He was almost up the steps of the trailer when Duke stopped him, “Hey, Brody.”
He turned, waited.
“Oregon said that Grace cried herself to sleep last night. Did you do that?”
Brody rubbed a hand across his jaw. He really needed to shave. And make things up to Grace. “Yeah, probably,” he admitted.
“You should know pregnant women cry a lot. They get their feelings hurt easily.”
“How would...?” He stopped himself from saying something about his brother not being there when Oregon was pregnant. “I’ll make it up to her.”
“That would be real good of you.”
Brody leaned against the door frame. “Duke?”
“What?” Duke stood in the yard. Brody’s dog was on its hind legs, scratching at his pant legs.
“I wish it was my baby. That makes me madder than anything. When I touched her belly last night and felt that little person in there kick my hand, I wanted that baby to be mine. I’m furious that it’s Lincoln’s.”
“I get that, Brody. I guess you just have to...”
“Pray. Yeah, I know. I’ve been praying night and day. I’m not sure God is hearing me, because I still don’t have an answer. The last time I thought I had an answer, I bought a ring. We all know how that turned out.”
“Yeah, we know. It ended with you coming home madder than a bear with a thorn in his paw.”
“I’ll be down in an hour.” He whistled for his dog and went inside to get ready.
When he pulled up to Jake’s, there was a full house, and a truck with a snazzy horse trailer parked outside. He knew that trailer. It belonged to Grace’s Aunt Jacki. It had living quarters, room for three horses and air conditioning. Not only did Jacki travel in style, but so did her horses.
He headed for the house, stopping to pet Lilly’s dog. When he stepped onto the front porch, the door opened. Grace stood in the doorway, her smile hesitant. She was wearing a pretty skirt and a T-shirt. Her hair was held back from her face and her eyes looked huge. And still a little red. Guilt edged in and he tamped it down.
“How are you?” she asked, protective hand on her belly.
“Is he kicking?”
“No. I’m just a little sore. I have an appointment Monday.”
“I’ll drive you,” he offered, really hoping she’d take him up on it. And then hoping she wouldn’t.
“I’ll think about it.”
“Jacki is here.” Needless words. She knew her aunt was there.
“She brought my gelding, Doc. I’m going to keep him here until I decide my next move. I can’t stay with Oregon forever.”
“She’s going to move out soon. You can probably stay there as long as you want.”
He felt it between them, the tension, the need to say more. But he wasn’t ready. He guessed she wasn’t, either. Maybe neither of them knew what it was they wanted to say.
“I’m sorry about last night.”
“Who told you?” She joined him on the porch, slowly closing the door behind her.
“Oregon told Duke. He said something to me.” He eased closer, inhaled the sweet scent of her perfume. She was springtime and sunshine. He needed her close. He didn’t deserve her, though.
“Brody, I’m tired of hurting and it seems as though that’s all we do—hurt each other.”
The words stunned him. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I know. And I don’t want to hurt you, either.”
He leaned in close, letting his lips graze her cheek. “I know. I didn’t mean to hurt you last night.”
She nodded, her forehead touching his chest, resting there. He leaned, kissed the top of her head. “We should go in,” he said, regretting that they were here and not somewhere alone where they could talk.
“I know.”
He reached for the doorknob, but stopped as a car roared up the drive and pulled in to the parking space behind his truck. The cherry-red convertible blasted rock music. The woman behind the steering wheel had long dark hair pulled back. Sunglasses perched on a pert nose. She stepped out of the car and looked around, and he knew immediately who she was.
“Who invited Kayla Stanford?” he asked as he watched her walk toward the house.
“Is that who that is?”
He watched her head their way. “I’m guessing.”
“No one invited her, that I know of. She did say she was going to visit. She seems to know how to make an entrance.”
“I’d say so,” Brody agreed.
“I think Martin’s Crossing is in trouble.”
“Is this the Martin ranch?” the young woman asked as she stepped up on the porch, all confidence and style. The kind that came from growing up privileged.
But something in her gray eyes made the outward appearance seem like a lie.
“It sure is,” Brody responded, holding out a hand. “Brody Martin.”
“Kayla Stanford. I guess you’re my brother.” She gave him a winning smile and Brody silently agreed with Grace. They were all in big trouble. This young woman in her knee-length yoga pants, T-shirt and designer sunglasses was not at all what they’d expected.
Brody took a few seconds to let it settle in. “I’m not even sure what to say in this situation.”
“Yeah, that’s how I’ve been feeling, too,” she admitted. “I was led to believe my mother had never been married. She had me, dropped me with my dad and flew the coop.”
“She’s an expert at flying the coop,” Brody informed her. “But not at raising kids.”
He led her inside to the rest of the family. Party horns sounded as they headed for the kitchen. He led Grace and Kayla to the big room where the family was gathered. That included Marty, their housekeeper, cook and mother figure. Her eyes widened when she saw Kayla. The horn blowing stopped.
“Happy birthday!” Lilly’s greeting fizzled as everyone looked from him to Kayla.
“Surprise!” Brody half shouted and waved his arms. “It’s a sister.”
Kayla stood in the middle of their rowdy group, chewing on her lip. Brody put a hand on her arm and she half smiled up at him.
“Let me introduce you to everyone,” he offered. It never should have been like this. People didn’t get introduced to siblings. He couldn’t help but be mad at Sylvia all over again. She’d abandoned them all without a thought toward their futures or how they’d find each other.
He had a real feeling that Kayla Stanford had needed to find them. And being the family they were, they pulled her in, talking, asking questions, letting her be part of them.
And standing at the edge of their family was Grace.
“Do you have other family?” Breezy asked later as she served the white cake that looked like a Maltese. He couldn’t figure out how they’d all thought he needed a dog cake for his twenty-seventh birthday. There had been years as a kid that he’d been okay with cream-filled snack cakes all lined up in a pan and candles on top. Jake and Elizabeth had made them.
Kayla took a bite of the cake and answered Breezy’s question. “My dad, stepmother and two half brothers.”
It was something Brody hadn’t known about her.
“You have a great car,” Lilly observed.
Kayla smiled. “Thank you.”
The conversation drifted again. Jake questioned Kayla about school. About how she spent her time. Brody kept quiet because they all knew how she spent her time. Creating headlines in Austin. She was her father’s wild child. It was hard to figure that out now that he’d met her.
“I’m going to walk Aunt Jacki out. She’s leaving.” Grace stood, picking up her empty plate.
Brody took the plate from her hand. “I’ll get these.”
“You’re sweet, Brody.”
“Don
’t let that get out or they’ll all start expecting some miraculous transformation,” he teased.
She touched his cheek, her fingers barely caressing the skin. “I won’t tell.”
Why did he have a strange feeling they were close to saying another goodbye?
* * *
Grace walked across the yard with her aunt. She’d shown up without notice, but that was okay. Jacki was notorious for drifting whichever way the wind blew. She was turning forty this year and she said she had a lot of adventures to take before she settled down.
When they got to her truck, Jacki pointed to the open tailgate. “Sit.”
Grace obeyed. Jacki sat next to her.
“Why didn’t you tell me Lincoln was abusing you?” Jacki started with the conversation that had probably been eating at her all day.
“I don’t know.” Grace held her hand out to the border collie that had joined them. The dog licked her fingers and then plopped in the shade of the truck, stretching out to sleep. “I guess I was embarrassed. I’m not a woman who gets abused, right? I’m educated. I’m from a good family. It doesn’t happen.”
Jacki let out a sigh. “Oh, honey, it happens. I was married for two years to a man who thought I was his personal punching bag. I just never saw it in Lincoln, and I’m sorry.”
“It wasn’t your fault. I’m starting to realize it wasn’t mine, either.”
“Where is Lincoln?”
“I’ve heard he’s in Montana with an uncle.” Grace lifted the hair off the back of her neck. “It’s hot.”
“No, it isn’t. You’re pregnant.”
“I know.” Grace closed her eyes, reliving. “I’m not going to blame Lincoln, but I do blame myself. I should have walked away.”
“Grace, it is his fault that he hurt you. I’m sure he tried to tell you that it was your fault, and that you made him do it.”
“I know it wasn’t my fault. But I’m taking responsibility for my part in this, Aunt Jacki. I made really bad decisions, and I gave up part of myself. Now I have to find who I am again. It’s way past time for Grace Thomas to take control of her life and grow up.”
“What about that good-looking cowboy in there?” Jacki asked.
“I have to find myself before I let anyone else in my life.”
“So should I load that horse up?”
She shook her head. “No, not yet. I talked to Oregon. I’m moving back to the apartment in town. If I go home I know everyone will help me out. They’ll take care of me. But I don’t want to be taken care of. I’ve been letting too many people make decisions for me, Aunt Jacki. I went to nursing school because my parents are in the medical field. I went to church because my grandfather is a pastor. I moved in with you because you said—” she reached for her aunt’s hand “—I needed adventure. And you were partly right. I did need to find myself. But what I’ve learned is that I need to make some decisions for myself now.”
Her aunt hugged her. “Girl, I am so proud of you. You’re going to do great things, no matter what you decide. Just be strong for yourself, for your baby.”
She nodded, leaning in to her aunt. “Thanks, Aunt Jacki.”
“Well, I should be heading home, then. And you call if you need anything.”
“I’ll call.”
They hugged one last time, then Grace stepped back as Jacki climbed in her truck, gave a wave and headed down the drive and back to Stephenville. When she turned back toward the house, she saw Brody.
“We should talk,” he said as she walked up the steps of the porch. He motioned to the rocking chairs and they sat together.
Grace wanted to reach for his hand but she knew it was the wrong time. “Brody, I’m staying in Martin’s Crossing. But I’m staying for me, not us.”
“I heard.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, really wishing she could reach for his hand. As much as she needed to be strong, she realized she needed his strength. But that was the problem, wasn’t it? She needed to find her own strength, her own way.
“Don’t be sorry, Grace. Just be happy. I’ll be here if you need me.”
“Thank you.” She stood and he remained seated. She saw the hurt in his eyes. She wanted to tell him that maybe someday... But she couldn’t. She wouldn’t make promises she couldn’t keep. And she wouldn’t keep him tied to her, waiting for something that might not happen.
She needed time to have a baby and focus on herself.
“Grace, remember, if you need anything...”
“I’ll call.”
He pushed himself up from the chair. “Could you tell them I had to head back to my place? I’m packing today. I’m moving in to Lawson and Elizabeth’s house.”
“I’ll let them know.”
He waved as he walked away, not even turning to look back at her. She could handle this. She took a breath and rested a hand on her belly. She had this little person counting on her to be strong and make the right decisions.
All of her life people had counted on her to do the right thing. She’d done her best for all of them. This time it was different. This time it was for her.
But her heart broke a little as she watched a cowboy walk away from her for the second time.
Chapter Fifteen
Brody missed his trailer. It wasn’t that Lawson and Elizabeth’s house was at all bad. No, it was the opposite of bad. It looked like something out of a magazine. Stone and wood floors, big windows, a kitchen that a man could get lost in, even if he could only cook scrambled eggs. It had a great stable. He guessed the stable was the biggest attraction for a guy wanting to start a riding camp.
As he walked out to that stable on a morning in early November, Sally following, he thought about checking on Grace. But he wouldn’t. He saw her from time to time, but he was giving her space. Even though that space left a big hole in him.
At least he knew where she was and that she was safe.
From the field his horse Jaz whinnied. And then Earl Grey took a turn, whinnying and heading toward the fence. Brody waited for the two animals. In the distance he heard a truck. Sally had plopped to the ground next to him but she jumped up and started barking.
“Hush, crazy dog.”
A minute later Jake’s truck pulled up the drive. Brody shook his head and gave his attention back to the horses. Jaz got to him first, pushing against his hand looking for a treat.
“Sorry, Jaz. I’m out of carrots. I’ll get some at the store today.” Earl, usually the dominant animal, pushed Jaz away and came in search of a treat. “You two don’t give up.”
“Hey, how’s it going?” Jake walked up, petting Jaz first and then reaching out to Earl. “He’s a good-looking horse. Nice of Rockhurst to give him to you.”
“Yeah, it was. I have another gelding on the line, too.” Brody backed away from the fence and headed toward the barn. He knew Jake would follow. “What brings you out here today?”
“Not much. I have to run to town for antibiotics for some calves and thought I’d stop by and see if you wanted to come over for dinner tonight.”
“Sounds good. Scrambled eggs get old after a while. I’d offer to bring something but I’m sure you’d rather I stay out of the kitchen.”
“I think we’ll be good. Thanks for the help yesterday with that heifer.”
They’d had to pull a calf the day before. It hadn’t been easy and they’d almost lost the momma in the process.
“That’s what I’m here for.” Brody waited, because he knew eventually Jake would get around to his real reason for being here.
“Have you talked to Grace lately?” There it was. Jake’s reason for showing up. His family had taken to not mentioning Grace. There had to be a good reason for bringing her up now.
“No. I see her at church, and every now and then in town. She
’s busy taking online classes and getting ready to have a baby.”
“Yeah, I know. I guess it probably isn’t easy for you that she’s having Lincoln’s baby.”
Brody stepped into the barn, flipping on a light as he went. Jake followed, waiting for an answer. As if Brody had one.
“I guess it doesn’t really matter. It isn’t my baby and she isn’t my concern.”
“You know, Joseph had a similar situation with Mary,” Jake interjected, as if that made sense.
Brody groaned and put a hand up to stop his brother. “For a smart man you come up with the strangest analogies. Do not even try to compare this to Joseph and Mary.”
“I’m just saying you can love a woman and the child she’s carrying, even if the child isn’t yours. I love Rosie and Violet...”
“We all do. And I love...” He shook his head and walked away. “What do you want?”
“I wanted to tell you that Grace is alone. She’s having an ultrasound today and she wouldn’t let Oregon go with her.”
“Women have ultrasounds all the time. What’s so special about this one?”
“She had an appointment last week and they’re concerned, so they scheduled an ultrasound.”
That stopped him in his tracks. The baby. He still didn’t know if it was a boy or a girl. He hadn’t asked because it wasn’t his business. Now his heart kicked in and he tried to brush it off, to tell himself it wasn’t his problem.
“You don’t know what they’re looking for in the ultrasound?”
“No, I don’t. I just thought she shouldn’t be alone. Breezy is strong, Brody. She’s as independent as a woman comes. But she doesn’t like to be alone when she goes to the doctor. I hold her hand every time she has an ultrasound.”
“She’s your wife. You have that right.”
“Guess I’m pushing where it’s none of my business.”
Brody carried a few flakes of hay to the corral where the horses were waiting for breakfast. “I guess you are. If Grace wanted someone with her, she would have asked.”
“You’re right.” Jake put a booted foot on the bottom rail of the corral.
“I know I’m right. You came out here thinking if you told me she needed someone, I’d go running and suddenly we would be all fixed. We don’t need that, Jake.”
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