by Lace, Lolah
I sat up in bed and swung my manicured toes to the floor. I was going to get my bearings this time. I refuse to fall to the floor this time. I suddenly went into a panic as my head whipped around to the basement door.
Oh snap, the door was wide open. Mason kept his promise to let me roam free. I could now exhale. Shoop, shoop, yes I was waiting to exhale. I get to walk around this place freely.
There was a stack of papers on the bedside table. I grabbed them so I could get a closer look. I read the top sheet. It read Decree of Divorce. It said it was issued in Will County, Illinois. Mason’s name was under plaintiff. Tess’ name was typed under defendant. There was a case number, a file number, a date and a lot of paragraphs.
I lifted the first page and my eyes scanned the other pages. There were a lot of pages to this document. The papers also listed the terms of the divorce and it was signed by a judge. The divorce had been granted. It was right here in black and white.
What does this mean? Does it mean he means business? Does it mean he’s serious about a future with me? Why did he sit it here for me to see? For so long Mason had my nose wide open. He was always playing me crazy. Sometimes I felt like I was number one, other times the side piece and other times the red beans and rice. These divorce papers almost seem like an optical illusion.
I jumped out of bed and a feeling of pure joy washed over me. I started humming the music to The Wiz, Ease On Down The Road. “Da-dum da da da.” I felt the need to sing and dance and that’s just what I did because Iz free.
“Don’t you carry nothing that might be a load, c’mon ease on down, ease on down, down the road.” I twirled and kicked like Diana Ross had taken possession of my body. I had my imaginary young Michael Jackson on one side and my imaginary Nipsey Russell on the other side.
I was going to find a way to get out of this house and lookey lookey my cell phone is right here on the table. I picked up my cell. Mason had texted me. I read his text. [I left for work. Be home around 5:30.]
I’m not going to respond. I needed a plan and I needed clothes. I wasn’t running away this time. I was going out for a wee bit of air. I was storming away from the crazy castle while my Lord King Mason was building his merry fortresses about the land.
I looked over at the digital clock and it was only nine in the morning. If I get out of here quick I can be back before Mason gets in from work.
First, wash my ass. Second, find some clothes to wear out in the blistering cold. I danced over to the three white and red plastic Target bags that were on the floor in the corner.
I searched in the bags and saw a few bras. They were the right size, 36C. There were thongs in various colors, no panties. No surprise there. He had got me a few shirts, a large sweater and two pairs of jeans. The jeans were the right size. He also got me shoes, ballerina flats and some cute black boots with buckles on them. How the hell does Mason know all my sizes? Freaky.
I took a bath instead of a shower. I needed to soak my cootie cat. I dressed in the clothes Mason bought and I must say I looked half-way decent. The buckled boots were especially cute on me. My hair was a mess, no gel but my perm was fresh so a little water made it lay flat enough.
I roamed the house that was more like a mansion. There were bedrooms everywhere. Some of the rooms smelled like paint. There were even more rooms in the basement. I was being held hostage in only one of them.
The dining area was spacious but there wasn’t any furniture in the house. The kitchen cabinets were bare of food but there were a few pots, pans and utensils. The refrigerator had milk and a few bottles of water. There was more food in the basement frig.
Mason hasn’t had this place long. There was no landline in the house but there was cable and an internet connection. There was only the one bed that I slept in and the one flatscreen TV that was in the basement with me.
I found my way into the garage. My car was the only vehicle parked inside it. Where the hell are my car keys? I stopped moving to think. I remembered my spare key.
Ever since I became a mother I always keep a spare key car in my make-up bag. One of my friends accidentally locked her infant inside her car at a gas station. It was the dead of winter. I never forgot it. So when I had Trey I made sure I had two keys on me at all times.
I rushed back into the house. Mason had given me back my purse. I was sure Mason didn’t look in my make-up bag. Why would he?
I raced down to the basement and I found my purse. My spare car key was in the make-up bag. I always found a rubber band so I made me a ponytail.
I stopped moving long enough to think about Mason coming home early to check up on me. I could leave a note. I was starting to panic. I needed to calm my dumb ass down. I was thinking too hard about Mason’s feelings. If he came back and I was gone, it would be hell to pay. It would also hurt him. I should just go before I change my mind. I’m coming back, I am. I told him I would. I promised. Whatever. Bounce bitch.
My feet reluctantly took me back up the stairs. I went out the back door into the garage and went on my way. I got to the main road and recognized the street sign.
I had a few stops to make before I returned to prison. I made my own work release program. I was on borrowed time so I couldn’t turn back now.
I made a phone call and had a destination to go to in seconds. I pulled up to my girl Toya’s house. She was off on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Her kids were in school so we would get to have some privacy. I needed it. I needed her counsel. I needed to unload. I had a lot to say to her. She opened her front door before I got a chance to ring her doorbell.
“Hey girl.” I stepped inside her home and gave her a hug.
“Is that my home girl?”
“It’s me. It’s me.” I joked.
“OMG you are alive and well.”
“I am alive. But well…I don’t know about that one.” Toya closed the door behind me.
I walked over to her couch and plopped down.
“Fill in the blanks Miss Lady. I flipped the ‘F’ out when you didn’t show up at the church. I was like oh my goodness, oh my goodness.” Toya ran around in two full circles. “I was like this chick must think she Julia Roberts in Runaway Bride.”
“More like that blonde girl in Taken.”
“Taken, okay then.” Toya titled her head and peered over the lenses of her glasses at me. She took a seat in the lounge chair in front of me.
“Oh Toya, where do I start?”
“From the beginning, skip the prologue. ‘Aint nobody got time fo’ that.” Toya successfully mimicked Sweet Brown.
“Okay.”
“Wait, wait. Do I need some popcorn, Raisinets or Gummie Bears or something?”
“Girl, don’t play with me. I’m fragile.”
“Wait, wait. You know Jack has called me.”
“No, I didn’t know that. I haven’t seen him.”
“He’s been over here. He was looking for you in the daylight with a flashlight. I think Jack thought I was lying to him when I told him I hadn’t heard from you.”
“Seriously?”
“I let him come in and look around. I wanted him to stop blowing my cell up.”
“He was tripping like that?”
Toya rolled her eyes and pushed her glasses up on her nose. “Gurlllll!”
“Damn.”
“He took it hard. He got a beard. He looks a lukewarm mess. But let’s push that there over yonder ways. What the hell happened to you on your wedding day Miss Unger, excuse me Fenderson?”
“You got jokes.”
“You got some explaining to do.”
“Okay, well, you know I was still seeing Mason on a friendship level.”
“Uh-hum, breaking bread with the enemy.”
“I went to Mena’s to get my hair done. I left the shop to meet him so he could give me my wedding gift. I thought it would be a gift card or something.”
“Okay.” She nodded.
“No, no, ch
ick, Mason kidnapped me.”
“Oh hell naw!” Toya threw her hands up in the air.
“Oh hell to the yes! He took me. He picked my ass up and took my ass. He said he couldn’t let me get married to Jack.”
“Get the ‘F’ out outta here. He got a lot of nerve. He’s married and you can’t get married.”
“He’s not married anymore. He got a divorce for real this time. I peeped the divorce papers.”
“Dayum!”
“That’s what I said. All this time he’s been playing me and then once he knows I’m getting married he has the nerve to go get a divorce. He should have left that raggedy ass bitch a long time ago.”
“Girl that is straight crazy.”
“Right, I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried.”
“So what did he do? He kidnapped you and then let you go.”
“Pretty much, well actually I snuck out his house. He doesn’t know I’m gone.”
“He’s going to F-ing freak out when he sees you’re gone.”
“I’m going to go back before he gets home from work.”
“Why?”
“I said I would. Do I really want crazy ass Mason out looking for me?”
“Hell no. Be careful, as long as you got a plan.”
“You know I do.”
“You not afraid of your personal Dexter Morgan?”
“You know I ‘aint afraid of nobody but God. Mason is harmless.”
“Just make sure you check his trunk for duct tape, plastic rip-ties, garbage bags, a chainsaw and a shovel.” She laughed out loud at her joke. I couldn’t help but join in when she put imaginary tape on her mouth and started pretending to dig a hole.
Oh shit, Mason put tape on my mouth once and it was so unbelievably intense, hot and passionate.
“Very funny, Mason would never hurt me.”
“You love making excuses for him.”
“Do I?”
“Chick please, you ride or die when it comes to Mason.”
“I am?”
“Yeah but it’s okay Kari because he is ride or die for you too.”
“Yeah he is.” I thought about her astute assessment of us.
“You know I loved Jack.”
“Yeah but not like you love Mason.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because it’s true and you just said you loved Jack, like it the past. Not that you love him currently.”
“I just said it wrong.”
“Uh-huh.” Toya smirked and raised both her eyebrows. “Jack is going to flip the ‘F’ out when he finds out you been shacking up with his arch nemesis.”
“Shacking up.”
“Chick please, he had you with him since Saturday. I know that thuggish ass Mason done got it in. You ‘aint gotta lie to me.”
I closed my eyes. “Yes lord. I couldn’t resist him. He’s like chocolate cake. I see it and I got to have a piece.”
“So what are you with Mason now?”
“I’m single I guess. Jack will never ever take me back.”
“Even if Jack did take you back, he’s not who you want. Mason is single now so maybe you can finally be together.”
“I’m scared and I’m confused.”
“I get that.”
“Do I listen to my heart or do I try to get my old life back?”
“I know you ‘aint asking me.”
“Shit girl I need all the help I can get.”
“I’m trying to get rid of my little boyfriend. I can’t really give you any advice until I start dating men my own age.” We both giggled.
“I wish I could stay longer but I want to pick Trey up from school. I haven’t seen him since Saturday.”
“Cool.”
“Was everybody mad that I didn’t show up to the wedding?”
“I wouldn’t say mad, mostly worried. Jack, I don’t know how he was that day. You know he’s hard to read. He was with his fine friend Robert. The next day is when he started blowing up my phone.”
“I had no idea.”
“Your girl Karen was upset. She pulled me to the side and asked me if you were still dealing with her brother. I didn’t give anything away. I told her, not that I know of.”
“You are the only one that knew I still talk to him.”
“I know so I just played dumb.”
“Thanks girl. This is a mess.” I sighed. My mind was a computer that was about to crash.
“It’ll be okay.”
“I hope so. I will get back with you later.”
“Call me if you need me. You know if it’s okay with thuggish ruggish bone.”
“I will be calling.” I tried to smile with confidence but there was something missing.
I left Toya’s house and I was more confused than ever. I desperately wanted to call Jack. It was never my purpose to hurt him. I was feeling some type of way about it. Leaving someone at the altar is awful. I thought I reached my ultimate low when I had an affair with a married man but this was worse. It surely felt that way to me.
Just because I didn’t kidnap myself doesn’t mean I’m not culpable. I blame myself. I should have never continued to see Mason. I couldn’t really let him go. Mason is my first true love in so many ways. I feel like he was that real love Mary J. Blige was signing about way back in the day.
My next stop was over to my Mama’s place. She was at work but I had a key on the same ring as my spare key car. I was going to just chill in familiar territory until she got home. I only had a few minutes with her until I went to the school to pick up Trey. He was happy to see me. He showered me with kisses. I had a flash of what it was like when it was just him and me. There was no Lamar, no Mason and no Jack. It was just me and my little man. Damn, those days were so peaceful and so uncomplicated.
Trey asked me why I didn’t get married. I told him I changed my mind. The explanation must have been good enough because he started talking about the field trip his class was taking next month.
When we arrived back at my Mama’s house I had to fill my mother in on the details of my disappearance. I omitted some of the more upsetting details, like being lured, drugged, and kidnapped. I guess I just flat out lied.
I told her that I wasn’t sure Jack was the man for me. I told her we had been having some problems in our relationship. I told her although he never hit me he had said things to me I found to be disturbing. I told her he was a bit controlling and I started having second thoughts so I went with my gut feeling.
She mostly shook her head and listened. Jack was a really nice guy. He was somewhat illusive so what I was saying wasn’t too off the mark. She believed it and I was happy she wasn’t pissed at me.
I told my Mama that I needed a few more days to get myself together. Surprisingly she didn’t ask me a whole bunch of questions. She wanted to know where I was staying. I told her I was staying in a hotel. I told her I wasn’t able to face Jack just yet. She was very understanding and it shocked me. I told her I would be back for Trey on the weekend and she told me to take as long as I needed.
My mama was really considerate and supportive. I don’t know why I thought she would be mad or disappointed with me. She made me feel better about the chaotic situation I had created.
I stayed over my mama’s house as long as I could. I had a little time before I had to report back to base camp. I wanted to go pick up some clothes from my house but I couldn’t go home. I was afraid I would run into Jack. I would rather pull my toenails off with rusty pliers than run into Jack.
Mason didn’t want me to communicate with Jack. Mason wasn’t the boss of me. I could talk to Jack if I wanted to. The problem was I knew that it would really hurt Mason. He made that clear to me. The truth is hurting Mason hurts me. My heart literally hurts when I know he’s hurting. I just can’t hurt Mason. Plus I hadn’t figured out what I was going to say to Jack. I couldn’t lie to him like I did with my Mama. He’s much too clever for my
lies.
CHAPTER 7
MASON
I was at my wits end. Being here at work was not where I wanted to be. I was bored out of my skull and I couldn’t keep Kari out of my psyche. I wanted to call her. I wanted to text her but I didn’t want to run her off or overwhelm her. I sat at my desk and just stared down at my cell phone.
Did I scare her with the divorce papers? Maybe I played that card too fast. I needed her to know where I stand. I needed a grand gesture to make up for the deception.
I wonder why she hasn’t called me. I know she’s seen the divorce papers. I know she has her cell phone. I left the papers and the cell right by the bed. Did she call Malibu Ken? Does she love him more than me? I hate this, self-doubt. Is this what being in love is?
Fuck it! I can do what I want to do. I’m going to text her. She better respond. I grabbed my phone and started making my convert move. [Hey how’s it going?] I pressed send. Christ. That sounds stupid. Why did I text that, how’s it going? That sounds lame as fuck.
I placed my cell on the desk. I just sat there thinking of something else I could have texted, something that was more appropriate.
My cell phone vibrated and I held in my impending smile. I checked the text message. [It’s going. Bring food for dinner. You have no food in this big ASS castle at Winterfell.]
My inner smile crept out to my lips. She’s still at the house. That’s a good sign. That’s fucking great. Kari obviously took a look around. I knew she would explore the house. She called it a castle at Winterfell. That’s funny because she has called me the King of the North a few times. I remember how we would cuddle and watch Game of Thrones together. I remember how she would yell at the TV every time someone got beheaded.
I was feeling completely satisfied and really arrogant inside. Suddenly I heard my name being called from the front office. What the fuck is it now?
“Uncle Mason!” RJ’s yell penetrated the walls. I could hear him loud and clear. What the fuck is the problem now? I walked from the back room into the reception area.
Fuck me. Malibu Ken was standing out there in my lobby. The urge to connect my fist with his face was overwhelming.
Jack was planted near the front door. He had a guy with him. I had never seen the guy before but I knew he had to be Jack’s business partner. Kari had described him to me in one of our past friendly lunch conversation. She told me so many things that I used to my advantage. I had been very good at deceiving her. I feel bad about it now but I would do it again in a heartbeat. The end justifies the means and in the end I will be victorious.
