“You’ve got a fever. I think you’d better take your tea and get to bed right now. I have some medicine upstairs you can take. I suggest you visit the walk-in clinic first thing in the morning. That flu medicine has to be administered within so many days of symptoms for it to work.”
“What about Luna?”
That was a good question. What about Luna? Scarlet squeezed her eyes shut and resigned herself to her fate. She’d tried, she’d fought, but in the end, fate won out. “We can handle her until you’re feeling better. I’ve made a lot of progress on my next painting.”
Carroll’s eyes grew wide. “No, no. Maybe I could call someone...”
Scarlet would have none of it. “No arguing. Now get to bed right this instant. Is Luna already down for the night?”
“No, ma’am. Mr. Spencer is playing with her on the deck. I asked him to keep her for a minute while I made tea.”
That wasn’t ideal. Scarlet was hoping the baby was already asleep so she could avoid the nursery for as long as possible, but she would do what she had to. “Okay. The two of us can take care of her until you feel better. Now, to bed!”
Scarlet watched as Carroll reluctantly carried her mug with her out of the kitchen toward her room. She steeled herself for what she had to do and went out to the deck to look for Mason and Luna, the two people she’d been trying to avoid.
The deck was empty, as was the pool. Curious, Scarlet walked around to the gate and steps that led to the beach. There, she found Mason and Luna playing in the sand. She stepped down to the beach, kicked off her shoes and walked through the sand to where they were playing.
The summer sun had finally set, but the sky was still bright and people still walked up and down the beach. There was a nice breeze for a summer’s night, reminding Scarlet that she’d spent too much time working and not enough time enjoying the property they’d worked so hard to afford.
“Look, Luna. Your aunt Scarlet has come out to play with us!” Mason picked up the baby and turned her to face the house where Scarlet was walking toward them.
The baby immediately lit up when she saw Scarlet. She grinned wide and dropped her handfuls of sand to reach out for her.
“Someone has missed you,” Mason said.
Scarlet stopped short, biting at her bottom lip. She ached to scoop the baby up into her arms and cradle her to her chest. To smell the top of her head and draw in the endearing scent that reminded her of nights rocking Evan to sleep.
Instead, she crouched down out of arm’s reach. Holding her during Rachel’s funeral had been hard enough. “I doubt that,” she said in a soothing voice she used for babies. “What are we doing out here?”
“We are playing in the sand. I figured she’s about to have a bath anyway, so why not?”
Scarlet nodded. “Well, it appears as though Nanny Carroll has the flu, so I’ve sent her to bed. This dirty little girl is ours to deal with for the next few days.”
Luna reached down to pick up a little red plastic shovel and then dropped it. “Uh-oh!” she declared. So far, she’d mastered mama, dada, no, uh-oh and dog.
“Uh-oh is right,” Mason repeated. “Are we going to be able to handle her on our own?”
“She’s a baby, not a wild animal,” Scarlet said. “I’m sure we’ll be fine.”
“And what about you?” he asked. His dark blue eyes focused on hers, saying far more than his words ever would. “Will you be fine?”
Scarlet bit at her lip and stood up, dusting sand from her hands. “I guess we’ll find out.”
“Have you gone into the nursery yet?” Mason asked as he followed suit and lifted Luna into his arms.
For a moment, Scarlet was struck by the image in front of her. Her tall, strong Mason casually holding a baby in his arms. It was a simple thing—hardly unusual to any passersby—but it was enough to make her heart catch in her throat.
“No,” she replied, turning away. As her gaze fell on the ocean, she spotted the splash of a pod of dolphins not far offshore. “Look!” She pointed out at the sea.
Mason turned and pointed the animals out to Luna. “Look, Luna. There are dolphins. They’re jumping out of the water. Aren’t they silly?”
Luna’s eyes grew wide and her tiny little mouth formed an O of excitement. She started to clap enthusiastically as they watched them leap out of the water.
“They’re dolphins. Can you say dolphin, Luna? Doll-fin.”
“Dafin!” she exclaimed. “Dafin!”
Scarlet smiled, turning away from one of her favorite creatures on earth to look at Mason and Luna. The two of them together watching the sea with excited grins made her chest ache. This was the life she’d lost. The future she’d never have with him because he’d decided what was best for her instead of asking what she wanted.
“I think our job here is done,” Mason said at last with a satisfied smirk. “She loves dolphins. Next, we just need to get her a baby wet suit and a surfboard.”
Scarlet’s smile dimmed a little. She remembered him making the same threats about teaching Evan to surf. The idea had terrified her at the time, although they’d never gotten that far. “I think she needs to master walking more than a few steps without falling down before she starts shooting the curl, don’t you?”
Mason sighed with feigned disappointment. “I suppose. We need to get her in baby swimming lessons, though. She’s already behind all the kids that started with those ‘mommy and me’ classes. She’s going to be doing the backstroke before her second birthday.”
Scarlet just shook her head and headed back to the house with Mason and Luna on her heels. “Don’t tell Jay about all this. He’ll think you’re out to drown his baby.”
“Don’t be silly, Scarlet. If Luna knows the backstroke, there’s no way she’ll drown.”
* * *
Mason awoke with a start. It took a moment for him to get his bearings in the dark, unfamiliar room. Then, from the crick in his back, he remembered that he was on the futon in Scarlet’s studio.
Then the wail of a baby sounded louder and he realized what had woken him up. He was about to fling back the sheets and go downstairs, but he heard footsteps down the hallway and Scarlet’s soothing voice. “I’m coming, Lulu. I’m coming, baby girl.”
Mason held his breath, waiting to see what would happen. The night before, Scarlet had let him give Luna a bath and put her to bed. In exchange, she’d made some dinner for them both while he was doing it. If he was right, she was about to step into the nursery for the first time in a year.
He got up and crept across the floor as quietly as he could, then peered out the door. Luna’s bedroom was near the foot of the stairs. He saw Scarlet stand there for a moment, just outside the threshold. Then she took a deep breath and stepped inside. After a few seconds, the crying stopped and he could make out the calming mumbles Scarlet said to soothe her.
A few minutes later, Scarlet came out of the bedroom with Luna in her arms. He watched them go into the living room, where Scarlet sat in her favorite chair to rock Luna back to sleep. He remembered her doing the same with Evan. It had worked like a charm every time.
After about ten minutes, he moved quietly down the stairs. “Is everything okay?” he asked in a hoarse whisper.
Scarlet nodded and continued to rock. Luna was snuggled in her arms, already sleeping. “We just needed a new diaper and someone to love on us a little bit.”
Mason settled onto the couch beside her. He watched the way Scarlet looked down at the sleeping baby and immediately understood why she’d chosen to be so closed off the last few days. It was to keep from falling in love with the sweet bundle in her arms. She looked at Luna the same way she’d looked at Evan, as though the sun rose and set on that tiny baby.
He’d thought at first that she just didn’t want to be around her. Scarlet had made
it very clear after they lost Evan that she didn’t want to try adoption again. She couldn’t risk falling for another baby only to lose it. He understood that. He didn’t really think of Luna that way, but he supposed in Scarlet’s eyes it was the same. It wasn’t her child, so she wasn’t going to get attached. Scarlet wanted her very own baby; he knew that. Perhaps spending this time with Luna would light the fires in her to settle down with someone else and start a family.
“Motherhood always did look good on you,” he said without thinking.
Scarlet froze for a moment, staring at him before taking a breath and gazing back down at the sleeping baby. “Christian Dior always looks good on me, too, but that doesn’t mean I should wear it all the time.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” he asked, speaking louder than he expected to.
Scarlet raised a finger to her lips, then gingerly stood up. “I’m going to put her back to bed before I answer that question.”
Mason waited as she returned Luna to her crib and shut the nursery door. When she came back, she beckoned for him to follow her out onto the deck. He stood up and traced her steps, noticing for the first time that she was wearing nothing more than a tiny pink cotton chemise with lacy white trim. It fit tightly to her full bust, then flowed freely over her hips to midthigh. It wasn’t exactly lingerie, but it wasn’t your grandmother’s nightgown either.
He found himself instantly responding to the innocent outfit as though it were some racy black teddy. His pulse started racing and his mouth was suddenly bone-dry. He attempted to lick his lips, but it didn’t help. It only made him think about her lips and how long it had been since he’d kissed them. Too long.
After he stepped outside, Scarlet pulled the glass door closed behind them. The sky was an inky black sprinkled with as many stars as the LA lights would allow. The moon was hovering overhead, almost full, casting a silvery glow to Scarlet’s figure.
“What I meant was that just because something looks good on you doesn’t mean you get to wear it. Motherhood might suit me, but it appears that life may have other plans.”
Mason frowned. “I don’t know why you would say that. You’ve got plenty of time to still be a mother, Scarlet. You’re beautiful and talented... Surely you’ll meet a man who will give you the family that you want.”
Scarlet looked at him as though he’d reached out and slapped her. “Stop saying that.”
“Stop saying what? It’s true. That’s why...” He trailed off. That’s why I left you.
Scarlet crossed her arms over her chest, pressing her breasts up against the deep V of her nightgown. “I don’t know why you think that just because you’re divorcing me I’m going to waltz out the door and find another man I’ll love as much as I loved you. Do you think they just have men lined up at the shopping mall and I pick one out and live happily ever after?”
Mason tried not to note her use of the past tense where he was concerned. He was the one who left, but that didn’t mean he had to like the idea of her moving on. “Don’t be silly,” he said. “I’m trying to be serious here. I don’t want you to give up on your dream of having your own family, Scarlet. Not because of me. You can still have it. Sure, it won’t drop in your lap tomorrow, but you can have it.”
“Maybe. Someday. But I sure as hell can’t move on with you here. It’s so hard to have you here and not think about everything else. About us. About Evan. About what a mess our lives have become...”
“Do you think it’s any easier on me? Christ, Scarlet. The last three days have been torture.”
Scarlet flinched. “This is what you wanted. How has it been torture?”
He ran his fingers through his sleep-tousled hair and then rubbed his palm over his face. “Do you know how hard it is for me to be around you and not want you? I am crazy with wanting you. You’re my wife.”
“I was your wife,” she said in a cold, accusatory tone she’d never used during their marriage. “You left me.”
“I left you because I can’t have you, Scarlet. Not and let you have what you need to be happy.”
She narrowed her gaze at him and took a step closer. “How do you know what I need, Mason? You always do this. You’ve always treated me like I’m a part of the company that you have to manage. You’re always making decisions for me, thinking you know what’s best, instead of asking me what I want or listening to me when I tell you things.”
Mason hesitated in his reply. He knew it probably seemed that way. He did listen. He just didn’t believe her. No matter how many times she said she was okay not having children, he knew it was a lie. She was settling. Because of him. And he wasn’t about to let her do that for something so important. Even when he didn’t like what he had to do, he’d do it because it was in her best interests.
“You bought this house without asking me.”
“I bought your dream house on Malibu. You don’t like it?”
“I love it,” she argued. “But what if I didn’t? You never consult me. You chose our honeymoon. You hired Nanny Carroll without asking me what I thought. You bought me that Mercedes and just left it in the driveway.”
“You don’t like your Mercedes?”
Scarlet sighed. “That’s not the point. The point is that you never consult me on anything. You just make a decision. It’s not just about the car. Or the divorce. It’s everything. You never ask what I want.”
He took a step closer to her, leaving only a few inches between them. When he was this near to her, he could feel the warmth of her skin and her soft breath on his lips. “So what do you want, Scarlet?”
She placed her hand against his chest and looked up at him with her large dark eyes that spoke volumes even as she stood silent. He prayed she couldn’t feel his heart pounding in his rib cage or hear the blood rushing through his veins at top speed. That, combined with the nearby crashing of the waves, was a dull roar that filled his ears. Mason kept his hands at his sides. They curled into fists as he fought to hold still and keep from sweeping her into his arms.
That was the absolute wrong thing to do. Right? He’d distanced himself from her intentionally. Filed for divorce. Moved out of the house. All to give them both a chance to start over. Except he didn’t want to start over. Not really. But being around Scarlet stirred up so many confusing emotions inside of him. Among the desire, he also fought the feelings of inadequacy and frustration that he couldn’t shake. As much as he wanted to be around Scarlet, he also wanted to stay away from her. That wasn’t what a marriage was supposed to be like. He was convinced they would be happier apart than together.
And yet, if she leaned in and kissed him right now, he wouldn’t stop her.
“What if I said I wanted you to kiss me?” she asked.
Mason squeezed his eyelids tightly shut to block out the image of her looking up at him with those full lips and sad eyes. It was as though she could sense his weakness and knew that she was it. Why else would she ask for the one thing he was reluctant to give her? The one thing he was desperate to give her?
The hand on his chest lifted, but before Mason could open his eyes, he felt her palm against his cheek. She softly caressed his face, letting her thumb drag across his bottom lip. “Aren’t you going to say anything?” she asked.
“It’s not what I want to say, Scarlet, it’s what I want to do.”
She moved closer to him, pressing her firm breasts against his chest. Her whole body was perfectly aligned with his, reminding him of how she was the perfect fit for him in so many ways. This close, he had no doubt that she could feel his desire for her through the thin cotton of his lounging pants.
“What do you want to do, Mason?”
He couldn’t hold back any longer. His eyes flew open to look down at her before the floodgates gave way. “This,” he said.
Lunging forward, he scooped her face into his hands an
d pulled her mouth to his. They collided with the passionate force of a nuclear blast. Weeks and months of frustration, tears and need coursed through his veins as he threatened to devour her. Her mouth was open to him and her lips were soft, just as they always were. His hands were nearly shaking with the rush of adrenaline that came from finally being able to touch her again. The taste of her, the scent of her skin, the soft whimper against his lips...it was everything that he’d thought about, fantasized about, in all the weeks he’d lain alone in his new house in the Hollywood Hills. Scarlet was addictive and quitting her cold turkey had left him miserable and wanting.
But wouldn’t this just make it worse?
Fighting his instincts, Mason pulled away, leaving Scarlet unsteady and gasping for breath. What was he doing? They’d gone through so much to put an end to this and here he was, practically attacking her on the back deck. This was why he’d kept his distance from her. Why he needed to continue keeping his distance from her. He had no self-control where Scarlet was concerned.
“What’s the matter?” she asked.
Mason could only shake his head. “Things are so complicated for us, Scarlet. I just don’t think what we’re doing is going to help matters.”
“And lying to everyone while we pretend to be a happy family will help?” With a sad shake of her head, Scarlet turned back to the house and disappeared through the sliding glass door.
With a curse, Mason dropped down into one of the deck chairs. He cradled his head in his hands and prayed that his body could forget just how badly it wanted her.
Four
Despite her late night with Mason, Scarlet found herself awake just as the sun came up. She sat for a moment, reliving the thrill of his kiss and the sting of his words, before she realized she needed to get up and try to put last night behind her. Despite their attraction to one another, which had never waned, he was right about their relationship being so complicated.
Over time, it had simply become one of those situations where being together hurt more than being apart. Seeing each other was just a reminder of everything that had gone wrong. At least for Mason. He intended to maintain his distance while they were stuck in this situation together, and so she needed to respect that, no matter how fast he made her heart race and her skin tingle from his touch. Attraction didn’t solve any of their issues.
The Baby Favor Page 4
