’t think I lead a wild life?”
He only laughed. “No, I don’t. What’s wrong? Are you getting unpleasant letters again?”
“Oh, no. It’s…” She sighed and propped her chin on her hand. “It’s Egan.”
“Please, don’t spoil a perfect evening,” he said with a restless movement. “He has a glare that could stop a clock.”
“Tell me about it,” she muttered. “He’s giving me fits about what I write.”
“Doesn’t he realize the difference between fiction and fact?”
“Not if he doesn’t want to,” she said with a short laugh. “Egan makes up his rules as he goes along. He’s a law unto himself out West.”
“I got that idea, all right.” He studied her sad face and reached out impulsively to pat her hand. “He’ll leave after Christmas,” he said bracingly.
“Roll on, New Year,” she murmured, and sighed as she sipped her coffee.
They went dancing after dinner, and for a while Kati forgot all her troubles. She drew interested glances in the black dress she was wearing. It had a peasant bodice with a full, swirling skirt, and left her creamy shoulders bare. With her hair in a high coiffure, and a minimum of makeup, she wore the designer gown with a flair.
She felt on top of the world, until she went into the apartment and found Egan waiting in the hall.
“Where’s lover boy?” he asked, glaring past her at the closed door. “Doesn’t he come in for a nightcap?”
He was wearing a dress shirt rolled up to the elbows and half unbuttoned in front, with his black slacks. Obviously, he hadn’t spent the evening at home, either, and his proprietary air irritated Kati even more. She was still fuming from last night.
“He doesn’t wear a nightcap,” she said with sweet venom, “and I don’t lend mine.”
His chin lifted at an arrogant angle and he looked at her long and hard, his dark eyes narrowing on her bare shoulders.
Self-conscious with him, she hunched her shoulders so that the elastic top came back into place, demurely covering everything south of her collarbone.
“Shy of me?” he asked quietly, moving forward.
She felt like running. Where was Ada, for heaven’s sake? She couldn’t get past him to her room to save her life, and she knew it.
“Where’s Ada?” she asked quickly.
“In her room, talking to Marshal,” he said. “Why? You’re a big girl, now; you don’t need protecting, do you?”
Oh, yes, she did, but obviously she couldn’t count on her best friend tonight.
She felt the impact of his rough, warm hands—with a sense of fatalism. Her body jerked under the sensation as he deliberately began to slide the fabric away from her shoulders and down.
“Isn’t this how you had it?” he breathed, bending. His chest rose and fell roughly, and she drowned in the warmth of his body.
“Egan…” she began.
“Don’t talk. Stand still.” His mouth smoothed over her shoulder, leaving a fiery wake. His fingers held her upper arms, digging in as his teeth nipped slowly, tenderly at the silken flesh.
“Don’t,” she moaned, eyes closed, throat arching as if it invited him—begged him—to do what he pleased.
“You want it,” he whispered huskily. “So do I. Desperately…!” She felt his tongue and the edge of his teeth as he moved over the warm expanse of her shoulders and her collarbone in a silence blazing with promise.
His breath sounded oddly jerky as he drew her body against him. “You taste like the sweetest kind of candy,” he said under his breath, and his fingers were hurting, but she was too shaken to care. “Baby,” he whispered, his mouth growing urgent now as it found her throat, the underside of her chin. His hands moved up to catch in her hair, careless of its neat bun, as he bent her head back and lifted it toward his hard, parted lips. “Baby, you make me ache…!”
His mouth was poised just above hers, and at that moment she’d have given him that and anything else he wanted. But before he could lower his head, the sound of a door being opened shattered the hot silence.
“Oh, damn,” Egan ground out. His fingers bruised her, and his eyes were blazing as he pushed her away and turned as if he were blinded by his own passion—a frustrated passion like that which was making her tremble.
“Marshal’s sick of the sea, but they won’t let him come home,” Ada sighed, oblivious to the wild undercurrents around her. “Why couldn’t I find myself a man instead of a sailor? Hi, Kati. Have a good time?”
“Sure,” Kati said, smiling through a haze of unsatisfied longing. She glanced toward Egan and saw his eyes, and she flushed wildly. Her eyes went to his mouth and back up; and he muttered something terrible under his breath and slammed into his room without even the pretense of courtesy.
“What’s the matter with him?” Ada asked softly.
“Beats me,” her friend replied blandly. “Gosh, I’m tired. We went dancing and my feet are killing me!”
“Well, I hope you don’t wear them out before Friday night,” Ada laughed. “Sleep well.”
“I’ll do my best,” came the muttered reply, and she went into her room and almost collapsed. He hadn’t even kissed her, and she was trembling like a leaf. Heaven only knew what would happen if he ever really made a heavy pass. She couldn’t bear to think about it! She went to bed and lay awake half the night brooding, only to wake with a splitting headache the next morning.
Egan brooded all day. He moved restlessly around the apartment, like a man aching for the outdoors. Even Kati felt vaguely sorry for him.
“You’ll wear ruts in the carpet,” she murmured after lunch, while Ada was taking her turn at the dishes.
He turned with his hands rammed deep in his pockets and stared at her. “If I do, I’ll buy you a new one.”
“That wasn’t what I meant,” she said, trying hard to hold on to her temper. She searched his hard face, but she couldn’t quite meet his eyes. “You hate being indoors, don’t you?”
“With a passion,” he agreed shortly. “I couldn’t live like this.”
“New York is full of things to see,” she suggested. “There’s Central Park, and the Statue of Liberty, the Empire State Building—”
“I’ve already seen them once,” he said. “And I’ve walked the streets. What I want, I’m not going to find out there.”
She lifted her eyes and had them trapped.
He moved closer so quickly that she hardly saw him coming before he was towering over her. “I want you,” he said, his voice like warm velvet in the sudden silence of the room. “I’m through pretending.”
“Well, I don’t…I don’t want you,” she said in a breathless little voice. “I have a boyfriend—”
“No competition whatsoever,” he returned. “What are you afraid of? I’m not brutal in bed. I wouldn’t hurt you.”
She flushed deeply, and just stopped herself from slapping him. “I liked it better when you hated me,” she said angrily, glaring up at him.
His eyes searched hers. “Was it ever that?”
Her lips parted, but before she could find an answer, Ada was through with the dishes and Kati stuck to her like glue until it was time to leave for dinner that evening.
Jack grinned as he saw Kati in her burgundy velvet dress. “What a dish,” he murmured. “And I like your hair down like that.”
“Thank you. You aren’t bad yourself. Jack, you know Marshal,” she said, indicating the tall, dark young man beside Ada.
“Sure.” Jack extended his hand. “Good to see you again.”
“Same here,” Marshal replied. He hugged Ada close. “I still love the sea, but sometimes I get a little hungry for the shore.”
 
; “I can imagine. Uh, wasn’t your brother supposed to join us?” Jack asked Ada with evident reluctance.
“He’s meeting us at the Rainbow Grill,” Ada said. “And I made reservations in advance.”
“Good girl,” Jack said. He took Kati’s arm. “Well, let’s get it over with,” he murmured under his breath.
“It will be all right,” she promised as Ada and Marshal fell back. “We can have the waiter pour wine over his head if he starts anything.”
“You don’t think he would?” Jack asked, horrified.
She patted his arm. He wasn’t the type for public scenes, although Kati wouldn’t have minded dousing Egan any old where at all. “No, I don’t,” she promised. “Don’t worry. Everything will be fine.”
She was to remember those words vividly a little later, when Egan joined them at their table overlooking the colorful lights of the city sixty-five floors down. He had on his arm a windblown little blonde who looked and dressed like a woman who loved money, and her first glance at the other women was like a declaration of war.
“So this is Ada,” the blonde gushed, heading straight for Kati.
“Wrong woman,” Kati said shortly. “That’s Ada.”
The blonde shrugged, gave a careless smile and turned to greet a highly amused Ada. “So you’re Ada. How nice to meet you at last. I’ve just heard so much about you from Egan. We’ve known each other for a long time, you know. He calls me every time he gets to New York. I’m a model.”
As if that didn’t stick out a mile, Kati thought as the blonde sat down near her and almost choked her with expensive perfume.
“Isn’t this the most gorgeous place?” the blonde enthused. “I love the atmosphere. And isn’t the combo great?”
Kati couldn’t say. She hadn’t been able to hear them play, or hear their sultry-voiced vocalist sing, for the newcomer. And just as she was wondering how she’d eat because of the perfume, Egan slid into the seat beside her and ruined her appetite completely.
“Jennie Winn, this is Katriane James and her date,” Egan volunteered.
Kati glared at him. “Jack Asher,” she supplied.
“Nice to meet you, I’m sure,” Jennie murmured. “What do you do, Mr. Asher?” she asked Jack and batted her impossibly long eyelashes at him.
He perked up immediately, the turncoat. “I’m a political columnist, for the Times,” he said.
Jennie beamed. “Are you, really? Oh, I just adore intelligent men.”
Kati had to muffle a giggle with her napkin. Really, she was behaving impossibly, but that blonde couldn’t be for real!
“Something amuses you, Miss James?” Egan asked with ice in his tone.
She got herself under control. “I got strangled, Mr. Winthrop,” she managed.
“On what? The air?”
“Now, Egan, honey,” Jennie crooned, glaring past him at Kati. “You just relax, and later I’ll take you back to my place and soothe you.”
Kati bit almost through her lip to keep from howling. She didn’t dare look at Egan—it would have been the very end.
“Jennie, look at the menu,” Egan said curtly.
“Whatever you say, sugar.”
“I want the beef Wellington,” Ada said. “How about you, Kati?”
“Do they serve goose here?” Egan asked under his breath.
“If they do,” Kati replied with a venomous smile, “yours is probably sizzling on the grill right now, sugar.”
He glared at her and she glared back at him. Sensing disaster, Jack quickly intervened.
“Kati, didn’t you want to try that duckling in orange sauce?”
She tore her eyes away from Egan’s and smiled across the table. “Yes, I did.”
By then the waiter was back, elegant in his white jacket, to take their order. By and large, Kati loved New York waiters. They had a certain flair and grace of manner that set them apart, and they were unfailingly polite and kind.
“I want prime rib,” Jennie said nonchalantly. “Rare, honey.”
“A woman after my own heart,” Egan murmured. “I’ll have the same.”
Kati wanted to mutter something about barbarism, but she kept her mouth shut with an effort. And when the food came, she was far too involved in savoring every morsel to waste time on Egan Winthrop.
But the coffee and dessert came, eventually, and while Kati toyed with her superb English trifle, Egan leaned back and eyed Jack.
“I read your column on the Washington scandal,” he told the younger man.
“Did you?” Jack asked with a polite smile.
“Interesting, about the deficit in the agency’s budget,” he continued. “Apparently your man was allocating funds on paper that never reached the recipients. The audacity of politicians constantly amazes me, and so does the apathy of the public.”
Jack perked up. “Yes. What I can’t understand is how he expected to get away with it,” he said, forgetting his dessert as he went into the subject.
Egan matched him, thought for thought, and the ensuing conversation fascinated Kati. She listened raptly, along with everyone else at the table except Jennie—who looked frankly bored to death.
“You know a hell of a lot about politics for a rancher, Mr. Winthrop,” Jack said finally, on a laugh.
“I took my degree in political science” came the cool reply. “Ranching pretty much chose me, rather than the other way around. When my father died, there was Ada and my mother to look after, and no one else to assume control of the property. There was a lot of it.” He shrugged. “The challenge is still there,” he added with a smile. “Cattle are a lot like politics, Mr. Asher. Unpredictable, hard to manage and sometimes just plain damned frustrating.”
Jack laughed. “I imagine so.”
“Oh, can’t we stop talking about such boring things?” Jennie asked in a long-suffering tone. “I want to go to the theater, and we’ve got tickets to that hit musical on Broadway. We’ll be late if you talk all night.”
Egan gave her a look that would have stopped traffic.
Jennie flushed and cleared her throat. “I mean, whenever you’re ready, sugar,” she said placatingly.
Kati lifted her chin with faint animosity. She’d have told him where to go, instead of pleading with him like that. He knew it, too. Because he glanced at her and caught the belligerent gleam in her eye, and something wild and heady flashed between them when he smiled at her.
Her lips trembled, and she grabbed her coffee cup like a shield.
“See you later,” Egan told them, picking up the tabs. “My treat. I enjoyed the discussion,” he told Jack.
Before anyone could thank him, he and Jennie were gone and Jack was shaking his head.
“And I thought he hated me. My God, what a mind. He’s wasted out West.”
Ada beamed. “He was offered an ambassadorship, did you know?” she asked. “He knows everybody in Washington, right to the top. But he turned it down because of mother and me. Since then, he’s given everything to the ranch.”
“Not quite everything,” Marshal murmured. “His girl was a knockout.”
“I’d have liked to knock her out,” Kati muttered, flushing at Ada’s shocked look. “Well, she must have bathed in perfume; I could hardly breathe,” she said defensively.
But Ada only grinned, and Kati hated that knowing look. So she was jealous! She caught her breath. She was jealous? Of Egan? She picked up the untouched wineglass and helped herself.
Egan wasn’t home when they finally got back to the apartment, and Kati could just picture him with that sizzling blonde. It made her ache in the oddest way. She took a shower and got ready for bed and then paced and paced around her room.
“Is something bothering you?” Ada asked minutes later, coming in to check on her. It wasn’t like Kati to pace. “You’re getting to be as bad as Egan about wearing ruts in the carpets.”
Kati lifted her shoulders helplessly, grabbing at the ribbon strap that kept sliding off. The green gown was far to
o big, but she liked its roominess. “I’m just restless.”
Ada studied her friend quietly. “He’s a man,” she said softly.
Kati blushed all the way down her throat and turned away.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that,” Ada said hesitantly. “But, you see, I can’t help noticing the way you look at him. And the way he looks back. Normal people don’t fight like the two of you do. Anything that explosive has to…well, there has to be something pretty powerful to cause it, don’t you see?”
“I hate him,” Kati said through her teeth. “That’s powerful, all right.”
“But you want him.”
Kati’s eyes closed. “Tomorrow is Christmas,” she said. “The day after, he’ll go back to Wyoming and I’ll go back to my sordid books, and we’ll both be better off. There’s no future with your brother for any woman, Ada, and you know it.” She turned around, her face stiff with control. “He’s not the happily-ever-after kind.”
Ada looked worried. “He says that, but no man really wants to get married, does he? It kind of takes the right woman.”
Kati laughed huskily. “A woman like Jennie. She suits him just fine, doesn’t she?” she asked venomously.
Ada shook her head. “She numbs the hurt, that’s all. He’s a lonely man.”
“He got hurt once and never wants to be again, is that how it goes?” Kati asked.
“I don’t think Egan can be hurt, Kati,” came the soft reply. “He doesn’t let anyone close enough. I know less than nothing about his private life. But I think he’s more involved with you right now than he’s ever been before.”
“He’s never touched me,” she bit off.
“Yes, I know. I didn’t mean physically,” Ada said. “I mean emotionally. Don’t you realize that’s why he hits at you so hard?”
“He hits at me because he wants me,” she told the other woman bluntly. “He said so. He thinks I’m easy.”
Ada looked horrified. “Well, did you tell him the truth?”
“Of course not! I don’t owe your horrible brother any explanations—Let him just keep his disgusting image of me!”
Ada frowned slightly. “Kati, he isn’t a man to let go of something he sets his mind on. I think you’d better tell him.”