by Andy McNab
Davy had his back to us, his shoulders rolling as he anticipated his own story. His head moved to look at us both again and he pointed at the top pair of shoes. ‘You see these?’ We both nodded. He looked back to pull them out. I took the opportunity for a quick look at Baby-G. Fifty-five minutes to go until the press brief.
Davy turned round to walk back to us. ‘These are Bill’s personal bowling shoes,’ he said. ‘Look at the size of the things.’
They must have been something like size sixteen, at least. ‘He’s a big man all right.’ Hefting them in his hand, he chuckled. ‘You know the old saying, big feet, big . . .’ He suddenly checked himself in case Sarah didn’t approve. She was smiling.
The shoes were white with red stripes. As Davy reached us, he turned them round and showed us something. ‘See this?’ All smiles, he pointed to the back of the shoes. I saw that each had a little mark in black felt tip. ‘One day Bill came down with some of his bowling buddies. He went to get his shoes, and a couple of the advisors saw this written on the back.’ He pointed again. On one was the letter “L”, and on the other an “R”.
‘There they were, supposed to be discussing world affairs, and his aides were suddenly more worried about how he’d react to people writing on his shoes . . .
‘Well, Bill picked them up, and for a moment there was silence . . .’ I could tell old Davy Boy had told this story many, many times, because the pauses were in just the right places. ‘ . . . yep, there he was, the President of the United States, the most powerful man in the world, and someone had gotten a pen and done that to him!
‘Nobody was too sure how he was going to take it. Anyways, he looked down at the shoes, and then Bill started to laugh. “I’ll tell you what, boys, this is just what I need . . . they are so darned confusing, not being proper shoes and all.” ’
Davy started to laugh. I wasn’t sure if the story was funny or not, and nor was Sarah. I just took Davy’s lead and joined in. I could hear Sarah, standing slightly behind me, doing the same.
The laughter died down and Davy carried on, pleased with our reaction. ‘And that’s why it’s still there. Apparently Bill says it cuts his prep time by a half, so there’s more time to play.’
He was going to put the shoes back. He turned away and took two steps, and there was a thud.
Bill’s shoes fell out of Davy’s hands. There was no blood until he hit the floor, face forwards, and then it started to spurt from his head, dark and thick. I swung round.
Sarah was in a perfect firing position, standing at forty-five degrees to Davy, with her right pistol hand out straight, pushing the suppressed weapon at the target, her left hand cupped around both the pistol grip and the other hand, pulling back. She looked so relaxed she could have been on the range.
‘What the fuck are you doing?’ I shouted. What a bone question; I could see precisely what she was doing.
I didn’t know why, but I was half whispering, half shouting as she lowered the pistol. ‘For fuck’s sake, we agreed, no killing. What are you doing bringing that thing in? We don’t need it.’
She just stood there, in a different world, calmly putting the pistol back into her waistband.
This was out of control. No matter what happened now, we were in a world of shit and I had no idea by whose rules we were playing.
I started to move towards the door.
She looked at me quizzically. ‘Where are you going?’
‘I’m locking the door – what do you think I’m doing, letting everyone in? We’re in deep shit, Sarah. Do you have any idea what you’ve done? This won’t stop anything; it makes it worse.’
I reached the door and turned the lock inside the tumbler. It was pointless going over to Davy. There wasn’t a sound from him, and dark, deoxygenated blood seeped from his mouth.
I stayed where I was, shaking my head in disbelief. ‘It was under control, Sarah, for fuck’s sake. Midday – the press brief, remember? What the fuck are you doing?’
She started towards the door. I moved across her, putting my arms up to stop her. ‘Whoa, this is way out of control. It’s time to stop this, now, and get help. Just get thinking of a fucking good story.’
I pointed at Davy as I turned towards the door once more. Why had she done it? It took two seconds before it became obvious to me why. She’d stitched me up. ‘You fucking bitch!’ I started to turn back towards her.
At the same instant I felt pain explode in my stomach. The wind was knocked out of my lungs as I fell to my knees. I felt a fierce burning sensation on the left side of my gut.
The left side of my forehead hit the floor, then my nose. There were sparks flashing in my head. I tasted blood in my throat. I’d never taken a round before.
I couldn’t see Sarah. I was too busy curling into a foetal position as I tried to control the pain.
I started a low moaning noise that I couldn’t stop. I slowly, slowly rolled my head to find her. She was crouched over Davy. His ID was now around her neck; at a casual glance she would look part of the environment. Her loafers tiptoed around him, avoiding the blood, then took the pistol from his belt and the two mags from their carrier.
I didn’t want her to know that I was still alive. I lay as motionless as I could, eyes closed, trying to stifle my own moaning. It wasn’t working.
I sensed her standing over me. I opened my eyes. She was just too far away for me to reach her, even if I’d been able to.
She looked at her watch and then at me. The weapon came up and stopped in line with her eyes. For the first time in my life I thought of someone I would miss, and I decided that my last thought would be about Kelly. I looked at Sarah and waited. There was a delay, but no emotion, no explanation. Then she said, ‘You have a child now. I hope you live long enough to see her.’ She lowered the weapon, checking her watch again as she walked away.
The tumbler was turned and the door opened. I tried to shout, but it didn’t happen. The only sound that came out was a weak rasp. ‘Fuck you!’ Blood sprayed out of my mouth. She glanced down at me, no reaction in her eyes.
There was a pause as she checked outside, then the door closed quietly.
She was gone.
The pain was intensifying. I looked around frantically for a panic button or a phone, but I couldn’t see too well, things were getting hazy. Two others left to kill him? My arse; it had been her all along. How the fuck did I not see it?
Being curled up in a ball on the floor wasn’t going to do me or the VIPs any good. I needed to do something, even if it didn’t work. As I died, I would at least know that I’d tried to right my fuck-up.
My vision was starting to blur. I was taking short, sharp breaths, and my stomach muscles were tensing of their own accord. I moved my hand over a hole in my belly the size of a five-pence piece and plugged it with my thumb. At least I didn’t have to worry about an exit wound; I knew it was subsonic ammunition for the silenced Chinese thing. The round would still be kicking around inside me somewhere.
I dragged myself towards the door, through a pool of Davy’s blood, which had started to ooze across the lino, and I was just about to pull myself up to open it when it swung inwards and connected with my skull. Curled up again in pain as more sparks flashed up in my head, I was just about switched on enough to know that I was stopping the door from opening fully.
Encountering resistance, whoever it was got their body weight behind the door and pushed hard. I was shunted along the floor until they could get in.
It was Sarah again. She didn’t talk, just closed the door behind her. Then, grabbing hold of my feet and avoiding the blood, she started to drag me face down across the room, grunting with the effort.
I felt as if I had a magnesium incendiary burning in my stomach. I tried to keep tensed up, and all I could see was a dark trail of blood where my body had just been.
After four or five paces she dropped my feet on the floor. I moaned as I curled up, trying to reduce the pain as she aimed her pistol at the door.<
br />
It opened. Josh had good news. ‘Hey, guys, it looks like we’re going to—’
I tried to shout a warning, but nothing came. The expression on his face was of utter shock and disbelief, his eyes looking even wider behind his lenses. Sarah was in front of him in a perfect firing position, calmly pointing at his centre mass. People take a while for this kind of information to sink in, especially if they’re not expecting it, but Josh was catching on fast.
Sarah maintained her very cool, controlled voice. ‘Close the door, Josh.’
His eyes flicked between the two of us, took in Davy’s prostrate body, then mine, and finally settled on the pistol, no doubt trying to work out how the fuck she’d brought it in.
‘Close the door, Josh.’
If Josh was scared, he wasn’t showing it. He was taking in all the information; without saying a word, he did as he was told and then stood stock still, showing Sarah his hands.
She said, ‘You will now turn around and put your hands on your head.’
He knew the routine. If you’ve got your back to the person who’s pointing the pistol at you, you can’t assess what’s going on.
‘Move out of the blood, then down onto your knees.’
Once you’re on your knees, you’re very vulnerable.
She had more instructions. ‘With your left hand, using your thumb and forefinger, take your weapon out. Do it now.’
I was helpless, just a curled-up bundle of shit. I heard voices in the corridor. I recognized the loud Hispanic accents of the two white-shoed women, walking from the direction of the fire doors. Sarah quickly checked her watch again.
Should I call out? I didn’t have the strength. They wouldn’t hear me. I looked over at Josh, who I could see side-on. He was considering the same option.
He wasn’t flapping as he obeyed her, his finger and thumb on the pistol grip. ‘I’m taking it out now, Sarah.’
‘Good, Josh. Now put it on the floor behind you.’
Keeping his right hand on his head, he flicked the weapon behind him onto the lino. I could see the sweat coming down from his bald head onto his face and the wet patches in the armpits of his jacket as he raised his arm again. Fear is a good thing, there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s a natural reaction; you’ve just got to be able to control it. He’d been here before and knew what to do.
For a moment I had the strange feeling that I was in an audience, looking at actors on a stage. I knew exactly what would be going through Josh’s mind. He’d be wondering how he was going to get out of this, and just waiting for the chance to do something about it – anything.
Blood is the same as milk. Drop a carton on the floor and it looks as if three have been emptied. Davy’s blood had spread outwards and was mixing with mine around my face. I didn’t have the energy or inclination to move, I just spat from time to time to try and keep it from going in my mouth.
Sarah threw Josh’s weapon the length of the bowling alley and the clatter echoed around the walls. She checked her watch once more.
‘OK, Josh, this is what you will do. Are you listening?’
He nodded.
‘You will take me to the Diplomatic Reception Room. You will be my escort. Do you understand?’
He was very calm as he answered, ‘I can’t do that.’
Americans have this wonderful total conviction about themselves and their country. Even when they’re up to their necks in ten types of shit they have this unshakeable belief that everything will be all right, that America is behind them and the Seventh Cavalry will come over the hill at any moment. After being captured during the Gulf War, as opposed to asking for things, American prisoners would demand them – they just knew they were on the winning side. In the Regiment, you always knew that if you were in the shit you would never be left behind, and that was sometimes the only thing that helped you through, but the Americans believe that at a national level. I wished I had their confidence.
Sarah couldn’t quite believe what she’d heard. ‘What?’
Josh said simply, ‘I will not do that.’
There was a pause, and I watched Sarah’s face for a reaction. It wasn’t long coming. ‘Josh, you’ve got some thinking to do, and not a long time to do it in. Think about your children. This is no time to mess about with your family, Josh. Take me to that room or you will die. I’ve got nothing to lose, I’m going to be dead soon anyway.’ She had certainly listened to my brief on how to get Josh to do what she wanted. She checked her watch. If she needed to get to the Diplomatic Reception Room before the end of the coffee break, there wasn’t much time left.
‘They’re great kids, Josh, and they need you. You’re all they have left. Besides,’ she smiled her curious little smile, ‘you could even try to stop me. You can’t do that if you’re dead. I’m either going with you, or on my own, with you dead – in ten, Josh.’
I saw his chest rise and fall as his body took in more oxygen to suppress the shock it was experiencing. I could only guess what he was thinking: Do I die now? Or do I accept what she’s saying, and try to prevent it on the way? At least then I’m going to be alive for a little longer.
I had blood in my throat and my voice was hoarse as I said, ‘Take her, Josh. Just do it.’
He looked at me and our eyes locked. I could see for sure what he was thinking now: You fucking asshole. No matter if I had known what she was going to do or not, to him I was now the world’s biggest bastard. Fair one.
I looked up at Sarah as she gave the final warning. ‘It’s make-your-mind-up time.’ She didn’t have long until the coffee break ended.
He looked at the wall, thought for a few seconds more, and quietly said, ‘OK.’
‘If you try to fuck with me, Josh, know this: I will kill you before anyone has time to react. I don’t want your president. I just want the other two. But if you fuck with me . . . do you understand me?’
He closed his eyes and nodded. When he opened them again he fixed them on mine. I hoped my eyes were saying: I didn’t know this was going to happen, mate, and I’m sorry, so sorry.
But his expression told me it was a bit late for that.
Now that she was going to have an escort, Sarah took off Davy’s ID card and put her own one back on. That was detail, and detail counts.
She said, ‘Let’s go.’
She stepped back from the door as Josh walked towards it. ‘My weapon might be hidden, Josh, but at the slightest sign that you’re fucking with me I’ll ensure that I get you first.’
He nodded, looked back at me and walked out.
She followed without giving me a second glance.
28
Everything was out of focus; my head was spinning. I was losing too much blood. Between us, Davy and I had the lino pretty much covered. But now wasn’t the time to worry about that; I had to accept that I’d been shot, and get on with it.
I struggled onto my hands and knees, sucked in a couple of deep breaths and started to crawl over towards the abandoned ID card. Every movement was agony. With each bend of a knee or stretch of an arm I felt as if a red-hot saw was working on my stomach. It took me what felt like for ever to cover the ten or so feet. My head was swimming as I tried to pull the nylon loop over my head without disturbing the injury in my guts. When I’d finally finished, I couldn’t even remember why I’d done it.
I began crawling to the door, coughing, spitting lumps of blood, moaning to myself like a drunk in the gutter, my clothes, face and hair soaked with my blood and Davy’s.
On my knees, I fumbled with the handle like a panicking child. It was a normal knob, with the tumbler lock in the middle, but I couldn’t make my hands work. My fingers weren’t listening to my brain, or maybe it was just that they were too slippery with warm red fluid.
I knew what I was trying to do, but I couldn’t accomplish it. Maybe it’s true that your life can flash before you as you die. I was suddenly looking down a long tunnel, to when I was about six years old and fell through a glass roof in
to a garage. I’d been with a gang of older boys, running across the roof as an initiation test. I hit the ground, cut and bruised, and had to fight with the door bolt to escape. I was so scared that I couldn’t make any sense out of how to pull the fucking thing across, and once I’d gone through all that, there was no way I was going to show them how much it hurt. They let me join their gang.
My hands started to shake as they slithered around the door handle. I was losing it. I knew I was going to die soon. I didn’t care; I just didn’t want it to happen until I’d at least tried to stop Sarah.
I forced myself to calm down, take deep breaths and tell myself what I needed to do, just as I’d done back in that garage. It worked.
‘Help . . . help me . . .’ I tried to shout, but could only manage a weak splutter. Not surprisingly, nothing happened.
I couldn’t just lie there in the doorway and wait. Pressing myself against the frame I scrabbled and pushed myself upright and, head reeling, I half turned, half fell into the corridor. I bent over, leaning against the wall for support, my left hand clutching my stomach. Blood smeared along the white plaster as I stumbled towards Crisis Four.
She didn’t have far to go. If Josh fucked up and got zapped, she’d just have to follow those TV cables and she’d be there.
My only hope was to find TC. Anyone would be a start. I focused hard. There was no red light on outside Crisis Four. Shit. I started to look for a fire alarm, though at that moment I didn’t think I’d recognize one if it hit me in the face.
I felt my reserves of strength ebbing by the second as I swiped the ID card through the machine and tumbled through the door.
There was a picture on every screen, but they were moving in a slow spin, like a kaleidoscope. I started crawling again.
I didn’t know how I got to TC’s chair, let alone off the floor and into it. All I knew was that, as I tried with every ounce of whatever strength I had left to focus on the screens, I could see her.
Sarah and Josh had just come out of the kitchen area. The ERT guy hadn’t moved from the area of the brown screens and just turned towards them as they appeared.
