The Bear Shifter’s Desires

by Martha Woods

  Matt shuffled himself backwards slowly, crawling on his elbows until his back was against a tree and using the leverage to pull himself up onto his feet, hand cradled in the crook of his arm to prevent as much unnecessary movement as possible. The two cronies who had been prone in the snow had both woken up by now, reading the atmosphere and their own injuries and coming to the conclusion that things hadn’t ended in their favor, and the best thing to do right now was to pull back and discuss their options. Preferably over a drink.

  “This isn’t over,” Matt grunted, turning away after fixing Shane with a stare that would have chilled others, but only left him bored, “Just you wait, you’ll get what’s coming.”

  “If I finally get what’s coming to me you won’t be the one to give it, trust me on that.” Grabbing the handle of his ax with one hand and throwing the rest of his weight into it to dislodge it from the tree, Shane draped it over his shoulder and looked the three of them over as they all made their way back to the bucket, the picture of loss and failed hubris. Though with Todd hovering over his shoulder like a wounded bird, he couldn’t find as much enjoyment in seeing them leave as he would have liked. “Todd? You’re pretty close there.”

  “Do you know what you’ve done?” He asked, rubbing his palm across his head and groaning into his hand, “You said it yourself, he’s the big dog. And you thought it was a good idea to break his hand?”

  “He broke his hand, not me. I just threw my weight into it.”

  “That just makes it worse, he thinks that you were just trying to humiliate you so he’s going to come back at you ten times as hard, I told you this would happen.”

  “Well, when you’re right you’re right I guess,” Shane said, wiping at the side of his mouth and straightening himself up, “Hey how long do we have until the job’s done?”

  “About… an hour or two left, why’s that?”

  “I think I’m gonna head on home a little earlier than usual,” He replied, shrugging his shoulders, “Got some things to take care of, and I don’t really want to have to explain the bruise to anyone that we work with you know?”

  “Yeah… yeah , I get that,” Todd sighed, “Just be careful getting home alright? Just because you sent him packing today doesn’t mean that he’s going to stay away from you forever, they could just come back for you tonight, with interest.”

  “I thought you said he didn’t enjoy killing that guy?”

  “Maybe he didn’t enjoy it, but has that ever stopped a man with a temper before? Everyone in this town is packing, and the only thing stopping a shooting every five minutes is the fact that they’d get lit up by five different people at once for it. So all I’m saying is be careful out in that cabin of yours ok? I don’t want to have to clear this forest all by myself again.”

  “And miss out on all this conversation?” Shane laughed, “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. I owe you for this too.”

  “Yeah yeah, you can buy me a drink sometime in thanks,” Todd said, waving his hand in dismissal, “Go on, get out of here. I’ll handle it all with the bosses.”

  Shane turned back toward the exit of the site, seeing his car a mile away off in the distance and starting his way back. Though Todd hadn’t noticed, too busy and worried to be very observant at the moment, the bruise had already faded away from a shining mark to a dull spot, and in a few minutes it would be as though nothing had happened at all. Shane hadn’t exactly been in the mood to explain that particular aspect of himself just yet.

  So instead he marched back to his car, eagerly awaiting a date with his bed and a drink to calm his nerves, and after that it would be back to business. Whatever that business turned out to be.

  Chapter 5

  The moon was out in force, shining brightly down on the snow and making the forest glow an eerie white, shadows draping across the ground and arcing through the trees like black ink on paper, surrounding the lonely cottage in its inky prison. Shane had been laying on his back for the last few hours, staring up at the ceiling and counting the notches in the wood, just waiting for a plan to come to mind.

  Hours of thinking, and nothing had come just yet, instead he was left with a mind as blank as the snow outside, and it was starting to get on his nerves.

  “What am I going to do?” He said to himself, tapping his fingers along the bed to an invisible rhythm, “Do I really stay here and wait? Or do I go and help my family, on opposite sides of the country in states I haven’t been to in years?”

  It was a question that had been on his mind since the call with Helga, and he was still in search of an answer, wishing that he could just reach out and grab onto something tangible without having to think too hard about it. Instead he was stuck between the desire to protect and the need for self-preservation, an instinct that had grown in his time in the war, and only been nurtured further by the selfish world of the outside. He’d seen good people, many good people in his time travelling, but he’d seen just as many charlatans who were only out to hurt other people, and he knew for a fact that you couldn’t just let your guard down whenever you wanted. Somewhere out there, there was always going to be someone who would want to take what was yours, and what Shane had that everyone wanted unfortunately seemed to be his life.

  And he was absolutely no good to anyone, least of all himself, without the ability to draw breath.

  “Just because I didn’t see any signs that they were coming for me doesn’t mean they aren’t,” He said, “They might know that I would be looking, so they could have put their most experienced on the job.”

  Everyone from his old unit had died young, and died poorly, so he didn’t have to worry about a potential old friend to come and collect on the bounty, though he was still nervous about who exactly he was going to meet face to face when the moment came. Friend or not, he still knew just about everyone who had been a part of the clan, they weren’t strangers, they were nearly family.

  He was about to go back to counting the wood when he heard a snap from off in the distance, a dry twig somewhere out in the trees that had clearly been trampled by something, though by what he had no idea. It could have easily been a deer, or perhaps a bear, but the feeling in his gut was enough to convince him that it was nothing of the sort. His senses were going haywire to try and pick up any hint of scent to determine who the intruder was, but much to his concern he couldn’t pick up a single thing.

  “So not wildlife,” He whispered, “Definitely one of ours.”

  Padding lightly across the room, he kept his fists clenched and his senses alert, ready for whatever could possibly jump out from the shadows at him. A quick glance out the window showed him nothing really worthwhile, only a field of undisturbed snow, the faint indentations of what could have been footprints already covered up by a fresh dusting from the snow blowing outside.

  Turning away from the window, he was about ready to retreat back into the room and settle down to wait it out when the door echoed with a knock, two heavy thumps echoing off the walls like gunshots. There were many ways that he had thought he could be attacked, and none of them were prefaced with a knock on the door.

  “Shane?” Asked a gruff voice through the wood, “I know that this isn’t what you wanted, but could you please open the door? It’s cold out here.”

  He recognized that voice, though he couldn’t quite place it from sound alone, which was all the confirmation that he needed to be certain that it was someone from his own clan. So they had been looking for him, and if they’d managed to get here without him so much as hearing a breath from them then they’d definitely pulled out all the stops to catch him. He’d be flattered if he wasn’t focused on finding a way out of the situation.

  “Give me a minute!” He called back, aware that he had no other plays right now except to open the door, it would save them from breaking it down at least, “What are you here for?”

  “I’d prefer to discuss that face to face,” The voice called back, “Just open the door please.”

  Re
sting his hand over the handle, he sighed to himself and readied himself to defend as he swung it open, narrowing his eyes at the bundled-up figure in front of him as they walked in and let the door fall shut behind them.

  “Ah, thank you!” They said, pulling their scarf down and revealing a neatly trimmed beard sitting just below a simple set of eyeglasses, frosted over from the snow outside to the point where they were almost white. “I’m not used to a climate this cold, it’s a little surprising that you decided to make this your home for now.”

  “I… don’t mind the cold too much,” He said, taking his guest’s coat and hanging it up next to the door, “You didn’t have to make the journey all the way out here to find me, I’m not sure you’ll be satisfied with what you find.”

  “Are any of us?” He asked, gesturing to a nearby chair and seating himself when he got a nod of permission, “I’m not sure you remember me, but we fought together a few years ago, back before everything ended and you decided to leave. Good days, mostly bad if I’m being honest, but the experiences with our people were… not so bad.”

  “Fought together…” Shane said to himself, “Not many of those left anymore, so that puts you on a very small list. Paul?”

  “Oh you do remember me!” Paul said, grinning widely and slapping his hands against his knees, “I was worried that I might be acting too familiar, but it’s… flattering that you actually know who I am. I’m just sorry that this meeting can’t be under more pleasant circumstances.”

  “You’re still here though, you can’t be that sorry about it.” Shane pulled back the blinds again, staring out into the darkness on the search for any silhouettes in the trees. “Anyone else with you tonight?”

  “No, just me. I promise.” Paul smiled. “I insisted on it, I figured that I owed you a proposal first.”

  “I’m not exactly dating right now,” He replied, finally satisfied that the two of them were alone out here, “You don’t seem to be in the explaining mood for why you’re here.”

  “Your family’s always been… dramatic, but you’ve also been intensely loyal to each other, we figured that Orson would get in contact with all of you to tell you what he did, and what we’re planning to do. Even with everything that happened between you, I don’t think he’d just leave you out to dry without a warning, that’s just not the kind of man he is.”

  Paul was right, but Shane wasn’t going to nod and agree with it, there was still enough resentment leftover to make him not comfortable with admitting that Orson cared enough about him to matter. Instead he responded by pulling his own chair open and taking a seat in front of Paul, crossing his arms and gesturing for him to continue. “What’s your proposal? I’m guessing that it doesn’t involved letting me go.”

  “Orson destroyed us, and something like that… there’s no hope for him, he’s going to be killed on sight at this rate. But you don’t have to as well, you weren’t involved in what he did, you couldn’t have possibly seen it coming. That’s why I insisted that you get a chance to represent yourself, to make your case known before they decide what to do with you.”

  “Represent myself? Like in a court?” Shane laughed, “You really think they’d give me a fair trial? I’m sure half of them just want to see my head on a stake, no matter how involved I am.”

  “You still have friends back in the clan Shane, not all of us are so gungho about wanting to hunt you down, do you understand? I promise, you come with me calmly and I’ll do everything that I can to make sure that you’re treated fairly.”

  “How long did you have to argue to not have me killed right away?” Shane asked, leaning back in his seat and watching for each emotion and flinch on Paul’s face, “You’re acting like it’s such a huge favor that you’re doing me, which means that it must’ve been a lot of effort to go through. And that means that you probably didn’t extend the offer to my brother and sister, did you?” Paul didn’t answer, which was answer enough for him, though Shane couldn’t help the flash of hot anger at knowing that what he suspected was now confirmed. “Have they been hurt?”

  Paul shook his head, looking into Shane’s eyes and saying, “They haven’t been hurt, and hopefully they won’t have to be. Orson is the only one who doesn’t get a choice in how this ends, the rest of you could be caught dead or alive.”

  “Dead or alive? More like dead or to be killed later, I know how pissed off all of you must be over getting outwitted by Orson so easily, you’ve probably got a real bone to pick with him and we’re the perfect bone to strip clean, aren’t we?” Shane shook his head, bracing his foot against the floor in case he needed to move fast. “I was told not to kill any of you if I could help it, but if I find out that any of my family have been hurt, even just a tiny little drop of blood, I’ll march right back to the clan myself and burn the rest of it to the ground, do you understand?”

  “Then you know how important this deal could be,” Paul said, leaning forward and almost pleading, “Making yourselves known, showing us the kinds of people, you’ve matured into over the years, that’s the thing that will keep you alive. Not this… pointless machismo.”

  “It’s only pointless if I’m not prepared to follow through on it,” Shane said, “It was a bad idea coming out here all alone, what if I decided to just lean over there and snap your neck like a twig? You fought with me, you know what I can do with these hands.”

  “I know,” He replied, gulping as Shane flexed his fingers, “But I know that you’re also a good man, not a psycho killer. You wouldn’t kill me without a reason, and I don’t see much point in giving you one just yet.”

  “You could be wrong, it’s been a long time since you knew me,” Shane said, letting the moment linger. He wasn’t going to kill him, he was right about that, but he had no problems with roughing him up if he determined that it could be necessary. He could know what’s happening with the others, maybe even have the ability to call them back and give his family just a little more time to get away from this whole mess of a situation, he would just have to wait and see how this conversation transformed.

  Shane sighed, “I’m not going to take your deal, so you marched out here for no reason at all it turns out. I’ll take the same chances that the rest of my family is being forced to take, so you can take your misplaced altruism and try to turn it into something useful.”

  “Shane, please,” Paul said, leaning forward and actually daring to place his hand on Shane’s arm, “I don’t think you realize what you’re up against, it’s not just us looking for you, they sent out the wolves as well, and you know just as well as I do the kind of things that they’re capable of. This isn’t a fight that you can win, and you know it.”

  “Then I’ll die, and you’ll know that it’s your fault, just like you should.” Shane stood up, gesturing to the door and speaking with a certain finality in his tone, “You’ve outworn your welcome in my house, I’d like you to leave now. I suggest that you don’t come back here ever again unless you’re prepared for violence.”

  Paul opened his mouth, ready to protest before he thought better of it, letting his head fall forward with a sigh as he picked himself up from the chair and walked towards the door, pausing to shrug on his coat before turning around and addressing him one last time. “I’m still grateful for everything that you did for me back in the war, I don’t think I’ll ever stop being grateful for it, but I’m not going to hold back just because we served together. One way or another you’re going to end up standing in front of our clan, and when that happens I want you to remember that I tried to offer you a way out of this.”

  “I’ll remember, and you remember that I gave you a warning to stop this before it goes any further. You talk to your people about my family, and you tell them to stop when what they’re doing before they do something they regret.” Shane held the door open, scowling for the first time as Paul walked past him and stopped in the threshold. “That’s your cue to leave, I don’t care whatever we went through together back in the war, th
ose days are long gone and so is any thought that we’ll cooperate ever again.”

  “Then just… let me give you this one last warning, as a favor to an old friend will you?” Paul looked around the tree line, as though he was confirming that they were in fact alone, before he turned back and said, “The team that’s looking for all of you, it’s made up of us, you know that, bears that are sore over our home being taken from us, but there’s more that you might not have considered. The wolves that are with us… some of them are fantastic trackers, you wouldn’t believe the things that they can do, I guess I just want you to know that you’re back in the fight against the wolves again after all these years, so you can actually prepare yourself properly.”

  “I’m fighting against the wolves again, after all the years that I already lost to that fight. And you’re the one working with them, some comrade you turned out to be huh?” He started closing the door, looking at the disappointed face of Paul one last time before he uttered one final, “Don’t come around again,” and shut the door.

  He set himself by the door for the next few hours, making sure that he was truly alone out in his little isolated retreat, only relaxing when the sun rose in the sky and white light was blooming through the windows, some of the local wildlife coming to life along with the day and chirping in the trees. The news that there were really wolves working side by side with the people looking for him was… deeply concerning, especially knowing what he did about how much of those older bears despised the wolf clan for their actions during the war. He had to admit that he still had some problems, though he’d tried to dismiss any lingering hate that he had in his mind by reminding himself that his side, and he himself, had done some truly reprehensible things during those years of strife, it wasn’t fair to lay it at the feet of a single group of people.

  But now he guessed that he and his family had been shifted into the single group to blame, an opportunity for their two clans to heal and cooperate by bringing them to some perverted idea of ‘Justice’. How flattering, to be the instrument of healing.