Marvin sighed. The despair in the boy's voice tore at his heart. "Then why do you do things you know would hurt them if they found out? And they're going to find out, Bo. This is too small a town for them not to. You need to tell them before they find out from somebody else."
Bo didn't respond, and Marvin didn't force it. They had time, he thought, pulling his car up in front of Genesis House.
Marvin and Bo got out. "You paint?" Marvin asked the boy.
"I know how to use a brush."
"Good enough." Marvin placed his hand on Bo's shoulder as they headed up the walkway to the porch. When he introduced the boy to the man leading the outside painting efforts, he squeezed the boy's shoulder, then dropped his hand. "Keep him busy," he said to the man. Then, wanting to give Bo some time to ponder the things he and Shay had said to him, Marvin went inside to check on the other work.
* * *
"What are you going to do with your life?" Marvin asked Bo after everyone but the two of them had left the Genesis House property. They were taking up the drop cloths covering the floor and locking up, preparing to leave.
Bo folded the last of the drop cloths and threw it on top of the stack of cloths piled in the corner of the room. "Keep doing what I'm doing, I guess."
Marvin eyed the boy. "You mean hanging out at Jo-Jo's and getting drunk, or getting ready for college?"
"Here it comes," Bo said, dropping down on the stack of cloths. "The sermon."
Marvin dropped down next to him. "Could be, but doesn't have to be. You didn't answer my question."
The boy rolled his eyes. "You know I didn't mean hanging out and getting drunk. I'm not stupid, you know."
"I know it, but I wasn't sure you did. You don't act like it sometimes."
Bo didn't say anything. He rubbed his hands down the legs of his pants and looked away.
"You and Shay work things out?" Marvin asked, the first time he'd broached the subject with Bo.
"I guess."
"You're not sure?"
"Okay, we're all right." He paused. Then he glanced over at Marvin. "She told me about your son that died. That's rough, man."
Marvin fought to keep his attention on Bo and not let the painful memories distract him. "More than you know, Bo."
Bo studied the newly painted ceiling. "Do you ever feel like good things always happen to other people?"
The question seared Marvin's heart. It hit close to home, too close. "I have," he admitted, "but I'm trying not to."
"It's hard."
Marvin placed his hand on Bo's shoulder, forcing the boy to look at him. "The way I see it, everybody has their share of good and bad. We have to hold on to the good, and that good will help us make it through the bad. Having faith in God helps me to do that, though I don't do it well all the time."
"Like when you were afraid for the new baby?"
Exactly like that, Marvin realized for the first time. "Like that," he said. "Instead of being happy about the baby, I was worried about the bad that could happen. You know what? The worrying couldn't have stopped anything from happening, but it did stop me from enjoying and sharing the happiness of the new baby with Shay. I'll always regret that."
Bo nodded as if he understood, or was trying to understand.
"You have good things in your life, Bo. Your aunts, people like Shay and me who love and care about you, your dreams for the future. You also have a God who loves you dearly, even if you aren't thinking much about him. The funny thing is, he's always thinking about you, always caring about you. You may doubt Shay and me, and we may even let you down, but if you give God a chance, he'll never let you down."
Bo lifted pain-filled eyes to Marvin. "You know," he said, "I messed up at Auburn."
Thank you, Lord. "Everybody messes up sometime and somewhere, Bo," he told him. "You have to decide whether or not you want to get back on track. Just because one door closes doesn't mean they're all closed."
"Maybe Auburn was my only door, and now it's closed."
Marvin shook his head. "That's not true. As long as you're breathing there's hope. You already know that. You wanted to go back to school long before you met Shay and me; we just encouraged you to do it. And you probably wanted to go back to church long before your aunts guilted you into going. You've got the support behind you to make something of your life, Bo. From us and from God."
Bo turned to him. "What about The Aunts? They're old, and they need somebody around. I can't go off to school and leave them."
Marvin knew an excuse when he heard one. "I've met your aunts. They seem to get along pretty well, to me. Besides, I don't think you're taking good care of them by going out, getting drunk, and then getting yourself locked up in jail."
"That doesn't happen every week," Bo shot back. "I've never been in jail before."
"And I hope it won't happen again."
"It won't," Bo promised, and Marvin believed him.
He met Bo's gaze again. "And the next time Shay or I or anybody does something that hurts you, talk to them. Don't let it fester inside. I can tell you from experience that something bad will always happen if you do. Can I get your promise on that?" Bo nodded.
Marvin clapped the boy on the back. "All right, then. Let's get you home."
Chapter 19
Though Shay wanted to sit in the house and wait for Marvin to return home with news of his day with Bo, Vickie convinced her to go for their early-evening walk. Silence ruled their time together as usual. Shay's thoughts drifted over the events that had governed her and Marvin's life since their move to Odessa. She knew now she had done her husband a severe injustice. Believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things, the Bible's description of love said. She'd failed at all three.
Dear Lord, she prayed, her heart becoming lighter with each word. Forgive my unforgiving heart. Shay emptied her heart out before the Lord as she acknowledged and confessed her most recent faults. In addition to the apology she'd already given Bo, she knew she owed apologies to her husband and to Vickie.
"I thought you'd be angry with me," Vickie said when they reached the corner.
"I was, but I'm not anymore," Shay told her, checking the intersection for oncoming traffic. "You were right, Vickie, and I was wrong. I've been wrong about a lot of things. Thank you for being a good enough friend to set me straight before things got any worse." She pressed her hand across her abdomen. "If I had given birth to this child with things the way they are between me and Marvin now, I would have regretted it for the rest of my life."
Vickie looked at her with eyes full of tears. "I'm so happy you said that. I feared I might lose my closest friend."
Shay waved her hand to dismiss her friend's concern. "You'll never lose me as a friend, and I always want you to be honest with me. Given the problems that were going on with Marvin and me, I was wrong to ask you to be my labor coach. Though I honestly didn't realize it at the time, asking you was just another way for me to make Marvin pay for the wrongs I felt he'd done to me since I told him about the baby." She sighed. "I never thought of myself as a petty and vindictive person, but I think I've been pretty petty and vindictive about this whole thing. Can you forgive me?"
Vickie took her hand. "You're already forgiven. Besides, I wanted to be a part of your baby's birth. I hold some responsibility because I did sort of force myself in."
Shay tightened her hold on the hand that held hers. "You did no such thing. You acted as the perfect friend. If things had been good between Marvin and me and I had asked you for the right reasons, all would be well. The fault is mine, not yours."
Vickie cast her a sidelong glance. "What's made you so wise all of a sudden?"
Shay chuckled. "I wish I could say that I came to my senses, or that I finally spent some time in prayer and heard the Lord's voice, but that's not the case. The Lord had to hit me with a two-by-four."
Vickie laughed. "Sounds like the way he has to get my attention sometimes. So what happened?"
What hadn't
happened? "First, I found out that Bo overheard something I said about him during an argument I was having with Marvin." She proceeded to give Vickie the details.
"Oh no," Vickie said, pressing her hand to her mouth.
"Unfortunately, oh yes," Shay said. "He wouldn't even talk to me after the ball game Friday night. And then we—rather Marvin—got a call from him this morning. Bo was in jail."
Vickie's eyes widened. "You're not serious?"
Shay gave an affirmative nod. "Yes, I am. We went down this morning and got him out. I couldn't help but feel responsible."
"Bo's old enough to make his own choices, Shay. Don't put that on yourself."
Shay wasn't so sure. She knew she'd always feel some responsibility for what had happened with Bo. "You're right in a way, Vickie, but in another way, I did let Bo down. We knew when we met him that he had issues, and the Lord entrusted us to care for him. But we were too wrapped up in problems of our own making to care for him the way we should have, the way the Lord wanted. You know, it's difficult to love people outside your home the right way when you aren't doing a good job of loving the ones inside. We let down both Bo and the Lord on that one." She paused to fight her tears. "The good news is that I was able to apologize to Bo this morning. Of course, my apology didn't make everything right between us, but it was a start."
Giving her a sideways hug, Vickie said, "I'm proud of you."
Shay met her eyes. "Hey, don't get carried away. I've made a few too many critical mistakes for you to be too proud."
"I'm not proud of you because of the mistakes," Vickie explained, "I'm proud of the way you're handling them. Does this mean all is well with you and Marvin?"
Shay smiled as she thought about her husband. She thanked God that she had come to her senses before it was too late. "As far as I'm concerned, everything's well between me and my wonderful husband, but I haven't talked to him yet. I plan to as soon as he gets home tonight." She wiped a hand down her face. "I've been awful to him, Vickie."
Shay knew she had wrongly tried and convicted her husband. She'd been so sure she knew God's heart concerning her and Marvin and the baby that she hadn't given the Lord the time or the opportunity to make his heart known to her husband. No, she'd moved full speed ahead without waiting for the Lord to do the necessary work in her husband. When Marvin had tried to express his fears, she'd ignored them, thinking she or external events could change his feelings. She'd forgotten once again that it's God who changes hearts. Her job was to get out of the way so God could do his work. Instead, she'd positioned herself between God and Marvin, cutting off both herself and her husband from the blessings God wanted to give them.
"You haven't been awful, exactly," Vickie told her with a teasing smile, "but you have been a bit rough on him."
"And I intend to spend the rest of my life making it up to him. Marvin Taylor is going to be the happiest and most contented husband in the world."
Vickie chuckled. "I want to be around to see that." When they reached the second street over, she said, "Maybe we should turn back. I want you to be there when Marvin comes home."
Shay reached for her friend's hand and squeezed. She appreciated Vickie's concern. "I think I can make it another block or two. Marvin's with Bo and the others at Genesis House, and I'm not sure when he'll be home."
Vickie smiled. "Let's keep going then."
Shay stepped off the curb and into a crack in the pavement, twisting her ankle in the process. She saw Vickie reach for her, but she knew she was going to fall. She saw herself go down, and then all went black.
* * *
Marvin had a lot to think about and pray about. Discussing Bo's fears had made him aware of the impact of his own personal fears. Bo had been hurt because of Shay's words. Shay had spoken hateful words because he, Marvin, had hurt her. He had hurt her because of his fear that God would hurt him by allowing her or the baby to be harmed. The cruel circle of pain had started with him.
"All your applications are in. So when do you take the exam?" he asked Bo. For the last half hour, he had sat on the steps of Bo's house, talking with the young man and catching up on the events in his life.
"Two weeks," Bo said, "but—"
Marvin looked up to see what had distracted Bo and saw Daniel making his way down the sidewalk. He stood as his friend approached the porch. Daniel's eyes told him something was desperately wrong. Shay. It had to be Shay. Something had happened to Shay. "What's up, man?" Marvin asked.
Daniel placed an arm on his shoulder. "It's Shay," he said. "She fell. Hit her head. They've taken her to the hospital."
Marvin's knees buckled, and only Daniel's arm on his kept him from falling to the ground. His upper body trembled with fear. "Let's go," he said. He wouldn't allow himself to ask how bad it was.
When Daniel pulled up to the emergency entrance of the Overton Hospital twenty minutes later, Marvin hopped out of the car before it came to a full stop. He raced toward the receptionist's desk. "My wife. I'm looking for my wife."
"Name?" the clerk behind the enclosed reception area asked without looking up at him.
"Taylor. Sharonetta Taylor." The words rushed out of his mouth.
The clerk seemed to take forever to shuffle through the mountain of papers on her desk. Marvin drummed his blunt fingernails against the counter. Please, Lord, let them both be all right, he prayed, repeating the litany he'd begun as soon as he'd gotten in Daniel's car. His friend's reassurances had done little to ease Marvin's anxiety.
The clerk finally looked up, though Marvin doubted his face registered in her mind. "She's in examination room three."
Marvin sprinted off in the direction of the examination rooms, ignoring the clerk's "You can't go back there." At the door to Shay's room, he paused and took a deep breath. "Please, Lord," he prayed out loud, "let them both be all right."
Slowly, he eased the door open. The quiet activity of the hospital staff around the bed made his heart thump so harshly that he thought it would push through his skin. A man in hospital greens studied a monitor near the head of the bed, while another man, dressed in street clothes with a stethoscope around his neck, flipped through papers on the clipboard he held in his hands. A woman dressed in nurses' white, her back to Marvin, stood near the foot of the bed. The three of them blocked Marvin's view of his wife.
The nurse turned and saw him. He wondered if she'd heard his heartbeat. "You're not supposed to be back here, sir," she said, her tone pleasant but firm.
"I'm Marvin Taylor. She's my wife."
The nurse walked over to him at the door. "I'm sorry," she said, "but you still can't stay back here." She placed her hand on his, and he snatched it away. "Sir—"
He breathed deeply, fighting to maintain the tenuous hold he had on his emotions. "Let me see her and I'll go. I need to see her."
"It's all right, Ethel."
The man dressed in street clothes had spoken. He now stood next to Marvin and the nurse. Marvin assumed he was the doctor. Marvin looked past him to his wife in the bed. His knees went weak again when he saw her lying there, her eyes closed, the lump in her stomach barely visible. She looked so very beautiful to him, and so very fragile.
Why, Lord? his heart cried. Why are you doing this to me? Please, don't use Shay and the baby to punish me. I know I'm not worthy, but they're innocent. All Shay ever did was love me. Don't make her pay for that. Don't make me pay. Haven't we paid enough already? You took Marvin Jr. Please don't take Shay and the baby.
Marvin met the doctor's gaze, wanting to know the details of his wife's condition, but unable to voice the question foremost in his mind.
"She suffered a slight concussion," the doctor explained as if reading Marvin's thoughts. "As you can imagine, she was pretty agitated with concern about the baby during the ambulance ride over here, but she finally calmed down and fell asleep, exhausted. Her obstetrician's in the building, and we've run the necessary tests."
Marvin focused his eyes on his wife, his heart willing he
r to be all right. "She's going to be all right, right?" he asked, needing to hear the doctor say the words. "And the baby?"
"Both of them are fine," the doctor told him. "Of course, we're going to monitor them closely for the next twenty-four to forty-eight hours. Your wife is resting now, which is the best thing for her and the baby."
Thank you, Lord.
Marvin met the doctor's gaze. "I need to touch her," he said. "Just touch her so I'll know she's all right."
The doctor looked from Marvin to the patient in the bed and back to Marvin. "Only for a moment," he said.
At the doctor's nod, Marvin moved to the bed. Tears rolled unheeded down his cheeks when he folded his wife's warm hand in his. He squeezed and when he felt her squeeze in return, he felt as though a large hand had caressed his heart. Even in her sleep, she sought to comfort him. He leaned over and pressed a kiss against her closed lips. "I love you," he whispered.
"You're going to have to leave now," the doctor said from behind him. Marvin reluctantly dropped his wife's hand and stepped away from the bed.
The doctor turned to Nurse Ethel and said, "Why don't you escort Mr. Taylor to the private waiting room and get him something to drink?" Then he said to Marvin, "We'll be finished here shortly, and I'll come and get you so that you can sit with her."
Marvin accepted the doctor's words with a slight inclination of his head. Then he followed the nurse called Ethel out of the examination room and in the opposite direction of the way he'd entered. When they reached the small waiting area, Vickie ran to him. "Oh, Marvin," she said, her eyes red and damp. "She fell. She fell off the curb. I tried to catch her, but... she hit her head. I tried."
"It's all right, Vickie," he said, trying to comfort the woman with a comfort he himself didn't feel. "She's going to be all right. Both she and the baby."
Vickie got herself together and pulled away. "You're right," she said. "She's going to be fine." Vickie resumed her seat. Marvin took one next to her. Neither spoke; Marvin knew it was because Vickie was praying, just as he was. He held on to the memory of Shay squeezing his hand.
After what seemed to be a long while but was probably only a few minutes, the doctor came back to see them. Marvin and Vickie quickly stood.
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