by Linda Style
“Where’s the bathroom?”
She almost laughed. She’d braced for the worst, and all he wanted was to pee. “Right there, between the two bedrooms.”
He wheeled forward, glancing around. “It’s a big bedroom. And a really big house for one person.”
“It suits me fine.” She walked over and drew open the wood blinds just enough to filter in the pink, red and rust-colored hues of another dusty sunset behind the red rock mountains.
For the most part, her house was a mix of art and treasures she’d picked up here and there. A rustic table from Mexico, a Tuscan urn, photography and paintings she just happened to like. As an artist, she knew colors, but she wasn’t a decorator—according to her mother anyway.
She went to the closet and flicked on the light. “I’m sorry there’s not a lot of room in this closet. I needed more space for storage. But there’s still enough room for—”
“For my extensive wardrobe?” he finished for her.
“For whatever,” she said, not checking her annoyance. She placed her hands on her hips. “I seem to say all the wrong things.”
A quizzical expression crossed his face. “It was a joke.”
“Oh.”
“On the plus side, I now know I’m not very adept at telling jokes.” He wheeled over to the window and stared out. After a moment, he said, “Can you sit for a minute?” He kept looking out the window without turning around.
Sit. People asked you to sit when they had something bad to say. She walked to the leather chair next to the writing desk and sat on the ottoman. “Okay, I’m sitting.”
When he faced her, the set of his jaw said she was right. His face was shadowed, making him look tired and drawn. Still, he was a handsome man.
“First of all,” he said softly, “I want you to know I’m really grateful for all your help—even though it might not seem like it sometimes. And I know my being here has to be a huge imposition.” He levered himself up a little, shoulders back. “And sometimes I’ve been a real jerk. But, the thing is…” He stopped, then started again. “The thing is…I don’t want you to treat me like a guest. If I’m going to be self-sufficient, I have to do whatever I can for myself. I might get crabby…and discouraged. I know that because I did while I was in the hospital. But it won’t be because of you. I want you to remember that. And I’ll do everything in my power to be out of your hair as soon as possible—and repay you as soon as I can.”
Heaving an internal sigh, she knew exactly how he felt. During the two years she’d lived with her parents after the attack, they’d dissected everything she said and did. By the time she left, she’d felt as if she’d been swallowed up and spit out in pieces. And then Dylan took over where they left off.
She’d been directing Linc just as her parents had directed her. Despite their noble intentions, she’d felt helpless and incompetent and unable to think for herself. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel—”
“Okay. You have to stop that. You can’t apologize. You’ve done nothing except try to help me. I just want to be responsible for…whatever happens in my life. Good or bad. If I never remember who I am, I’ll have to live with the person I become. And I don’t think I can become anyone if I don’t start holding myself accountable.”
His words sent a wave of guilt coursing through her. She’d been focused only on what she needed to do to ease her conscience…to somehow make herself feel better for the mistake she’d made. She dredged up an understanding smile. “Right. I get what you’re saying. I really do. I won’t bother you.” She stood, started to leave.
“Tori…” His voice became soft again. “I do want your help. I’m grateful for it. I just have to do my share.”
She nodded.
“I have a plan.” His expression brightened. “The first thing is to get out of this chair. And while I’m working on that, I want to find out everything I can about myself.” His eyes grew dark. “And I’m going to do everything in my power to find the guy who let me rot in prison for ten years while he went free.”
Tori’s breath caught.
“And that’s where I can use some help.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
TWO DAYS LATER, between workout sets, Tori rested on a bench in the exercise room. She glanced in the wall of mirrors, and re-secured her ponytail. Studying her face, she touched her cheek. What would be like to look in the mirror and see a stranger…to have no past life? For her, it might be a good thing. There wasn’t a day that went by that she didn’t have some kind of reminder of that horrible night.
She’d give anything to blot it out forever. But she couldn’t. And now, Linc’s presence made it a 24/7 reminder.
Her bold idea to help Linc seemed to be backfiring at every turn. With every word, every glance, every time she did anything with him, she worried about when he was going to recognize her. What the hell was she doing bringing him here? And now he wanted her to help him find the man who raped her. If he succeeded, she’d have to face her attacker all over again.
She shivered, rubbed her arms. She glanced at the heavy-duty door across the hall. Her safe room. No help when the enemy was in her head.
The sooner Linc was gone, the better. In the last two days, he’d made appointments for both a physical therapist and a shrink. The PT, a friend of Natalia’s, worked on his own, but was affiliated with one of the doctor’s offices in Sedona. Their first appointment was this afternoon, and she hoped Linc liked him because he was the only one in the area who made home visits. The psychiatrist was in Sedona, but Linc couldn’t get an appointment until next week, giving the doctor time to get Linc’s hospital records.
She picked up the five-pound weights and started working her biceps, the first part of her routine after stretching. Yesterday, she’d given Linc her old laptop so he could do some research online. The laptop had long been gathering dust in a closet and had been cleaned of any information she’d had on it since she’d planned to give it to the local charity. Good thing she’d never gotten around to it and saved her from having to explain why he couldn’t use her computer.
He’d brought with him some of the files his attorney had given him and apparently he was still waiting on the trial transcripts from the court. That would take a while, up to six weeks, but in the meantime, he was researching all the time and last night, she’d seen a sliver of light under his door in the wee hours when she’d gotten up for a drink.
Linc had also made a half dozen lists of things he needed to do, most of them an effort to find people who’d known him before he was incarcerated. He seemed obsessed with creating a past for himself, a personal narrative that would tell him who he was…even if he didn’t remember it.
He definitely wasn’t the man she’d believed him to be, and she couldn’t help wondering how different life might’ve been if they really had been friends before.
Not that it mattered. The past was irreversible. As was the future where she and Linc were concerned.
Finished with the smaller weight, she picked up the next size and began another set. She hadn’t heard from Gordon in a couple of days, she realized, which wasn’t uncommon when he was busy, but she hadn’t heard from her parents, either, and that was unusual. Normally, they called her several times a week, especially if her mother was going through one of her guilty periods and thought they’d been away too long.
But right now, Tori was glad they were gone. Glad she hadn’t talked to them since bringing Linc to Spirit Creek. She needed time to mentally gear up for the battle that would ensue.
She finished the set, got up and walked out some kinks. Only a couple more exercises to complete her program, then she’d shower, and go to work. As she reached for the weights to finish, a rustling noise sounded behind her. She swung around, arms raised defensively.
Linc lifted a hand as if to ward off a blow. “Whoa there,” he said. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“Oh, geez! Tori heaved a sigh. Just Linc. Not― Oh, shit. �
��No, I wasn’t…” She sat on the weight bench, began her curls again. “I mean… no big deal. I was just…preoccupied and overreacted.”
“Well, I’m glad you didn’t take a swing. You look like you know what you’re doing.”
She kept curling. “I’ve had a little training.”
“A little?” He shook his head. “Looked like more than a little to me.”
“Okay. I’ve had a lot of training.” Then she quickly added, “I thought it might be good exercise. But as I got better, my instructor convinced me to go for a belt.”
Interest flashed in his eyes. “And did you?”
“I did. But it was a long time ago. I don’t go anymore.”
“How come?”
She shrugged. “I lost interest, which isn’t hard to do when you don’t have anyone to practice with.”
His gaze traveled over her. “You could practice with me.” His tone was low, sexy.
Good grief. Was he flirting with her?
“Once I get out of this chair, that is.”
Her stomach squeezed. “And the sooner that happens, the better.” She reached for the heavier set of dumbbells, turned to the mirror again, her back to him and started pumping iron.
“Where are the dogs?”
“Outside. They like to be outside,” she said, breathing heavier with each lift. In the mirror, she could see Linc behind her perusing the equipment. He looked like a bodybuilder himself in a white muscle tee and sweat shorts they’d picked up on the drive from Phoenix. Even with the bandage on his leg and the small wrap around his forearm, he looked good.
The skin around the bandage on his leg was red and she could see some of the stitches below the wrapping. He’d been advised to leave the bandage off for a few hours every day to help the healing, but he hadn’t done such a hot job of putting it back on. It was mostly for protection, the nurse had said, so Tori wasn’t going to volunteer to help fix it.
“You must work out on a regular basis,” Linc said. “You look…well-toned.”
Her blood rushed like a sixteen-year-old on a first date. It had been a long time since a man had paid attention to her in that way. But most men didn’t see her in workout clothes, either. “I try to stay fit. Most of the time anyway. I have for about eight years. How about you?”
He frowned. “You know, one of these times when you ask a question, I just might surprise you and know the answer.” Then, flexing his biceps, he said, “I may have been doing something, though.”
Tori toweled her face, wished he’d leave. But he didn’t. Instead he wheeled over to the chin-up bar, braced his hands on the arms of the chair and lifted himself to a standing position on his good foot. He grabbed the bar and began some pull-ups.
She was about to say he should be careful not to hurt his arm, but stopped herself. If it hurt, he’d know soon enough.
Standing, he was taller than she’d initially thought. Six feet or maybe a little more. He’d been only twenty-two when she’d seen him in court years ago, his body lean and wiry. Now his shoulders were broad, his waist narrow. Watching him, she felt like a spectator at the scene of an accident—she didn’t want to look, but couldn’t help herself. And as the muscles in his back flexed with each pull, desire grew low in her belly.
She got up, turned away, but she couldn’t escape his image in the mirrors. It had taken two years of therapy before she’d even begun to have a normal life. She hadn’t been sure about marrying Dylan, even though she loved him. Her parents had warned against it, and Dylan had lobbied for it. In the end, the decision she’d made was wrong. For some reason, neither she nor Dylan were able to put the assault behind them. She couldn’t help blaming herself for not going with Dylan that night, and once in the middle of a fight, he’d said the same thing. She knew then that nothing could save their marriage.
Though she and Serena joked about guys and dating all the time, she hadn’t really thought about a man in a sexual way since Dylan. Now that she had…the man who’d sparked her interest wouldn’t want her if she were the last woman in the universe once he found out who she really was.
A cruel irony.
“Tori? Earth to Tori.”
Linc’s voice and his hand waving in her face brought her to attention. “What? What is it?”
“Not much. I just wanted to ask you about a photo I saw in the family room on my way through.”
Tori picked up her towel, her pulse racing. She’d put away all the photos, she was sure of it. She mentally scanned each room in the house. “Oh? Which one is that?” Sweat ran down the inside of her arms.
Linc pushed forward in his chair, closer to her than comfort allowed, and studying her face, said, “The picture on the bookshelf. Who’s the couple? Your parents?”
“Yes…But, it’s a really old photo.”
Questions formed in his eyes. “I had the weirdest feeling when I looked at it…almost as if I knew them from somewhere.”
Her heartbeat stuttered. “Really.” She stood, blotted the sweat from her neck and face.
“Yeah. It’s like when you have a word on the tip of your tongue and you just can’t quite spit it out.”
“I have that problem sometimes,” she said. “It’s so annoying.”
“This was different, though. It was more of a gut feeling…something internal.”
“Well, lots of people say I resemble my mother. Maybe that’s the connection. I look like my mother, and you know me, so—” she shrugged, palms up “—so, there you go.”
He kept studying her. She raised a hand to chew a cuticle, a leftover habit from years ago when she used to bite her fingernails.
“Yeah,” he said. “That’s probably it. The weird thing, though, is that I had that feeling looking at both of them.”
“Déjà vu,” she said quickly. “Or maybe we’re long lost cousins somehow, or …who knows. And now, I have to take a shower because I’ve got some errands to run before your appointment.”
Linc opened his mouth, ready to say something else, but didn’t. She heard the outside gate buzzer go off. It had to be Serena or Natalia. No one else would drop in this early. But now that Linc was staying with her, she doubted either one of her friends would come unannounced. “It’s probably a salesman,” she said on her way out. But she didn’t hear the dogs, so it had to be someone she knew well.
“If you need help to get rid of him, just holler.”
“I won’t. I have skills, remember?” She headed for the front door, glanced out the window on the way and saw the outer gate swinging open.
What? The dogs! Blood pounded in her veins as she hurried to the door to look out the peephole. But as she reached the door, she stopped and took a breath. Bruno and Cleo were trained not to leave the yard, trained to protect her.
Peering out, she saw nothing, then caught a flash of movement near a tree outside the gate. But it was so quick, she wasn’t sure if she had actually seen it or not. And where were the dogs? She threw open the door and started out, but as she did, her cell phone rang. She grabbed it from the table in the foyer as she dashed outside. “Bruno—Cleo,” she called, then glanced at the caller ID. Dylan. She called the dogs once again, and then answering, she tried to sound calm. “Hi Dylan.” She walked to the side of the house, scanning everywhere.
“Tori, are you okay?”
The concern in Dylan’s voice told her he’d heard about Crusoe’s release. “I’m fine. I was just getting in the shower,” she lied. “What’s up?”
“What’s up?” His voice was incredulous. “I heard… I was worried about you.”
“I’m fine, Dylan. Really.” Seeing nothing on this side of the house, she rushed to the other side. Except for the patio and garden, the three-acre terrain surrounding the house had been left natural, rocky and hilly, dotted with piñon pines and mesquite. The dogs liked to explore, but they always came when she called them.
“This is me, Tori. I know you. You’re on edge. I can hear it in your voice.”
�
�If I’m edgy, it’s because I’ve got work to do in town and I need to take a shower and get there. I’m late already.”
Silence. Then, “Okay. I was just concerned. You can understand that, can’t you?”
“Of course. And I’m grateful. But it’s unnecessary. You can rest easy.” She hustled around to the back patio where Bruno and Cleo sometimes liked to lie in the sun. Nothing. “Are you in Phoenix? Staying at your mother’s?” she asked, to get him off the subject.
“Yes and no respectively. I’ve got to go to Toronto this afternoon.”
“More business?” The divorce hadn’t been all her fault. His frequent business travel had played a role, as well. In the end, though, they both knew that what had happened to Tori had somehow changed things between them. They just didn’t know what to do or how to fix it. Even counseling hadn’t helped.
“Yep. My life is just one big cross-country flight these days.”
“Nothing different there.” She started down the path to the gate, all the while searching for the dogs, her breathing coming faster and faster.
“Okay. That’s my cue to go. But remember, I’m only a phone call away.”
“I know. Thanks for that,” she said and clicked off.
As she reached the open gate, a chill ran up her spine. Not only was the gate left open, the security box lay on the ground, the wires disconnected.
CHAPTER TWELVE
LINC KEPT LISTENING for Tori to say something to whoever was at the door, but didn’t hear a thing. He didn’t know if she really thought it was a salesman, but if it was, and she couldn’t get rid of him, maybe he could help.
“Tori,” he called out. “Do you want the bottle of water you left in here?”
When she didn’t answer, he grabbed the bottle, and started to get up. A sharp pain jagged down his leg. He flopped back in the chair. “Damn it!” That was the third time he’d not been thinking and had tried to stand like a normal person. Ignoring the pain, he pushed the buttons and maneuvered his chair through the door and down the hall toward the living room. As he got to the end of the hall, he heard Tori outside calling the dogs, and just as he rounded the corner, she barreled through the door.
