by JA Huss
The lions make one last attempt and gain a hold of my boot with claws and teeth and I slide back. But I'm done by then, I kick those fuckers in the teeth and they scream as they fall back into the darkness.
I scramble out of their reach and take a minute to calm down before looking around. It's only then that I realize I could have just pulled out the SEAR and killed them all. And I didn't. Lucan will be so proud.
"Junco!" I hear a voice from behind and get to my feet, limping on my bad ankle and huffing in the heavy gravity. It's Annun. I smile and wave. "You beat me!"
He waves back but he's not smiling. "That fucking sucked."
My smile falters and I swallow hard. "Yeah," I say more to myself than anyone. "It really did."
I take a good long look around. I'm standing on the top of a spire-like rock formation, as is Annun, and I assume, as would everyone else if there was anyone at the top with us. But there isn't. There are thin rope bridges connecting each spire and I make to cross over to Annun when I hear him shout, "Stop now!"
I recognize a command when I hear one, so I do stop. And look up at him.
He points over to a spire across the center circle and then I see the body lying at the bottom, limbs all splayed out at angles not seen on living things. A broken rope bridge hangs down either side of the two spires. The heavy G is too much for that little bridge.
I look back at Annun. "Shit. Thanks."
We only wait a few seconds before the others begin pulling their way out of the pits. Annun's buddies Merkar and Pike are out first. I watch with apprehension as one by one those who made it claw across the small flat area surrounding each pit opening. Kush comes up, and another kid I don't really know. His friend is next, and then Wyrd. I smile with relief. At least he will make it.
Another guy is there, then so is Tessen.
A few more materialize, and then we are at fourteen and I'm just about to give up on Isec when I see his head appear and then the rest of his little body follows him as he drops to his side in exhaustion.
I smile, but I don't call out, I just breathe hard, still not fully recovered from the challenge.
We all made it.
It's too good to be true and I catch myself wishing they hadn't, that it was over, and that the final deaths were all behind us.
But as I look around at each spire I don't see anyone who shares my sense of dread. They jump and call out and scream their happiness from the top of the world.
But I know better.
The top of the world is the worst place to be.
It just makes the fall back down to Earth all that much farther.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Ashur is taping my ankle up on my bunk while everyone else races around to get ready for the party. Lucan has sent a fleet of flyers and we are going to the 039 to celebrate.
I pleaded with the vision screen to mix me a cocktail for the pain, or start the self-healing stuff or something, but she is gone. And I don't really know how to run the equipment yet. So I suffer.
Two days and it will all be over.
"What are you thinking about, Junco?" Ashur is still taping but his eyes are on me.
I shake my head and exhale. "Just glad it's almost over. You know, Lucan said that these fights were not challenging for me, that he was never worried about me making it. But I have to disagree. Kush saved me the first fight and stopped the bleeding from my wings after the third fight. And believe it or not, it was Kadian's voice that snapped me out of the panic I was in in the pit. And I don't know if you saw on the screen, but Annun saved my life when he stopped me from crossing that rope bridge. There's no guarantee, Ashur. That's stupid of him to think that."
He smiles, a gentle smile, as he puts my foot down on the ground. "Stand up and try it out."
I do and it feels better, but I won't be wearing boots tonight. He takes my arm and guides me as I limp out of the dorm and out to the flyer. He loses his patience before we even reach the door and scoops me up to carry me the rest of the way.
We get to ride alone and I'm glad I don't have to share transport with all those excited people. He leans me back against the far door and puts my foot up on the seat, then settles on the opposite bench.
"What's wrong, Junco? You should be happy, your whole team came out of Fight Six. That's pretty amazing."
"I know, I am. But…"
He raises his eyebrows. "But what?"
I shake my head. "Nothing. I'm just really tired, that's all."
To my surprise he drops it and lets me doze on and off for the duration of the ride. The flyer lands on the roof of a very tall building overlooking Amelia proper. Ashur lifts me up and carries me down the landing pad stairs to a large terrace filled with green plants and flower beds and then through a large open door.
The guys are all there, even Braun, and they laugh and joke with me about my almost fatal ankle injury. Ashur sets me down on the couch as they all crowd me.
I look around at the apartment. It's what I might call ultra-minimalist on Earth, with sleek white floors and a sunken living room filled with white couches and loungers. The accents are chrome and it almost reminds me of my bedroom at home. From my vantage point on the couch I can see the terrace outside, as well as the lights of the buildings across the expansive boulevard.
Mish hands me a beer and Rikan throws a cigar in my lap. I strike it up and puff, then take a swig of the beer.
It feels awesome to be here with them.
Braun comes over and lifts me up into a bear hug and I choke and complain, but it feels so good I give in and throw my arms around his neck and plant a kiss on his cheek. He sets me back down on the couch and slides my legs over his lap and I fall back into the pillows and relax.
"Sorry I've been missing all the fun, Juncs. Lucan had me running all over the fucking worlds doing bullshit stuff. I think he was trying to keep us apart, you being my one true love and all."
Ryse interjects, "Braun, the only way Junco would love you is if the rest of us were all dead."
I smile up at Braun. "Not true, Braun."
"Shit," Rikan says, "She'd love Lucan before you!"
I laugh. "So not true, Braun."
He shrugs. "She says she loves me guys, I'm going with it!" He pulls me to his face and kisses me on the head. "I'll always be your favorite, right, Junco?"
"Always, Braun."
"Now, about that house you owe me, honey..."
I slap him and Ashur pulls him off of me and takes his place.
Isten yells from across the room, "Flyers upstairs."
The apartment bustles with activity as the other pledges pour into the party. Someone gets some kind of loud music going and the drinks begin to flow. Tessen makes her way over to Ash and me. "Junco, you can't mope on the couch all night. Get off her, Ashur." She physically pushes him aside and pulls me to my feet. "Let's mingle."
I laugh and look back at Ashur's stunned face as I limp away with Tessen. "Bye!"
We poke around all the rooms one at a time and discuss the quality of food from the autocook in the kitchen, the potential for large parties at the dining room table, the type of stone used for the tiles on the floor, and the wall art. Lucan appears from nowhere and scares the shit out of us as we peek into the various bedrooms.
"Junco, are you looking for your room?"
I stare up at him. "I have a room?"
"Of course you do, this is the 039. You live here."
Tessen nods and gives me the girlfriend look of approval.
"Come."
He takes my arm and helps me walk down a few stairs into the sunken living room, then across the other side and up a few more to a separate part of the apartment. I spot Ashur talking to Annun but he excuses himself and follows us as we walk into a small hallway that leads to another room.
When I walk in I'm a little bit taken back. It looks almost identical to my room at home, only much larger, and with an incredible bay window that almost bumps out into the traffic of flyers.
I look back and all the guys are peeking around the door to see what I think of it.
"Damn, Junco! Can I move in too, Lucan?" Tessen is clearly impressed.
I walk over to the piano and sit on the bench. "Where–"
"We looted your house, Junco. I hope you don't mind." Isten sits next to me and squeezes my arm. "Rikan and I took a bunch of shit while that fight was going down in your driveway."
My fingers touch the keys and I play the little lullaby I learned when I was just a toddler to try it out. It's even in tune. Isec wanders up and pulls on my arm. "Can you play it?"
"I actually play very well. Wanna hear?"
He nods and I push Isten off the bench so I can have room. "It might sound funny, I haven't played since my fingers were bitten off."
Nobody cares.
I play the first few lines of Asgarth's Genius from memory to test the left hand, but to my surprise, it sounds perfect. My fingers fly, picking out the sweet melody that made me fall in love with the piece in the first place, and then transition into the deeper notes that take it down to the dark place of Asgarth's nightmares. In the opera, Asgarth is an insane prince who thinks everyone is trying to kill him. It doesn't end well for the people around him.
I stop after I finish the first song and turn around. Everyone is silent and somber and then they clap gently and I smile and get up and bow.
Lucan is gone, but Ashur comes over and takes me to the book shelf to show me the photo albums they managed to get out of my room. "We got what we could." He looks away. "It probably makes you miss it even more, but–"
I smile and exhale. All the good parts are in the exhale. "It's very touching, Ash. Really."
People file past us after looking at the view and then we are alone and he sits me down on the window seat. I hear Tessen's loud laugh down the hallway and smile as I lean over and look down. The street is so far away and the boulevard so crowded with trains every twenty floors or so that there is no possible chance of getting a glimpse of it. I pull my legs up and hug them to my chest as I stare out the window. Ash goes over and turns the lights out. "It's beautiful at night."
I agree and lean back against the edge of the window frame. The lights outside really are stunning.
"Why are you so unhappy today?"
I shrug. "Because there's still one more fight and I'm getting hopeful that things will turn out OK." I look up at him and shake my head. "And things never turn out OK, so why bother enjoying it? It'll all be gone soon enough."
He sits next to me and takes my hand. "Not all of it, Junco."
I smile up at him. "I don't deserve you."
He leans in and kisses me, then stops to search my face for a reaction. His eyes glow green and I wonder what color mine are at the moment. I reach up to his cheek and stroke him with the tips of my fingers, then slide my hand around his neck and draw him in close to kiss him back. It lasts for so long I lose time.
I pull away and turn my head so he can take his kisses to my neck and then down my chest. His hands go to my waist and then he pulls back. "Fuck, Junco." His breath is heavy as he bows his head.
I nod and exhale as I play with his hair. "I know."
He pulls all the way back and sits up as I smile. I get up but he stays seated. "I'm gonna go find Lucan."
He nods. "I'll be out in a minute."
Chapter Thirty
Lucan is out on the terrace sitting on a porch swing that looks like they might have stolen it right out of the RR. I walk up next to him and he pats the seat so I sit down and pull my legs up into my chest. He makes the swing move back and forth and it reminds me of the lullaby I played on the piano.
"You look like I feel, Lucan."
He smiles and pats my arm like I'm four. "Yes, you and I feel it more so than the others, Junco. The end is getting closer now."
"Will I really hate you?"
He raises his eyebrows. "Perhaps not. I can't say without knowing what you feel for me now."
"I think you've been pretty wonderful to me, to be honest."
"I'm not sure wonderful will cover it."
"Are you going to kill me?"
He laughs. "Oh, Junco, I hope that was a joke."
I feel my face go red. "OK. It was."
He looks over at me and shakes his head. "Never, Junco. I would never do that."
"Will you let Tier die?"
I watch his face drop as I feel his heart skip a beat. "Believe it or not, that is not even in my control. I have no say at all. I used up all my gifts on Tier, there are none left for him."
I avoid his gaze as he looks over to me. "What's that mean?"
"It means that I've given him every advantage, illegal and otherwise, since the day he was born. There are limits as to how I distribute gifts and well, I have run out in his case. I've used them up. So, I am rather helpless to help the closest thing I will ever have to a son."
I stare at his mouth, trying to understand the words. "Tier is your son?"
"In an avian sort of way. I didn't make him, but I was there – for some reason I cannot even remember at this time – when he was pulled out of the womb. And I chose him. I poured it all into Tier."
"Why?"
"I cannot even say for certain, only that I felt compelled. I even named him. It doesn't really fit him though, that name. He's so much more than a predator."
I put my head down on my knees and we are quiet for a while. "I lied, Lucan. In the testimony. That AI is not inert, Layla was wrong. She told me what to do when I was under the drugs."
He looks over to me, sad. "I know, Junco."
"And I was praying to the Fallen Archer up in that Fledge Church, and she asked me if I wanted to make the sacrifice, and I said yes."
He nods again. "Yes, I saw some of that as well."
"Saw it how?"
He taps his head. "In my brain, one of my special talents."
"Oh, you know, Isec says he's a precog."
"Is he? Isn't life cruel? He needs to be a telepath to live, yet his genetics give him precognition, which does him absolutely no good because he must be a true-blood Aves to control it."
"Yeah, life is a total bitch." We swing in silence for a few seconds. "What's the High Order?"
I look up and watch his face crinkle. "Who told you about them?"
"No one, but Ash mentioned it when he was telling me about the Fallen Archer myth. He said he wasn't allowed to talk to me about them. I had to ask you."
His eyes sweep over to mine. "Everyone has a boss, Junco. Even me."
"That's it?"
He laughs. "That's it for now. Do you want me to tell you what to do with the AI?"
"Can I do anything? Or am I just stuck with it?"
He takes a moment to think. "Yes, you can make choices, but only you can decide which one is best. I can tell you to ignore her, take her advice, or refuse to do so. But in the end it doesn't matter. I do not think she can make fate shift."
"Well, shit. It sucks to be us, right? But oh fucking well. That's who we are. So, I guess the only thing left to do is finish it off, Lucan. When we get to the end, we'll revisit all this and see where we stand."
He smiles. "You can stay here tonight if you want. Sleep in your new room."
I take in a sharp breath. "I better not. No offense, but I should probably go home with everyone else until I can think a few things through."
"Would you like a bit of advice?"
"Absolutely," I say, looking up at him.
"Take your time, Junco. Think about what you really want. Last week you could not picture yourself living here and being happy, yet today I think you'll agree that has changed."
"Yeah, you're right."
"Ashur is a very good man."
I look up into his eyes to see if they are judging me. But they're not, they are kind and sad. "I know, Lucan."
He changes the subject so fast I almost feel dizzy. "Your piano playing was impeccable, even with missing fingers. Do you find that
odd?"
I look down at my left hand. "Yes. It's funny, ya know, when it happened Tier took me back to the cavern and I woke up later all freaked out about it. But right before I passed out again he said, You'll never miss them, Junco. I promise you, you'll never even know they're gone."
I smile and look up at Lucan. "And he was right. I never think about them. Ever. And I never miss them when I'm doing anything, not even when I'm climbing a wall or fighting or playing piano. It has no effect on me."
Lucan stands up and takes my hand. "Take the day off tomorrow, no training for anyone. Just do something fun."
I nod and he lets go of my hand and disappears.
I avoid Ashur for the rest of the night, but I watch him from across the room as he talks to Annun or one of the other pledges that he must think of as worthy. I sit at the table and play poker with the guys and let Braun distract me with his jokes filled with sexual innuendo.
At the end of the night I slouch against Tessen in the flyer on the way home and begin the process of making choices.
I can't sleep. Everything is somehow off balance and my mind refuses to let any of it go. I want to be with Ashur and forget everything else. Forget Tier and the last battle, and the Seven Siblings, and the myths.
I swing my feet out and walk over to the mast and before I can even think about what I'm doing, my wings are carrying me up to her. I land hard outside the huge wooden door after a dozen or more minutes of frantic flying and then go inside. The vestibule smells sweet with some kind of incense, which means other pledges have been in here recently. It makes me feel better that I'm not the only one drawn to her and her questions.
I pull open the second door, half expecting someone else to be inside, but it's empty. I walk up to the altar and stand in front of the offering. My eyes begin at the feet and trace down every inch of her writhing and twisting body until I get to her throat. I kneel down and sit back on my butt as I look at her half-outstretched wings. One falls to the side, bent at the elbow, the tip stretching outward. The other looks as if it is desperately trying to stay tucked up next to her back, but if the moment were released, it too would drop out.
