“Devon, what are you doing here?” Tracey, his mom, asked as she wrapped her arms around him.
“Do you want me to leave?” he asked playfully and started moving toward the door.
“No!” She laughed and shook her head. “You know what I meant. How did you even know we were here?”
“He didn’t have a clue until we were already here and I told him,” Elle bragged. “I was finally able to keep a secret from him after all these years we’ve been seeing each other.”
Devon shut his eyes tight and winced, waiting for the onslaught of questions to begin.
“Years?” Tracey’s whirled back to Devon. “You’ve been seeing each other for years, and I’m just now hearing about it?”
Without even looking at Elle, he felt the heartache radiating off her from his mother’s innocent declaration. Elle turned on her heel and started to walk away, but he caught her before she could get away. One muscled arm circled around her waist and pulled her back to his front, holding her firmly against his chest. His other arm wrapped around her, securing his hold. With his chin resting lightly on her shoulder, he kissed her sweetly on the cheek.
“That’s right, Mom. Elle and I have been together since just before her twenty-first birthday. She came to Miami while I was working there, and we’ve been together ever since.”
“You never tell me anything, Devon,” Tracey accused, her finger pointed at him and her other hand on her hip. “I hope you don’t keep everything a secret from Elle like you do from me.”
“Tracey, stop harassing our son. We haven’t seen him in months, and now it’ll be months before he comes home again.” Phil, Devon’s father, affectionately pulled his wife into his arms. “How long are you staying?”
“However long Elle says we’re staying.” He squeezed her gently, attempting to elicit a response.
“Unfortunately, with the tight production schedule, we can only stay a few days. I’ll have to get back to review the script changes, meet with the other cast members, and get my costumes fitted.”
“You’re here now, so let’s make the most of it. We were just about to have dinner, so you got here just in time.” Tanya led the group back to the table and grabbed extra place settings for Elle and Devon while the others began filling their plates.
“That was a subtle change of plans,” Devon murmured under his breath.
“Yeah, well, that was a blatant slap in the face that Tracey didn’t know about me after four years,” she retorted.
Tracey and Tanya carried on a separate conversation that quickly silenced all the other sidebars. With all eyes and ears on them, they continued talking, unaware they held the room’s engrossed attention.
“Mom and I had to have ‘the talk’ the other day. I think that was the hardest conversation I’ve ever had in my life,” Tracey said.
“What do you mean ‘the talk’?” Devon asked.
She met Devon’s inquisitive gaze with a heavy heart. “She’s declining quickly, son. We had to talk about her end-of-life wishes before it’s too late. I needed to know exactly what she wants so we can respect her needs. She already has the burial plot beside Dad, but she didn’t have an advance directive for medical procedures. We completed one together and sent it to all her doctors. Afterward, we hugged and cried for a solid fifteen minutes.”
“I want to be cremated when I die,” Devon announced definitively and impassively. Tracey and Elle both gaped at him over his announcement. “What?”
“You’re too young. Don’t even joke about that.” Tracey shuddered, the mere thought too much to bear.
“I’m serious. Any of us could go at any time. If you needed to know Grandma’s wishes, you need to know mine, too. I want to be cremated—it’s important to me. I’ve left specific instructions that will be delivered to you, but I also want you to hear it from me.”
The conversation continued, taking natural twists and turns, until they had covered a broad spectrum of topics. While Elle joined in, listening to their parents share amusing and embarrassing stories from both her and Devon’s childhoods and laughing along with them, she mentally pieced together the brief glimpses she’d gained into his secret life. The sum of each individual part added up to one disturbing conclusion.
His work is dangerous.
He lives in the shadows.
He avoids photographs.
He hides me from his world to protect me.
He has “in case of death” instructions.
Who is Devon Kane? Do I even know him?
11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
One Year Earlier
“Elle Moore, best known for her supermodel days, had her big break on the big screen with minor, but memorable, secondary characters. Confidential sources have told us that’s all about to change. One of Hollywood’s most influential leading men, Matt Lane himself, has specifically requested Elle be his leading lady in the highly anticipated romantic comedy.
“Filming is scheduled to begin late next month, but the beautiful pair has been spotted together several times already. Is it too early to hope this pairing is more than just great casting? We may be looking at Hollywood royalty in the making. We’ll keep our eyes on this couple and bring you more updates as they become available.”
Watching television normally bored Shadow to tears, but seeing Elle cozied up to Hollywood’s “good guy” on the nightly entertainment news certainly caught his attention. With his eyes glued to the screen, his hands curled into fists, and his nostrils flaring from agitation, he watched Matt put his arm around Elle’s waist and pull her into his side. When she curled into Matt willingly, Shadow’s blood began to boil. But when Matt placed a lingering kiss on Elle’s cheek, Shadow finally moved.
“Hey, Reap. Just wanted to let you know I’ll be away for a couple of weeks. I’ll call you when I get back.”
“No problem. Everything okay?”
“Yeah. Just a few things I need to take care of.”
After he finished talking to Noah, he called Steadman.
“Shadow, my man. What do you have for me today?”
“I’ll be off the grid for a couple of weeks. Don’t send anything my way because I won’t be checking in at all.”
After a few clicks on his laptop, his ticket to LAX was booked. Then he started planning the ultimate destination—and that place didn’t include Matt Lane. With his surprise plans securely in place, he threw his clothes into a suitcase and hurried to the airport. Every element of his actions went against the grain of his personality.
He didn’t make rash decisions. He always carefully planned every move he made.
He only appeared to be spontaneous. Every move and countermove were considered ahead of time.
Logic ruled his mind, heart, and actions. He wasn’t a slave to his emotions. Rational thinking, sound decision-making skills, and careful analysis of every possible outcome had kept him alive in some of the worst places in the world.
All the years of extensive training and having the rules of working undercover drilled into his subconscious evaporated where Elle was concerned. No risk was too great, no stakes were too high, no matter what the cost to himself would be. She was worth it. She was more than worth it—she was the only light he could see at the end of his tunnel.
It appeared the only thing he couldn’t do for her was the very thing she’d asked of him. He couldn’t stay away from her and give her the time apart like she’d requested. He’d stayed away for as long as he could stand, and seeing her happy with another man was the tipping point. There was no doubt he’d pay the price of her wrath when he showed up out of the blue, demanding she see him. Even more so when he sprang the tickets to Jade Mountain in St. Lucia. For two. For two weeks of total seclusion.
His life of secrecy and disappearing with no word for weeks on end had taken an adverse toll on their relationship. Questions gave way to suspicions. The silence between them became deafening. He couldn’t say the words she needed to hear, and she coul
dn’t accept the way their lives had to be.
“Devon.” She’d begun tentatively, and he read the signs of what was to come next. “There’s still so much I don’t know about you. Where you go. What you do. I feel like an outsider in your life, when I want nothing more than to know everything about you.”
“I know you do, Elle. I don’t know what to say to make you feel better about us.”
She wrung her hands, and tears shimmered in her eyes. “This isn’t working for me, Devon. As much as I want it to, as much as I love you, this isn’t the life I want. We need some time apart to reevaluate our relationship and what we want out of it.”
Devon nodded slowly. Not agreeing with her, but giving himself an extra moment to rein in his feelings before he spoke. “Time apart to reevaluate our relationship,” he repeated. “How much time will that take? How much more time do you need apart from me than you already have?”
“I don’t want you to come back until I call you. I don’t know how long it’ll take, but I can’t constantly watch for you to show up and live my life at the same time. The longest we’ve been apart is four months—”
“That only happened once, and it couldn’t be helped. I explained that to you.”
“You did—you said it couldn’t be helped. That’s the only explanation you gave. Knowing how I felt at the end of those four months, I’m guessing I should know one way or another after six months apart.”
“You want me to stay away for six months while you decide if you want me to come back at all?” The timbre of his voice lowered while the volume raised. He ran his fingers through his hair and clasped his hands behind his neck before releasing a forced exhale.
The tears spilled over her lower lids and slid down her cheeks. One quickly followed the previous, soaking her cheeks and leaving her eyes red and swollen. “Yes. But I understand if you’d rather end it now.”
She’s testing me, he thought. Will I wait for her like she’s waited for me so many times? Yes, Elle, I will wait for you however long it takes to prove my love for you.
“Six months it is, then. I’ll stay away until you call. When I hear from you, I’ll run back to your side.”
Unable to walk away without one more taste, he pressed his lips to hers, skimmed his tongue along the part in her mouth, and plunged inside when she gave him the slightest opportunity. Salty tears mixed with the heady flavor that belonged solely to Elle.
With a step backward serving as the foreboding symbol of their relationship, he left her apartment and her life, giving her the time and space she needed. He gave her what she asked of him to prove his love was real. He was willing to do for her what she’d always done for him—wait, and welcome her back with open arms when she was ready.
But seeing her with Matt Lane made him realize that proving he loved her hadn’t been her plan at all. He’d misread her intentions completely. The time of separation was her chance to move on without him, to forget what they’d had, and to leave all the memories of their time together in the past. Moving on would be easier with someone new to occupy her time and her mind.
And her bed.
Then, Matt Lane would be a dead man.
Hours later, the plane landed at LAX, and he made a mad dash to Elle’s apartment. His heavy fist beat on the door, demanding entrance.
“Let me in, or I’ll break the door down and come in anyway. I know you’re in there.”
The deadbolt turned, unlocking the door, and she slowly opened it. “What are you doing here, Devon? I haven’t called you.”
“That’s exactly why I’m here. You’ve tried to forget me, but it won’t work. You love me, Elle. You’ve loved me too long to stop, and I won’t let you just walk away from me without putting up one hell of a fight for you. I tried to give you space and time to come to this conclusion on your own. But you’re too stubborn and headstrong. So if I have to camp out here in the hallway outside your door until you come to your senses, so be it.”
She sighed deeply. “Come on in.”
“Good call,” he replied and stepped into the room. “Now, go pack. We’re going away for two weeks. You won’t need many clothes.”
“Have you lost your mind? I’m not going away with you. I haven’t seen or talked to you in months.”
“That was your idea, not mine. You wanted that, I didn’t.”
“I needed it for my own sanity.”
“Are you happy without me?” He crossed his arms over his chest and dared her to lie.
“No. I’m not any happier at all. I’m miserable, and I’m driving Beth crazy.”
“Beth needs a break from you for two uninterrupted weeks. Come away with me.”
“Bikinis, sand, and surf?” She knew him too well. His idea of uninterrupted paradise would be somewhere warm, with tropical breezes, the bare minimum of clothes, and no cell or internet access.
“You know it, darlin’.”
Elle questioned her sanity while packing her suitcase. He just showed up after more than four months apart, and she was right back in the same position as if they’d never been apart. She couldn’t resist him—didn’t even want to. There was a certain romantic element to the way he insisted they couldn’t remain apart. She wanted to believe him. More than anything she’d ever wanted in her life, she wanted to believe what he’d said. Her heart was convinced, but her mind still had serious doubts their lives would ever progress past the rut they’d been stuck in for ages.
“You won’t regret it,” he said from behind her.
She turned to face him. His hip was leaned against the doorframe, his eyes drinking her in from top to bottom, obviously delighted to see her again. His self-control was at all all-time high. From his heated gaze and darkened eyes, she knew he wanted nothing more than to entangle his body with hers so thoroughly they’d never be separate again. But he was still giving her time and space—in his own way.
“Reading my mind again?” She kept her voice low and quiet. Uncertainty clouded her mind and her judgment.
His thoughtful expression gave her an unusual insight into his thoughts and feelings. “Something like that. I know you, Elle, and while you think you don’t know me, nothing could be further from the truth. You know I always find my way back to you. Even if you question everything else, you know there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”
“Where are we going?” She knew his words were meant to help heal—but they only seemed to cut deeper. She turned back to packing her clothes, anything to avoid his scrutiny.
Before she even felt his presence or his hands on her arms, he’d whirled her around to face him. He held her firmly in his grasp, as if he thought she’d try to escape from him. So many times, he’d almost told her what kept him away. That was one of those times when he wanted to blurt it all out. The covert missions. The classified details. The undercover assignments. He wanted to tell her everything. Would she even believe him? Some of the details of his life and what he’d encountered were beyond belief in the normal realm of civilian existence.
When he’d turned in his resignation to Steadman through the end of watch code, he had hope they’d allow him simply to walk away. No more clandestine missions, infiltrating areas angels feared to tread. No more eluding questions from family and friends. He’d be home for every holiday and special occasion.
He’d had high hopes for a normal life.
The CIA had other plans for him. A highly trained, seasoned assassin who’d had access to every secret the country had, along with those of several other countries, was not someone they were prepared to just let go. When he’d first joined, many members had given him the same dire warning. “You can never really quit the CIA.” He soon realized what they meant: “You can quit when you die.” Since he wasn’t ready for that extreme measure, he answered when they called.
The two weeks away with Elle had been taken without negotiation. He’d learned the best way to avoid having his plans interrupted was not to share them until the very last second. By the t
ime they were in the air, he would be completely unreachable, and all his attention would be hers. Until then, he knew he had to give her more reason to go away with him before she changed her mind. She was on the cusp of walking away from him forever.
“We’re going to spend two weeks away from everyone and everything else in the world. We’re going to discover and rediscover everything about each other all over again. We’re going to remember why we’re together, why we first got together, why we’ve stayed together, and why we’ll always be together. After the next two weeks, if you still want me to leave, I’ll stay away and you’ll never see me again. I guarantee it.”
“Remembering how much I love you and why I do isn’t the problem, Devon. But you have two weeks.” You have two weeks to convince me you love me.
“We have two weeks.” He bent his knees to put them both at eye level. “I can’t wait to steal you away.”
“You picked the perfect time. Filming starts soon on the movie with Matt Lane. When that starts, I won’t be able to get away for several months.”
His eyebrows twitched ever so slightly, but she caught the movement nonetheless. That small gesture gave his thoughts away completely.
“That’s why you’re here. You believed all the rumors about Matt and me being a couple. Unbelievable.” She twisted out of his grip and stepped away. “This is about you claiming what you think belongs to you, isn’t it?”
“No. It’s really very simple. I don’t want to lose you. This isn’t what I want at all—I don’t want us to be apart. And I sure as hell don’t want you to be with another man. But if you’re with me, I want it to be because that’s what you want, too.”
She exhaled sharply, releasing her exasperation as she gripped the suitcase. Her thoughts vacillated between telling him to leave and giving him the two weeks, for no other reason than she’d never have to wonder “what if.” She dropped her chin to her chest and shook her head. “Okay, Devon. Two weeks it is. When do we leave?”
Wicked Shadows (Steele Security Book 5) Page 12
