An hour later, we have it all set, knowing exactly who will wear what and in what order. It’s not my inclination to mess with the clothes at these things, since I usually just provide the hair and makeup, but it’s fun to work with Finch.
“Fucking hell,” Finch says with his phone in hand.
“What?” I ask, hoping it has nothing to do with our event.
“Bliss, sit down. I have bad news.” A nervous sweat breaks out on my upper lip as I grab a chair quickly. “All but one of our models have been booked on a paying job tonight. Someone has set up a shoot to run the same time as our fundraiser. These models are hungry; they need the money when it’s offered more than the experience of a free show.” He returns his attention to his phone, his fingers flying on the screen. “This is pretty bad.”
My stomach clenches in the fist of a frosty giant as I fight back the tears that want to fall in frustration. “This is awful. Finch what are we going to do? It’s so last minute; I’m not sure who we could get to replace them.” Panic swirls in my head, forcing me to look for any way out I can find. It doesn’t look good.
“Don’t worry, I’m already texting a few girls who may be available. You should see if you can get some friends to do it or something. Better to have a girl that has never modeled than not enough.”
“Yeah, you’re right. Okay, I’ll call a few people and get back to you.” I eye the racks of clothes and think who I can ask.
I pull out my phone and dial. “Please tell me you are feeling particularly brave and want to help me out tonight,” I say when Willa picks up her phone.
“Um, sure, I guess. Can you tell me what I’m agreeing to now?”
“My models are no longer available. Someone booked them on a paying shoot today. We need nine girls to walk in the show for us. I need you.”
“Oh, hold up. I don’t model. That’s some scary, body-image issue shit right there.” I can practically hear her shaking her head no.
“You have to help me. I will owe you big time, but I really need you to do this for me,” I beg.
“Damn it Bliss, I hate when you get all desperate and offer me a way to get you to do my bidding. You get roommate chores for a month for this. And my dishes, you have to wash them, too.”
“Yes, absolutely, you got it. Now, I need you to help me find a few more people that would fit sample size clothing. We have pieces up to size six. Even though that’s still freaking little, it gives us some wiggle room. A little height is definitely appreciated, as most of the hemlines will be too long for anyone under five-five.”
“I don’t know if I can convince anyone to do this,” Willa says.
“Just look at it like your very own way to turn the phrase ‘misery loves company’ into a real act. If you have to walk in this show, so do they. Use that as your motivation.”
“You got it, boss. I’ll check in with you soon. I’m off to find minions.”
I sigh in relief when Willa hangs up. At least that’s one other model.
I make a dozen calls and manage to convince two other girls to walk in the show for me without having to offer to clean their homes. Thankfully I have a contact list full of willing models; I just have to find the ones who are available last minute.
“Hey B, I managed to get four more girls. How did you do?” Finch asks, meeting me by the racks of pretty dresses.
“I convinced my roommate Willa, and two more actual models, so three total. We need two more people to fill our lineup.”
Finch looks at me, waiting, and I know what he wants from me. I eye the racks of clothes and touch the blush dress I fell in love with on our photo shoot. If it comes down to it, I will have to walk the runway. My stomach twists as I shake slightly at the thought of being on display like that. I definitely prefer to be behind the scenes at events like this for a reason.
“You’ll do it, right?” Finch asks, running his hand along his head.
I sigh. “Yes, I’ll do it. For my mom,” I answer. “I’m just hoping I don’t have to, and Willa can find a few more people.”
“I really hate that we are forced to call in a second-string set of models because of the shitty situation someone put us in.” Finch scrolls through his phone, checking for texts.
We share a look. “Does this feel personal to you?” I ask.
“A little. It feels like someone went after all of our models, specifically. This is a city full of people who want to get exposure. Why book our girls?”
“Louisa.”
“You think she would do this? How would she even know?”
“Last week I was booked for a job, but showed up to see she had sent someone over from the agency, and the director went with them. She called me earlier this week and offered her help. She asked me to send all of the information over so she could invite her clients and network. I thought she just wanted to help.”
“She does know this is a fundraiser for your mom, who is dying, right?”
“Yeah, or at least I think so. She offered some story about how her cousin or someone died from cancer being the reason she wanted to help me. Whether or not that is true, she still went out of her way to hurt something I am working on.”
“That conniving bitch. Don’t worry, we can get back at her. I’ll tell everyone I know in the industry about this. Shady game playing is not encouraged. As big as the city is, it’s very small town when it comes to knowing everyone in your industry’s business.”
“I can’t believe she wanted to affect my business like this. If all of my models hadn’t shown up when I advertised this as a fashion show, it would look like I couldn’t put together a very good event. Why would anyone hire me to work for them when I seem flaky or unreliable?” I twist my hair in my fingers. It tangles, forcing me to rip my fingers through the delicate strands. I cringe and leave my hair alone.
“Some people just can’t accept any other way but their own. I think Louisa took it personally when you quit The Vaughn Group to go out on your own. She sees you as competition. You scare her.”
“She told me I would regret quitting, and that she couldn’t believe she had wasted so much time on ‘shaping’ me. It was scary how angry she got when I quit. Which is why I was surprised when she offered to help.”
“It’s sad that we can’t take people at face value. Well, if nothing else, now you know for sure never to trust her.”
“Lesson learned the hard way. Hopefully this goes well.”
With that we go back to work. I’m desperately hoping Willa can come through with more models.
My afternoon stretches out, filled with busy work until the models show up. I’ve set up in a back room of the warehouse, my hair and makeup kit spilled out onto a table for easier access. I’ve borrowed one of Finch’s lights to make sure I’m not messing with the fading natural sunshine or the fluorescent overhead lighting. The models who show up are our B-list, but still amazing. I get to work correcting skin and providing a cohesive look that will make the clothes pop on the runway. Bold eyeliner and muted colors draw the focus up to the voluminous, curled hair I have pinned half-up. It’s a simple look that will work with any of the pieces in our collection.
“Hey Bliss, sorry it took me a while. I had to stay late at work.” Willa appears next to my table and bumps my hip with hers.
“I’m just glad you could make it. Were you able to get anyone to come along?” I ask, looking around the room.
“Yeah, I brought Shelby, that girl over there talking to Finch. I know her from college. She fit your requirements and was actually available last minute.” Willa points toward a pretty girl with honey blonde hair who is talking animatedly to Finch. He seems taken by her energy. Without seeing anything else, I know she’s perfect.
“You’re amazing Willa, thank you so much.” I tick off the models who have shown up on my fingers. Nine. It looks like I’ll have to walk after all. Trying not to think about it too much, I sit Willa in my chair and quickly transform her hair and makeup. Shelby, whom I like
instantly, follows her. Not only is she easy to talk to, she’s funny and unafraid of trying new things.
“I told Willa that I had never modeled, so I might as well try now, right?” I nod along with her story as I tease her hair. “I mean, it’s not something I would get to do on a daily basis because I run my family’s car shop. None of the customers want to see me strut my stuff in the garage.” She laughs at the thought.
I’m intrigued by her story, but have no time to really get to know her right now. “Shelby, I really like you. I wish I could spend hours getting to know you, but unfortunately, I have to bust my ass to get everyone looking wonderful. We’ll have to get together after all of this is over and just hang out. Now, I need you to go over to Finch and get into one of those beautiful dresses while I finish my own hair and makeup. Here’s my card. Make sure you get in touch so we can hang out, okay?” I hand her my business card and hope she’ll actually keep in touch.
“You’re really cool too, Bliss. I’ll definitely be in touch. I’m really sorry about your mom. I know how that goes. I lost mine to breast cancer when I was little. It really sucks to not have your mom around when you need her. What you’re doing with this fundraiser is really special. I hope you’re getting as much of her as you can right now. If you ever want to talk about what you are going through, let me know.”
I wrap Shelby in a hug, my words choked up by the tears of gratitude that are fighting to be released. She hugs me back without hesitation. I sniff and clear my throat. “You have no idea how much I appreciate that. Thank you.”
I send her off to Finch and wipe my tears, ready to get down to business. I quickly adjust my makeup to match the rest of the models. I started wearing waterproof everything once I ruined a few faces of makeup. Tonight is no exception. I tease my already curled hair so I can pin it back, and check the time on my phone. Mom should be arriving any minute now.
I head out front and see there are already people arriving, enjoying the wine that Talan provided, poured by the waiters he also arranged. Just one more thing I need to add to his list of amazing attributes. Scratch that—I need to not think about what makes him amazing. Focus on some less-than-desirable qualities. Like the secrets he has no problem keeping from me, only to surprise me with at the worst times.
I still wonder if he will show up tonight. I scan the room quickly, but don’t see him anywhere. I expect to feel relief, but disappointment fills me. I roll my eyes at myself. It was my choice to brush him off when he asked me to make up my mind. I’m still vacillating between embracing him and all he offers, or writing him off completely. Both choices have their own set of problems, making my decision something that wavers moment to moment. I hate this indecision; it’s exhausting. I’m getting pretty fed up with myself, too.
I check my phone and see I have a text from Amy, letting me know she and Mom have parked and are on their way up. I head to the door and meet them with hugs. Amy walks off to grab a glass of wine and leaves Mom and me to talk.
“Oh Bliss, you look beautiful, as always,” Mom says, pulling back from her hug to look me over. “Are you wearing that tonight? Seems a little underdressed, right?”
I brush off her comment and grin. “Just you wait, Mom. This is what I have been wearing all day. Later I get to wear the coolest dress.” I quickly fill her in on our models no longer being available, and the rush to find replacements that led to me being needed.
“Oh sweetie, I can’t wait to see that. Now, where is my favorite new guy? I expected him to be here hanging on your arm already. Did you put him to work somewhere? That is so like you.” Mom looks around for Talan, and I bite my lip knowing I have to disappoint her.
“I don’t know. I haven’t seen him since he dropped me back at the hospital. I’m not even sure if he’ll show up tonight. I was kind of a bitch to him, and he asked me to make up my mind whether or not I wanted anything to happen with us.”
Mom looks at me sternly. “Bliss, why are you still pushing that man away?”
“I haven’t answered him. I’m still trying to figure out what is the better answer.”
“How is there even a question involved? By not answering him, you are making yourself loud and clear. You like him, so see where it goes.” Her exasperation causes her to cough, her shoulders shaking as she reached for a tissue in her purse.
I pat her back and usher her over to a chair to sit her down while I wait for the coughing to subside. “Mom, it’s not that simple for me. I see him as a choice. I either devote my time to keeping my head above water with bills and taking care of you when I can, or being consumed by whatever it is I feel when I am with Talan. Being in his presence doesn’t leave me room to consider anything but him in the moment.” I shake my head as I try to form the right words to explain it. “It’s like my brain goes fuzzy and my thoughts all tune to him. It’s a fun escape for a minute, but then I get a reprieve and realize there is more than some guy that I need to focus on. I don’t like that I lose myself in him.”
“This again? Listen, Bliss, great guys don’t come around all that often, trust me. They also don’t want to wait around for you to get on board. The only thing you can do is seize each opportunity you can, whether it be a business venture, a romance, or a chance at happiness in whatever form it takes. Don’t be afraid, baby. I know that you will spend all the time you can with me. Even if it’s less than you had hoped, it will still be enough for me. You are always enough. And I know you. You can make it all work together because that’s just how you do things. You will fit each piece into your life perfectly, and if something needs to be adjusted to accommodate another, you can do it. Stop being afraid.”
“Don’t make me cry, Mom. I just did my makeup.” I swipe at my eyes, determined not to ruin my freshly applied makeup.
Amy returns with a glass of wine for Mom, allowing me to break away and do a quick round to make sure things are going as planned. I run into Milleigh and Emme, who agree to look after the front of the house while I go back to the models.
My dress is the only one left on the rack when I return. I look around and see these beautiful dresses worn proudly by our models, both professional and otherwise. Willa walks over carefully in sky-high heels wearing a beautiful fitted navy mini dress with long sleeves. It’s embellished with dark beads and crystals, which sparkle when she moves. The color sets off her olive coloring and looks great with her short dark hair.
“Look at you! If I didn’t know any better, I would think you are a professional model,” I tell her as I strip down and carefully slide into my dress.
She whistles as I turn so she can help me with the side zipper. “That’s one fancy dress. You look like a bride.”
“I know, right? I tried this dress on last week and fell in love. It’s probably my favorite thing I’ve ever worn, and it doesn’t even belong to me. I’m hoping that by walking down a runway in this dress, I can sort of fulfill Mom’s dream of seeing me in a wedding dress, since she won’t be seeing me get married.” I fluff my hair and turn to Willa. Her eyes are shining with unshed tears.
“That’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard. I hate that she’s sick and you have to resort to throwing big fundraisers for her, and that she won’t be present for so much of your life.” Willa fans her eyes, keeping her tears at bay.
“I know. It sucks. It’s why I’m trying my hardest to make her a priority, give her all of my attention.”
“I totally get it, Bliss. I know it’s hard for you to balance so much going on in your life. You put your whole heart into everything you do. It probably doesn’t feel authentic if you put less than your whole heart and soul into anything. Like you’re not doing enough.”
“Yes, that’s exactly it. Thank you for giving me the words to explain what I’m dealing with.” I look around and see Finch calling us over. “Looks like it’s time to make our debut as models.” I smile at Willa, hoping to give us both some confidence.
“Really beautiful, girls. Now, I know this is new for
a lot of you, but you should just have fun. Don’t worry about trying to look like a model, or walk a certain way. Just enjoy it.” Finch changes the music from his phone that is connected to the sound system so our runway playlist comes through the speakers. “Remember, we want to sell dresses and raise some money.”
The smile freezes on my face. I completely forgot about the auction aspect of this fundraiser. Not only do I have to manage to walk down a runway without falling on my face, I also have to stand and be auctioned off to the highest bidder once the show is over. Well, the dress will be, but suddenly the idea feels a little too personal. This was a terrible idea.
“Snap out of it Bliss. We’re going next,” Willa says, clapping in my face to get my attention.
I nervously rub my sweaty hands together, careful not to wipe them on my dress. I get in line behind Willa and watch as she leaves the safety of our backstage room. I breathe deeply and hunt for calm. Strangely, I find it when I imagine myself on the back of Talan’s motorcycle, unable to hear anything but the roar of the bike and rush of the wind with his strong body pressed tight against me. I didn’t have to think; I just held on for dear life and knew he would keep me safe. I capture this image and play it on loop as I step out into the crowd.
There is not an actual catwalk for me to walk down. Instead we opted to create a floor-level route through the set up chairs that creates a zigzag shape. This way, the crowd would have ample time to study the dresses from all angles. As I walk through the crowd, I’m not worried about falling, or appearing to know what I’m doing. I remember the calm of riding with Talan, and know that what I am doing is to help my mom. It’s all the inspiration I need to make it through.
I even manage to smile.
Chapter Eighteen
I make it backstage and muffle my scream of excitement. The euphoria of doing something that scared me is all too real. The blood rushing in my ears eases and my smile grows larger as I find Willa in much the same state.
A Taste of Bliss Page 13
