Matthew comes barreling towards the pick-up truck with his voice raised before I can step out. “Are you kidding me, Luke? You take Dad’s truck and don’t come home all night?”
I step out and hold up my hands to calm him down. “What’s the problem, Matthew? I’m a grown man. I’m perfectly capable of staying out all night without getting into trouble.”
“Dad’s been wandering around outside searching for his truck half the night. I just now got him calmed down. He was convinced it had been stolen. You’re a selfish son of a gun. This isn’t Nashville. I don’t care how many albums you’ve sold. You need to think about other people for a change.”
Angrily, I toss him the keys. “What the heck, Matthew? I’m not fifteen years old. I didn’t realize the curfew was still in place. What the devil is wrong with you? You’re turning into a crazy person.”
Matthew snatches the keys out of the air and clenches them tightly in one fist until his knuckles turn white. “Where were you? Out at a bar? You’d better not have been drinking and driving in Dad’s truck.” He angrily jerks open the door of the truck.
“No! Of course not!” I tell him. “Just because I’m a country music singer doesn’t mean I drink beer and hang out in bars all day long. I thought you knew me better than that.”
“I don’t know you at all these days,” he replies.
I stand in front of him and fold my own arms over my chest. I hate that he makes me feel ten years old again. “Look, I’m sorry if I’m late.”
“Late? You were gone all night with Dad’s truck. His mind might be bad, but he knew his truck was gone. Every five minutes he’d go to the window and ask me where it was. I’m not kidding. Every five minutes since dinner last night. He was frantic and very upset. In any case, you’re not borrowing it again, you hear me? You’ll have to get a rental car. I can’t deal with this another night. I’m exhausted.”
“I’m sorry, Matthew. I didn’t think he’d mind.”
“Seeing his truck makes him feel secure,” Matthew says. “It’s a constant in his everchanging state of confusion. I keep it parked in the exact same spot so he can see it. If you’d been paying attention, you would’ve noticed him going to peek out the window a thousand times a day.”
“My gosh, Matthew! This is nuts! Can’t you see how out of control this situation is getting to be? You’re running yourself ragged trying to keep him calm. And poor little Lily is scared to death of him. You talk about me not noticing things. Haven’t you noticed what this is doing to your own daughter?”
Matthew points an angry finger at me. “No, she isn’t scared of him. He loves her. He would never hurt her.”
“You mean the way he didn’t leave a big bruise on your arm the other night? Yeah sure, Dad would never hurt her in his right mind. He’d never lay a hand on anyone. But he’s not always himself. I saw the expression on Lily’s face when you were struggling with Dad. She’s scared. You need to face up to reality here. You’re in too deep to see things as they are. You need some real help.”
Matthew rubs an exhausted hand across his face and leans against the side of the truck. “Maybe you’re right,” he says. “I just keep putting one foot in front of the other every day, hoping things will get better. Instead they keep getting worse and I don’t know what to do. Let’s go inside. I’ve already made coffee.” He starts striding back towards the house with me following close behind him. He throws a question back over his shoulder at me. “Are you at least going to tell me where you were?” he asks.
I hesitate for a moment, following him up the porch stairs and into the house. “I was with Ginny. We met for a few minutes. It didn’t work out. That’s all. Then I drove down a dirt road to get some peace and quiet. I fell asleep in the truck. End of story.”
Matthew pauses and turns around. Some of his anger seems to dissipate when he hears her name. He raises his eyebrows. “Ginny? Now why doesn’t that surprise me?”
“Yeah. I ran into her at the drugstore and asked if she wanted to grab a bite to eat after work. I’m sorry I didn’t think to tell you where I was going.”
“Why didn’t you? You think I’d have a problem with it?”
“Honestly, yes.”
Matthew seems genuinely surprised. “Why?”
We enter the house. I can hear the television blaring in the living room where Dad’s sitting. I can smell the morning’s breakfast already cooking. Superman Matthew obviously never sleeps.
“You’ve been pretty hard on me since I got here, Matthew. I thought you’d be angry if I made social plans with a girl away from the ranch.”
“I’ve not been hard on you.”
I raise my eyebrows at him, and Matthew relents. He holds up his hands. “Okay. Maybe I have been a little hard on you, but you don’t understand how tough things have been here. This is a family ranch, yet I’m carrying the weight on my shoulders alone.”
“And I keep offering to help, but you won’t let me,” I argue back.
“You’re offering cash,” he says simply.
“What the heck is wrong with my money? It’s still good in this town, isn’t it? Money can’t fix everything, but it can sure help with some things. You keep blaming me and yet you won’t accept the help that I more than willing to give.”
“Mom and Dad would’ve never taken your money,” he says. “They would’ve considered it to be a handout. You know how much pride they always had in doing things themselves.”
“Do you have any idea how bad that makes me feel? I’m a billionaire and I can’t even help my own family. Why? Am I not a part of this family too? Why is it they were willing to accept your help with the ranch, but not my money? Please explain this to me.”
I sit down at the dining table and rest my elbows on the table. It’s too early in the morning to be arguing over this same issue again. Matthew pours us both a cup of coffee and slides mine in front of me.
“I know you want me back here at the ranch, but I love what I do. I have a successful career that I’ve worked hard for. You don’t understand that I can’t breathe if I’m not making music. It’s part of who I am. I can’t change that. I’ll always be a cowboy deep down in my heart, but I also need to sing. The ranch is in the blood but so is music.”
Matthew sighs and rubs his tired eyes. “I know.”
“I make a lot of money now. Enough money to keep the ranch going through a dry spell or bad weather. Enough money to expand the ranch into whatever you want it to be. Enough money to help you out and make sure Dad is taken care of. Money is how I can help. You said yourself the ranch might be going under. What good will it do for me to quit my high-paying job and come back to the ranch? If the ranch goes under, we’ll all go under with it. That doesn’t make a lick of sense to me.”
“I guess I just don’t like asking my baby brother for money,” he says. “It goes against my pride.”
“Your pride?” I argue. “Now you’re beginning to tick me off. You’ve got to stop feeling that way because I’m getting tired of being made to feel like I’m the bad guy. This is Dad and the family ranch we’re talking about here. My manager is always telling me to invest in things. What better to invest in than my own family? I could pour millions into this place. Think about how many people you could employ in this county. People who need jobs and a way to make a living. Eventually Samuel will come back home from Afghanistan and he’ll need a steady income too. You can’t let your pride stand in the way of the family moving forward.”
Matthew blows out a long breath and nods. “You’re right, and I appreciate the offer of help.”
“Can we sit down soon and talk about specifics?” I ask. “We need to work out a plan. Go over everything and figure this out as a family.”
“If you’re serious, then I’ll get the ranch numbers together. It would be good to talk with someone about it anyway. So how was it with Ginny? Where did you go?”
“We met at the Red Barn Grill. We were having a great time until fans spotted me and
ruined everything.”
“Whose idea was that? Was it a date?”
“I’m honestly not sure.”
“Tell me about it.”
“What can I say? Ginny is still the amazing girl she always was. We had a few minutes to catch up and it was just the same as old times. When I saw her all dressed up, I felt eighteen again. She hasn’t changed a bit. Then, when we started talking, it was so easy. There’s not a lot of people I can talk to these days. I can’t tell you how long it’s been since I’ve had a real conversation with a woman. All they want is to be seen with me or take a selfie to post on social media.”
Matthew is listening closely. I’m wondering if maybe he’s hearing me for the first time.
“Unfortunately, it didn’t take long for me to be recognized. After that, we were swarmed by people wanting autographs.”
Matthew raises an eyebrow. “Ah, yes. I forget that you’re a big deal these days.”
“Go ahead and make fun,” I say, leaning back and crossing my arms. “It’s not easy being in the public eye. It’s the reason I don’t get many real moments with people. I can’t get a second alone. Sometimes it drives me insane.” I wait for some other smart remark from Matthew about how bad my life must be, but he stays silent and waits for me to continue with the story. “I asked Ginny if I could follow her back to her house. Just to talk and spend more time together. She turned me down, and that’s how it went. I should’ve come straight home, but I needed a few minutes alone to think under the stars. I didn’t plan on falling asleep in the truck.”
“I’m sorry it didn’t work out.” Matthew shakes his head in regret. “Ginny’s a great gal. She’s strong and solid. Real wife material, not one of those blonde-of-the-month types I see you posing with in magazines. And she always thought the world of you. Every time I’m in the pharmacy, she asks about you. She tried not to show how thrilled she was when I said you were coming back to town, but I could tell she was excited about it.”
“She was?”
“I believe so. And clearly, you’re thrilled to run into her again, too. Are you going to see her again?”
“I’d like to. She’s going to need some more convincing to agree to it. I’m not planning on giving up easy.”
“She’s a good gal,” he says. “I hope it works out. You’d be a fool to let her slip through your fingers a second time around.”
“Ginny doesn’t want a quick summer fling.”
“Why are you surprised?” Matthew asks. “She’s not a kid anymore. I’ve got a feeling Ginny will want more than that this time. She deserves more too.”
“I can’t stay here in Sweet Rose Canyon,” I say. “I’ve got to go back soon or risk throwing away everything I’ve worked for.”
“The problem with you, Luke, is that you never think about everything else you’re throwing away for your career.”
“Unfortunately, I’m learning that you can’t always have it all,” I say after a moment.
“That may be true, but are you sure you’re making the right choices? You’re willing to give up a chance with Ginny again?”
He says it like a challenge. Considering we’re not as close as we once were, Matthew still knows how to push my buttons. He always knew how much Ginny meant to me. My feelings were never a secret around the house.
“Who knows?” I say. “Maybe it won’t have to be goodbye forever. We’re older now and more mature. She’s a grown woman now. Nobody says I have to leave her behind.”
“And nobody says she’ll blindly follow you either like one of your groupies going from city to city. She’s worked hard to get to where she is, the same as you. If I had to guess, I’d say she wouldn’t be quick to throw her hard-earned college education away to chase a country music star around the country. No matter how much money you have.”
“I know that.”
“Do you? Money isn’t everything. She has solid roots here. A good, steady job, friends, and her family. She’s a respected member of the community. All I’m saying is don’t take her for granted. For you, a short romantic fling might be the stuff of love songs, but for her, it’s just another broken heart. She deserves better. She’s the real deal.”
“Thanks for the brotherly advice, Matthew. You’re absolutely right.” I rise from the table and walk over to pour myself another cup of coffee. Deep down inside I know every word Matthew said is the truth. I can’t ask Ginny to give up the life she’s built for me, and she can’t ask me to give up my music.
I don’t know the solution or even if there is one.
12
Ginny
Misty rushes over to my house after work the next day, bringing all the makings of homemade fajitas with her. We stand together at my kitchen counter. A few months ago, we decided to do a fun dinner at my house every couple of weeks. It’s a good opportunity to eat too much and talk each other’s ears off. Tonight, there is only one thing she wants to talk about.
Luke.
She fixes her eyes on me as she pulls an assortment of tortillas, guacamole and salsa out of her grocery bag and places them on the counter. I can see a thousand questions burning inside her.
“Did you kiss?” she suddenly blurts out, unable to hold the question back any longer.
“Misty!”
She lifts her eyes to mine and grins a wicked, devilish grin. “What?”
“That’s personal. You can’t ask me that.”
“So yes, then. I told you he was still interested in you,” she says. “I called it as soon as I knew he was back in town.”
I roll my eyes at her. “Just because I don’t want to talk about it doesn’t mean we’re an item now. He asked to come back here to my house to talk more and I politely turned him down.”
Her mouth drops open. “Are you insane? Who in their right mind would turn down Luke Collins?”
“Me, because I’m not interested in a summer fling. And that’s all it would be. In a few days or weeks, he’ll be gone again. Getting over Luke was hard the first time. I can’t go through that again. It wouldn’t be worth the heartbreak.”
“You don’t know that,” she argues. “You’re not giving the man a fair chance.”
“What’s your point?” I ask.
“My point is that you’re not over Luke, and I don’t think he’s over you. Why are you so desperate to believe that he’s playing you?”
“It’s self-preservation,” I tell her while slicing the steak for the fajitas. “He’ll be gone soon. What’s the point in reading more into things? It’s only going to make it suck more when he leaves. Then I’ll be left here reading about him and his next hot girlfriend of the month and feeling sick inside.”
“It sounds as if you don’t want to get involved at all.”
“Maybe I want to get involved too much.” I let out a pained sigh. “It’s hard. When I’m with Luke, I’m exactly where I always wanted to be. All I have to do is gaze into his eyes and all those old feelings come bubbling right back up to the surface.”
“What’s the problem then? You should at least give it a chance. How will you know it won’t work out if you don’t try? Turning down a chance with Luke, no matter how small, is dumb. Women would kill to be in your position. You’re letting a golden opportunity slip through your fingers.”
I shake my head. “I know how much it hurt when we broke up the first time, and that’s when he was a nobody. Now, he’s a superstar. When Luke leaves this time, he won’t be so easy to forget. I’m going to see and hear about him everywhere I go.” My eyes travel to the pile of gossip magazines on my coffee table in the living room. I know Luke is featured in no less than three of them.
“The same way you forgot about him last time?” Misty says. “I think you’ve always secretly hoped he’d come back. Now that he’s here, you’re running scared.”
“I’m being cautious because I’d be an idiot otherwise.”
“Forget about that,” Misty says, waving a hand at me. “Life is too short to mess aroun
d. If you want him, you’d better throw caution to the wind and go get him before someone else does. Because trust me, they will. A man like Luke doesn’t stay single for long. Think about that for a long minute.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“Nothing worth anything in this life is easy,” she argues. “You’re making it harder than it needs to be. When are you seeing Luke again?”
“I probably won’t unless he swings by the pharmacy to pick up his dad’s meds. We don’t have any plans to go out again.”
“Well, that’s bad news,” she says with a frown. “For once in your life, you need to stop analyzing things and learn how to live for today. You’re too serious. Your life is passing you by. A handsome, talented man wants to sweep you off your feet and you’re digging your heels in. You should seize the day.”
“I’m scared,” I say, being honest. “What if it doesn’t end well?”
Misty picks up the platter of meat and heads toward the kitchen door leading to the grill outside on the patio. “A better question would be…what if it does?” she says. “Take a leap of faith! What do you have to lose?”
“Everything,” I reply.
13
Luke
My cellphone rings, waking me from a deep sleep. It’s Harry again. No big surprise there. I wait to see if his call goes to my voicemail. It doesn’t, and he immediately rings my phone again which means my voicemail is full. I’ve avoided answering his calls for days and can’t put this off any longer.
“Hello?” I say, after hitting the accept button.
“Luke! Where have you been? I’ve been trying to get hold of you. What’s going on up there in Texas? Is there a good reason why you haven’t returned my calls? Because there had better be.”
Every Good Cowboy Deserves A Second Chance Page 11
