The joyous expressions on Etta’s face meant I had to find a way to convince Etta to keep my daughter during the week the way she used to before Phoenix messed everything up. “Ms. Et—” Before I could introduce Etta to Antonio, she was heading toward the exit.
“Bye, Teacake. I love you.”
“Bye, Grandma!” Nya yelled waving frantically. “Love you too!”
Sarah looked up at Antonio. “Indoor voice, Daddy?” she asked as though she wanted to scream too.
“That’s right, darling,” he responded, then asked me, “Is Etta okay? I was just about to say hello.”
“Don’t take it personal, she always has some place to be,” I told him, feeling slightly embarrassed.
“How’s Alexis?” Antonio asked.
I prayed endlessly for my sister. Mother texted us group updates. Said there was no reason for all of us to sit and wait.
“She’s the same,” I replied, swallowing my sorrow. I’d make good on my promise to give her a part.
“You want to place the order like the last time?” Antonio asked, then told Sarah, “Save your muffin for dessert, darling.”
Sarah sat her cupcake near me. “Don’t let my daddy eat it.”
I winked at her. It was best to request separate toppings considering none of us had the same favorites. I ordered, “Meat lovers for Antonio. Vegetarian for me. Cheese for Nya. Pepperoni for Sarah. And a pitcher of unsweetened ice tea.”
“My daddy always eat my food,” Nya said.
“Always” was an exaggeration, though Phoenix did occasionally consume what Nya left on her plate. I made it a practice not to consume unnecessary calories.
Sarah questioned Nya, “Where he at?”
Nya hunched her shoulders. “You want me to teach you how to bake muffins?”
Sarah smiled, shaking her head.
I was glad Nya didn’t mention Phoenix often. Primarily all he’d done was transport my baby from one place to another or leave her alone in Ebony’s guest room while he fucked Ebony in a different room. She’d declined our million-dollar offer. Refused to give a reason.
I wondered where Phoenix was. Didn’t care enough to find him.
“I have a surprise for everyone,” Antonio announced.
I had a love-hate relationship with the unknown. If I never had another surprise in my lifetime, that would be okay. The girls stared at the envelope in Antonio’s hand.
“Please, end the suspense,” I said, wanting to snatch the mystery that he waved in front of us.
“We are all going on an Alaskan cruise,” he said, then handed me the envelope. “All you have to do, sweetheart, is select the dates.”
CHAPTER 42
Blake
A mother was not supposed to outlive her kids.
“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs twenty-second chapter, sixth verse. I knew that Scripture well.
Holding Alexis’s hand, I wondered, had I instilled my characteristics in her? “Don’t give up, Alexis. I’m right here, honey, and I’m not going anywhere until you open your eyes and speak to me. You won’t believe how beautiful Domino is.” I smiled. Squeezed her fingers. Yes, she would. “He looks just like James.”
In parts, I’d read the book of Psalms, John, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes to Alexis. Alternated massaging her extremities—arms, hands, legs, feet—every hour to circulate the blood. The only time I’d left her side was to visit ICU to see my grandson, use the restroom, or to freshen up.
“Ms. Crystal, here’s a little something for you to eat. Please. If you don’t, we’re going to have to admit you to the hospital,” the nurse said.
Guess she never had a child this close to death. With every breath my baby was fighting for her life. I would never mistreat or disrespect her again.
“Okay,” I said, taking a few bites of the bland chicken salad before sitting the container on Alexis’s bedside table. Until the Lord made His decision to bring my child home or give her back to me, this hospital was my new residence.
Bing texted, Give baby girl a kiss for me. I’ll be there tomorrow morning.
Whenever anyone requested I hug, kiss, or say hello to Alexis, I did.
The door opened. A familiar face entered.
Spencer gave me a much-needed endearing embrace. I didn’t want Spencer to let go. Sobbing, I released my fear. His comfort was temporary yet welcome. I didn’t want him as my man. His compassion wasn’t sexual. I had a fiancé whom I could not wait to marry.
The negative things that I thought were worth my time and energy? Watching someone who may not recover taught me to release my animosity. I was striving to forgive and appreciate others. Give and receive love, not hate. Determined to value family instead of devaluing people, I knew it was time for me to focus on being my best. That meant I had to start with my truth.
“I can take the night shift. You should go home and get some rest,” Spencer said, sitting next to me. “I’ll take care of dude.”
She called him chick. He referred to her as a dude. They were definitely related. Before Alexis was born, Conner told me not to contact him. I hated him, yet I’d honored that. Being here with my daughter, I was glad she’d met her father. Conner was the third in the lineup of four men to abandon me. If I counted my dad, that would up my count.
Men justified being irresponsible and inconsiderate.
I’d changed my mind. Telling the truth wasn’t happening. I didn’t owe my exes, my daughters, or society a confession.
“I don’t need a break,” I told him. “I believe she’s going to come out of this coma. I know you hear me, lil girl. Stop pretending. You know what? I talked with the nurses today. Domino is getting stronger by the hour. He’s gained two ounces. He’s a fighter. I need you to do the same. For Domino. For me.”
“Me too, Sis,” Spencer added. “I got you.”
Spencer’s last words made me chuckle. I thought when he’d told me, “I got you” or “I love you,” I was special. Hearing him say it to another woman let me know that was how he expressed himself with everyone.
“I’m really sorry about your uncle raping you. And for what it’s worth, I deeply regret not keeping your secret,” I told Spencer.
His chest rose, then deflated. “Wasn’t your fault.”
That I’d told or that it had happened? Focusing on my daughter, I knew this would not be the time for Alexis to let go. Crystal women were born warriors.
Spencer held my hand.
“For what it’s worth, I will always love you, Blake. We were just two damaged people looking for someone else to repair our broken hearts. Isn’t it funny how we want it all yet we don’t believe we’re deserving,” he said. “I mean, I expect the best in my head but my heart is all fucked up. I wonder if my real ride-or-die unconditional woman is out there looking for me.”
My eyes shifted toward Alexis.
“Dude knows how I feel about you, Fabulous.”
Not putting a thing past Alexis, she could probably slip into the bright white light, come back, ruin my life, then return to heaven. God would give her a pass to get in. I did not know a single person who had stayed mad with Alexis. Chanel and James had justifiable cause and they’d both forgiven Alexis.
“I used to feel the way you do until I met Bing.” Breaking his grip, I had to emphasize, “He shows me what real men do. Vacations without expectations of any form of indebtedness. He never asked me what my girls needed. He asked them and he handled it. Nothing he does is to impress me. Everything he’s done has blessed me. I never believed in my heart that you were genuine. And I was right. But”—I placed my hand over his—“it’s time for the man inside of you to stop being afraid to grow up. You’re a good person, Spencer. And, your ride-or-die is out there. And when you meet her . . .” I paused.
“What?” he asked softly.
“Don’t stab her in the heart. Men are good at doing that.”
A tear fell from his left e
ye, then his right. I looked at Alexis. “Oh, my, gosh,” I whispered, then pointed at her face. She was crying through closed eyelids.
I told Spencer, “Hurry. Go get the nurse.”
He yelled from the doorway, “Nurse! Nurse!”
I shook my head. He had a ways to go down that grown-up trail but I knew he’d get there. I saw her eyeballs shifting. What was it that made her cry? I didn’t care.
“Baby, I know you can hear Mama. Alexis, I want you to open your eyes. You can do it. Domino needs you. Your family needs you. Your mother needs you.”
Spencer said, “I need you. You can’t leave me. Dude, you already knowing James gon’ dress Dom with all that plaid stuff. I’m telling you. You better wake up.”
Her eyelids fluttered. I whispered to Spencer, “Keep talking to her.”
I recorded a video of my baby opening her eyes. Spencer started telling funny stories, then said, “Dude, you’re the only person I know that knows how to keep a secret. Thank you.”
Alexis stared at him. I scanned back and forth between the two.
Was he referring to the secret I spoiled or was this something new?
CHAPTER 43
Mercedes
“Have a good day, kids.”
I gave Brandy a kiss. Brandon turned sideways, gave me a one-arm hug. Straightening his tie, I told him, “Tuck in your shirt.”
“Mom,” he protested. “You’re embarrassing me.”
“Son, give your mother a kiss,” Benjamin said. Picking up Brandy, he asked, “Who’s Daddy’s girl?”
“Me. I am. I’m Daddy’s girl. Love you, Daddy. Love you, Mommy,” she said. She interlocked arms with her girlfriend, and they walked toward the gymnasium where the students assembled before class.
Brandon scanned the playground. Stared up at me with wide, fearful eyes.
Not wanting to go against what Benjamin told Brandon to do or make my son uncomfortable, I told Brandon, “Save my kiss. I’ll get it later. Go.”
This was the first time Benjamin and I had been in the same vehicle since I’d let myself into his mistress’s house, thanks to Dakota. Long before I’d fired her, she told me to have a locksmith copy all the keys on Benjamin’s chain. Only one didn’t fit any of the locks in our home.
There were limited places a man could keep a key, if a woman gave him one. Car. Under the mat in his car. Glove box. Armrest. Change or sunglass compartment. Key chain. Tiny spaces in his car, backpack, or wallet. Inside his cell phone case. With the proper tools provided by my investigator, I could expeditiously pick a lock. And if there was a keypad, I knew all the combinations Benjamin used.
Bet that bitch Arizona started setting her home alarm.
I tried doing what Bing advised. It was not in my nature to cater to my husband or kids. I was where I was accustomed to being, in the driver’s seat of his car. His life.
Starting the engine, I said to my husband, “Explain the ring, the flowers, the champagne, the perfume that you bought your mistress,” knowing he hadn’t given me a gift outside of my birthday, our anniversary, and holidays in two years.
I heard him exhale through his nostrils. His lips were so tight saliva couldn’t ooze out. “Mercedes, I told you last night and the night before, I bought everything as parting gifts. I was ending it with her. The ring was for you. Not her.”
The bullshit men came up with. Was I supposed to believe any of that?
“Her sucking your dick was a parting gift too, Benjamin? I didn’t see you fighting her off as your cum spilled out of her mouth.”
My fingers gripped the steering wheel. I plunged the accelerator.
“Honey, pull over. Let me drive.”
“No. You like living on the edge. Fucking her. I shouldn’t have let you stick the tip of your head inside of me. No telling what you gave me.” Rattling my head, I merged onto the freeway. “You might want to answer me, Benjamin.”
Calmly, he replied, “Honey, please. Pull over. I’ll drive.”
I accelerated to ninety. Weaved between cars. Heading south on Interstate 75, I had no physical destination.
“Nothing I seem to do pleases you. You don’t want to suck my dick. You get mad when another woman enjoys it. You don’t appreciate my dropping off and picking up the kids, cooking, cleaning, nothing. Why are you so angry?”
I switched pedals. Stumped the brakes, then sped up. “Didn’t you forget something?”
“No!” he yelled, bracing his hands on the dash.
“Yes, you did!” I yelled. “What do you do for me?”
“Everything!” Heaving, he continued, “I do is for you and our kids.”
“You take that bitch out three to four times a week to make me happy. Is that it?” I drove faster. “Oh, you humiliate me, then call me angry, then lick her pussy to apologize for the fucked-up shit you’ve done to me!” I increased my speed. “Is that it? When was the last time we went on a date?”
Plunging the accelerator, I screamed, “You can answer at any time!”
“When was the last time you put on lingerie?” he lamented.
Really? “So that’s it. I’m no longer the mother of your children. I’m a piece of ass that don’t put out. Is that my worth to you?”
“You said it. Not me.”
I slowed my pace—in the fast lane—to fifty miles per hour then told my husband, “Get out.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“Okay, if you won’t get out, I will.”
Parking in the emergency lane, I opened my door, stood near the rail, started crying. I wasn’t going to jump in front of traffic. Killing myself was never a consideration. I was just having a moment. The worst part was my husband was clueless.
Benjamin lowered my window. “Honey, please. Get in the car. If you want me to prove to you it’s over with Arizona, we can go to her house now. I’ll tell her in front of you.”
I got in the car. Drove the legal speed limit en route to our house. His offering to tell her he was done while I was there gave me the satisfaction I needed. I reached into my purse and gave Benjamin the ring.
“Take it back to the jeweler, get my money back, then take your ass back to Arizona.”
CHAPTER 44
Sandara
OMG! Containing my emotions was not happening.
Delvin parked his Bentley in front of my two-bedroom apartment in Little Five Points. Remy’s car was in front of his. She’d agreed to watch the kids at my place.
Standing in the doorway beside me, Remy squealed, then mumbled, “Damn, girl. You have my permission to stay out all night and until the sun comes up.”
The best thing Black had done for me was take me to court for child support.
Delvin exposed Black’s insecurities. Black wasn’t tough dealing with an intelligent, well-dressed, articulate man who didn’t view him as a threat.
There was no easy way to tell Remy I was moving soon as I found a place I liked in Buckhead. I wanted to be closer to Alexis and Domino, my mother, and my other two sisters. Maybe I could buy a house big enough for all of us and convince Remy to move in with us.
“Hi, Delvin,” I said, smiling inside out.
The black-and-white checkered fedora had a tiny red-and-white feather on the side. I loved the black buttoned up shirt with fine white pinstripes. Black skinny slacks revealed his well-endowed manhood. His spotless white shoes added character to his outfit.
Kissing my cheek first, he answered, “Hey, beautiful.”
Remy cleared her throat.
“Oh, come in. This is my girlfriend, Remy. She’s watching the kids.”
“Hey, handsome. You’d better take good care of my girl,” Remy said.
It was a first date, not a departure to a foreign country, I thought.
“Word is bond. She’s in great hands.” Delvin spoke with confidence.
Holding his hand, I escorted him to the living room. Before I could introduce Delvin, Ty sprang to her feet. “Daddy!”
Delvin’s brow
s formed a unibrow then raised toward the brim of his hat. He picked her up. “Hey, princess. I’m not your dad but I see where you get your gorgeous features.”
Ty’s face shined. “Thank you.”
Delvin nodded at me as if to suggest “job well done.”
Tyrell said, “He’s my daddy,” hugging Delvin’s leg.
“This is Ty, Tyrell, and that’s my eldest, Tyson. Say hi and bye to Mr. Delvin Brown,” I told them.
Tyson stared at the television. I didn’t make him respond. Doing so would’ve been more for me than him. He was sad that I’d told him Black wasn’t coming by. Truth was, I told Black what Delvin advised me. Black could see his son when he got a custody order from the court.
If Black could file for child support that he didn’t deserve, then he could legally request to spend time with his son. When he showed up at my place that night after court thinking he was going to fuck me, I called the police. Hadn’t seen or heard from him since.
Delvin handed Remy an envelope. “I’ll have her back at a decent hour.”
Remy and I frowned. She opened the envelope. “Take your time. Tomorrow is fine.”
Delvin laughed. “You ready, beautiful?” he asked, lowering Ty to the floor.
“Girl, I got these kids.” Remy’s two were on the sofa reading a book aloud to each other.
I was really going to miss being able to walk to my best friend’s house. “Thanks,” I said, then followed Delvin. He opened the door. Waited until I was in, then closed it.
Buckling up, I thought, I had to stop being afraid to embrace my success. “Where are we going?”
“I made a reservation at Chops. That’s cool?”
Nodding, I asked, “How old are you and what made you want to become a lawyer?”
“Twenty-nine. Guess you could say I went to law school by default. My dad, brother, and sister are attorneys. My father is good friends with Bing Sterling.”
“I like him,” I answered.
“He’s a stellar kind of guy. Straight shooter. Hard to find these days.”
“What about you?” I asked.
The One I've Waited For Page 22
