‘Hey,’ Sidharth said, as he came out from the professor’s room. ‘I got a project.’
‘Yeah. I heard that,’ I said. ‘I can’t say I am very happy for you. Why exactly are you doing this? These are the same fucking professors you have grown up cursing, dude.’
‘I told you. Three-semester vacation at a foreign university! What else?’
‘You can’t get me with that. Tell me. What’s bothering you? And don’t tell me it suddenly struck you that you’re wasting your life!’ I asked.
He thought about it for a little while and said, ‘I had a fight with Dad a few days back.’
‘And?’
‘Remember a year ago we had thrashed that guy? Aman. Vani’s ex-boyfriend?’ he said.
‘Yes, how can I forget? One year, eh? Seems like yesterday,’ I said.
‘It turns out his father works for the same firm as my father’s. He was home a few days back … with Aman.’
‘You are kidding,’ I said. ‘How did he know that you are … you know that your father …? Whatever. How did he know of the connection?’
‘He didn’t. They had just casually dropped in. Aman was shocked to see me. And so was I. He said nothing then, but the next day at office, my dad was on the receiving end of some nasty comments.’
‘What?’
‘Aman’s father told Dad all about what had happened. He called Dad names too. And the next morning, Dad gave it to me in equal measure. Dad said he had never been proud of me. He said I was worthless and wished I was never born. You know how parents are,’ he said, head hung low, walking listlessly.
‘And you think this whole project thing will fix that?’ I asked.
‘I don’t know, but at least I can try to make it better. Give him at least one reason to feel proud because apparently I have failed them as a son. Also, a lot of Dad’s friend’s sons are doing great in their lives, they are going to IITs and Harvard and Boston while I just drive around Delhi on my stupid bike with you.’
‘Excuse me?’ I punched him.
‘You know what I mean,’ he responded.
‘You’re one unlucky asshole. Pretty small world, eh?’
‘Yes. It sure is,’ he said.
No wonder his mood had been off for the last few days. His parents had said some pretty ugly things—and parents always dig out old mistakes and follies long forgotten—and he wanted to prove himself now. Sidharth had never taken shit from anyone, and the only reason he was taking so much from the oldies at the college was because he didn’t want any of it from his own parents!
‘But you do know that I am going to get bored if you spend so much time on projects,’ I said ruefully. I knew anyone who took up such projects ended up working their asses off; their social lives became non-existent, revolving around numbers, calculations and engines.
‘C’mon, man. I will take time out for you.’
‘It is better that you don’t. I want you to see this one through,’ I said. ‘In fact, let me join my CAT coaching too. Then we can at least study together. That should be fun. What say?’
‘Are you serious?’ he asked me.
‘I have to join those classes anyway. I will join it now,’ I said. ‘I’m not sure how studying together can be fun, but yeah, we can give it shot.’
‘Cool. Then let’s go now,’ he said.
‘Now? Where?’
‘What? Where? To get you enrolled. I heard they are doing a special DCE discount this week. It’s massive. Ten thousand off just for students from DCE,’ he said, as he revved up the bike.
‘And how do you know that?’
‘I keep my eyes and ears open, man,’ he said.
‘I am not too kicked about the DCE batch. Why would I want the same people that I study with in college in a coaching class with me?’ I asked, the idea of studying already felt repulsive.
‘Let’s be nerds again!’
As soon as he said that, the old Joy flashed in my head , fat, ugly and revolting, and I wondered if he had changed at all.
‘Ma’am,’ Sidharth said. ‘Ma’am,’ he repeated. ‘Ma’am,’ he said for the third time, trying to catch the attention of the kind lady at the reception who was juggling two phones, new admission forms and the timetables of old students all at the same time.
‘Hi,’ she said.
‘Ma’am! We’ve been standing here for the last fifteen minutes!’ he said rudely.
‘What are you here for?’ she asked.
‘New admission,’ he said.
‘I will just get back to you in a while. Why don’t you sit there and fill up the form like everyone else,’ she pointed out to the waiting couches where quite a few people were doing the same.
‘They will lose business if they keep treating potential students like this,’ Sidharth said loud enough so that she could hear it.
‘Let’s just fill it up,’ I said and pushed him away from the counter. We sat in a corner, huddled up with the other applicants, and started filling the form up. Sidharth picked out a management magazine and started reading; soon he started pointing out management jargon and laughed at the stupidity of it all.
‘Will you just shut up?’ I told him.
‘It’s funny, man! These kids spend tons of dollars studying finance and then blow the economy. How dumb is that!’
‘You guys make aircrafts that crash and kill people, so shut your mouth and let me fill this up, Sidharth,’ I retorted.
Just as I finished filling up the education column, I heard someone call out my name. I looked at the receptionist and it was not her. She was still juggling phones and students. ‘Joy?’ she said. ‘Oh, my God! It’s you. Hi! How are you?’ she smiled.
Fuck! It was the face again. Manika Taneja.
‘Hey, Manika,’ I said. ‘I am good. Good. Very good! How are you?’
Sidharth looked up and waved at her.
‘Hi, Sidharth!’ she said, smiling. Ah, that enchanting smile again!
‘So, what are you guys doing here?’
‘Oh, nothing, we are just thinking of buying this place out. So just filling up a form for that,’ Sidharth had come to kind of hate her after the whole I-have-a-boyfriend incident. ‘Why are you here, Manika? Outbid us? A word of caution, we have lots of money!’
‘Shut up, Sidharth. I am enrolling myself. Third year engineering, so it’s kind of time to start preparing for CAT. Why are you here?’ I asked.
‘Certainly not to buy this place,’ she said and looked at Sidharth, who smirked. ‘I am collecting brochures for my sister. It turns out she doesn’t want to be what I want her to be; she wants to try out CAT, too. Let’s see what happens.’
‘Oh, your sister. She is out of rehab?’
‘Yeah. It’s been a while,’ she said.
It was hard to believe six months had passed since I last saw her. Everything seemed like yesterday.
‘Yes. Long time since we last talked.’
‘You never called back,’ she pointed out.
‘I just got busy with stuff. I am sorry. Plus, I always thought Delhi is a small place and we would bump into each other. I didn’t know it would take us six months!’ I said. I couldn’t help but notice that she looked even better now. Winter or no winter, the redness of her cheeks was permanent.
‘If you are not doing anything, maybe we can catch a coffee later, after this?’ she asked, her voice a little shaky.
I looked at Sidharth and he immediately said, ‘Ohh, don’t worry about me. I have work to do. Very important work. Like always. I will leave right now.’
It was apparent that he wasn’t happy about me going out with her again, and at a certain level, I thought it was a bad idea, too. It took me six months and I still wasn’t over her; she was trouble then, she could be trouble now. But then, turning down the prettiest girl in your life on a phone call is a different thing, and turning her down face-to-face is a different thing altogether. I wasn’t up to the task.
‘So she comes back from the dead?’ I
asked.
‘Yes,’ Joy said. ‘Six months. Just when I was so over her, she made a comeback. And this time, she looked even better than before.’
‘But it’s commendable you held out for six months,’ I said.
‘Yeah. I know, but it wasn’t easy—in fact, there wasn’t a single day when I didn’t feel like calling her and talking to her. But then, I had everything to lose and nothing to gain. Just the thought of her being with someone else was crushing.’
‘So, why did you say yes to her when she asked you out in the coaching centre?’ I asked him.
‘Neeti?’ he said. ‘When I refer to her as the prettiest girl in the whole darn universe, I mean it! It’s not an exaggeration, it’s a plain fact. She is what I say she is; it’s the gospel truth.’
‘Okay, okay. I get it, stop making me feel ugly and hideous. So, what after that?’
‘We went out to a café near the coaching centre,’ he said. ‘And …’
The First True and Everlasting Love—Part 4
‘So where have you been these six months? What has been going on?’ she asked. She ordered cappuccinos for both of us.
‘Nothing really. The usual. College. Classes.’
‘The last time you met me, you said you guys didn’t attend classes anymore!’
‘Now we do. Sidharth wants to go out for a year and study, and hence needs a stronger profile,’ I said. ‘What about you?
How is your sister? All well now?’
‘Yes. She responded well to the treatment and she is now all set to take charge of her life again. She wants to get back on track and so there I was—for her,’ she smiled, and pumped her fist comically; she was still entertaining.
‘Good for her. And are you still dating that guy? The smart, thoughtful guy who was intelligent, ambitious and focused?’
‘I am surprised you remember! It’s strange how we start to see people differently when we are with them. He is nothing of that sort. He is an enormous prick, jerk of the highest order.
Oh, and we broke up. We were going through a rough patch when I met you, and it didn’t last too long. I guess I broke up within a month or so after that,’ she said.
‘Fuck!’ I said. I didn’t want to say it aloud.
‘What?’ she said. ‘What happened?’
‘Oh! Nothing!’
‘Tell me,’ she said.
‘You said you broke up with him within a month?’ I asked, half-smiling and half-laughing; it was tragic and it was funny. It was tragic because all this time I was putting myself through death imagining her with a boyfriend, and it was funny because I am stupid as hell.
‘Why? Yes. We broke up within a month, maybe fifteen days. Why? What’s the matter? You are freaking me out, Joy.’
I couldn’t stop smiling at the irony of the whole situation. If only I had picked up her calls, I would have probably known.
‘You know why I never called you back?’ I said.
‘It would help me a lot, yes, especially now that you are smiling like a maniac!’ she said, half-scared at my strange behaviour.
‘Because I thought you had a boyfriend. And I didn’t want to get into all this,’ I said.
‘So I had a boyfriend. What? And what all this? I am really not getting you. Stop talking in puzzles,’ she said.
‘Look, the thing is, Manika, I am sure that a lot of people have probably said this, but you are very pretty, smart too …’
‘Thank you.’
‘Shut up, I am not finished yet,’ I said. ‘See, you are very pretty, it’s not even funny how pretty you are, and I don’t know if you notice it but people stop what they are doing and stare at you, that’s how pretty you are, but that’s not why I like you so much. Well, like every boy I like good-looking girls, and they are my weakness, and I am not going to lie to you but I am a very vulnerable guy and fall in love pretty easily. But then, you’re so smart and those eighteen hours that we spent together were so incredible! I couldn’t stop thinking about them, and it might sound maniacal, but since then I have read every book you had talked about. EVERY. ONE. OF. THEM. And the funny part is that I like them, a LOT. And every time I used to think of you with someone else, I felt sick, like physically sick. I knew that I couldn’t see you any longer, because I was sure that the more time I would spend with you, the more I would fall in love with you. So, I just stayed away.’
‘But …’
‘I saved my heart from breaking. So I am sorry, but I couldn’t have answered your calls or be anywhere near you while knowing that you were with somebody else. It was just too much for me to take. I know it is creepy, Manika, but that’s what it is like.’
‘Hey, Joy,’ she said. ‘Look at me.’ She tried to make eye contact, as I looked away, embarrassed and shy and almost crying.
‘Yes?’
‘That’s the cutest thing anyone has ever said to me. I wouldn’t deny that it was creepy in portions, but it was cute nonetheless!’
‘Thank you,’ I said.
‘And,’ she continued, ‘you shouldn’t have disappeared.’
‘I am sorry for that.’
‘Why did you think I called you so many times, you fool?’
‘Umm …? No idea.’
‘After I broke up with him, the supposedly smart and thoughtful guy, the only person I thought about was you. And it wasn’t just you who had a great time that day, I had a wonderful time too!’
‘You did?’
‘Yes. You are almost the reason why I broke up with him,’ she said.
‘C’mon. Now you’re kidding.’
‘I am not. We were fighting since long, but after that day and that night with you, I realized that what I had with him was not what I wanted. I wanted more dates like the ones I had with you. I didn’t know whether I wanted you or not, but I knew I didn’t want him for sure. I thought about talking to you about it but you never called back. And then I just thought I was one of the many girls you date. I mean, you know, you are cute and I am sure a lot of girls would like to be with you,’ she said.
‘Believe me, no one, and I mean no one wants to be with me,’ I said.
‘Are you sure?’ she asked with a wicked smile.
‘Unless you want to be!’ I beamed.
‘Maybe,’ she said, shyly.
‘Can you say what all you just said one more time? I need to record it and play it every day for the rest of my life because I am sure it will never happen again,’ I said and she laughed.
And then we both laughed, and we laughed till she had tears in her eyes, and it wasn’t even funny. I kicked myself for staying away from her all these months, and I thanked Sidharth, Sidharth’s dad, his mom, Aman, Vani and everybody who had caused the serendipity.
‘Better late than never,’ I said.
‘Better late than never,’ she said and smiled.
‘Awww, that’s so sweet,’ I said as he grinned from ear to ear.
‘You have no idea how happy I was after that. We went to her place after that.’
‘Oye hoye!’ I interrupted.
‘Shut up, it’s nothing like that. Nothing of that sort happened. And it still was pretty good. We didn’t sleep all night. We just talked, stared at each other, asked each other things close to us and by the time I left her place, it seemed like I had never not known her. It felt like she had always been around. I never felt out of place, never an awkward moment of silence. It nearly broke my heart to leave her place in the morning, and she said she felt the same. It was like we had skipped the part where I should have pursued her, the part where she would have played hard-to-get and got straightaway to the part where we thought about why the hell we weren’t together when we were so good together. It was insane. That night remains my best night ever. I never had smiled, laughed and felt quite so good … There was never a dull moment.’
‘That’s sweet. Yet boring. Skip that! So, when did you ask her out?’
‘I didn’t,’ he said. ‘She did.’
‘What?
Don’t tell me!’ I said.
‘Okay. I won’t.’
‘No, no, no. I meant, tell me everything. When did she ask you out?’
‘It had been a few weeks, maybe even a month, and we kept going on dates, and it was pretty obvious that we really liked each other. She lived in a flat all by herself near her workplace and I spent a lot of time there during that time, and a lot of time meant whatever time I had. Our goodbyes alone lasted a few hours. I just didn’t seem to get enough of her, and and she used to say the same, though I doubted it because I was so much in love with her and she probably did not want to see me disappointed.’
‘And that’s how you fell for her?’ I asked.
‘With me, only after it has been weeks into a relationship do I realize whether I truly love a girl or not … but with her, I knew from the very beginning that it wasn’t a fling or anything.’
‘That you loved her?’
‘Yes. Almost immediately, she became an obsession. I used to count hours and minutes until the next time I would get to see her, being with Manika was all that mattered. She was all that mattered.’
‘And she? She loved you?’ I asked.
‘You seem to be very sceptical about her,’ he said.
‘No, it’s just that this Manika character, she sounds like one of those strong-headed women who don’t fall in love, for whom guys are just like another piece of furniture, and they can live without them,’ I said, trying not to offend him.
‘She was exactly like that. However, with me, she was different. Soon enough, she became my baby, and we made our own little world,’ Joy said and continued with the story. He really loved this girl. He started to tell me about how her one-room apartment was more of a library with a solitary bed and a couch and a study table, the open kitchen, the posters of her favourite movies on the walls, and how they spent hour after hour reading books together.
Ohh Yes, I'm Single: And so is my Girlfriend Page 9
