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Contents:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
Epilogue
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Chapter 1
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"You can get pregnant any time, Angela." Her doctor looked up from the test results and smiled across the desk. "You're in perfect health, ready for the procedure."
A little quiver of excitement pulsed through her, then calmed. "I know these donors are screened, but how exactly?" Angela said. She wondered exactly what kind of man donated his sperm for artificial insemination.
"Each donor is tested for disease, abnormal chromosomes, and catalogued by physical characteristics, hereditary traits." Dr. McNair gestured to the booklets, brochures and forms on her lap. "Those will tell you all you need to know."
Yeah, she thought, and how expensive. Each procedure would cost her a tidy sum. And if it took more than two or three, she was looking at some serious debts.
"Are you certain about this, Angela?"
She looked at Joyce, her doctor since she was eighteen, and smiled at the older woman. "Oh, yes." She wanted a baby, a house full of them, and her impatience came from Lord knew where, but it was there. Maybe because she'd turn thirty in a couple of days, and the marriageable men weren't making a beeline to her front door. Or that her sisters were all having kids, and being a doting aunt wasn't enough anymore. Yet it was her job as a late-night radio personality that kept her out of the normal time frame to meet many men. She was asleep when most were awake, and working when people were crawling into bed.
"Well, then, when you make an appointment with the specialist," Dr. McNair said, bringing her out of her thoughts, "I'll fax your records over to Dr. Bashore. She's had very successful results."
"That's what I'm hoping for." Angela stood, said good-bye and left the office. She walked through the hospital clinic and out into the main hall. She moved quickly, guiltily hoping to get out of the hospital before Lucas knew she was here and she was forced to lie. Lie, because she was not going to tell him. At least not until she was pregnant. He wouldn't understand her choices, she knew. Her best friend of fifteen years had a real problem with mothers without fathers. And intentionally getting pregnant without a husband would send him straight through the roof.
Because he'd been the boy without a father and abandoned by his mother during his adolescence. When she'd met him, he'd been ashamed and embarrassed that his parents didn't love him enough to want him and hid the fact behind a tough exterior that took patience to crack. But it was worth it. He was worth it. And although he'd dealt with his feelings and pulled himself up from a lousy beginning to be a great pediatrician, she'd seen Lucas Ryder's old demons come back when it came to single parenthood. Especially because he didn't want children of his own. He'd view her decision as deliberately making life hard on a kid. Like it had been for him.
And he'd try to talk her out of this.
Well, she thought, he could try. But she wasn't changing her mind. Not for anyone. Not even for her best pal.
* * *
Standing at the nurse's station, Lucas made notes on the chart while his charge nurse, Sandy, waited. "I saw Miss Justice a second ago, Dr. Ryder."
His head jerked up. "Here?" He looked past her to the glass doors leading to the main hall.
"You don't have an appointment for another thirty minutes. You might catch her."
Smiling his thanks, Lucas handed the chart back and checked to see if he had his pager turned on as he headed for the doors. Wondering why Angela hadn't stopped in to say hello, he rushed into the main hall, looking left and right, then catching a glimpse of her near the elevators. He worked his way through the people, most stepping out of his way when they saw the white coat and stethoscope, but his focus was on the redheaded woman. Damn, she looked good in the short green summer dress, the fabric shifting over her figure as she walked. Although he'd known her since he was a teenager and wouldn't dare jeopardize his friendship with her, he was still just a man. And she was one good-looking woman. Lord, if the listeners of KROC radio could see their Love Line doctor now, they'd know that her sexy voice matched her looks.
When he got close, he let out a soft catcall. "Looking hot today, Ange."
Angela tensed for a second, caught, then laughed softly as she glanced back. "Today? Yesterday? How would you know, Ryder?" Discreetly she stuffed the booklet and brochures into her handbag. "I haven't seen you for two weeks."
Lucas swept his arm around her waist and kept walking with her down the hall. "I know, I'm sorry. But you were in the neighborhood, why didn't you stop by?"
She elbowed him. "You know I wouldn't just pop in unannounced. Besides, I really don't have time." Glancing at her watch, she moved away.
"Not even for a cup of coffee?"
He looked so abandoned standing near the staff lounge door. Handsome as hell, but alone. Ha, she thought. Lucas Ryder was never lonely. His dark good looks, blue eyes and the aura of danger that hadn't left him since he was a teenager still lured women like ants to a picnic.
She offered an apologetic smile. "Sorry."
Luc didn't know why he was feeling shoved aside, especially when he'd canceled on her and most everyone else because of work often enough. But he got the feeling she was avoiding him just now. And that was not like Angela. She shared everything with him.
"Where are you going in such a hurry?"
"I have to go in and do a promo spot for the Water festival, then pick up my dry cleaning and try to catch some sleep before going to work."
He held up his hand. "I get the picture."
"Good, then you understand."
"Yeah, yeah, the life of a celebrity."
"I'm not famous, Luc."
"But too famous to spend some time with your ol' buddy?"
She sighed, shaking her head over his kicked-puppy look. "Come on, buy me some coffee," she said, looping her arm with his and pulling him toward the staff lounge.
His smile widened as he pushed open the door, letting her go ahead and inhaling her perfume as she passed.
Inside, he went to the coffee service, completely oblivious to the young nurses gawking at him, their gazes shifting between her and Lucas, and Angela could read the speculation in their eyes.
It made her smile. What woman wouldn't want to be linked with a handsome man, she thought, taking the cup and settling into the worn leather sofa.
Lucas sat beside her, placing his coffee cup aside, untouched.
Angela sipped, then winced. "That's awful."
He smiled slyly. "I know."
"So you want to send me into intensive care with coffee unfit for the Marines?"
"No, I just missed you and thought the sad lonely boy routine would get to you."
"It was the whining that got me."
"I don't whine."
"See, there you go again."
He laughed, sinking into the sofa and propping his arm on the back. "I have missed you."
Angela felt his gaze travel over her and wondered why it felt intense right now. He'd seen her at her worst, during different stages in their past, but now, it felt as though he were looking at her for the first time. I'm reading what's not there, she thought. She loved Lucas, like a brother. A brother.
But looking at him now, with his black hair falling down over his brow and feeling those piercing blue eyes skate over her face, she almost hated that he was her best pal.
The thought made her straighten in her seat.
No. It was the same as it ever was between them. They just hadn't had the chance to get together for the past couple of weeks. That's all it was. That's what it had to be.
Smothering her thoughts, she launched into questions about his job. And he was most wil
ling to talk. He loved kids. Loved making them well, loved protecting them. He mentioned his patients by name, told her about the siblings, the parents, and Angela found herself admiring him more that he was one of those doctors that had a really great beside manner and loved not only his work, but the people he treated.
Time got away, and in the middle of the conversation, Angela glanced at her watch, then jumped up. "I have to go."
He stood. "Yeah, me, too." He checked his pager, glad there were no messages. Discarding the paper cups, he followed her out the door. They were near the elevator when she heard someone call his name.
They both looked down the corridor to see a slender, rather busty blonde dressed in red rush up to Lucas. They said hello, and he brushed a kiss to the woman's cheek before introducing them. Angela instantly forgot her name because she couldn't get past the viperous look the blonde shot her. My word. It was cool and assessing, staking out her territory on Lucas like a flag on Mount Everest. Angela was tempted to warn her that no woman could rope and tie Luc Ryder, let alone drag him to the altar. The man had a serious case of no-commitment blues. He just liked telling himself otherwise.
"See you later, Luc," Angela said and stepped away.
Immediately, Luc excused himself from the blonde's side and came to Angela. "We still on for dinner next Thursday night? My turn to get the Chinese take-out and videos."
"It's been your turn for the last two times, Luc. You're making up for dumping me to go save some kid," she teased, rolling her eyes. He chuckled shortly, and her gaze shifted past him to the latest girlfriend. Angela wondered if this one could handle that she and Luc had been best friends since high school. She had her doubts, but kept them to herself. "She's lovely Lucas," she said softly. "But I think you'd best quit mentioning me."
He frowned. "I don't." Not that much, he thought. Did he?
"Yeah, right." She gave him a playful shove. "The minute you introduced me, she got that 'so this is her' look."
"She'll learn." He wondered if any woman would understand their friendship.
"For your sake, I hope so. I've got to go, darlin'."
He caught her arm before she took another step. "What are you doing here, anyway?"
"Annual checkup." That wasn't a complete lie, she thought.
His brows knitted. "Everything okay?"
"Perfect." Ready to be impregnated, she thought, stepping into the elevator and punching the button. Now if she could just find the cash to afford it.
Her gaze on Lucas, Angela watched as the other woman moved closer and touched him freely enough that Angela had no doubt the two had been intimate with each other. It didn't matter that Lucas barely acknowledged his latest conquest. Jealousy speared through Angela like a serpent, startling her. And as the elevator doors closed, she sagged against the wall, wondering when her feelings had taken on such power, and the danger of it to her longtime friendship with Lucas.
* * *
A couple of days later, Angela avoided thinking about her risky spurt of jealousy and talked herself into going out on a date to get some distance. She was tightening her earring when the doorbell rang. She flung the door open, expecting her date. Yet she found Lucas in jeans and a T-shirt, holding a paper bag from a local fast-food chain.
So much for emotional distance, she thought, smiling. "Hi, medicine man."
"Hey, yourself. Whoa," Lucas said in a low growl as his gaze swept down her body, from the black silk sheath dress to the dark stockings and high heels. "You look hot enough to fry my eyeballs."
She smiled, putting on the second earring. His compliments had always been good for her ego. "Thanks, but your timing is lousy." She nodded to the bag.
"Hey, no sweat, I just took a chance and lost. So, who's the lucky guy tonight?" He stepped inside and closed the door.
"Randy Costa."
Luc groaned, leaving the bag on the table by the door. "Good Lord, Ange." Randy had a reputation of sweeping women off their feet and right into his bed. "Why him?"
She paused and looked at him. Luc was so clueless sometimes. "Let me see, he's wealthy, handsome as the day is long, has a good job. He's polite. And…" She gave him a dramatic gasp and a surprised look. "Oh, gee! He asked me." Although she had planned on the artificial means of having a family, she wasn't beyond hoping that Mr. Right was out there somewhere and one more date might reveal him. She'd much rather meet him, fall in love and get pregnant the old-fashioned way instead of in a sterile clinic, alone.
Lucas smirked, leaning on the banister. "And you're running late, again."
"It's a consistency thing I'm working for," she said as she rushed up the staircase. Lucas watched her go and glimpsed the lacy tops of her black stockings beneath her short silk dress. The sight shot a hard bolt of desire right through him. The shock of it made him straighten and frown.
Okay, that was new.
Angela Justice was his best friend, his pal. For nearly fifteen years, for the love of Mike. None of his friendships with men, his softball team buddies, his old college roommates or the doctors at the hospital compared to the long-lasting relationship he had with Angela. She was the only person who'd reached out to him when he was a scared and lonely kid dumped in the local orphanage. And she was the only person who continued to be his friend when he'd scared everyone else off. Even the guys.
Oh, he'd always been attracted to Angela. A man would have to be blind not to see how beautiful she was, but he'd never stepped over the line. Never once made a pass at her. Not that he hadn't wanted to when he was young and his testosterone levels were somewhere on Mars. But he was an adult, in control, and he didn't want to ruin the friendship that had taken him through the worst and best times of his life. He tried putting the instance out of his mind, attributing it to a hard day at work.
Yet when she came back downstairs, her hair perfect, a beaded clutch in her hand along with her shawl, his gaze dropped to her legs misted in black. "You still have the most incredible pair of stems in the county, Ange."
She froze on the last step, a bit shocked by the sultry way he said that. Don't look for what isn't there, she reminded herself. "Why, thank you, darlin'," she murmured a little breathlessly, then went to the hall mirror and plucked at her short red hair.
Luc remembered when it had reached past her waist and it drew the attention of half of their high school football team. Of course, those legs in a short cheerleading skirt might have had something to do with it, too, and he wondered when watching a woman primp got to be so darned entertaining. Then his stomach did a quick jump as she bent and ran her hands up her stockinged legs from ankle to thigh in a motion so innocently seductive he wanted to peel those suckers off just as slowly.
Lucas smothered a groan and wondered what had gotten into him tonight.
"So, is this a passable outfit?"
She did a turn in front of him, and Luc felt his blood pressure rise. "Hell, yes." But she didn't look like his buddy anymore, he thought, frowning more to himself than her choice of clothes. "Where are you going?"
"The Theater on the Green."
Wonderful, he thought. In the dark, hidden by trees, Randy would have a good old time with her. "Be careful."
Angela frowned. "This is not my first date with Randy, and if you hadn't been so busy, you would have known that."
"I know, I know. Sorry. At least you can deck him if he gets fresh."
"Fresh?" She laughed softly. "Lighten up, will you? You sound like Daddy."
"Your father wouldn't let you out of the house looking like that," he muttered under his breath, and Luc decided that he needed a distraction, fast, and focused on the half hung curtains and the ladder in the corner of the living room. "Redecorating?"
"Gosh, you're just so smart. No wonder you're a doctor."
He made a face at her. "I could have helped you with that."
"I left three messages." She checked the contents of her purse as she added, "You were obviously having a rockin' good time with Denise."
> "It was Diane."
She looked up, frowning. "Was?"
"Yeah. It didn't work out."
Her eyes widened. "You were with her just the other day!"
"That's about when it went downhill. I got beeped about two seconds after you left, and she was furious that I didn't have time for her."
"The price of your popularity, Doc," she said sympathetically. "And it could have worked out, Luc, but you never let the relationship get past the first couple of weeks."
He stared accusingly at her. "I do, but my schedule puts a lot on hold."
"So what was the real problem, then?" Angela asked as she snapped her handbag shut and left it in a chair with her shawl. She nodded to the kitchen and he followed, his gaze focused on the sexy curve of her bare back in the low-slung dress. Her skin looked warm and soft.
"Luc?"
He mentally shook loose the erotic fantasy that just flew through his mind and took the beer she was offering. "I told you, she couldn't handle my schedule." This was Ange, his buddy. His only family … well, her and her parents, her brothers and sisters and their brood of kids.
"I could believe that if you were still a resident in San Diego, but that excuse is old now, darlin'." Angela cocked her head and studied Lucas. He'd been a tough kid with a chip on his shoulder when she'd first met him. The new boy.
With his imposing height, his dark looks and icy China blue eyes, everyone had been afraid of him. Except her. She'd seen the loneliness in him, the fear of rejection, and the friendship she'd struck up with him had been worth every second. Even when Daddy tried running him off because he thought Lucas was nothing but trouble about to happen. But it didn't happen. The more they said he couldn't do, the harder Lucas worked to prove them wrong. She was proud of him and his success. Although the "dare to get close to me" chip was about gone, his coming to her after every broken relationship was getting old. Even he was treating her like the Dear Abby of the airwaves.
"Know what I think?"
"If I knew what women thought, Ange, I wouldn't be crying in my beer."
She stole a sip, then handed back the bottle. "The day you cry over a woman, Ryder, is the day I can spin straw into gold." She pushed him out of her kitchen, her hands on his shoulders, fingers digging in to his tense muscles. He moaned, almost purring. "I think you're dating women who like your social status and success more than the fact that you heal children."
HAVING HIS CHILD Page 1
