"Yeah? So what?"
"Well, if he is a contract killer, how long do you think it's going to be before he takes a contract on the Emir?"
"I know what this is leading up to," Remo said.
"Yes, you do."
"We have to keep the Emir alive until he dies," Remo said.
"Exactly," Smith said.
"That makes marvelous sense," Remo said disgustedly. "You know . . . twenty million dollars could hire a Kamikaze squad, who'd sacrifice themselves to get the Emir. An attack like that couldn't miss."
"Maybe," said Smith.
"You want Chiun and me to protect him?"
"Not exactly," Smith said. "First, I want you to go and check his security."
"I hope it's better than the security on Romeo, or the Emir's probably already dead."
38
Smith winced. "Don't even joke about that. The President wants the Emir of Bislami kept alive at all costs."
"Until he dies," Remo said.
"That's correct," said Smith.
"Remo," said Chiun. "I don't understand why you have such trouble following even simple things. The Emperor is being perfectly clear."
"Thank you, Chiun," said Smith. He turned back to Remo. "Go check the Emir's security. See if you can find any holes. And then I want you to get this skull-crusher killer. We can't wait for him to come to take his shot at the Emir. Find him first."
"It shall be as you wish, Emperor," said Chiun.
Remo nodded. "But if he's dead when we get there, it's not our fault."
"Just go," said Smith, wincing again.
39
CHAPTER FIVE
They sat in the open cockpit of a Coast Guard launch carrying them from Sandy Hook to the Emir's island hideaway. Remo said, "You're very quiet, Chiun."
"I see," Chiun said. "When I am speaking, you interrupt me. Then, when I am quiet, you wish me to speak. So you may interrupt me again?"
"Don't bicker," Remo said. "Something's nibbling at you. What is it?"
"You are correct. Something is bothering me. It is an unpaid debt, owed to my village by the ancestors of this Emir of Bislami. His ancestors were among the most frugal . . ."
"They were cheap? With all their wealth?" "Interrupting me is getting to be a way of life with you," Chiun said.
"I'm sorry, Little Father. Please continue." "Thank you. It is a simple story. One I tried to tell back in Emperor Smith's office. But no one would listen."
"I'm listening already," Remo said. 'This happened many years ago, by your reckoning, when the Greekling ruled much of the East." "The Greekling?"
"Yes. Alexander, I believe his name was. Anyway, Master Ding of Sinanju was commissioned by the Bislamic throne to remove its most dangerous of
40
enemies. Master Ding did so, but when he returned to collect his payment, he found that the Emir, who had retained him, had died peaceably in his sleep. His son, the new Emir, refused to pay, saying the debt died with his father. It has been owed ever since. Why do you look so surprised?"
"It was really a simple story," Remo said.
"Did I not say it was?"
"Yes, but you always say that, then you go on forever and you end with some proverb that is totally confusing," Remo said.
"I never confuse. You are always confused."
"What?"
"Exactly," Chiun said. "A wonderful demonstration of my point."
"Chiun, are you going to hold the Emir responsible for his ancestor's debts?"
"I do not know. He is not the present monarch of his country. On the other hand, if he wants to return to his thrpne, he can hardly make much of a moral case if he goes around refusing to pay his empire's just and righteous debts. I will have to decide."
"Let me know what you decide."
Chiun nodded, then stared straight ahead at the shoreline of the small island, toward which the Coast Guard launch was racing.
They dropped ashore, off the launch, on the uninhabited side of the island. The main house faced in toward shore, and Remo had decided that the best way to test security would be to try to get to the Emir without notifying anyone they were there.
They moved up the sloping sand dune and through the scruffy clumps of ocean grass noiselessly.
41
Chiun touched Remo's shoulder and when Remo turned, the old man pointed to a sound detector wired into a bush. Remo nodded. It was clumsy but probably effective against most. Of course it would not be effective against practitioners of Sinanju, for one of the first things learned, and one of the most important lessons drilled into his head by Chiun, had been moving noiselessly.
"When one is silent," Chiun had said, "he has time to repair his mistakes. And having watched you train, you will need all the time you can get." And then he had set out a trail of peanut shells and crumpled paper and glass marbles and forced Remo to run across them, at top speed, without making a sound. And when Remo had complained after days of training that grew into months, Chiun had said simply: "No one whips the silent dog. Run."
By the time they had reached the top of the rise and could see the large house, they had run across electrified fences, mine fields, electric-eye alert systems, and rolls of barbed wire. Remo was impressed. It had not stopped him and Chiun, but nothing would have. Basically, the security was not all that bad. If the personnel had any training, Remo might even rate security as good.
Finally, he and Chiun strolled across the hundred yard open field that led to the rear of the mansion.
A guard on the door saw them and Remo and Chiun could hear him shout inside the house. Eight members of the Emir's personal guard poured from the house and raced toward them, rifles and handguns at the ready.
"Halt," one of them ordered.
42
"Why does everybody say 'Halt'?" Remo asked Chiun. "Why not just say 'Stop'?"
"I always like what they say in police movies," Chiun said. " 'Hold it right there, pardner.' "
"You've got them mixed up again," Remo said. He was going to explain when he felt his ribs nudged by a rifle barrel.
He turned and addressed the man with the most braid on his comic-opera uniform.
"We are from the United States government, sent to assist in the security for the Emir."
"We were not informed that your government was sending anyone," the braided man said. He wore a flat-topped, pilot-type hat, and strings of greasy hair hung out from below the brim.
"We asked that you not be notified. We wanted to test your defenses for ourselves. As you can see, we are here."
Slowly, imperceptibly, the eight guards had surrounded Remo and Chiun.
"Where is a U.S. representative?" Remo said. "He can check our credentials."
"We are perfectly capable of checking your credentials ourselves," the leader said. "We do not appreciate this intrusion."
Remo raised his hands in a gesture of wanting to reason with the spokesman. "Now listen," he started. One of the guards mistook the raised hands as an act of aggression and swung at Remo with the stock of his rifle. No one but Chiun saw Remo move, but suddenly the man was sailing over the heads of the other guards. He landed, breathless but unhurt, in a clump of bushes.
43
"I don't want to hurt anybody," Remo said. "You will not hurt us," the leader said, although with more confidence than he felt. He looked behind him at his soldier, a hand-picked, trained soldier, slowly lifting himself from the bushes. He had not even seen the man move to touch the soldier. Yet he must have moved. Still, how had he managed to throw the man so far?
For a split second, there was a stalemate and then a woman stepped out onto the rear porch of the house.
She had long red hair and equally red lips. Her figure was full, but youthful, shown off neatly by a peasant blouse and a pair of designer jeans, which differed from non-designer jeans only by a label sewn onto the right rear waistband.
Remo heard someone whisper, "Princess Sarra."
The Emir's younger
sister.
A Princess in jeans, Remo thought. It struck him as funny. The Emir had been overthrown by a lot of sloganeering, marching students, many of them women who had been allowed into college for the first time by the Emir's modernism. They too wore
Western garb and listened to rock-'n'-roll. And they had agitated for the Emir's overthrow, calling his regime "oppressive." They had finally gotten their wish. The Emir had left the country. It had been
taken over by a band of religious zealots who imme- We are-
diately prohibited women from wearing Western clothing. Women were also prohibited from attending college. When the ones who had protested the Emir's "oppression" had tried to march to protest these new rulings, they were beaten and raped in the
streets.
44
As the Princess Sarra approached them, Remo saw that she was no child, but a mature woman, probably nearing forty. But she walked erect, regally and proudly, and Remo felt a stirring inside himself that for a moment he could not identify as either respect or lust.
She caught his eyes and held them. A half-smile formed on her lips.
Remo nodded. He had decided. It was lust.
"Stand aside," she told the leader of the guards.
"But, Princess . . ."
"Go inside. Bring out the American agent in charge. Go now, fool, before these two men destroy my brother's vaunted Royal Guards."
The man bowed and backed off.
"Your name?" the Princess asked Remo.
"Remo."
"Only royalty has one name. Remo what?"
"Remo Schwartzenegger," said Remo. "And this is Chiun. One name only."
"Your companion?" she asked.
Remo shook his head. "Much more," was all he said. From the corner of his eyes, he saw that Chiun
, , . ..,„., , „. , . was pleased with the answer.
had agitated for the Emir s overthrow, calling his * . u. ,
. „ . „ „, u j « il m. +u • You claim to be representatives of your govern-
regime oppressive. They had finally gotten their vJ &
"We will see," Princess Sarra said.
They stood, eyes locked, and Remo could feel doors opening inside of him, doors that he had thought were closed for good. Princess Sarra had green eyes. Her waist was incredibly slim. Remo wanted to look at her bosom, but he felt that some-
45
how it would seem insulting. He looked anyway and
And short women.
fatandfifty- Churn's story.
"What's this, what's this?" the man demanded, approaching the group.
Princess Sarra eyed the man with distinct disapproval as he stopped alongside her.
"What's going on?" he asked.
Remo took out the identification card that Smith had given him for this purpose and showed it to the man. The man inspected it carefully, looking at both sides of the card which bore the names of Remo Schwartzenegger and Chiun.
Princess Sarra smiled. The American agent tried to keep at the Prin-
The leader of the guards reappeared from inside the house, along with a harried looking man in a tweed suit with a wide rayon tie. He was short and
cess's side, but her disdain for him and his company was obvious. Inside, she led them to a sitting room while the agent went off to check out Remo and
"You can't go," she told the Royal Guard who had started to crowd into the room after them.
They hesitated. Their leader began to speak.
"Out," Princess Sarra ordered in a tone that allowed no discussion, and the men dutifully filed out.
"Be seated," the Princess told Remo and Chiun in a voice that was an invitation, even though the words themselves were a command.
Remo took a cushion from the couch and dropped it on the floor for Chiun. While Chiun settled him-
"Well?" the Princess asked sdf CIOSsA^ on the cushion> Remo relaxed back It seems to be m order, the man admitted. . ., b, „ fu m,- „> ,,»o ™
"Seems to be? Don't you know?" °nt° ^ f^' He MChm™ ^ OT ,
"Well I it looks okay I don't " ' helooked at Prmcess Sarra- He knew he was m for
"We will'take these men inside while'you check another lecture' Number 912 in Chiun's Catalog:
further wkh your government," she said. She turned to Chiun. "Will you step inside?"
"Thank you," Chiun said. "I am old and frail and my people are so poor because of unpaid debts that . . ."
"Don't start, Chiun," cautioned Remo. "We'd be delighted to come inside," he told the Princess.
Again, the half-smile formed on her full lips and she turned and walked toward the house. Remo watched her buttocks undulate as he followed her.
"How women dilute the ability of a Master of Sin-arrju to perform at any level of consistency." To which Remo usually delivered Pupil's Comeback Number Two: "Who cares?"
"Are you here to help my brother?" Sarra asked
him.
"We are what we said," explained Remo. "We came to examine the security of this island and to see if your brother is well protected."
"Obviously, the security is severely flawed, for
She was a tall woman in her high heel boots, stand- I here you are."
ing almost as tall as Remo himself. i «Not necessarily," Remo said.
He did not mind at all. He liked tall women. ft "Either that," she said, "or you two are extraordi-
46 I 47
f
nary kinds of men. Are you, Remo Schwartzeneg- j but inclined his head, acknowledging the apology. Ser?" "It is apparent from your presence that our secu-
Chiun answered for him. "He isn't," Chiun said. "I am. Actually, he is kind of ordinary."
Another man entered the room. He was tall and his hair was pitch-black except for a sprinkle of gray at the temples. His eyes sparkled with intensity, and his mouth looked like a thin slit cut in paper. His skin was milk-white. He wore a small beard.
"Excuse me, Princess," he said.
"Oh, Pakir. Come in." She took the man's arm and guided him to the center of the room.
"We are not quite sure yet, Pakir, whether these gentlemen are our guests or our prisoners. Although I have some doubt about our being able to keep them prisoner if we wanted to."
"So I've heard. Fortunately we won't have to. We have checked with Washington and their authorization to be here comes directly from the White
rity measures—and your country's—are rather po-
rous.
"We were just discussing that," Sarra said.
"I must tell you that I do not appreciate the way you have been treating my men," Pakir told the Princess.
"In the first place," Sarra told him coldly, "the Royal Guards are my brother's men, not yours. Second, I speak to whom I want, how I want. If you have criticisms, voice them to my brother, later. I will not quarrel with you in front of our guests."
"As you wish, Princess," Pakir replied politely. He nodded at Remo. "The Emir would like to see both of you."
Remo and Chiun stood. Sarra told Remo, "I will join you after I've changed. My brother does not appreciate the dress of Western women." She ran her
House-" I hands along the outsides of her thighs. "I, on the
"Well, then," she said and the half-formed smile [ otnerhand, find it very comfortable."
that had been on her face for the past fifteen minutes blossomed wide for Remo. "In that case, let me introduce our guests. Gentlemen, this is my brother's . . . how do you say it ... right-hand man, Perce Pakir."
"Remo Schwartzenegger," said Remo. He indicated his silent companion. "This is Chiun."
"A Chinese."
"Korean," Remo said quickly—quick enough to
save Pakir's life. "Please, don't make that mistake again. He's very sensitive."
"I apologize for my effrontery," Pakir said to Chiun, bowing slightly at the waist. Chiun glared,
48 E 49
"See you later, Princess," Remo told her.
&
nbsp; She tossed her hair behind her shoulders and smiled broadly at him. "Yes. Later," she said.
Remo and Pakir watched her walk from the room. Chiun watched Remo watching and shook his head sadly. Remo smiled at the old man and shrugged. Chiun's expression remained impassive. But he slowly rose and followed Remo and Pakir from the room.
CHAPTER SIX
Even ill, even propped up in bed on pillows, the Emir was royalty. He exuded nobility. Remo noticed it even as he walked into the room.
Chiun was the only other man he had ever noticed to have that quality.
"Your Highness," Pakir said. "This is Mister Remo Schwartzenegger of the United States Government."
Again, the man had ignored Chiun.
"Your Highness, this is Chiun," Remo said. "He is my companion and very much more."
"Yes," the Emir said. "I can see that. Thank you, Pakir. You may go."
"Your Highness, I wish to point out ..."
The emaciated figure in the bed waved a bony, weak hand at his aide-de-camp. "I am sure, Perce, that I shall be quite safe with these two gentlemen. Please leave us."
"As you wish," Pakir said. "I shall be alert, should you need me." He bowed his way from the room.
Chiun was staring intently at the man in the bed, and Remo hoped that the old Korean had not decided to hold the deposed monarch accountable for that ancient debt.
"Please," the Emir beckoned. "Come closer, both
Remo and Chiun moved forward to opposite sides of the bed, Chiun still staring intently at the Emir who seemed not to notice the scrutiny he was under.
"It disturbs me that you were able to breach our defenses so easily," the Emir said.
He was gray-haired and incredibly thin. The skin on his face was loose, as if his skin had been a balloon which had suddenly deflated. Remo could see that he was a very tall man, and at one time he must have been imposing, but now he was just bones and loose flesh.
"It should not disturb Your Highness," Remo told him. "No one else could have gotten through that security so easily. With a few suggestions from us, your security should be tight enough to protect you from everything short of an all-out army attack."
The man in the bed laughed dryly, not by choice but as a by-product of his illness. "I don't think anyone wants me quite that badly, yet."
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