I stood up, scanning the floor for my jeans and wrestling them on with one hand. “Okay,” I mumbled into the phone. “When are you guys leaving?”
“The nurse is getting her discharge instructions, so we’ll probably be out of here in about an hour, I’m guessing? Andi, you don’t have to come. I just wanted to let you know.”
“Of course I have to come,” I scoffed.
Mike sighed. “Okay. We’ll see you in a bit then.”
“As soon as I can get over there. Yep. Half an hour.”
“What’s up?” Bryan asked. I turned around to see him stepping into his own jeans. Damn shame. Holy shit. Was there ever a time when I would look at him and not turn into a sex-crazed teenager?
I tugged my hair back into a ponytail, not really caring about the bumps and flyaways I knew had to be there. “My mom. They’re moving her back home, and I want to be there.”
“Oh, that’s great news!”
“Well, no. I don’t know. She still isn’t really comfortable around Mike. I mean, I’m still the only one she really knows.”
Bryan nodded. “Ah, got it.” Then his eyes lit up. “Hey, I could come with you.”
Thinking about my quasi-boyfriend and my stepdad and my traumatized mom all in the same room together trying to figure each other out made my head hurt. “Thanks, but maybe it’s not the best day?”
“No problem. Want me to tell Gladys when you can come in?”
I smiled. “That would be amazing, actually. If she needs me, the two o’clock shift, maybe? I don’t think I could make it before then, and I don’t want to piss her off.”
“No,” he laughed. “You do not want to piss Gladys off.”
I stood on tiptoes and pressed one more kiss to his lips. Soft and promising. Then I turned to leave. I was almost to the door when I remembered, and tears sprang to my eyes. I hadn’t done laundry in a week, and both my cocktail waitress uniforms—I’d paid Gladys to make me an extra—were unwashed and stinky.
“What?” Bryan asked.
“Just…laundry. I have to do laundry. I’m out of clothes and out of quarters for the machines.” I let out a cross between a frustrated laugh and a sob.
“No problem. I’m doing mine today. I’ll take care of it. Give me your key.”
“You can’t be serious,” I said. We’d been together, but I didn’t think we were together. Certainly not enough for him to do my laundry.
“I am completely serious. Please, Andi. I found you a job and an apartment. I can do a load of laundry.”
“Seriously?”
He nodded, pulling me to him and gently holding me for one, two, three calming breaths. Then he murmured, “I’ve taken care of you this much. Let me take care of you a little more.”
At that moment, it hit me like a ton of bricks—how very much I needed that. And that just made me want to cry even more. I stood on tiptoes, smacked a kiss on his mouth, backed up with a lip-biting smile, pried my key off the ring, and ducked next door to call a taxi and clean up for a few minutes.
Chapter 17
Half an hour later, I stood over Mom’s hospital bed, exchanging glances with Carol. I’d known her long enough to translate the “stop freaking out, this’ll be fine” looks, but I couldn’t help it. This was my mom, and she had just recovered from major surgery and brain trauma less than four weeks ago. And yes, I did think it was a little insane for her to be moving back into a house she didn’t remember with a man who was, for all intents and purposes, a complete stranger.
Mom winced as she stepped out of bed and into her wheelchair. She was still shaky and sore, and another twinge of worry tightened my stomach.
“We’re all ready for you to come stay at the house,” Mike said to Mom, looking so tall and confident now that he had a walking cast on his leg. “My buddies put a ramp up to the front door, so we can get in and out without trouble. We can walk down this one path you used to like.”
Mom gave him that smile that I knew meant she was humoring him.
“Carol helped us get set up so you can use the bathroom without trouble, and her sister’s cleaning business came by to tidy up before she moves back in.” He was looking at Mom, but I knew he was talking to me.
“Okay,” I said, blowing out a breath. “Mamá, are you sure you’re okay?” I glanced over to all her stuff waiting on a cart to be taken out to the car.
She reached out for my hand. “Mike has been so good to me. And he’s got a room all ready—”
“I’m going to sleep on the couch,” he said. “TV’s out there anyway.” He smiled, and Carol laughed. It was so obviously forced.
“Okay. I’m going to come by with some groceries.” I did a mental tally of how much tip money I’d made and how much I could afford to drop at the grocery store to fill both of our kitchens. I usually mooched off the Starr’s chefs, but I still ate cereal and pasta at my place once in a while. “Are the nurses coming by? Home health people?”
“Every few days, they’ll be over to check her dressings and report back to her doctors. Bring her prescriptions that need to be refilled,” Carol explained. “The home health aides will be by every day to monitor her vitals and check in.” She rolled Mom up to me, and I crouched down to hug her.
Mom pressed a kiss to my cheek and whispered in my ear. “I’m going to be okay. Sometimes it feels like you’re freefalling. It’s part of life.”
I sighed. I knew she was right, and I was cool with freefalling—as long as I knew I had a parachute. I kissed her back and whispered, “I’ll see you in a couple hours, okay?”
As she left, tears welled up in my eyes. With Mom not even able to take care of herself (let alone me), classes spiraling out of control back home, and trying to make enough to cover two rents and two lives, I wasn’t just freefalling without a parachute. I was jumping into a field of barbed wire.
“Andi,” Mike said, resting his hand on my shoulder as we waited for the elevator. “I’m going to take care of her, just like I always have. I’ll do whatever she needs.” The love that shone in his eyes warmed my heart, even though I knew it wasn’t something he could possibly do. Mom didn’t even know him. She needed the one person in her life she recognized, the person she knew for sure loved her.
“I know you will, Mike.”
“What I’m saying is, you can go back to Philly. Check in over the phone. She hasn’t freaked out in days, and she has Carol, who she’s getting really comfortable with. She’s gonna be okay.”
“I know you think that, and I appreciate it. But I think she still needs me.”
His hand gripped my shoulder hard. “We’ll see you in a bit then.”
I got a taxi to take me to the nearest grocery store and loaded up with easy meals Mom and Mike could heat up in the microwave. I promised myself that later in the week, when I got a free minute, I’d go back for some fresher stuff and do some home cooking for them—at least some taco meat, enchiladas, and spaghetti sauce, things I could stuff in their freezer that wouldn’t have all the gross preservatives of frozen and canned. This would have to do for now.
Mom and Mike’s place was a white townhouse complex with metal-railed stairs, just like half the other places to live on the outskirts of Vegas, but they’d been so excited when they got it. Actually, Mike had proposed to her not with a ring, but with a key to a new place. Even I’d had to admit to myself that it was pretty adorable. She’d told me every detail of her plans for decorating it so clearly that the first time I’d visited home for Christmas two years ago, I felt like I’d already been there before.
“It’s tiny,” Mom had said. “Just one bedroom. But it’s all ours. I’ve never owned a house before.” She had been over the moon, so I hadn’t even bothered to point out how it was so small I could barely stand to sleep on the couch for the four days I’d been there.
Just like always, I hadn’t
wanted to make any waves.
I shouldered the two bags of groceries, letting the plastic ones dangle from my fingers, and made my way into the front door.
The brand-new wood on the ramp Mike’s friends had made creaked and sighed as it adjusted to my footsteps. It was really solidly built from what I could tell. One more piece of Mom’s hopefully temporary life being made a little easier filled me with relief.
“Hi, guys!” I called when I got inside.
“Hey, Andi!” Mike called from the back. “Your mom’s checking out her digs.” I heard the edge of fear under the cheerfulness in his voice. He wanted everything to be okay for her. He sounded just like he did the day he’d proposed to her with the key, hoping she’d like everything about the place he wanted them to call home. This was probably a million times scarier.
I tugged and pushed and rearranged things in the freezer to make room for the meals I’d brought. It looked like Mike had stocked up, too. The bread, milk, and cream cheese went in the fridge, and the bananas went on the hook in the kitchen. The sink and counters were spotless; the fridge even looked like it had been cleaned. I glanced at my phone. I’d missed a text message from Bryan.
Got you the 2:00. Uniform in your locker. See you soon. xx
My eyebrows went up at the “xx,” and I felt a goofy grin taking over my face. I cleared my throat and walked the six long steps to Mom’s room. Carol stood there with her, helping her get in bed, while Mike showed her how he’d set the TV up and the easiest way for her to get in and out of the bathroom. I threw a glance over my shoulder at the living room and, sure enough, there was a stack of pillows and blankets waiting on the couch for Mike. I stepped back into her room. After everything Mike showed Mom, she smiled and politely thanked him. When he brought out the case with all her DVDs, explaining that lately she’d really gotten into the latest crime-thriller show, she threw back her head and laughed. “Really? Me?”
Something sparkled in Mike’s eyes. “Yes, we started watching it together because I suggested it. You ended up loving it more than I did.”
“I don’t believe it,” she said, like she wanted him to think she was joking but was actually dead-serious.
“It’s true,” I said, approaching her bed, “and I know why. Show her the DVD, Mike.” He did, holding it out so she could see the face of the actor printed on the disc. “What do you think of him, Mom?”
A wicked smile pulled up the corners of her mouth. “Yes, I see. I already like it.”
“She has a crush on Everly House,” Carol hooted, clapping her hands together. “How could I forget that?”
We all laughed at that—Mike somewhat uncomfortably—but after that, the tension in the room was considerably lighter. It was only then I realized that the clock by Mom’s bedside read 1:15. If I was going to make it to the Shooting Starr in time to change and get on the floor, I’d have to move.
I texted the cab company for a ride, then slapped together a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for myself before saying my goodbyes.
The whole ride to work, all I could think about was how much lighter it had felt at Mom’s place. With all the stress about my classes, maybe my Philly life really did need me more than my Vegas life. But, then again, Mom still didn’t remember anything. There was no way she was in a state for me to ditch her. Who knew? In one or two weeks, she’d probably be doing so much better that I could leave for Philly without flinching. If I left one week from now, I could get back and graduate by the skin of my teeth, which was all I really needed to do.
For now, Mom still needed me here, still deserved a familiar face. In that sense, at least, I was the only one who could take care of her. And, as I smiled at the thought of Bryan handling my laundry, I didn’t mind being taken care of either. In fact, it was really, really nice.
I reported back to the Starr and high-tailed it to employees’ section. I popped open my locker as I stepped out of my shoes and found my waitress outfit, complete with tights, clean and pressed, hanging in my locker. I grinned and whipped around, hoping to see my laundry guardian angel, but I only saw three topless hosts, and he wasn’t one of them.
I wiggled into my uniform, breathing in the smell of Ryder’s laundry detergent deeply, thinking that if his spicy aftershave scented them, too, it would be absolutely perfect. Or maybe it would drive me wild, and I wouldn’t be able to concentrate my whole shift. Either way, I knew for sure that I was dying to see him again.
Cara had left me a sticky note inside my locker saying, Lucked out and got the late shift, so Rob’ll give you a ride home. See you on the floor at six. I stuffed it in my bag. I liked Cara, but it was just as well. When she and I left the floor together, I ended up doing batshit insane things like stuffing twenties into strippers’ thongs. Not that that had turned out so badly.
Chapter 18
Later that week, after I’d worked the 10-10 shift, completely missing any homework time and barely seeing Mom, I caught a ride back to my place with Rob, who had the night off and was just hanging around the Starr waiting for Cara’s shift to end.
“Oh, that’s weird,” I said when I saw Bryan’s silver truck parked in its usual spot. “I didn’t know he was off tonight.”
“I didn’t either. We’re almost never off on the same night.” he said. “Hey! Maybe he wanted to surprise you!”
I gave him the side-eye. “Did you know something about this?”
He made an X across his chest. “Nothing,” he said in a dead-solemn voice. “I swear.”
Well, if Bryan wanted to surprise me, I wanted to make it worth his while. In the five weeks since I’d been there, I’d stashed away most of my cash tips in an envelope inside the Gideon’s Bible in my nightstand drawer, portioning out $150 for rent every week and a little bit every couple of days to do some grocery shopping for me and Mom. But I’d also collected a couple things for myself—a cute blouse here, a skirt there, and a couple sets of very lacy, very see-through lingerie. Bryan and I typically tore each other’s clothes off in such a frenzy that I either hadn’t had the time to put it on in the first place or he hadn’t noticed it, but maybe tonight could be different. I smiled to myself as I thought of the white lace set I’d step into—deliciously innocent and sexy all at the same time—and what his reaction would be. Maybe I’d even give him a strip show of my own.
I fumbled in my bag for my key ring and held it in my fingers for a full ten seconds before remembering—I’d given my key to Brian so he could pick up my dirty laundry again.
Good thing I actually liked Bryan’s place better anyway. I smiled as I reworked my plans. I didn’t have access to my cute lingerie now, but that didn’t mean we couldn’t have a really good time anyway. I shuffled over to Bryan’s door and gave it a couple good, hard knocks, then leaned back against the metal railing.
I waited ten seconds, then thirty, then a minute. Nothing.
I knocked again, this time speaking at the seam of the door. “Bryan? Ry?” Maybe he was asleep or in the shower. I wouldn’t mind it if he came to the door in just a towel. Not at all.
That was when I heard him moan. He only did it once, but it was loud and low and dragged out—almost exactly like it was when we…
Oh, shit.
I knew what my brain was thinking, but after the five weeks I’d known him for, the majority of which I’d spent screwing him silly, I just didn’t believe that Bryan would be in there with another girl. We’d had too many genuine moments for that, and besides, Cara had told me he wasn’t that kind of guy. Never had been.
“Bryan?” I tried again, praying to God it wasn’t what I thought. “It’s Andi.” Another deep groan came from inside, but this time it sounded distinctly like pain. That filled me with even more terror than the thought of him being in there with some other girl. Had he been mugged? Robbed? In a car crash? His car looked just fine.
Finally, the doorknob turned. �
�Hold on, baby,” he said, his words dragging and ragged. “I’m coming.” When he opened the door, his face was drawn, fallen, like his best friend had just died. He wore only a bathrobe and held it together in front of him gingerly with two fingers.
My eyes went wide. “Are you okay? What in the hell happened to you?”
My voice broke on the last word. I couldn’t help it; it was so clear from his voice that he was in agony. He turned around and shuffled back toward his bed where four pillows were stacked against the headboard. There was a drink and—weirdest of all—a bag of frozen peas on the nightstand. When he turned around and sat on the bed, his face twisted like it was the most unbearable pain he’d ever felt, and a strange half-moan, half-growl rumbled out of his throat.
“Help me lay back. It was tough enough to get up.”
I was starting to full-on panic now. “I’m sorry—you still had my key. I didn’t even know you were supposed to be home tonight. I was surprised to see the truck here. Are you sick or something?” I helped move his legs up onto the bed. When I dropped them, he sucked in a sharp breath. “Seriously,” I said, unexpectedly winded from the effort. A six-foot-one guy with all that muscle evidently weighed a whole hell of a lot. “Tell me what happened, Ry.”
He looked at me with the biggest, saddest puppy dog eyes ever. “You would hate me if you knew. You wouldn’t even want me anymore.”
The words twisted my heart and made it sink into my stomach. I couldn’t stand watching him like that without knowing what had happened for a single second longer. “Bryan,” I said, more harshly than I meant to.
I was about to ask him one more time when, sheepishly, he eased back on the pillows and pulled the bag of peas off the nightstand…and held it to his crotch.
I gasped, clapping one hand to my mouth and then the other. My voice was muffled, leaking out from between my fingers in steamy, hot breath. “Holy shit, Bryan. What happened to you? Did you get in a car accident? Did someone beat you up?” I rushed over, sitting beside him, and even the slightest movement on the bed made him wince.
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