I start to explain about the ‘what if’ of a guy who makes bets with bookies on different coasts, and vaguely mention some of the details about what Stuart is now doing. This doesn’t seem to interest him too much, so I’m feeling good already. Instead of asking me questions, Snell picks up the DVD off of his desk, and starts flipping it around between both of his hands.
The whole story about my hypothetical case is finished and Snell still looks bored. His answer is typical.
“There are people all over this country making bets with bookies every minute of the day. I guess that if we really looked at each case, we could find some law they’re breaking… using the phone lines, using the U.S. Mail, I don’t know, but I’m sure we could find something. But to tell you the truth, we don’t have the time for that small stuff. It’s just not that high on our priority list until someone other than a degenerate gambler complains that he’s been seriously injured as the result of a criminal conspiracy.
“What’s this, a porno movie you brought for me to watch?”
I reach across the desk to retrieve it, but he pulls back and opens the case.
“No Snell, sorry to disappoint you, but unless you think that Warner Brothers is now making porno, that DVD isn’t for you. I didn’t want to leave it in a hot car out in the parking lot. I’m bringing it to a client who wants to borrow it and let his relatives’ kids watch it. But, if you’re really interested in porno, there’s a video store on Lincoln, around the corner from the Marina, where I understand they’ve got a great selection. Why don’t I get you a gift certificate from them, and then you can use it over there.
“Now, can I please have my DVD back? I’d like to get on the freeway before the traffic gets too heavy.”
“I’m afraid not, Sharp. In fact, I don’t even know if you’ll be on the freeway this afternoon. You’re not going anywhere.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Peter Sharp, you are in possession of a counterfeit DVD, and in violation of Title 17, United States Code Sections 501 and 506.”
* * * * * *
Chapter 9
I had a feeling this particular movie was being released on DVD a little earlier than it should be, but I never believed that they’d be openly selling counterfeits on the internet. Maybe that’s why they don’t take credit cards and insist on only direct bank transfers of funds.
Snell is no different than my ex-wife or any other prosecutor in the world. Their first tactic is to totally disarm you mentally with a threat of prosecution. Their next move is to capitalize on your being immobilized with fear and willing to tell them anything they want to know, incriminating everyone including yourself. I’ve seen the game played plenty of times, but don’t particularly feel like playing it today. I hold my hands out across the desk.
“Okay officer, you caught me. I’m guilty. Put the cuffs on my wrists and take me downtown to the Federal slammer.”
No reaction from Snell. He just sits there glaring at me. Since he doesn’t take me up on my offer of surrender, I might as well sit down again and start playing my own game.
“You really think I came up here to waste your time with some cross-country betting scheme? I was wondering how long it would take you to actually discover a violation of Federal law if it was put on your desk, right under your nose. The answer is exactly thirteen minutes. That’s not bad, considering it was handed to you on a silver platter, and you actually played with it for over three of those thirteen minutes before finding out what you had in your hands.
“Now, do you want to continue playing some stupid cops-and-robber game with me, or are you interested in getting after some real bad guys. I haven’t seen you on the front pages recently, so since I’m probably your best press agent, I thought I’d stop by and see if we can get the public interested in you again. Maybe we can revive this sagging career of yours. You know, I wouldn’t be surprised if some of this big money these guys rake in is being used to finance terrorism.”
Ah, the ‘T’ word. This gets a rise out of him, and out of the other two statues standing in his office. If not for the use of that word, you wouldn’t know they were alive.
“All right Peter, enough. You’ve got my attention. Talk to me. Where did you get this DVD, and what are your plans. But before we start, I just want to know one thing. Is anyone involved in this stuff a client of yours?”
The big breakthrough is the fact that he used my first name. I always like to hear that, because it’s a ‘tell.’ Whenever someone tries to get informal, it usually means that they want something from you. He asked a question, so he’s entitled to an answer.
“No, I’m not representing anyone involved in this stuff. I’m here today as an innocent citizen who was taken in by some crooks. I’m writing a website address down on this piece of paper, and if that computer next to your desk is hooked up to the internet, I’d like you to go to this website and see what they’re offering.”
I slide the piece of paper across the desk to him. He hands it to one of his assistants, who promptly pulls up a chair, logs on, and goes to the website. Once the site appears on their screen, Snell nods at the other assistant, who leaves the room.
“I know what you’re doing. You just told your man to find out who owns that URL. I already did that. It’s an offshore company. And I can save you guys some money, too. You don’t have to waste your time ordering one of those DVD’s just to follow the money, because they don’t leave a paper trail.
“If you go further into their website, you’ll see that they don’t accept credit cards. That would be too easy to trace because it would require their having filled out a complete application form to get a merchant approval number. These guys are smarter than that. Instead of credit cards, they ask for your bank checking info and have a wire transfer of the funds directly from your account to theirs. I’m sure that the money doesn’t sit in that first account too long, because it probably gets ping-ponged from account to account, from country to country, while they siphon off funds in each transfer.”
I amaze myself at this instant scenario creation, but these thoughts really had entered my mind when I first placed my order. Snell is deep in thought. I decide to help him out a little more.
“Funny thing, but when I ordered this, it was delivered the very next day… by U.S. Priority Mail. Of course there was no return address, but the postmark did show that it was mailed in San Pedro… about thirty miles away from where we are now sitting.
“That means we aren’t dealing with some guys in a cave somewhere out in Afghanistan. They’ve got roots right here in this town. And that means you should be able to find them. With my help, of course.
“I know that you guys are certain that you can find these crooks without my help, but sooner or later you’re going to need a private citizen who’ll cooperate and front for you, and since I’m already on their customer list, I’m a prime candidate. They’ve got my email address, and I’m already starting to get announcements from them about upcoming releases. Now, if you will please authorize my reimbursement for this DVD and another couple that I will order, we’ll have a chance to see if they’re all dropped in the same mailbox.”
“I can’t authorize small sums like this, but keep track of your expenses and I’ll see that you get reimbursed when the case is over. And please…”
“Yeah, I know. As soon as the mail is delivered to my P.O. box, I’ll put on the gloves, bag it, and let you know to send someone over to get it. By the way, I’ll be needing this one for a few days.”
I reach across the desk and pick up my DVD. The case is empty. His assistant probably took it while we were looking at his computer screen. They obviously wanted to dust it for prints. Snell pushes a button on his desk and the assistant comes into his office with the disc in his hand. Snell looks up at him.
“Anything?”
“Yes sir, there were ‘identifiables’ from at least three different people.”
“Well, one of them is sitting here
at the desk. Give him the disc and let me know if you get any hits on the other two.”
I put the disc in its case and leave. Once again, the game is afoot.
*****
Stuart is pleased to hear that he’s in no danger of imminent arrest, and he’s also glad for the loan of the DVD. I turn down his offer for a late lunch because I know that I’ve got two new messes to take care of - Tony’s and Snell’s. I started the ball rolling with Snell, so now I’ll have to do some investigation. I call the office and leave word on the kid’s answering machine that we’ve got a new mystery to solve. She loves stuff like that, so I’ll bet that by the time I get back to the boat she’ll already be heavily involved in solving the case.
I want to help out a little too, so I call Jack Bibberman and give him a new assignment. I’d like him to find more out about the Volcano Production Company. Someone there wanted Joe Caulfield dead and took the opportunity to frame Tony for it. This doesn’t look like it was a crime of passion, so that leaves only one other alternative: money. Love and money are the two main driving forces for most murders.
So far we already have two of the three requirements that Myra will be wanting to prove up: Means was no problem because all it took was one shot. Opportunity was there because Joe was alone on the soundstage after hours. That leaves motive as the problem. Why would anyone want him dead? I don’t think it was because he was dating a morbidly obese white girl, so there must be some other answer.
My cell phone was switched off while I was in Snell’s FBI office and I forgot to turn it back on when I was at Stuart’s place. Turning it on now, there’s a message waiting for me, and I’m happy to see that it’s someone I was hoping would call. Evelyn. I return her call and apologize for not getting back to her sooner. She wants to get together, so we make plans to try Pollo Meshuga again. Maybe this time Myra will do me a favor and stay off of the television screens during our date.
*****
Walking down our dock I see that Tony is having a meeting on his boat. Every guy he’s talking to has a cop moustache and is wearing polyester, so it looks like he’s busy working on his own case. That’s good, because I can use all the help he can give me.
After a shower and shave, I’ve got about ten minutes to walk over to the corner restaurant to meet Evelyn. As I pass by his boat, Tony motions for me to come aboard.
“Hi Tony, I saw you had a police convention here earlier today. Any results?”
“Not yet, but there will be, I’m sure of it. My guys and I have been investigating cases like this for enough years to know a frame when we see it. The way we have it figured, there was some reason why Joe had to be whacked, and when I came along they saw a convenient patsy. They needed someone from the outside to do it so that after the arrest they could still keep going with the film. That means whoever’s behind it has a vested interest in the film being completed.
“They only brought two new people in on the production after they started, and we guess that you weren’t a good enough candidate for framing, so they waited until you sent them a better one.
“When I came along, they thought that all their prayers had been answered. I fit all the requirements: a cop suspended for shooting black people, a reputation as a racist, and constant conflicts with the black victim. It couldn’t have been better if they wrote it like that. I was perfect, and it only took them long enough to figure how to build the frame.”
“That sounds good Sarge, but do you have any suspects yet?”
“Yeah, as a matter of fact we do.”
“Who? Any names I might recognize?”
“Sorry counselor, but this is an ongoing investigation so I can’t discuss it with you.”
“Are you kidding? What do you mean you can’t discuss it with me? I’m your attorney. I’m the guy who fought to get you back on the picture. I’m the guy who’ll be arguing for your acquittal at the trial. You have to tell me what you’ve got.”
“Listen here Mister Lawyer, there isn’t going to be a trial. I appreciate the fact that you’re on my side and fought to get me back on the picture, but the real reason I wanted to return to the stage was not to be an actor. I had to get back with the production company so I could be on the inside. It was all for the investigation. Right now, I’m the most visible undercover cop in town. I know that you want to win the case, but do yourself a favor. Whoever was behind the murder of Joe Caulfield won’t hesitate to kill anyone else who gets in the way.
“I’m no threat to them now, because they think the murder charge has already taken me out of the game, but you’re another story. If you get too close to finding a skeleton in the closet, they won’t hesitate to whack you. And I don’t want to see that happen, because they’ll probably try to frame me for your death too.”
“So what you’re telling me here is that you want me to mind my own business and stay out of investigating your case, because you’re afraid of getting framed for another murder?”
“That’s about the size of it. Besides, you’ve got a nice little kid on that boat of yours, and I think you should stick around for a while and watch her grow up.”
Well what do you know? I finally found a soft spot. He wants me to think that it’s another frame-up that worries him, but he really wants the kid to have a father figure around. Either way, it looks like he doesn’t give a darn about me. It’s himself or the kid that he’s concerned with. That’s okay, I’ll take any small amount of concern.
Looking at my phony Rolex, a gift last year from Stuart, I see that spending the extra time with Tony has made me perilously close to being late for my dinner date with Evelyn, so I rush off the dock towards the restaurant.
Pollo Meshuga doesn’t offer valet parking, but they do have a nice parking lot with a path leading up to it from our anchorage. On the way to the restaurant I see the Asian Boys walking the other way. I guess they’re on their way to one of the boats to do some work.
It’s just starting to get dark and I see a beautiful new Japanese top-of-the-line SUV pulling in to park. This thing looks brand new and must cost as much as my Hummer, because I’ve seen them advertised on television with a price ‘as low as’ fifty-three thousand. This one looks fully loaded, so with all the accessories and sales tax, it’s probably well over sixty grand. Even more attractive than the vehicle is the driver. It’s Evelyn. I pause for a second to give her a chance to walk into the restaurant. It would be bad form for me to accost her in the parking lot. It’s dark in the corner where she parked, and I wouldn’t want to give her the idea that I’m a stalker.
I catch up to her at the reservation desk, and after a polite peck on the cheek for a greeting, she holds my hand as we follow the seating guy to our table, which is by a window that overlooks that part of the Marina where my boat is docked. Sitting there with that view in front of us naturally leads the conversation to boating. She starts the questioning.
“How do you like living on a boat? My daughter mentioned you said you had one out here somewhere.”
I point to the most recognizable thing near my boat, which is George Clooney’s four-story high vessel. “You see that mega-yacht down the basin over there? Well it’s not mine, but mine is just a few boats away from it. And to answer your question, I like it a lot. It’s quiet and peaceful, and like being in a summer home at the beach.
“Your daughter mentioned that her father used to like boats. What did he do, change his mind?”
“No, he died.”
I did it again. One of these days they’re going to find a cure for foot-in-mouth disease, and I’m going to be the first one in line at the pharmacy. I use my best courtroom training to try and recover from this goof.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know. Well, that makes you the prettiest widow in this restaurant.”
Nice try you jerk, but it didn’t work. Right after the other cure, someone will write a book entitled ‘things I should’ve said,’ and after I’m through at the pharmacy, I’ll be the first one in line at the bo
okstore.
“Actually, I’m not a widow. We were divorced several years before his accident, and he was already involved with another woman. For once, his timing was right, and he died before he had a chance to marry her or change his will, so my daughter and I came out of it quite well. It was really over for the last couple of years while we were married, so there wasn’t too much grieving involved. I wasn’t happy to see him dead, but I wasn’t too happy to see him alive with that bimbo either. I hope you won’t think poorly of me for those feelings, but that’s the way it was. No sugarcoating, just the truth.”
That answers another question. Now I know how she can afford that new SUV.
“How’s your daughter taking it? Does she miss him?”
“At first she was devastated when he died, but after a while it became obvious that he was so involved with his new girlfriend that he just couldn’t spend the time to pay attention to his own daughter. Maybe it’s because the new love of his life was only a little older than his own daughter.”
“If you don’t mind my asking, how did he die?”
“Oh that’s okay, it’s a matter of public record. He was taking a helicopter from the airport to the top of his office building, and the ship’s door was a defective. He fell out. I don’t know what a door like that is, but my lawyers got the other side to admit to the fact that it was defective, and they paid for their mistake. So, along with the insurance policies and sale of the boat and other some other properties we owned, I can now afford to hang around here and meet you for lunch or dinner as often as you want. How does that sound?”
Fortunately, I don’t have to answer because the waiter stopped by to deliver another round of Patrón margaritas. This is starting to look too good to be true. A beautiful and intelligent female with plenty of money, and she seems attracted to me. The last time I got lucky like this I got framed for murder. I’ll ask Stuart to check with his bookies to see what the odds of the same thing happening to me twice in a twelve month period are. I was hoping that the drinks being delivered would create a pause that would give me an opportunity to change the subject completely, but I was wrong. She pushes ahead with the questioning.
Until Proven Innocent Page 11
