by Nancy Gideon
“So what keeps you going? No good retirement plan?”
He chuckled but wouldn’t be baited into revealing more than a vague sketch of his life. “Unfinished business.”
“Personal or professional?”
“You certainly ask a lot of questions.” A touchy subject. She could read his reluctance and discomfort in the sudden tightening of his jawline.
“I like a good mystery and you, like it or not, are one big question mark.”
“I’m really a very simple fellow.”
Now she laughed. “Right. I’m sure it says that on your four-volume passport right under your license to kill.”
“Let’s start back.”
What she really wanted to do was continue going forward. She knew nothing about Zach Russell and he didn’t seem inclined to give her any additional insight. She was sure he had a dossier on her that gave away every secret from her grade school transcripts to the locations of her moles and scars. And he knew things not contained in any file. It wasn’t fair that he should be a blank page. It made him all the more transient as he passed through her life again.
“So what will you do when you hang up your gun?”
“Like one of your American gunfighters?”
“Something like that.”
“I hadn’t given it much thought.”
She snorted. “You give everything way too much thought. I can’t believe something as unavoidable as your future wouldn’t warrant some consideration.”
“Not everyone in my profession has the luxury of a future.”
She hadn’t thought of that, of the daily danger of what he did. She was sure there was some percentage in a chart somewhere telling what his chances were of actually making it to the Golden Years. But she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear it. She fell silent, her mood sinking into somber realms.
“A restaurant.”
His sudden claim startled her from the morose turn of her thoughts. “What?”
“My retirement plan. I’d like to open a place of my own, nothing fancy or extravagant but with a regular clientele you could join for a glass of wine at the end of the day. Some place along the Mediterranean maybe, where life moves a little slower and the finer things are appreciated.”
“Haven’t given it much thought, eh?”
Funny thing was, she could picture him there, surrounded by the pleasing scents of olive oil and simmering sauces and an enviable wine cellar. He’d spend his mornings inventorying ingredients for the evening’s specials. Instead of poring over intelligence files, he’d be researching old family recipes. He’d trade hunkering down in the shadows of some covert foreign conflict for swapping stories about past adventures over a checkered tablecloth and crusty bread. His future dream would also feature family of his own, children underfoot and an indulgent wife keeping the home fires simmering in the background. It was a nice picture, a pretty postcard existence a world away from her own.
What would her own future hold? A boardroom. An office in a lakefront skyrise. Work that consumed her days then went home with her every night, becoming her constant companion in lieu of a significant other. A life like the one her father led all alone at the top of his empire. With no one to share the successes, big or small.
A bleak forecast.
They left the water’s edge to cross the sandy beach. Music was playing from somewhere in a soft accompaniment to the continual rumble of the waves. Zach had already returned to ready mode, his gaze scanning for potential problems. Toni could have told him the greatest threat to her wasn’t in the bushes. It was insidiously stalking inside her. The fear, the isolation, the insecurity. Those were the things endangering her future, distracting her from what needed to be done, from what should have been seen. She needed to clear her mind of those old cobwebs from the past so she could turn with sharpened attention to who was trying to destroy her. She needed to get focused, to be stronger, taking control of the destiny someone wanted to deny her. So far they’d used weapons that attacked her weaknesses to tear down her confidence and make her doubt her own decisions. But in doing so, they’d unintentionally brought to her the only means of defeating their scheme. Only one source could fortify her sense of self and drive away the loneliness that was her greatest enemy. And he was here beside her. Zach Russell was the cure for all that moved against her, for all who thought to turn her frailties into weapons to fatally wound her.
Now, if she could only find the courage to take the cure.
He tucked her hand into the sheltering bend of his arm. As they stepped into the glass elevator, her touch ceased being passive. At the slow stroke of her fingertips down his inner arm, Zach’s attention jerked from surveillance to an alarmed inquiry as the doors slid shut behind them. As the elevator rose, Toni decided it was time to raise the stakes.
“You asked me what I’d do if we were different than who we are, but you never told me how you’d like this evening to end if we were a normal couple finishing up a romantic walk in the sunset.”
“No, I didn’t.”
My, but he was cautious, unwilling to give anything away. She held the back of his hand in her palm while her fingertips traced inviting swirls up to the line of the brief bandaging he still wore. His gaze may have been guarded, his expression distant, but he made no attempt to pull his hand away. He could have stopped her with that simple gesture of objection, but he didn’t.
“I told you that I’d be thinking of ways to get you out of your pants and into mine.” She leaned closer, letting her body sway seductively until they were nearly touching. He’d gone totally still, yet she could imagine the frantic turnings in his mind. “Can you honestly tell me you haven’t been wondering the same thing?”
“I’ve been busy thinking of ways to keep you safe.”
She smiled at his stiff reply. “But I am safe. I’ve never felt more secure than when we were together last night.”
A flicker of panic skirted his gaze. “That may have been a mistake.”
“It didn’t feel like a mistake. Are you telling me that you regret it happened?” She pressed into him, layering herself upon his body like a soft fitted sheet. He didn’t answer her in words. His physical response spoke clearly enough. She reached down with her free hand to outline that impressive reply.
“Toni, don’t complicate things,” he warned quietly. Still, he hadn’t moved or resisted her increasingly attentive touch.
“You like things simple and direct. Let me be direct. Tomorrow, it’s back to business for both of us but tonight I want that fairy-tale ending that comes after two normal people share dinner together and a walk on the beach in paradise. If that’s not what you want, too, just say so.”
His answer was to step back abruptly, severing the connection between them both physically and emotionally. He stared at the floor numbers lighting above the door, his concentration fierce, his jaw a block of stone.
Pride wouldn’t let her pursue the matter further. She’d asked and he’d answered with a brutal clarity. She’d pretend it hadn’t torn her heart in two.
When the doors parted, she started forward. Zach caught her arm, delaying her exit, she thought for security’s sake. He pulled her back against him while the doors closed.
“That was our floor,” she protested faintly, refusing to look around so he could see the anguish sparkling in her eyes.
“I wasn’t ready to get off,” was his soft reply.
She tried to turn then but his arms curved about her middle, binding her to him, holding her close but not tight. His mouth sketched a warm line from her temple to her left ear, exciting a hard shudder from her as his tongue traced along that delicate whorl. He continued down to suck suggestively at the side of her neck and nibble the sensitive curve to her shoulder as the elevator rose to the top and started down again.
“Push for our floor, love.” His words whispered moist and hot against her skin. He was definitely pushing her buttons as he pressed the hard length of him against the groove of her bu
ttocks. One of his hands slid low, cupping her firmly. She lit like a blow torch.
The distance from the elevator to the door of their room was like a marathon. By the time he fitted the key, she was gasping for breath and fighting against the weakness trembling through her limbs. She collapsed against the inside of the door while he turned on a few strategic lights and did a quick yet thorough search of the premises. Then he came back to her, flattening her to the door panel with the full press of his body. Their mouths came together, all heat seeking hunger as impatient hands quickly rid one another of the barrier of clothing.
He lifted her, naked, from the pooling of her garments. He carried her to the bed then followed her down to the spread, covering her with his hard contours. And when she felt just the tiniest start of alarm, he quieted her panic and quashed her dark memories beneath an unhurried kiss.
And he made love to her, lavishing her with a healing touch, soothing raw remembrances with the slow stroke of his tongue, building strong new emotions that could conquer the first signs of panic with an anticipation of pleasures to come. He taught her the power of her own body’s responses, how to ride the urgent crests of sensation and drift in languorous fulfillment on the tide of lingering contentment. And he made her feel secure enough to speak of the past that haunted her.
“He was so angry.”
“Who was, love?”
“Steve Jenson. That was his name. Funny, I never think of him by name, only by what he did.”
Zach came up on his elbow to regard her with a tender intensity. “Because the ransom wasn’t paid?”
Toni stared straight up at the ceiling, her expression closed and inaccessible. “The entire time I was in that cold, nasty place, the only thing that kept me hanging on was the certainty that my father would rescue me and punish those responsible. I was sure of it. It was inconceivable that he wouldn’t, that he would choose his money over my safety. Inconceivable.” She fell quiet for a moment, reliving that sense of stunned surprise and ultimately, betrayal, even now. “I was so angry I wasn’t even afraid at first. Not at first.”
Can you believe he wouldn’t pay a penny to save his own kid?
No, she couldn’t. The shock of it had settled in so deep and so harsh that her captor’s next fierce sentiment almost went unheard.
I guess I’m going to have to find another way to get paid.
Toni’s eyes squeezed shut. His voice echoed in her memory, so fierce and furious, so ugly with the need to inflict pain. She began to tremble, as she’d trembled then, in fear, in anguish. Because rescue wasn’t coming. Because hope was gone.
“He can’t hurt you now.”
Zach’s firm summation wedged between the horror of those bleak, desperate days and the reality that she’d survived them. She’d survived them long enough for Zach Russell to find her. Long enough for Veta to put together the pieces linking the potting soil found in Toni’s dank prison to the delivery driver from the plant nursery and to put an end to her attacker’s life with a bullet to the head. But those two events never closed the circle of fear. Because the rest of the truth died with Steven Jenson.
Where’s the money?
“They never found his accomplices.” Toni spoke from out of the depths of her pain and panic, bringing to the forefront the anxiety that continued to stalk her peace of mind. “After we returned home, the case grew cold and was closed.”
“And you kept all your secrets closed up inside you.”
She glanced at him, her eyes shiny, reflecting the bleakness of her soul. “What choice did I have? I wanted it to be over. I couldn’t go through it again. I couldn’t drag my family name through it. The scandal would have followed me. I never would have been able to escape it.”
“Have you? Escaped it? What good has carrying all that shame and fear for all these years all alone done?”
Her lips pinched together but she had no answer to seal inside. No reason that was good enough, except one. Zach could see it etched in the torment twisting her expression.
“He wouldn’t pay for your release and you’ve been paying that price over and over ever since. It’s not your debt, Toni. You did nothing wrong. Stop paying for it.”
“But it is. It wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t broken the rules. Your rules, Zach. I gave them the opportunity. I made it possible.”
His reply was low and forceful. “It would have happened anyway. If not then, then another time. You think this whole thing just popped into Steve Jenson’s head when he saw you unescorted outside that club? It had been planned, Toni. Everything was arranged except when.”
“And I walked right into it.”
“You were an eighteen-year-old girl. It wasn’t your job to protect yourself. That was my job. And I failed you.”
He failed her because it had been easier to break a young girl’s heart than one of his precious rules. And he’d been paying the price for that ever since.
It was Toni who made the decision for both of them. “We’ve paid enough, me for my pride, you for doing your duty. Maybe it’s time we both let our secrets go. What do you think, Russell? Think we can move on without the weight of all that guilt?”
“I think it’s worth a try. Let’s move on, shall we?” He bent to kiss her.
Her answer sounded suspiciously like a sigh.
They both slept deep and dreamless in a tangle of one another’s embrace. Daylight flooded the room when a single click woke Zach to a duty he’d almost forgotten.
Chapter 13
The sight of a naked Zach Russell throwing himself across Toni with gun in hand stopped Veta and Mateo Chavez in the doorway. Toni grabbed for concealing covers. A stunned silence fell over the four of them that was finally broken by Veta’s stilted explanation.
“I knocked earlier when you didn’t show up for this morning’s meeting. When no one answered, I went to Mateo for a key. I thought something was wrong.”
“As you can see, sis,” Mateo concluded as shock gave way to an awful stiffness, “we are intruders, not rescuers. Forgive us.”
He gripped his sister’s arm and hauled her from the room. The sound of the door slamming sent home the enormity of what had just happened. She’d missed a meeting. She’d been discovered in bed with her bodyguard. And seeing him braced in front of her, gloriously unclad, she had no desire to leave the tangle of covers.
But Zach had other ideas. He’d already shifted into professional mode, albeit a rather-tarnished-by-embarrassment professionalism. He was snatching up his clothes before Toni could make any other suggestion as to how to spend the morning. He didn’t apologize. She didn’t think she could have stood that. But his rigid lack of communication was almost worse. And in her uncertainty, all Toni’s insecurities resurfaced behind a protective shield.
“Get showered,” Zach ordered tersely. “You’re not that late. Perhaps you haven’t been missed.”
What was missing was a little tender emotion from the man who had rocked her sensual world all night long.
“Are you afraid this lapse of judgment will cost you your job? That Veta’s calling my father and you won’t get paid?”
And in that moment, Toni realized that that’s what she was afraid of, that her father would be called. That he would view her behavior as a sign she was incapable of taking over her mother’s business.
But Russell was not now and had never been intimidated by Victor Castillo.
“I’m afraid our lapse of judgment will compromise my effectiveness in keeping you safe,” was his curt reply. “Get dressed.”
“We can’t keep the world waiting, can we?”
She flung back the sheet and strode fiercely to the bathroom. As she stalked past him, Zach was tempted to reach out, to seize her in his arms, to pull her up against him and kiss the haughtiness from her expression because he could see the wounded vulnerability he caused huddling behind it.
But he let her walk by. He forfeited the moment that would have healed the awkwardness between them to
preserve a sense of less complicated distance.
Because there was nothing simple about his response to the sight of her all sleek, sleep tousled and in the buff, as she closed the door on him.
Her staff was on their third cup of coffee and fighting over the remaining pastries by the time Toni strode in clad in an severe business suit and an equally aggressive mood. As Zach took his inconspicuous place at the door, she accepted coffee and plunged into the meeting without apology. No one would guess how shaky that outer sheen of confidence was.
She briefed those closest to her on the merger between her family and Angel Premiero, laying out the anticipated transfer of the company base to Mexico and a prospective shift in job titles and obligations. The mood was somber and the lack of optimism worried Toni as much as the speculative glances going between her and the silent sentinel at the door. How many rumors had they heard concerning Premiero? About her reason for being late to the meeting? She couldn’t afford to let their opinions matter. This was the day she left the right to a personal life behind, the day she became wedded to her mother’s dream.
It wasn’t as though she’d had any better offers.
They would celebrate the union of Aletta’s international allure and Premiero’s money at the Royale’s highly publicized hotel conference. Premiero had been sinking funds into that arena as well, buying up foundering properties and transfusing them with the necessary capital to update and compete. Toni would accompany him as his guest to the formal event.
Premiero’s yacht would moor at the marina in the early evening, allowing them time to exchange pleasantries and change into formal wear. Their meeting the next morning would be all business. She had all the figures, all the paperwork, all her father’s instructions. What she didn’t have was a good feeling about the whole venture. She’d studied the books. Despite her father’s dire prophesies, she didn’t see the same downward spiral in profits that precipitated the move and the new partner. Perhaps it was her inexperience, or maybe her reluctance to go cross grain of her mother’s wishes. The merger sat uneasy, like a heavy meal, only this discomfort wasn’t going away.
