“The keys to one of the Cadillacs are on the stand by the door. The number’s on the key ring.”
“Thanks, Sister.”
“Puh-leez. We run a funeral home. The one thing we have plenty of is Cadillacs. Enjoy yourself today.”
Laughing, Francine rushed up the stairs, eager to continue the first day of the rest of her life.
* * *
Just as Francine expected, Mother Harris was at the bookstore long before the 10 a.m. opening time. Her Lincoln Town Car was a dead giveaway. Francine smiled when she thought about the petite older woman behind the wheel of such a big car. Mother Harris had been a minister’s wife for thirty-five years when her husband died. She said they’d driven Town Cars all her married life so she didn’t see any reason to stop now. Like clockwork, every three years she traded in her signature burgundy Town Car for a brand new one exactly like it. The older woman’s predictability now gave Francine a sense of comfort, while in the past she’d considered it quirky.
As she got out of her car Francine felt a high level of anxiety, wondering how Mother Harris would receive her. When she thought of the cruel things she’d said to the older woman, she had to bite back tears. She knew the door to the store was unlocked, so she didn’t bother knocking. The door chimes signaled her entry. Mother Harris peered at her from the counter that was located near the back wall of the store, a position that gave her a clear, wide-angle view of everything that happened in the room.
“Francie?” she called. “Is that you, Francie?”
“It’s me, Mother Harris,” Francine said, rushing forward.
“Oh, praise the Lord, it is you!” Mother Harris opened her arms wide and Francine stepped into them as though she’d never been away. When she felt the smaller woman’s arms wrap around her, the dam she hadn’t realized she had inside seemed to burst and she began to cry. Not those polite tears that sometimes flowed out of happiness. No, these tears were accompanied by wailing sounds that indicated the depth of Francine’s sorrow.
“Now, now, it’s gonna be all right,” Mother Harris was saying. “You’re home now and everything’s gonna be all right.”
Francine still couldn’t stop her tears. “I’m so sorry, Mother Harris,” she said between hiccups. “I’m so sorry.”
“I know you are, sweetie. I know you are.”
“I was afraid you would hate me,” she said, when she could complete a sentence. “I know I’d hate me.”
Mother Harris stood back and wiped Francine’s tears with her weathered hands. “I could never hate you, child. You should’ve known better than that. Love and hate can’t dwell in the same vessel. You know that, don’t you?”
“Oh, Mother Harris,” Francine said, pulling the older woman close again. “I’ve missed you so much. How could I ever have left you?”
“Well, children have to spread their wings sometime. You just chose a pretty strange way to spread yours.”
Laughing, Francine stepped back. “Nobody but you, Mother Harris. Nobody but you could have me laughing like this when my life is in such a shambles.”
“Now, stop saying that, Francie. Your life is not in shambles. The way I see it, your life is standing pretty tall about right now.” She cupped Francine’s cheeks in her hands. “We’re so glad you’re back. Whyever did you stay gone so long?” Mother Harris took Francine’s hands and guided her to a high-backed oak stool behind the counter. Taking the matching stool next to Francine’s, the older woman said, “Tell me what you’ve got planned.”
“What makes you think I have plans?”
“I know you, Francie. I bet you have a notebook with all your plans written in it. You always were the little organizer. Everything had to be in order for you, everything had to make sense. I hope you’ve learned that some things don’t make sense, no matter how hard you try to make sense of them.”
“I think I’m learning the hard way.”
Mother Harris laughed. “That’s you too. Your grandmother used to have me laughing so hard with stories of you and Dawn that she made my sides hurt. You were her little logic bird and Dawn was her little feeling bird.”
“We drove her crazy, her and Big Daddy.”
“They loved every minute of it, and don’t you ever think different. You two girls were the lights of their lives. Not that you didn’t keep them up many a night praying. I have to say, though, that Dawn kept them on their knees a lot more than you did.”
“I wonder what they’re thinking of me now. I know I’ve let them down.”
“Don’t even think like that,” Mother Harris chided. “They’re sorry you had to take such a hard road, but they’re glad you’ve come out on the other side and so am I. It’s good to have you back home where you belong, Francie. We’ve missed you, girl, and we need you.”
“Need me?”
“Of course we need you. We needed you when you left, but you couldn’t see it. Thought you had to be on a traveling ministry team to serve God. I hope you know now that that’s not true.”
“More than you know, Mother Harris.” And with that truth came the bitter knowledge that the last five years didn’t have to happen.
“Well, that doesn’t matter. What matters now is what you’re going to do. So tell me what it is.”
Francine took a deep sigh. “I have to get a job and I have to make amends to all the people that I hurt when I left, not necessarily in that order.”
Mother Harris beamed. “That’s my girl. I knew you’d come out of this still trusting the Lord.”
Francine didn’t have the heart to tell Mother Harris of the uncertainties she still held. The older woman was so happy; Francine couldn’t burst her bubble.
“Now,” Mother Harris was saying, “I could use somebody full-time in the store here. You wouldn’t be interested in that, would you?”
Francine couldn’t believe her luck. Of course, she knew it wasn’t luck; it was God. “It’d be perfect, Mother Harris. I love it here, and I love being around you all day.”
“That’s sweet of you to say, Francie, but if you’re going to be here full-time, I probably won’t be.”
“What’ll you be doing?”
“Let’s just say I need to do a little wing spreadin’ of my own. So when can you start?”
“You’re serious?”
“As a heart attack, and at my age a heart attack is pretty serious.”
Francine chuckled as a deep sense of well-being settled within her. “Okay, I can start today.”
“You’re sure you don’t want to try to find a job somewhere else? You haven’t even asked about the salary or the hours.”
“They don’t matter. This is where I need to be. You may want to think about it though. No doubt a lot of people that I offended will come through those doors. They may not like that you’ve hired me. I’d hate for my presence here to affect your business. Maybe we should try my working here on a trial basis?”
Mother Harris waved her hand in dismissal. “Forget a trial basis. You start today and that’s final. Anybody doesn’t like it, they can take it up with me and God. Between the two of us, we’ll set them straight.”
Francine leaned over and hugged the older woman.
When Mother Harris pulled away, she said, “Now, enough of this sitting and chitchatting. Let’s start to working and chitchatting. We have a lot to do. You’d better lock that front door. We’re going to be in the back for a while.”
Francine laughed as she slid off her stool. As directed, she went and locked the front door and then she followed Mother Harris back to the storeroom.
Chapter 5
Since Francine decided to go job hunting, Dawn changed her mind about sleeping in and instead decided to pamper herself with a visit to her favorite day spa, Kings and Queens, for a facial, manicure, pedicure, and massage. Dolores King, the proprietress, a tall, big-boned woman with perfect mahogany skin, met her at the door. “Morning, Dawn,” she said, holding the door open for her. “You’re our first customer of t
he day.”
“Morning to you,” Dawn said to the woman who’d started Kings and Queens on a shoestring budget about six years ago and grown it into one of the most popular day spas in southwest DeKalb. “Thanks for fitting me in.”
Dolores smiled at her. “If we had VIP customers, girl, you’d be one of them. You know we have to make room for you. You are blessed to get Tomika for your massage though, she has a cancellation.”
“That is a blessing,” Dawn said. “I know how booked up she gets. You have me down for my regular appointment next week, don’t you?”
“Yep,” Dolores said. She led Dawn to one of the dressing rooms near the back of the salon so she could shed her clothes and slip into one of Kings and Queens’s plush white terry-cloth robes. “How’d your trip go?” Dolores asked when Dawn joined her at the first in a line of eight pampering stations, each equipped for facials, manicures, and pedicures.
“It’s over,” Dawn said as she took a seat in the station’s lightly vibrating massage chair. Dolores lifted her feet and placed them in the warm herbal water that would make them baby soft. “That’s about the best thing I can say about it.”
“Well, at least your sister’s home.”
“Thank God for that,” Dawn said.
Dolores picked up Dawn’s right hand and placed it on the tray table in front of her and began removing last week’s polish. “You should have brought her with you. I bet she could use some pampering time.”
“That’s a great idea,” Dawn said. “I’ve had so much on my mind that I didn’t even think of it. Can you fit her in with me next week?”
“I’ll check,” Dolores said. She put Dawn’s hands in cool foamy water to soak and then headed for the receptionist’s desk to check her schedule.
Dawn heard the door chimes that indicated the arrival of another client. “Hey, Dolores,” said a voice Dawn had come to hate. She braced herself to face the woman who had betrayed her. “Girl, do I need a massage this morning!” added the woman.
“Rough weekend?” Dolores asked.
“You said it, girl. This one was a killer. We were in church all weekend. I mean every minute.”
“What? Were you having revival?”
“No, girl, the Women’s Retreat at Berean Bible,” said the woman. “I told you about it, and, girl, you know how those things go. Get a few of us sisters together and we can talk up a storm. We gabbed from sunup to sundown. You should’ve been there.”
The voices grew louder as Dolores led Fredericka Andrews back to the pampering stations. “Next time you have a retreat, I’ll have to supply you with some spa gift certificates,” said Dolores. “It’ll be great advertising for me. Now let’s get you back here. Missy’ll be out in a minute.”
“Great—” Fredericka’s voice dropped off when she saw Dawn. “—idea.”
“You two know each other, don’t you?” Dolores asked.
Dawn boldly met Freddie’s green-eyed gaze. A black woman with green eyes? Puh-leez, stop with the colored contacts! “Yes,” she said, fighting to maintain a straight face, “our church choirs have competed in the city’s Battle of the Church Choirs for the last few years. Freddie’s husband, Walter, directs their choir.” She wondered if Fredericka and Sly had been sleeping together since that first competition. He’d denied the affair had gone on for that long, but she couldn’t be sure. “Walter’s choir did a great job last year, Freddie.”
Freddie nodded, taking a seat at the station next to Dawn’s. “Thanks, yours did well too.”
“But we didn’t make the finals and y’all did. I believe in giving credit where credit is due. Are y’all competing this year?”
“Of course,” Freddie said. “Walter and the choir look forward to it every year. How about y’all?”
“It’s the same,” Dawn said. “Looking forward to it each year keeps everybody on their toes.” Dawn couldn’t believe she was actually carrying on a conversation with this woman. Though the affair was an unspoken secret between the two women, Dawn was pretty sure that Fredericka had no idea how often she, Dawn, talked to Walter. Dawn ached to gloat to the green-eyed witch that she knew Walter had moved out and was staying with one of his buddies. He hadn’t filed for a divorce yet, but he was thinking about it. Dawn sympathized with Walter, and she felt Fredericka was getting what she deserved.
Missy joined them then. “Morning, ladies,” the twenty-something girl said. “Sorry to keep you waiting, Freddie.” She took the stool in front of Fredericka.
“Freddie was telling us about the Women’s Retreat at her church,” Dolores said.
“I heard,” Missy said. “Sounds like it was a lot of fun. Just women?”
Freddie nodded. “Not a man in sight. None were invited.”
“Sometimes those women fests are good,” Dawn said, unable to resist taking a jab at Fredericka, “but sometimes you need men around to keep it interesting.”
Before Freddie could rise to the bait, Dolores inserted, “Well, all I know is that sometimes it’s good to get away from the men. They tend to crowd a woman’s mind.” She cast a wink at Freddie. “But then I’m not married to fine men like the two of you. You two know you got yourselves some good men.” She glanced from Dawn to Freddie and back again. “Don’t y’all go all humble on me now. You can say it. You know you’ve got yourselves some good men, don’t you?”
If you only knew, Dawn thought. But she met Freddie’s eyes and said, “I know it.”
“Some women have it too good, Missy,” Dolores said. “Handsome, successful husbands. It’s enough to make a single woman like me jealous. How about you?”
“Jealous ain’t the word,” Missy said, her beaded braids jangling as she scrubbed one of Freddie’s feet. “I should go straight to the animal shelter to get a date because all I seem to get are dogs.”
Dawn chuckled along with the rest of the women. Fly girl Missy’s relationships rivaled the best soap operas.
Fredericka added, “Then you should have been at the retreat, girl. We talked that subject inside and out.”
“Now I know I shoulda been there,” Dolores said. “I thought it might have been a bunch of happily married women like you and Dawn bragging about your husbands. I knew I couldn’t deal with that.”
Freddie met Dawn’s eyes for a brief second, and then turned her attention to Dolores. “It was nothing like that, girl. It was for all women, married and single. The message for single women was about what it means to wait on God.”
“Is that all?” Dolores asked. “I already know all about waiting.” She huffed. “I could write a book about waiting.”
As the Fredericka-witch continued to spout on about what she had learned at the retreat, Dawn tuned her out. Freddie had some nerve. All up in the salon talking about church, all up in the church talking about God, and sleeping with my husband. If only lightning would strike her dead. But that would be too good for her. Dawn was glad Freddie’s husband had left her. A divorce would serve her right. Dawn cut her eyes at Freddie, wondering for the millionth time what Sly had seen in her. All Dawn saw was a long, thin redbone. She saw nothing in Freddie that came close to giving her competition. Evidently, Sly had seen something.
“Hey, Dawn,” Dolores asked, turning Dawn’s thoughts back to the conversation. “Does Sylvester have any friends you could introduce me and Missy to? You know what they say about birds of a feather.”
“Sorry, but Sly’s not doing much flocking this year. He’s spending most of his time at home.” She eyed Freddie. “With me.”
Finished with Dawn’s nails, Dolores lifted one of Dawn’s feet out of the warm herbal bath and placed it on the footrest. “Don’t rub it in. We’re already jealous enough. So what else did you talk about at the retreat, Freddie? How do we keep waiting? Sometimes I feel like I’ve spent my whole life waiting.”
“Maybe if I knew the answer to that,” the overly dramatic Missy said, “I wouldn’t keep making the same mistakes with men.” She sighed so hard and long that the o
ther three women laughed again.
“What we talked about this weekend was that waiting means serving God and doing what He wants you to do,” Fredericka explained.
“You know,” Dolores said, “I’ve heard that all my adult life, but it doesn’t stop me from being lonely. I go to church, I’m involved in the women’s group, I feed the hungry on Wednesday nights, but when I go home after a day’s work and an evening’s service, lonely meets me at the door. You’d think a teenaged daughter would take the edge off the loneliness, but Monika’s developing her own life and her own interests and most of them don’t include her dear mother.”
Dawn found herself drawn into the conversation. She wanted to tell them that marriage was no answer to loneliness. She knew that you could be married and lonely and she knew for a fact that it was a worse lonely than the loneliness she remembered from being single.
“Being married is not a cure for loneliness,” Freddie said, surprising Dawn with her honesty. “Married women deal with it too. I haven’t figured it all out, but I’m trying to read my Bible and pray when I get lonely. The only way we can know if God will be there for us in those times like He said He would is to give Him a try.”
“Well,” Dolores said, “you have to let me know how it goes, because I don’t see how reading the Bible is going to end the loneliness.”
“It’s not magic,” Freddie agreed, “but I figure that I have to decide whether I want to find a way to deal with the loneliness in God’s way, or keep finding ways to deal with the guilt I feel when I deal with it in my way.”
“Amen to that,” Dolores said. “Sometimes lonely does make you do things you know aren’t right.”
“I can sure give a second to that one,” Missy said.
Freddie glanced at Dawn again, her eyes seeming to want something. “I’ve been there too,” Freddie said. “Lonely can make you do things you never thought you’d do, and you end up hurting yourself and others, even though you didn’t mean to. A lot of innocent people get hurt and, no matter how hard you try, what you did is still there and you can’t take it back.”
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