‘Yes, I do want us to have a brief time on our own,’ she told him, ‘and, no, it isn’t because I feel sorry for you. You’re far too capable to invite sympathy, but you’ve had a bad day.’
‘I won’t argue about that,’ he replied. ‘So, are you going to ring Ruby?’
‘Yes, I’ll do it now.’ And seconds later she told him, ‘They will be round in an hour, which will give the four of us time to have our meal and clear away before they come. Ruby said we needn’t rush back as Hugo is the tops when it comes to reading bedtime stories.’
CHAPTER FIVE
THERE were no tears or protests when they left the children with Ruby and Hugo later that evening. The young ones knew them well enough, especially Hugo, to be happy in their care, and as Laura and Gabriel left the house with instructions from their childminders not to rush back, it had been such a long time since there had just been the two of them that for a few moments they were lost for words, until Laura spoke.
‘There is an open-air band concert tonight at the far end of the lake. You like that kind of thing, don’t you?’
‘Yes,’ he replied, ‘but not tonight. We’ve too much catching up to do. It’s like being on a first date but with baggage in the form of my stay at Her Majesty’s pleasure and a marriage that is floundering.’
‘I didn’t suggest we spend some time together going over old wounds,’ she said flatly. ‘I was hoping we could put them all behind us for a while.’ She pointed to woods, scented and silent at the bottom of one of the fells that swept down to the lake.
The evening sun was still warm and as they lounged on grass beneath the trees Laura was happy to have him to herself for a little while, and she lay back and smiled up at him. It was a mistake. The dark hazel eyes looking into hers were warming as he said softly, ‘Laura, when I said it was like a first date I wasn’t expecting this sort of thing to be on the agenda.’
He had rolled over and was looking down on to her and she said, ‘If you mean what I think you mean, Gabriel, it wasn’t, isn’t, because it would be just sex. For us it was never like that. I brought you here where we would be quiet and undisturbed to have a short time of peace in our lives, and if by me lying on the grass I gave out the wrong signals, I’m sorry.’
‘Don’t be,’ he said levelly. ‘I’ve never forced myself on you and am not going to start now. But I rather think we’ve exploded the peace and quiet that you had in mind, and my determination is that we should discuss our problems, so let’s go, shall we?’
Knowing that he was right, she got slowly to her feet and they travelled back the way they’d come in a silence that was only broken when they arrived back at the house, where Ruby and Hugo were waiting to inform them that after lots of fun in the garden their children had been successfully put to bed.
As they thanked them for their efforts neither Hugo nor Ruby was aware that the evening had been yet another hiccup on the way to peace between them.
* * *
The next morning the sun was still out to charm them and as soon as the children had eaten they were out in the garden, while their parents dined at a slower pace.
It was Saturday and would seem like an eternity if they didn’t find something interesting to do, Laura thought, but after the misunderstandings of the night before there wasn’t a lot she could think of that would lighten the atmosphere, and in no time at all Sophie and Josh were tired of the garden and wanting to go somewhere else.
‘Libby and Nathan are spending the weekend on the island,’ she told Gabriel. ‘They have invited us to call if ever we are sailing in that direction and I’m sure the children would like that.’
She wouldn’t. It would bring back the memory of his return to their world, unexpected and unannounced while they had been having their picnic, but there was no need for him to know that.
He had been quiet and remote ever since Sophie’s upset. She had soon forgotten it, but Gabriel hadn’t. It had been a reminder that past insecurities hadn’t entirely been forgotten where his daughter was concerned, and Laura’s hurts were something he lived with on a daily basis.
Only Josh, happy in his new life with his new friend, seemed to have come out of the painful past without hurt. Laura’s suggestion the night before that they ask Ruby and Hugo to child-sit had lifted his spirits, but after it had turned out to be a non-event the remoteness was back.
Aware of it, Laura wasn’t sure what his reply would be to the suggestion and was surprised when he said, ‘Yes, why not? Why don’t we take one of the passenger launches and stop off at the island for a while? Then pick up another of the boats at the landing stage there and sail to the marina for an early dinner.’
‘That would be lovely,’ she agreed, with spirits lifting, and he smiled a brittle smile.
She rang Libby and Nathan to ask if it was convenient for them to call and was assured that they would be most welcome, so with Josh running on ahead, eager to be with Toby again, and Sophie skipping along between her parents, they set off for the family outing that would occupy most of the day.
* * *
While the children played with Toby, and the two women talked babies, Nathan took Gabriel to one side and told him a bit more about the cancer care clinic that was being built.
‘Where it stands and the land all around it used to belong to Libby’s parents, who had it as a farm. The practice premises were the farmhouse and the land was where the animals were kept.
‘When her mother died her father lost interest in the place. He let it gradually fall into a very poor state and had to sell it, and as the previous practice building was becoming too small for the ever-increasing number of patients, my father, who was in charge at that time, bought the farmhouse and the land to provide a new medical centre in the village, so it is seen as the ideal place to build the clinic, right on our doorstep, which couldn’t be better as far as we are concerned.’
‘I think it’s a terrific project, quite cutting edge in its own way,’ Gabriel told him.
‘I know you have the hearing hanging over your head, but we could really use a man with your expertise. There won’t be any decisions made with regard to staffing the new clinic until the late autumn,’ Nathan told him, ‘though, of course, they will have to start interviewing soon, but I’ll keep you informed.’
‘I would appreciate that,’ said Gabriel. ‘They are dragging their feet at the London end, which doesn’t maker life any easier as I have Laura and the children to consider and whatever I decide it has to be right for them.’
Libby announced that lunch was ready at that moment so any further discussion had to be put on hold, and when the two families had eaten and the children had gone back to their play it was inevitable that the conversation turned to the practice, with three of the adults present working there.
Nathan informed Gabriel, ‘The vicar has had the necessary tests done on his throat and there is cancer of the larynx, so he’s being treated with radiotherapy as a first option. There has been no mention of surgery so far, but time will tell, as it always does.
‘I imagine that he wants to thank you for your quick diagnosis and said he intends calling on you in the near future. He is fervently hoping that he won’t lose his voice.’ As Laura listened to what he was saying, the thing that was eating away at her was back. When it came to intensive treatment or surgery Gabriel would be missing from the ranks of oncology if he didn’t change his mind about giving it up, if those who decided such things from a practising point of view didn’t do it for him.
She would not have asked that sort of sacrifice from him, never had, never would. All she had wanted that day at the hospital had been that he should not forget that she was part of his life just as much as his patients, that she loved him and was willing to share him with them, would endure anything, except being ignored.
They stayed on the isla
nd with Libby and Nathan for a couple of hours then, feeling that they’d butted into their weekend long enough, picked up the next passing launch and sailed to the marina.
To anyone observing them they were an attractive family with the mother golden haired, blue eyed, and the boy by her side with a similar colouring. While the father, darkly attractive, was holding the hand of a girl child who was unmistakably his.
There was the choice of a fast-food eating place at the moorings or a smart restaurant that Gabriel was observing approvingly, and almost as if they were back to the old days for a moment Laura said laughingly, ‘I think that our two young ones would go for chicken nuggets and chips with a can of fizzy drink, in preference to the kind of dishes that were our favourites…if you remember.’
His gaze was holding hers. Of course he remembered. His imprisonment hadn’t been that long.
* * *
That evening they sat in silence on the patio after the children were asleep, watching the sun set over the lake and the outlines of the surrounding fells darken as the light began to fade. It was the kind of moment that once would have brought Laura into his arms, but the memory of the night before and all the other painful moments that had gone before it was still heavy upon her, and leaving Gabriel sitting in the summer dusk she went hopefully to let sleep blot out the uncertainties of the present.
* * *
The morning of their wedding anniversary dawned with grey skies above and when Laura drew back the curtains and saw the weather she sighed. The day wasn’t going to be like times in the past when there had been flowers and presents, going out for a meal, and magical lovemaking, but it would have helped if the sun had been shining and lightened it a little.
Over the last few years the occasion had become less memorable because of Gabriel’s workload, but he’d never actually forgotten it, even if he had been pushed to the limit and his secretary had been brought in to see to the arrangements.
Laura hadn’t minded that too much, had understood the pressures he had been under. Until the unsatisfactory lives they had been living domestically had caught up with them.
She had something to give him to celebrate the occasion and was hoping he wouldn’t read anything into it that wasn’t there. Other than it was a large studio photograph of her and the children in a beautiful silver frame.
When she’d had it done she’d thought that he could read into it what he liked, that it was a reminder of their presence in his life, or a memory of a certain stage in the growth of their children to look back on in later years, or even as a flashback to when she’d made the totally preposterous demand for a divorce.
She gave it to him as soon as they met up in the kitchen before Sophie and Josh appeared for breakfast and as he gazed at it for a split second she saw the raw hurt in him, but it was gone in a flash and he said, ‘When did you have this taken?’
‘It was taken while you were away from us.’
‘Ah, yes, I remember,’ he said, with his voice softening. ‘And I told you not to bring it for me to look at as it would have hurt too much, seeing the three of you so near in the photograph but so far away in reality.’
Without any further comment he began to start the preparations for breakfast. Feeling even less celebratory after that little chat, which hadn’t included any signs of what Gabriel had thought fitted the occasion as a gift for her, she went up to wake the children on what was their last day of the summer term.
* * *
As Laura walked to the practice some time later the thought was there that the situation between her and Gabriel wasn’t being helped by the stress of what was happening workwise.
The refurbishment was under way and not going well, far from it.
She was uneasy about the expertise of the small local firm chosen by the doctors to do the work. New to the area, she had gone along with their suggestion and was now wishing she hadn’t.
Although the builder in charge and his two assistants were a likeable trio, she felt that there were too many tea breaks, too much chatting amongst them, and knew that irrespective of who had given them the contract it was she as practice manager who in the end was responsible for satisfactory completion of the work.
When she’d exchanged chaste kisses with Gabriel before she’d given him the photograph, she’d been determined that the evening ahead would have some lightness to it, even though it might lack the magic of earlier years, and as the day progressed had managed to get to the hair salon in the village in the lunch hour and fit in a manicure at the same time.
If Gabriel wanted her in his bed tonight she would be there for him, she vowed, and would forget for a few hours her hurts and yearnings.
She was the last one to leave the surgery at the end of the day. It had been a quiet afternoon for once, the contractors had left and so had the surgery staff. It was only when she was about to lock the door that she became conscious of water beneath her feet.
‘Oh, no!’ she groaned. ‘Not tonight of all nights!’ Even as she said it she was reaching for the nearest phone to get the builder back, and received no immediate answer.
When at last his voice came over the line and she explained what was happening, he seemed to have no immediate sense of urgency and merely said, ‘Turn the stop tap off, Mrs Armitage, and I’ll check the water pipes in the morning.’
‘You will look at them now!’ she told him with deadly calm, ‘or you will be sacked!’
That got through to him and shortly after that the three of them turned up and announced that they’d been renewing pipework that afternoon and might have made a wrong connection.
‘So put it right, then!’ she told them. ‘And then maybe I can go home to my family.’
They did as she’d asked but it was not to be a rapid repair and when she rang Gabriel with the hands of the surgery clock on half past seven to tell him that she would be at least another hour, she was hoping that he hadn’t set too much store on this special day in their lives and so wouldn’t be too disappointed at the delay in her homecoming.
It was hard to tell how he actually did feel when he answered her call. He just said flatly, ‘So how long have the repairs been going on and why aren’t Nathan and Hugo there to see to it? Have you told them what’s happening?’
‘I can’t get hold of either of them,’ she told him. ‘It’s a lovely evening, they’re probably making the most of it somewhere, and I am the practice manager, Gabriel. I can’t leave the building until I’m sure that there will be no more leakage.’
‘Yes, sure,’ he agreed. ‘So I’ll see you about eight-thirty, then.’
‘Hopefully, yes,’ she replied, and rang off.
* * *
The children were asleep. The table was set with the best china and cutlery, candles were glowing in the centre of it, and it was almost nine o’clock.
No mean cook, Gabriel had made chicken parfait for the first course. It was one of their favourite dishes, and for dessert he intended to produce brandy-snap baskets filled with strawberries and topped with clotted cream.
What was missing was Laura sitting opposite him, sharing the meal, with the ring he had chosen for such an occasion on her finger, but it wasn’t happening like that.
Their lives had turned full circle, he thought wryly. He was waiting for her to come home from whatever was keeping her job-wise. She was the one delayed by necessity, not as serious by far as the things that had prolonged his working day, but the change of circumstances was there, not to be ignored.
How many times must she have gone through this scenario and ended up leaving a note to say that his meal was in the oven, and then gone to sleep beside the empty space where he should have been?
When she came dashing up the drive a few seconds later, mortified to think that their wedding anniversary had ended up as much of a non-event as everything else in
their lives at the present time, he met her at the door and as she stood panting in the hallway told her, ‘It’s all right, Laura. These things happen. The food I’ve prepared will be past its best, but the wine is still chilled and the flowers haven’t yet started to droop.’
‘No, I’m the one who’s drooping,’ she said wearily, ‘drooping with fatigue brought on by the carelessness of others.’
He knew immediately that it wasn’t the right moment to give her the ring. She’d had a catastrophic evening and was exhausted. Cries of delight would not be on the menu, so the jeweller’s box stayed out of sight.
He had flowers and chocolates waiting for her, so she would know he hadn’t forgotten, but the chance to show her how he really felt had been knocked sideways, as had the food, and the atmosphere he’d tried to create.
When she went into the dining room and viewed the effort he’d made to celebrate the occasion Laura was gripped by a sick feeling of dismay.
‘Are you going to dish out the food?’ she asked softly as tears pricked.
‘Just help yourself,’ was the reply. ‘I’ll see you at breakfast’ As her mortification increased, he left her to it, and seconds later she heard the front door close behind him.
Once outside Gabriel walked towards where the lake slapped peacefully against age-old stone, and stood looking out across it as darkness fell, bringing with it moon and stars, and into the midst of his tangled thoughts came the memory of the place that had been his second home back there in London, the operating theatre.
The smell of it was in his nostrils, he could almost taste the tension that was always present, and every part of him needed to be there again, but tonight’s fiasco brought about by Laura being late home had been the climax of all his recent observations about what life must have been like for her before their roles had been reversed.
Turning, he went swiftly back the way he had come, praying that she might still be up so that he could tell her there would be another night, another moment to share, when they might begin to find the way back to where they had once been.
Marriage Miracle in Swallowbrook Page 7
