“I know,” she cried into his shoulder. “It’s . . . just ... I was ... so frightened when she wouldn’t breathe.”
Her tears came faster and harder, and she laid her head against his shoulder while he gently patted her back in small, round circles.
“I’ve only lost two babies . . . Both were stillborn.” She sniffed and wiped the tears from her eyes. “I’m sorry for crying on you. I’m tired, and this birth scared me. Delivering a baby is such an emotional event, and even though I’m a doctor, I can’t help but get involved with my patients.”
He rubbed her back, holding her close, as the swing gently rocked them back and forth in a soothing pattern.
Tucker stopped the swing, placed his fingers beneath her chin and tilted her face up to gaze in her teary eyes. “I’m so proud of you, Sarah. You’re brave and smart. You saved the life of a baby tonight, and nothing could be more important than that.”
His lips touched her forehead in a gentle kiss, and he leaned back against the swing, pressing her head on his shoulder, holding her in his arms.
“It’s my job, Tucker. Just like protecting life is yours. I love it, but at times it can be draining. Especially when someone’s life is at stake.”
Tucker nodded, his feet moving the swing back and forth. “Rose was lucky. She had the entire family waiting for the birth of this baby. She had the love and support of people who care about her. If anything had gone wrong, she would have immediately been surrounded by the people who love her.”
Sarah nodded. “I know, but carrying a baby for nine months, feeling that tiny person inside of you and awaiting their arrival only to have something go terribly wrong and have the child die is the absolute worst. I pray my patients will never experience such heartache.”
“But that didn’t happen, Sarah. You saved her,” he soothed, still holding her as the swing gently rocked. “Tell me about Lucas’s birth. Who was there for you when Lucas was born?”
She became still in his arms. Why was he suddenly interested in her and Lucas? Why would he care?
“I was alone except for the midwife I had chosen to deliver my son. There was no one waiting,” she said, her voice soft in the darkness, the memory of the pain of being unaided as fresh as if it were yesterday.
The memory of the night Lucas had been born was like a distant dream. “I had it pretty easy right up until the end. When Lucas came out screaming at the top of his lungs, I knew immediately he was healthy.”
“That must have been hard on you, not having anyone you know around you. Not having your husband there.”
“It was the hardest time of my life. I was all alone except for the midwife.”
The words were on the edge of her tongue to tell Tucker the truth, but she hesitated, wondering how he would react. She wanted to share with him the knowledge that he had a son, but fear and exhaustion held her back.
He shook his head. “You’re so brave. I wouldn’t know what to do with a small child. To have someone depend on you for everything. I don’t know if I could have done as good a job as you’ve done with Lucas. I guess that’s why I’ll probably never have a child of my own.”
She took a deep breath. She could not tell him the truth regarding his son now. The knowledge would be like an anchor weighing him down, restricting him from moving around the country like he wanted. Maybe someday ... but not now.
They sat in the swing, the predawn breeze drifting over them. A faint glow could be seen lightening the eastern sky, just as the rooster began to crow.
“I wish I had been there for you. If I had known you were alone, I would have been there for you, Sarah.”
Sarah sighed. No, he wouldn’t have come when Lucas was born. The person he had been back then would never have come just to be with her. He had been too interested in pursuing his own interests.
But the man today—the man who sat holding her in his arms—he might have come to her rescue. But if he had and he learned the truth about his son, he would only leave again.
No! I can’t tell him the truth about Lucas. Not now! Maybe never.
Chapter Sixteen
The next morning everyone but Eugenia and Rose piled into the wagon to take Sarah back to town and pick up a few more baby supplies they suddenly discovered were needed.
“Are you sure you want to leave Rose?” Sarah asked Travis, feeling anxious about him being gone from Rose so soon.
“Well, Rose and the baby are sleeping, and Tanner and Beth have promised me we’ll come right back as soon we pick up the supplies.” He lowered his voice. “And I want to get Rose something special to celebrate the birth of little Desiree Rose.”
“I love that name,” Beth said, sighing as she climbed up into the wagon with the help of her husband. He sat her down in the inside of the wagon.
“Are you comfortable, dear?” Tanner asked.
She smiled at him. “I’ll be fine.”
“Let’s get going,” Tucker said.
Yes, Sarah felt suddenly anxious to see Lucas. She hated being gone overnight from him and couldn’t wait to get back and cuddle him in her arms. She missed him
Tucker snapped the reins, and the wagon rolled out of the yard with a lurch. Sarah sat next to Tucker as the wagon went through the gates of the Bar None.
“So, Travis, how did you do changing your first diaper this morning?” Tanner teased his older brother. He grinned. “Better than you’ll do the first time.”
“I’m not changing diapers.”
“You’ll reconsider when your wife is asleep, the baby is fussing and Mother has stepped from the room. I didn’t want the baby waking Rose. So I changed the diaper, and then Rose woke up.”
Sarah smiled at Travis. “I think your wife is pretty smart. She slept long enough that she didn’t have to change the baby.”
Travis gave Sarah a quick frown. “Well, at least it wasn’t a stinky one. And I did change her.”
“That’s true,” Tucker said. “Wonder what the baby thought of your diapering. How many times did you stick her with the pin?”
“I didn’t! She would have cried, but instead she drifted back to sleep. If you weren’t running off, I’d say let’s see you try to change a squirming slippery baby’s bottom,” he taunted.
An awkward silence fell on the wagon. What did Travis mean if Tucker weren’t running off? Was he going somewhere?
“What are you talking about?” Sarah asked, confused.
Tucker shot Sarah a guarded glance that only irritated her even more. There was something he hadn’t told her.
“Sorry, Tucker, your news sort of slipped out,” Travis said. “Unless, of course, you’ve changed your mind.”
“No, I haven’t,” Tucker said to his brother. “I was going to tell everyone after things settled down from Desiree being born. But I guess I’ll tell you all now.”
Sarah knew before the words ever left his mouth, he was leaving. She tensed as he said exactly what she had been expecting, what she had been dreading.
“I’m taking a job as federal marshal, and I’ll probably be leaving within the next two weeks.”
“Why haven’t you said something before now,” she responded, with more hostility than she intended.
Tucker glanced at her, his expression full of concern “There hasn’t been a good time to tell everyone. I’ve been waiting.”
She swallowed, trying hard to push away the anger she could feel swelling within her.
“Where will you be going?” she asked.
“Oklahoma Territory for a while. Every case will be different, so I’ll be in various towns. The job is exactly what I’ve been wanting.”
“We’ll miss you, Tucker,” Beth said. “You won’t be here when our baby is born.”
“I’ll come home often,” Tucker said, a wistful note in his voice.
Sarah gazed straight ahead “Be sure to take warm clothes. It gets cool there at night.”
Her voice sounded wooden and cold even to her ears.
; “You know you can always come home if this is not what you want,” Tanner said quietly from the back of the wagon.
“Yes, I know,” Tucker said with a quick glance at Sarah.
She knew he was gazing at her, but she refused to meet his eyes. She couldn’t look at him without her whole face revealing the turmoil whirring within her. The rest of the ride into town, she stared straight ahead, not looking at Tucker, whose gaze touched her occasionally. But it was all she could do to control the tears that threatened to slip down her cheeks.
When they reached the hotel, Travis helped Sarah alight from the wagon. She was anxious to get as far away as she could from Tucker. She needed to rest and be with her son.
“Keep Kira hidden until we’re ready to leave town, and then we’ll come back by to pick her up,” Travis said.
She nodded. “Come to Grandfather’s rooms when you’re ready to leave.”
“Okay.” Travis stood there a moment, his hat in his hands. “Thanks, Sarah. Thanks for everything. We couldn’t have done this without you.”
“Delivering babies is the best part of my job. Let me know if you need anything, Travis.”
“I will.”
Travis climbed back up into the wagon, and Sarah watched as the group drove off, heading toward the jail where they would drop Tucker off.
He was leaving town. He was finally going to pursue his dreams, and they didn’t include her.
She had known that sooner or later this day might come, and now that it was here, dismay swelled up inside of Sarah. He would never understand; he would never acknowledge that she loved him.
Sarah stepped into the hotel, not really conscious of the people around her. It was time she gave up on her dreams of the two of them. She had his son, and that had to be enough. Suddenly she was anxious to see Lucas and her grandfather. It wasn’t often she was away from her son, and she had missed tucking him into bed last night and being there first thing this morning to wake him.
Sarah climbed the flight of stairs to her grandfather’s suite of rooms, anxious to spend time with Lucas and maybe catch a nap this afternoon.
When she reached the door, she turned the knob and found it locked. She rustled around in her reticule until she found the key she seldom used and stuck it in the door lock. Turning the knob, she opened the door and entered the room.
“Hello, is anyone here?” she asked, a sudden uneasiness crawling down her spine.
Silence greeted her. She glanced around the empty rooms, at the made beds, the orderly tidiness of her grandfather’s suite. Lucas room looked just like she had left it the day before. His favorite toy, his wooden soldiers, lay in the same position. Sarah knew because she had put them there.
Icy tentacles of fear seized her heart.
Where was Kira? She would not have gone out, would she? The girl knew her life was in danger and would not have ventured from the hotel.
A trickle of fear ran down her spine as she closed the door and hurried downstairs. She all but ran up to the desk clerk.
“Excuse me, but have you seen my grandfather today?” she asked the man on duty.
“No, ma’am, can’t say that I have.”
“Did you see him yesterday?” she asked, knowing her grandfather would have left word for her, knowing she would worry if they weren’t home when she came back.
“Sorry, I didn’t work yesterday.”
She turned away from the counter, her uneasiness growing, panic hovering on the fringes. She walked out of the hotel, not sure exactly where she was going, but certain she had to find her grandfather. She hurried down the street, her fear intensifying as she thought of her sweet little boy.
Sarah found herself at the clinic, only because this was the last place she had seen Lucas and Kira. This was where her grandfather was going to pick them up. The fear that maybe they had waited here all night for her grandfather and he had never shown up caused her to run the last block to Dr. Wilson’s office.
From the outside the clinic appeared the same, nothing out of the ordinary. She put her hand on the doorknob, and the wooden portal swung open. There was no question in her mind that she had locked the door before she left yesterday.
Fear flowed through her veins like a cascading river, causing her to shake. Cautiously she stepped into the clinic. Everything was as she left it, but an unusual silence prevailed. There was no rambunctious child, no soft-spoken woman. It was quiet, too quiet. She walked past the desk and into the waiting room. The shades were pulled down, streaks of sunlight casting eerie patterns in the semidarkness. Her eyes squinted in the dimly lit room as she tried to see through the darkness.
She almost stumbled over her grandfather’s legs where he sat on the floor, his wrists and ankles tied with rope, a gag in his mouth. He made a cry at the sight of her, and she felt her heart lurch into her throat.
“Grandfather!” She rushed to untie the aging man’s feet and hands. She yanked the handkerchief from his mouth. He tried to speak, but his mouth was too dry. He coughed.
“Water,” he croaked.
Sarah jumped up and ran for the water pitcher. She poured a small glass and handed it to her grandfather, who gulped the liquid.
“Sarah, thank God you’re here.”
“Are you okay? Where’s Lucas, Grandpa?”
“I’m all right. But they took Lucas and Kira.”
“Who?” she asked, though knowing the answer to that question.
“That gunfighter and Wo Chan.”
“Oh, God,” she cried. Opium dealers had her baby. He shook his hands and moved his feet slowly. “I’m sorry, Sarah. I left the door unlocked when I came in, and they followed me. They tied me up and took Kira and Lucas.”
“When?”
“Yesterday afternoon, late.”
Sarah started to cry. Her baby must be so frightened. She had to believe he was okay. No one would hurt a child, would they?
“Come on, Sarah, you can’t fall apart on me now. We’ve got to go get the marshal.”
She wiped her eyes. “You’re right I’ve got to get Tucker.”
“I’m a slow old man, and my joints are really stiff. You go ahead without me, and I’ll catch up to you,” he said, pushing her toward the door. “Hurry!”
“You’re okay?” she asked.
“I’m fine. Now go.”
Sarah didn’t need any other prodding. She was out the door. She lifted her skirts and ran as fast as she could.
The two blocks to the county jail seemed to take forever as she hurried past the saloons, the brothels, tears streaming down her face. She was so afraid.
Her feet were running as fast as possible, but they felt leaden, though she knew it could only have taken her minutes to reach the county jail.
She pushed open the door, almost hitting a deputy. “Tucker,” she screamed. “Tucker!”
Breathing hard, she burst into his office where Travis, Beth and Tanner sat. Tucker jumped up and came around his desk.
“Sarah? What’s wrong?”
“Lucas!” She breathed hard, feeling faint knowing she couldn’t pass out “He’s gone. They took him.”
Gasps filled the room, and Beth said, “Dear God! Who took him?”
“What are you talking about?” Tucker asked in shock.
She gasped for air, the tears streaming down her face. “Lucas!” Her anger flared. “Wo Chan took Lucas and Kira.”
“That bastard!” Tucker said, as he reached out and took her into his arms. The comforting gesture was her undoing. She sobbed.
“It’ll be okay. We’ll get him back, I promise.” The tears rolled down her cheeks even faster. She was so worried about her son. “Please, Tucker, don’t let anything happen to him. You’ve got to save him; he’s your son.”
Sarah felt his body tense. Tucker leaned back in her arms and gazed down at her, a stricken look on his face. “My son?”
Dear God, she hadn’t meant to tell him this way. She hadn’t meant to let the words slip out in a room f
ull of people.
“Yes,” she said softly, her tears still flowing. “Lucas is your son. Please find him.”
Shocked silence filled the room as everyone stared at the two of them. Sarah could feel the tension reverberate through the air. The secret was out, and the anger she expected was slowly building.
Tucker’s eyes flared wide, and he ran his hand through his hair. “My son . . . you never told me.”
He stepped out of her embrace, gazing at her in shock, his face hardening. That one night in Tombstone all those years ago and she had never told him. He stared at her, hurt and anger filling him. Thai suddenly he was moving. He scurried around the desk, yanked open a drawer and pulled out a key. He unlocked the gun cabinet behind him and took out the six-shooters he had had made during his gun-fighting days.
Tanner stood, walked to the desk and picked up several of the guns that Tucker laid out. “What’s the plan?”
“Kill the bastard!”
“I know that. But how are we going to do that?” Tanner asked quietly.
“I’m going alone.”
“Oh, no, you’re not,” Tanner replied.
“He’s right, little brother. You’re not going off by yourself. We stick together,” Travis said, picking up one of the rifles.
Tucker gazed at his brothers. “You’re a new father, and you’re going to be a father in several months. It’s too dangerous. I can’t let either one of you help me.”
“And you just found out you’re a father. There’s no way we’re going to let you do this alone,” Tanner replied.
“This man has kidnapped a Burnett. That could be our son or daughter, and you know you’d be there for us,” Travis said.
They were right, but that didn’t mean that he liked what was about to happen. Tucker looked at his brothers for just a second. “Okay, but Lansky is mine. Do we understand?”
“Yes,” they chorused.
Tucker finished strapping on his holster and pushed the revolvers in place. He grabbed his hat and started for the door.
Sarah still stood by the door, and right now he was so angry with her, he didn’t know if he could trust himself to speak. But he stopped at seeing the expression on her face.
The Marshal Takes A Bride Page 23
