by Coralee June
I glanced at Jules. Her small arms were crossed over her chest as she stared at the Walkers arguing amongst themselves, and I briefly wondered if this was how most of their meetings went. How did anything ever get done?
“There are never any certainties,” I said to mostly to myself while staring ahead at the podium. But the arguing man heard me and responded.
“What did you say?” he spat with malice while twisting to stare at me.
Huxley growled next to me, and I felt Patrick stiffen on my other side. I wasn't expecting him to hear me, but having his unnecessary fury directed my way had my blood boiling. The angry Walker stared pointedly as if waiting for me to back down, so instead, I stole some false bravado from Jules and continued. “What I mean to say is, if you’re looking for the perfect scenario, you’ll be waiting forever.”
“Who even are you? Are we just letting anyone into these meetings now?”
I wanted to answer, but Madam B intercepted the attention of the room before I could.
“This Walker has been behind enemy lines. She was on stage the night Lackley died. She fought for her life and escaped Ethros with Cavil on her heels.”
A hush filled the space, and shame filled my heart. I didn’t save myself. I wasn’t a hero. I was a girl that got incredibly lucky. My entire life was one big coincidence. A positive happenstance of fate. Immunity. The Stonewells. Dormas. The stars aligned, and I was gifted with what others were not—luck.
“This little Walker was tortured in Cavil’s ivory room. Shocked within an inch of her life,” Madam B's voice went low and dramatic. “Despite being tortured and abused, she overcame that and joined the Resistance once more. She has seen the consequences of defying Cavil first hand and yet is gracious enough to help us.”
Madam B got off the podium and headed towards the crowd, her face had a scripted softness about it that made me squirm in discomfort. Bypassing Huxley, she stood in front of me, only a breath away from my face. I shivered at her nearness, and it wasn’t until she cupped my cheek that she spoke. “If an innocent Walker, a victim of the society thrust upon her, can overcome her fear and do what is right for her people, then why can’t we?”
I swallowed back the bile that rose in my throat at her theatrics. She pulled away and spun around to address everyone once more. With each word, her voice rose in volume and intensity. “At the end of the month, my army of Companions, led by their queen,” she gestured to me, “will end the divide between Walker and Elite. There will be fire in the streets of Galla, and riots in all of Dasos.”
Madam B clenched her fists and punched the air above her. Claps reverberated around the concrete basement, and I watched her rally the troops. Was I the only one that saw her smug smile? Was I the only one that questioned her motives? Jules’ words echoed in my mind. “Everyone wants power or money…”
I turned to stare at Jade. She was fuming, and I couldn’t blame her. She’d be the one to ultimately do the hardest job, but Madam B was rallying the troops for me.
It was still strange taking in the anger of the Resistance. They were fueled by revenge, an accumulation of the dissatisfaction they felt for this government and their place in this world. Madam B used their anger to her advantage, convincing them to fight an uncertain battle.
I stared at the stage as Louis grabbed the microphone, jolting everyone out of the momentary camaraderie. “Elite coming!” he hissed while scanning his tablet. Madam B moved with precision towards me as Tallis ran to a side door. Opening it, he revealed a small tunnel that I assumed led outside. The small crowd filed out, each man pushing and shoving at one another to flee as Madam B grabbed my elbow. I winced at her hard grip as she tried pulling me upstairs to the sitting room.
“Where do you think you’re taking her?” Huxley growled out while reaching for my free arm.
“The others are helping remove the evidence of our meeting.” I looked around as the Companions efficiently removed the folding chairs and podium. Shuffling feet stomped loudly along the concrete floor. It was as if they had practiced this many times before. “I need a girl in the sitting room in case they’ve come to call upon a Companion,” Madam B hissed.
Dread swirled in my gut. I wasn’t ready for this, was I?
“Absolutely not,” Huxley replied while yanking me out of her grip and towards his chest. I collided with him, resting my palms on his pecs. For a moment, the room wasn't in chaos, and I wasn't on the verge of panic. It was just Huxley and me.
“I won’t let them take her to the third floor, you idiot. I’ll come up with an excuse of why she can’t, but I need at least one of them with me. You can wait in the hallway if you’re so worried.”
Huxley looked around the room for another moment, debating Madam B’s words while stroking my hair contemplatively. Before letting me go, he firmly said, “Fine. But if I think anything strange is happening, we’re out.”
Madam B didn’t waste any time arguing with Huxley, she merely regained her hold on my arm and yanked me up the short flight of stairs leading to the main floor. Taking a moment to smooth my hair with her fingers and adjust my dress at the nape, she then eased her breathing before guiding me towards the entryway where a man was standing.
“Ah, Master,” she said in a sultry, low tone. “How may I be of assistance?”
My eyes locked onto the Heat strapped to his hip and the orange and black uniform draped over his bulky frame. From what I could tell, he was a member of Cavil's guard.
“I’ve been told this is the best brothel in the Zone, am I correct?” he asked. The guardsman wore his thin hair slicked back. Patches of his white scalp peeked through the thin strands which were greasy and full of product. I breathed in, nearly choking when his too-strong cologne hit the back of my throat. His eyes were hooded as he took me in, and I suddenly felt very exposed in the white dress Madam B made me wear this morning. Although it covered a lot of skin, it still clung tightly to my frame, leaving little to the imagination.
“That would be correct,” Madam B replied with a coy grin, lingering in the handshake a bit longer than I would have. “Are you interested in me preparing one of the rooms upstairs, or…”
“No. Although now that I've seen her, I might have to change my mind.” The guardsman looked me up and down, a hunger in his eyes that was equal parts cruel and lustful. I forced myself not to squirm, comforted by the fact that Huxley was only a few feet away, but I was also embarrassed. Although I’d learned a lot about self-defense while I lived in the deadlands, I still felt an uncontrollable fear where any of Cavil’s guards were concerned. It made me sick to my stomach when I thought of how much their orange and black uniforms affected me. Those colors brought me back to the night Josiah smashed Blan’s skull in. Blood. So much blood.
“Cavil wanted to see if your girls were available for a last minute function he’s having tonight. You have the best Companions in the Zone. I’ll admit, I'm not usually one to partake, but I haven’t seen this one before. Is she available?” He nodded at me.
I looked down at the floor, feigning submissiveness so I wouldn’t have to answer. “Shade is new. A recently acquired immune I got last night. I’ve been reaching out to my contacts across the empire to find immune Walkers needing work. I do what I can to please Emperor Cavil,” Madam B lied effortlessly.
“Well, I’d very much like Shade to join us then. We will send a transport to pick up your immune girls at 8. Please tell them to wear white. Cavil prefers it.”
Madam B nodded eagerly, leaning forward to open her front door and let him out. “In the future, Master, if you’d prefer to save yourself a trip to the Zone, I happily book appointments via tablet. Simply call, and we can work things out.”
The guardsman slowed then lingered in the doorway. “I was informed that a potential Resistance group might be meeting in the area. I wanted to scout the Zone for any suspicious activity.”
Madam B didn’t miss a beat. She clutched her chest like the skilled actress I'd learned
she was. “Resistance meetings?!” she gasped. “Well, if I see anything, I’ll be sure to send word. I can’t believe people would be stupid enough to challenge Cavil. It’s a shame there's no respect for the hierarchy of things anymore.”
The guardsman smiled at her, seemingly satisfied by her shock. “Thank you, Madam. Please let me know if you hear anything.”
Once the door was shut, we didn’t speak for a while, as if too scared that he would return and ask for more. I struggled to digest that I would be going to Cavil’s home for a party tonight.
It wasn’t until I felt a hand on my waist that I turned around and faced the terror of the situation. Huxley had bypassed all build up to his episodes and was already lost to his protective rage. His stormy green eyes were swimming with concern, determination, and anger. I gripped his hand tightly before looking over my shoulder at Madam B, who was pacing the floor and talking to herself.
Finally, she paused and stared at me. “We do what we must, right? Find Jules. She’ll get you ready.”
And with that, she was off, skittering around her home and mumbling to herself as I came to terms with the reality that, within a few hours, I’d be coming face to face with the man of my nightmares.
Chapter Thirteen
The guys hovered as I got ready, vetoing three of the outfits Jules picked out because they revealed too much skin. “I don’t like this at all,” Huxley barked. In the last three hours, he kept repeating the same three phrases:
“No.”
“She’s not wearing that.”
And my personal favorite, “I don’t like this.”
What if Maverick or Cyler weren’t there? What if Cavil recognized me? What if I had to…
“Here, keep this in your pocket,” Jules said while slapping a small blue pill in my palm.
“What is it?” I didn’t want to come across as ungrateful or melodramatic, but last time Jules gave me medicine, I died. I was a bit hesitant to accept anything from her now.
“Just one more way we’re going to insure that Cavil and his men don’t claim you for the night. If Maverick or Cyler can’t get you, take this pill.”
“What does it do?”
Jules laughed, a sadistic grin covering her face that made Huxley growl. Jacob had to take his mindspeak back out of his ear so that she couldn’t hear his insults.
“Let’s just say it’ll make you so sick that no one will find you appealing. They’ll practically beg you to leave,” she laughed. “You’ll throw up for the next 24 hours, but it’s a small price to pay, in my opinion.”
“Are you sure that’s safe? I think I need to come up with another backup plan,” Kemper said while scrolling through his tablet, looking at the blueprints for Cavil’s tower in Galla. “There aren’t many ways in and out. It’s like he’s built a fortress.”
Jules rolled her eyes and leaned over me, lining my lids with black makeup. “You think we haven’t already exhausted all of our options? The only way in and out is as a guard, Elite, Walker servant, or Companion. They saw her, they want her. The only way we aren’t going to raise any suspicions is if we continue as normal.”
“I don’t like it,” Huxley growled for the fourteenth time. Neither did I, but I didn’t say it. This was what I wanted, right? A chance to avenge Josiah, save Cyler and Maverick?
“You don’t really have a choice. If she decided not to go, they’d snoop around. Pretentious assholes,” Jules lined my lips with red, the bold shade complimenting my tan skin. Despite the destination, I smiled at my reflection. I didn’t feel like myself, but the effect of Jules’ skill almost convinced me that I could handle this. Maybe if I accepted my new persona, pretended to be this Shade person for a night, I could survive. She sprayed me with perfume, making me cough on the citrus scent.
“You look gorgeous,” Jacob’s mindspeak said from behind me. “I agree with Huxley. I don’t want her anywhere near those dicks, I want her home with us.”
Kemper continued to scroll through his tablet. I looked in the mirror, and in the reflection, my eyes connected with Patrick’s. Pale and jaw clenched, he looked wild with worry. I had to convince him that this was nothing more than an evening out. That I’d come home and slip into bed with him like I’ve done so many nights before. I spun around in my chair and stood. Patrick reached his hands out to me, and I nuzzled into him for a hug, burrowing my face against his chest and letting him steal some comfort from our hug.
“Maybe you should just plan on taking that pill the second you walk through the doors? I’ll nurse you back to health.”
I giggled against him. “Will you sing me more nursery rhymes and cradle me?” I asked. He began rocking me slowly as he hummed a quiet song meant just for us. The soothing dance warmed me from within, filling me with peace before the wave of reality crashed back along the shore.
“I’ll do whatever you want me to, Ash,” he murmured into my sleek, straight hair while cupping my neck. He began spinning me around the small bathroom, chuckling some when we bumped into Jacob who let out a curse and clutched his groin.
“Watch where you’re going, for fuck’s sake,” his mindspeak said as he growled through gritted teeth. That earned a laugh from Huxley, and soon we were all enjoying ourselves, even Jules.
Kemper tapped Patrick on the shoulder then held out a box to me. “It’s the fake fetter,” he said with a frown. I stared at the foreboding box, trying to think of another way around it, but ultimately opened the creaky wood and slipped on the brass fetter without a second glance. I wanted the chance to prove myself, I couldn’t back out now over a piece of fake jewelry. Kemper backed away, his hands wrapped around his middle, and Patrick resumed swaying with me.
“Am I terrible for saying I want to see Maverick and Cyler? I’m actually pretty excited about that,” I finally said.
I’d walk through hell to see my men. I’d kiss the devil for a lifetime with them. No cost was too great. Strength came in many forms. Love was messy. I’d once chosen myself. I’d learned how to prioritize self-love over something toxic, it’s what led me to Dormas in the first place. But now? Now, I had to learn how to navigate the all-consuming self-sacrificing kind of love. The love that forced you to step outside of your comfort zone. The love that made danger seem inconsequential compared to a life without them.
And that’s what I felt for all my men.
Huxley burst out in another series of laughter, startling us all. I slowly turned to face him, keeping Patrick close. Huxley was bent over, clutching his stomach as he shook. Was this it? Was this how Huxley finally lost his mind? We all stared worriedly as he stood to wipe his juniper eyes.
“Oh man,” he said as a couple more chuckles escaped. “I just realized you’re gonna see Cyler and Maverick. You know what they’re gonna do once they realize you willingly walked into Cavil’s home?”
Suddenly, Jacob’s mindspeak said “oh fuck” while Patrick cursed and Kemper frantically flipped through his tablet once more.
“Cyler’s into spanking, isn’t he?” Patrick asked while wrapping his arms tighter around me.
“I think so. You shouldn’t worry as much about Cavil, and worry more about what Maverick and Cyler are going to do once they see you,” Kemper said with a smirk.
I blushed, realizing they were right. Cyler and Maverick were going to be furious—and I couldn’t wait.
During the transport ride to Cavil’s tower the girls chatted amongst themselves, completely ignoring me. Blythe, at least, seemed less smug now that I was joining them. Her outfit was definitely more risque than before, too. It was practically lingerie with a sheer, white overlay. She was beautiful. Applying her lipstick, Jade smacked her lips at a compact mirror before looking at me, “You look good, Walker Queen.” I rolled my eyes at the sarcastic nickname. Ever since Madam B called me that at the meeting, all the Companions had taken up addressing me as such.
“Thanks,” I whispered.
I imagined what my reunion with Cyler and Maverick would be li
ke. Would they kiss me? Would they recognize me? With shaky fingers, I pulled out the compact mirror in my purse and frowned at the grey eyes and light hair. My plumped lips and harsh cheekbones looked foreign on my face.
Kaye looked with sad eyes out the window as Lowe, Jade, and Blythe chatted excitedly about a diamond necklace one of the men gifted earlier today. I leaned forward to whisper, “Got any advice?” to Kaye. She stiffened then turned her gaze towards me, a sadness penetrating my soul with such fierceness that I clutched my chest and had to catch my breath.
“Advice?” she asked. I watched as her hand with red-painted nails dug up the slit in her dress and pulled out a shiny flask. She took a small sip before continuing. “Do you have a survival instinct, little Walker Queen?” she asked. “Do you lean on your instinct?”
“I’m not sure what you’re asking,” I replied. The others had gone quiet and were leaning closer to hear what Kaye had to say. It was rare that she spoke, so they were just as intrigued as I was.
“Of course you don’t understand. My advice is to cling to that innate, primal part of you that screams for you to run when you find yourself in a dark place. Listen to that voice that warns you of danger. Take your adversity, take your differences, your resilience, and use it to your advantage.”
“Well damn, Kaye,” Lowe said with a laugh. “I think the girl just wanted to know what fork to use at the dinner table. We’re not going to war.”
“Every day is war,” Kaye replied in a curt tone before staring out the window once more.
The tower where Cavil lived was quite easily the tallest in Galla. As advertisements for fetters and videos of Cavil kissing babies scrolled along the exterior, I felt my stomach drop. Guards patrolled out front, and the transport didn’t stop outside, it traveled through a revolving garage door, stopping inside a brightly lit lobby.
Sanitizing steam filled the small space, cleaning the transport before the doors opened. I patted my pocket where a tiny compartment holding my puke-pill was. It was sewn into a seam, ready for if I was claimed for the night. I didn’t necessarily want to spend my evening puking the entire contents of my stomach, but it seemed preferable to a night in a stranger’s room.
