by Coralee June
“I guess your all-night picnic with Jacob ended in Cyler’s bed,” she sneered while looking me up and down. “How devastatingly scandalous !”
I still wore my outfit from the day before. The thin blue straps became loose and stretched in my sleep, causing one to slide off my shoulder, revealing my generous cleavage. We looked downright disgraceful, despite our formerly innocent intentions. I briefly thought of Cyler’s sleepy yet demanding grasp on my butt, and the heat of embarrassment filled me.
“Get OUT!” Cyler ordered while throwing a pillow at her. Jules laughed as she walked away while humming to herself. I turned to face Cyler, but he avoided my gaze.
“We’ve got to do something about her. I’m making her new home a priority on Kemper’s building list!” His yelling caused me to flinch. I scooted closer to him and bravely wrapped my arms around his waist. Anger spilled through him like a stain, and I desperately tried to fix the blemish that was Jules Black.
I rested my chin on his shoulder and felt him relax under my hold. A small part of me liked that I could relax him. It gave me a sense of power I've never felt before. Eventually, the anger fled his body, and he began to sit without the hold of fury and a monotonous craving formed between us.
“Ignore her, that's what I do,” I mumbled in a gentle tone while breathing in his scent. The hint of smoke stuck to his clothes, reminding me of the infected walker. I pulled away and peered into Cyler’s eyes.
“Did you sleep well?” I asked while scrutinizing his appearance .
“Better than I’ve slept in years, babe.” The reply was followed by a cheeky grin and knowing look. His long hair was crimped and frizzy, showing evidence of his excellent sleep.
“I slept well, too. You make me feel safe, Cy,” I said truthfully, while shifting the blankets over my chest. Cyler eyed me and lifted a hand to adjust the strap of my dress. With tentative fingers, he pulled it higher up on my shoulders. His large hands lingered near my collarbone, lightly stroking the frame of my neck and causing a series of fireworks to erupt and shatter my senses.
“You can’t say things like that to a man, babe.”
“Why not?” I asked, although already feeling the hidden meaning of his words. Once again, I was dancing between the line of what was right and what I wanted.
“Because he just might fall in love with you.” His voice was hoarse and spoke volumes about the intensity of this moment. I felt like Cyler and I were standing on the edge of the cliff, and both of us were daring the other to jump; to admit that there was more between us than friendliness.
However, neither of us leaped and said what we wanted to. We separately got ready for the day, then made our way downstairs in time for a late snack. Awkwardness hung between us like a heavy fog.
After sleeping most of the day away, I felt refreshed despite Jules’ intrusion. Downstairs, Kemper was typing away at the kitchen table, and Cyler immediately began discussing with him plans to relocate Jules into a new home—on the complete opposite side of the province.
Maverick was cooking omelets and taking our orders when my tablet rang throughout the room, causing everyone to halt what they were doing immediately.
The only person that called me was Josiah, and we hadn’t spoken since I was abducted and used as a pawn in the Emperor’s games. Everyone stilled and stared at me, eager to see what I would do. An inner conflict made me pause. Josiah was my oldest friend, but his betrayal still stung .
The guys intently watched as I glided over to my tablet and answered the video call. In another time, I might have excused myself and relished in the privacy and comfort of Josiah, but I didn’t feel those familiar flutters of lust or even familiarity. I didn’t know him, not really.
Besides, even from across the tablet, fear spread through me like a vibrating tone, reminding me of how he clutched me and kissed me without permission. Or how he drugged me and used me in the cruel practices of the Empire.
When the screen came to life, and I saw Josiah sitting in the dark of the basement, I wanted to feel sorry for him. I wanted those delicate whispers of love to unfold upon me, to remind me that it was us—always us. But they never came. He looked disheveled and broken, and my heart felt nothing.
“Hey, Ash,” he choked out in a whisper.
“Hey.” Looking at the dimly lit basement made my stomach churn. It was hard to think that a few short weeks ago, that was my home.
“I have to be careful now when I call you. We can’t talk for long, but I needed to see the birthday girl.” A small smile graced his peach lips, and I let loose the hint of a grin. Even though my heart was hardening, our friendship and care somewhat remained. Josiah always found a way to make me feel special on my birthday. As a young boy, he would sneak chocolates and other knick-knacks wrapped in newspaper into my room so I would have a gift to open.
I checked the date on my tablet and was surprised to see that today was, in fact, my birthday. I then glanced up and saw Cyler glaring at me with eyes meaner than a bee sting. I briefly worried that he was upset that Josiah called.
“You forgot again, didn’t you?” Josiah joked, but the smile didn't quite reach his eyes.
“You know I don’t usually celebrate.” My eyes glided back down to the tablet, ignoring the angry stares from Cyler, Maverick, and Kemper .
“The day you were born is a day that the entire Empire should celebrate, Ashleigh.”
I smiled and was pleased by his words, but once again my emotions felt hollow. There was a time that I might have swooned at his admission, but not anymore. If anything, I was embarrassed by his flirtatious comment, and it made me blush. A cough reminded me that we had an audience, and I kept my expressions under control. Despite all the time, pain, and distance, Josiah still managed to fluster me.
“Normally, I would have a gift for you, but this year I’m just going to have to trust that Cyler or one of your…friends…will take care of it.” He spoke loudly as if knowing that someone was listening in on our conversation.
“Remember the one birthday when we went dancing in the courtyard?” he asked in a hopeful tone that didn’t match his dark and brooding appearance.
I did. Josiah stole a merlot chiffon dress from his mother’s closet, and I clumsily wore it. It was way too big and slipped off my slender shoulders, but I still remembered how Josiah’s eyes swept appreciatively over me. We snuck out at midnight and danced until our feet hurt.
His keen eyes had roamed my body, his hands lingering upon my hips while we danced. It was one of the first nights that I wondered if his feelings mimicked mine. I wondered if he desired me as much as I desired him.
I slowly nodded while puffing air out, pushing a curl that had fallen in my eyes. I was unwilling to answer Josiah's question for fear that everyone would hear the crack of emotion in my voice. It was one of the few memories I had of Josiah before everything went to hell. Before he got engaged. Before he chose his duties over me. Before I got swept away into the Dormas province with my new family.
“I hope one day we can dance together again,” he whispered while looking longingly at me.
“Just tell me what’s going on, Josiah. I can help you. We can help you.” I wanted desperately to understand what was happening. Some twisted part of me still wanted a happy ending for Josiah. I wanted—no, needed to know that he would be okay, despite all this pain between us.
“You can help me by staying as far away from Galla and Lackley as possible. You have no idea what’s brewing.” I noticed his temple angrily throb.
“Then tell me, ” I pleaded once more.
“Stay safe, Ash. I love you.” And with that, the line clicked, leaving an empty screen and my empty heart.
I wasn’t sure how to feel at Josiah’s sudden departure. Sometimes I think he reveled in having the last laugh or leaving me to wonder. I once would agonize over every word he spoke to me and replay in my mind over and over every inflection of his golden tone. But instead, I felt a new feeling at his departure—
relief.
Cyler was itching to say something, and the moment I lifted my eyes to his, it was like a dam breaking.
“I can see here that you’re dealing with some major internal turmoil, but I’d like to pause briefly on this heartbreak to scold you for not telling us that your birthday is TODAY!” Cyler yelled, and the room reverberated with his anger. Maverick and Kemper wore equal looks of disapproval.
“I forgot!” I exclaimed with a shaky voice, still distraught from my conversation with Josiah, and the lack of emotions I felt when seeing his face. My words snapped Maverick into action as he used his tablet to call everyone and let them know that a celebration was in order. He worked with the efficiency of a true leader as he dialed numbers and barked orders.
“Who do we call to bake a cake when it’s the baker’s birthday?” Kemper mused. His usual kind smile was playful as he looked me over. He didn’t seem nearly as worried and stressed as the others.
“Jacob’s got guard duty tonight, but I can make arrangements for someone else to keep an eye out on our prisoners for the night,” Cyler said .
Josiah’s Galla guards were held in a warehouse turned jail on the outskirts of town. Each of the guys, and a few trusted Dormas citizens, took turns patrolling the grounds to make sure they didn’t escape. Even though the disease Maverick infected them with caused them to pass out whenever their heart rate increased, they were still a formidable threat.
“Jacob doesn’t need to give up his shift. We don’t have to celebrate!” I urged.
“Oh gosh, I thought we passed the martyr stage, Cy. Guess we need to remind our girl how special she is.” Maverick smirked while grazing over the term ‘our girl.’
I quietly stood there while they frantically ran around making plans for an impromptu birthday party.
How did I go from forgetting today was my birthday one moment, to a full-blown celebration the next?
Chapter Six
I somehow managed to convince Cyler that the entire town didn’t need to be invited over to celebrate. He originally wanted a party comparable to the summer solstice, but I immediately vetoed that. Still, everyone moved with frantic energy while preparing dinner and dessert for me. I ignored the rushed and whispered calls to some of the local shops as they tried to coordinate, and giggled when Lois scolded them for not planning ahead, until of course, she started scolding me for not telling her about my birthday.
As if attracted to the commotion, Jules positioned herself at the kitchen table and threw out undiluted scorn to anyone within earshot. Her beautiful face twisted into a look of disapproval, and her indignant huffs increased the temperature with each of her scornful remarks.
“I don’t understand why everyone is making such a big deal about this. Even the Walker didn’t remember her own birthday.” Jules snorted, apparently finding herself hilarious. “On my birthday, Jacob was the only one that called.”
“That’s because on your birthday, while you were safe and sound at school, we were dealing with an attack from the Eastern Scavengers,” Maverick said.
“I could have been home helping you all, but then you’d just complain that I was in the way,” Jules countered.
“That’s because you would have been in the way,” Maverick replied. She crossed her thin arms over her chest in annoyance.
“Oh, Jules!” Cyler said with a half-smile while whirling around to face her. His large, calloused fingers were struggling to tie small scraps of string together to make decorative multi-colored streamers. “I’m so glad you’re here. I’ve been meaning to talk to you. I didn’t get the opportunity to chat this morning because, as you’re well aware, I was indisposed.” My cheeks blushed at the reminder of this morning and Cyler's large, perfect hands on me.
Maverick stopped chopping fruit and exchanged a small but pleased smile with Cyler before crossing his arms and angling his body towards Jules, demonstrating a united front between the two of them. I briefly wondered if their family dynamic was usually like this, the two brothers ganging up on their younger sister.
“Since the engagement with Josiah is permanently broken off, I think we need to revisit the terms of your punishment. We gave you a few weeks to settle back into Dormas, but now we must move forward with your disciplinary terms.” The smirk on Jules' face promptly disappeared, and I noticed an echo of fear reflected in her eyes before she slipped into her signature stoic poker face.
“It’s not my fault the engagement is off. That Josiah guy was a total buzzkill. He didn’t even try. He just moped in his room and played on his tablet. Then the emperor came over, and within the hour we were in a transport headed for here.”
I noticed the guys exchange varying looks of concern before bringing their attention back to her. She just confirmed what we already knew; the emperor was behind Josiah’s impromptu visit. I wanted to ask her more about Lackley's intentions but allowed Maverick and Cyler to handle it. But I was more than curious. What hold did Lackley have over Josiah ?
Jacob’s abrupt cough shook me out of my thoughts. His hair was wet as if he just showered, and he wore a form-fitting, button-down shirt tucked into grey slacks that showed off his muscular legs. Our eyes connected, and he smiled before glancing at Jules and walking upstairs. His movements were controlled and stiff with tension.
“To speak plainly, we were all exceedingly disappointed to hear that things didn’t work out with Josiah,” Maverick interrupted with an eye roll. “I know you were excited by the prospect of becoming a Governor’s wife; however, since you’re back on Dormas lands we’ve decided that you are to work in the gardens with some of the new Walkers. We all pull our weight around here, and for too long we’ve allowed you to get by without contributing. You’ve never really had a job. Plus, I think it’s time you move out of the manor. This home is for the Dormas leadership council." Maverick’s face was fierce and unyielding. "Kemper kindly prepared a temporary room for you in the Walker Dorms, and you will be put on the waitlist for a cabin, contingent upon you working well with the other Walkers.”
Jules’ face bloomed a bright red, and her cruel eyes looked me over as if I held the secrets to her banishment and that it was my fault that this was happening to her. I flinched under her scrutiny, and Kemper moved behind me while placing a gentle hand on my waist. His support anchored me, and I was immediately comforted by his presence.
“If this house is for leadership council members only, then why is she here?” she snarled.
“Because she manages our home,” Cyler shrugged, and a slight stabbing pain poked me in the heart. Was that honestly the only reason they kept me around?
“More like she’s the house whore!” Jules barked in frustration, and Kemper gripped me harder against him. I wasn’t sure if he was trying to hold me back from saying anything or if he was holding himself back. I wanted to defend myself but knew it was pointless. Jules was ruthless and stuck in her ways. She couldn’t be reasoned with, and anything I said would be useless.
Huxley, who had been quietly observing our exchange, took menacing strides up to her until his tall frame was standing over her. In a voice so low that I had to strain to hear, Huxley said through clenched teeth, “You better watch your words, Jules. The gardens were a mild punishment compared to what I had planned for you in the mines. Leave within the hour. You’re no longer welcome here. You haven’t been for a while now.”
A small stream of tears began gracefully falling down her angled cheeks, and she peered at Cyler and Maverick with such hurt that I felt an inexplicable urge to defend her, but I bit my lip, knowing that she had a history of lying and being manipulative.
“You both have pushed me away since Mother and Father died. I've spent my entire life hoping you'd one day include me in your little gang, but you never let me in." She gestured to the guys that stood awkwardly around the room. None of them willing to meet her gaze. "One day, you’ll have to stop coming up with excuses for why you don’t want me around.” She puffed out her lower lip then licked
up a stray tear. “Besides, your little Walker whore will go crawling back to Josiah one way or another.”
With a huff, Jules straightened her spine, and all sincerity and softness fled her body. She ran to her room where we heard the slamming of doors and drawers. A small crash caused me to flinch. She was apparently trashing the place.
Once she was out of earshot, everyone exhaled, and Jacob rounded the corner, headed towards me. He pulled me away from Kemper and embraced me in a hug that border-lined on the gray area between friendship and something more. I coughed uncomfortably, still feeling unsure how to act around them all.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Jacob whispered. I wanted to reply. I wanted to reassure him and make him feel confident, but words escaped me. How could I make him see what was so plainly in front of him? They chose him.
“Let the party begin!” Patrick shouted while clapping his hands loudly. The tension was too much, and as usual, he was trying to diffuse the ominous fog that had settled over us. The sudden shift caused Jacob to extract himself from me and a strange chill took his place. I liked hugging him, all of them, way more than I should.
Jacob moved over to the corner of the kitchen and leaned against the wall. He felt separate from us, and I wanted to make him feel included again. His eyes were downcast, and I assumed that he was once again questioning how they were handling the Jules situation and if there was something he could have done differently.
Maverick opened the oven, and a spicy scent filled the air, which made my mouth water. “I made a traditional Ethros dish; I hope you don’t mind. We just started a trade agreement with them,” he explained. Ethros was a hot southern province with spicy foods and temperamental people. Josiah frequently told me about his brief adventures there.
