“I’m still trying to get this last column to balance. I’ll be there in a minute.” I hear him say from down the hall.
That’s weird; he has never turned me down before. Come to think of it, he would never have let me shower alone either! Something is definitely bothering him today. He has been off since I got back from my ride. Hmmm. Hope all is ok with the ranch books.
Knowing he won’t be joining me, I get dressed and ready to go to town.
***
Karlie has to know something is wrong. On a normal day I would never let her shower alone or turn her down to make love to her especially in the middle of a Saturday. I just can’t get Tracey’s words out of my head. And I can’t stop wondering how in the world do I break the news to my fiancé? Heck when it’s born she will be my wife. If she still wants to marry me after I do tell her. I think that’s what I am most worried about.
I hear Karlie coming down the hall so I close down my computer and follow her to the front door. We are going to pick out flowers and the location for the wedding and here I am not sure if there even will be one. It will crush me if she does cancel it.
“Ready? Austin is meeting us there in 30 minutes. Mom is already there with Reverend Lowell.” She says smiling that excited smile. She is so excited about the wedding, how can I destroy all that with the news that will break her heart? What choice do I have though? This is a small town, she will find out regardless.
***
“Mom, this will be perfect. Don’t you think baby?” I say hugging Mom and then Aiden. “The cream colored assortment of flowers will be my first choice Austin. Thanks for coming over here to meet us. I’m sure you were busy at the nursery. We really appreciate it.”
“Yes, thanks Austin. Jack left the best person in charge. You picked great stuff.” Aiden says not really sounding excited as he was earlier today. The tux decision must have been his last one. That’s ok. With Audrey, Amelia, Mom and I, we are sure to get it all done in perfect time. No problem.
I walk over to Aiden and wrap my arms around his waist and lay my head on his chest. I hear his heart beating strong and I feel more happy and content than I have ever felt. But I can’t help but wonder what is up with him and his mood.
“What happened while I was out riding? The ranch books ok?” I feel him breathe in deep and let out a big sigh. “Aiden?”
“Nothing baby. Just ranch stuff. I don’t mean to put a damper on the wedding details; I just have a lot on my mind.” He says and kisses the top of my head.
Stepping out of his arms and raising on my tip toes to kiss his lips, I lightly say, “Ok, if you say so. I need to run to Mom’s store and see if I can find the wedding cake books so we can finalize the design tonight too. I will get a ride back with Audrey. Love you.”
Walking away I feel as if he isn’t telling me something but I have more to worry about than what Aiden’s embarrassed to tell me about ranch finances. Mom’s paying for the wedding so, it doesn’t directly relate to me.
“Hey Audrey. Can you drop me off at the AK on your way home? Aiden had a lot going on at the ranch so he left me at Moms.” I call her and ask. Luckily I knew she was at the school in her classroom this afternoon working on lesson plans.
I walk to Mom’s store and just before I walk into it I get a text.
Love you.
From Aiden. I type a quick reply and hit send and receive another right away.
Promise?
What does that mean? What a weirdo. I text back.
Always. You?
Knowing what his answer will be I search for books and when I find them I head back to Moms. As I lock up the store, my phone chimes again.
No doubt.
Ok maybe he is just stressed out with the ranch today. Before I get a block away from the store I see Tracey drive by slowly and wave like she’s my best friend. I smile and wave back hesitantly. Now that was bizarre. I haven’t really seen or talked to her since we got back from LA. Weird. Everyone is acting strange today. Something in the air?
***
After about an hour of looking at the wedding cake books with Mom, I hear Audrey call out from the front door. I yell back and tell Mom I have to go. Give her a kiss on the cheek and carry the books and my purse to meet Audrey at her car.
“Hey. Thanks for the ride. Aiden was so distracted earlier. We did decide on flowers with Austin and to for sure have the wedding and reception in Mom’s back yard.”
She smiles a hesitant smile and says, “I’m sure it will be magical.”
Now Audrey is taking the crazy train ride too. She is usually going non-stop with wedding details.
“The strangest thing happened today when I was walking back from the store to Moms. I saw Tracey drive by slowly and waved like a crazy person. So strange.” I say knowing Audrey and Tracey were close. If something was wrong, she would know.
“That is strange. She didn’t say anything? Just waved?” she asks without taking her eyes off the road.
“No. Just waved. I waved and smiled or at least tried to but it was just eerie.” I say with a big sigh thinking I need to just relax because I am getting paranoid and sounding like I am the one on the crazy train ride.
Once we pull up in front of my house at the AK, I look over at Audrey and say, “Thanks for the ride. Talk soon.”
She pulls away a little faster than normal and I am left standing in my driveway shaking my head. Seriously, what is up with everyone today?
***
After texting Karlie I feel even worse than before. I am keeping something so monumental from her and don’t know what to do. Well, I know what to do. I need to tell her, but I can’t make those words come out of my mouth.
Just then my phone rings, “Hi Audrey. What’s up? SHE WHAT? Did she say anything to her? I know I just don’t know what to say. She was so pumped for wedding stuff. How in one breath do I tell her yes I love the white flowers versus the pink then the next tell her another woman is pregnant with my first child? I know Audrey, I will soon. Thanks. Night.”
“You will what?” I hear Karlie come into the kitchen and say. Oh goodness how much did she just hear?
“I will ask Austin to be my best man.” I lie and reach for her wrapping my arms around her knowing this could be one of the last times I get to do this.
“I think I am going to ask Audrey to be my maid of honor. What do you think?” she asks.
“Great. She’s acting more like the wedding planner than maid of honor anyway.” I say with a smile at the thought of my little sister bossing everyone around.
“She’s been such a big help. I couldn’t be pulling off this wedding in three months without her. And our mothers, of course.” She says and gives me a saucy look and pulls me towards the bedroom. This time I definitely won’t be turning her down. The news will have to come later.
After I tell her the news, she may not want to be this close to me again. I hope she doesn’t pick up on my desperation. I can’t imagine going back to not being able to kiss, touch or make love to her whenever I feel like it. But it seems inevitable.
16
A couple days later I am in my studio for some appointments I have and find Tracey walking in the front door instead of my client. She is holding her stomach like she is ill. If she’s ill why is she in here? I don’t want to get sick. Seeing her twice in one week is two too many. What is she doing here? I don’t hate her; it’s just too weird being around her.
“Hello. What can I do for you?” I ask politely.
“Don’t we need to talk about it? I thought I would have heard from you by now.” She says with more attitude than necessary. That has never been the way she has acted before. But what is she talking about anyway? I have nothing to talk to her about. She is acting so strange.
“Talk about what? Why would I call you?” I say starting to feel uncomfortable. I look at my watch to check the time hoping it was time for my next client to arrive, but no luck. Still have a few minutes.
“He di
dn’t tell you did he? He told Audrey but not his beloved Karlie?” she spits out and steps a bit closer as if ready to do battle.
“Just get it out Tracey, what do you want? I have clients coming any minute and don’t have time for your games.” I say tiring of this nonsense. As I say that the front door rips open and Aiden rushes in clearly mad at someone. And on the war path.
***
“Aiden, I just talked to Tracey and she said she was going to KAB to talk to Karlie. She doesn’t know you haven’t told her yet. You better hurry up and diffuse the situation before world war three starts in the middle of that studio.” I hear Audrey say on the other side of the phone call. I hang up quickly in full panic, jump in my pickup and race into town praying I can catch Tracey before she says anything to Karlie. Darn it! Why haven’t I just manned up and told her already? I was afraid this was going to happen.
If Tracey tells Karlie first, I’m a dead man. I have to get there before so I can tell her myself. Tracey won’t use any tenderness at all and Karlie is going to be so upset.
Finally pulling up in front of KAB, I see that Tracey is here. Oh crap! I race up the steps and rip open the door. The women are standing in the middle of the room looking as if they are ready to go a few rounds.
Karlie looks at me with so much confusion I can tell that Tracey wasn’t able to say anything yet. I couldn’t be any luckier than that.
“Tracey, can I have a few minutes alone with Karlie, please?” I ask pleading with the woman I used to think I loved.
“Sure, why not? I have a doctor’s appointment in a few minutes anyway so I will come by later.” She says with a smile and walks out the door. I know what doctor she is seeing but I feel nothing about not being with her for it. Right now, Karlie is my first priority.
“What is going on here Aiden?” Karlie asks as she still stands there looking confused. “She was acting so strange.”
“Baby, you need to sit down. I need to tell you something.” I say grabbing her hands and sitting in front of her. “You aren’t going to like what I have to say.”
“Aiden, please don’t tell me she is pregnant!” she screams and pulls away from me as she puts all the pieces to the puzzle together. Smart was always something Karlie was.
“Baby, I just found out a couple of days ago. I have been trying to find the right time and the right way to tell you.” I stand and walk to the window running my hands through my hair.
“A couple of days? You have been keeping something like this from me all this time? How could you Aiden? This affects my life too! I can’t believe this! Now it all seems clear. The way you have been acting. Audrey all weird. Tracey. Oh my gosh. This can’t be happening. How can this be happening Aiden?” she says and begins to cry but steps back as I try to step towards her. She holds up her hand to gesture me to stop.
“She says she just found out earlier this week. I am so sorry Karlie. Please tell me what to say.” I plead with the love of my life as I feel her slipping away from me.
“Don’t know what to say? You slept with her and she got pregnant Aiden. Not much you can say! How far along is she? We have been together almost two months. Have you been sleeping with her since we got back? How would you feel if I told you I was pregnant with Jeremy’s baby right now? Yes, just like that.” she squeaks out and puts her hand over her mouth.
“No Karlie! I would never do that. I love you more than anything! It has to be from before we broke up. I was always so careful with her. For over three years. Oh Karlie, please tell me you understand this isn’t something I wanted.” I say and wipe tears from my eyes as well as see Karlie wiping more than a few from hers.
“Please leave Aiden. You should be at that doctor’s appointment anyway. You are the father.” With that she lets a slight sob escape and turns to run to the back room of the studio leaving me standing here frozen. Again feeling as if my life were a nightmare.
***
“Audrey, I got there right before Tracey said anything. Yes, I told her. How do you think it went? She told me to leave. No. She doesn’t want to see me. Yes, she is mad I didn’t tell her then. I know. I know. I really messed up. How is this happening?” I say into the phone and wish I could just wake up a few days ago and find this has never happened.
I get into my pickup and head to the hospital. Karlie is right; I should at least be there for the baby. I drive over to the side that is the clinic but don’t see Tracey’s car so I dial her number.
“Tracey, I am here at the clinic and I don’t see your car. Where are you parked?”
“Oh I already went in and am back home. They just wanted to do the blood test to be sure before anything else was done. I am too early in the pregnancy to need much else. My next one is next month.” I hear her say and wonder what the heck she is talking about. I don’t know much about babies but I do know that she has to be over three months along and a doctor has to want to do more right? Hmmm. I need to ask Mom.
Mom. Oh my. That’s another person I have to tell. Lightning strike me now.
I hang up my phone and head to the 6AB so I can break the not so wonderful news to my parents. I hope they take it a little better than Karlie did. But how did I expect her to take it? We are getting married in less than a month and now I am an expectant father. With another woman.
I take a deep breath and walk into the kitchen where Mom and Dad are with Audrey and Austin. The whole gang’s here and I get to tell them news that will alter everything. Oh boy.
Everyone looks my way as I walk into the room. From the looks on their faces I can tell that Audrey has already broke the news to them. Not sure if I am relieved or mad. Mom walks over and hugs me tight. Well, she isn’t too mad if she wants to hug me. The rest of them follow and I feel as if my dog just died.
“So, Audrey spilled the beans I take it?” I ask trying to add a bit of humor but it falls flat. This is too serious for humor.
“Aiden, how could you not tell us? And Karlie? Son, what is going to happen now?” Mom asks while stopping to stand next to my Dad.
“I was trying to process and find the right way and time to tell Karlie. She had to know first. I’m sorry you didn’t find out earlier. Very sorry. I just don’t know what to do here. I never in a million years thought this would ever happen to me. And now Karlie wants nothing to do with me right now.” I finally break down with what seems like the weight of the world on my heart.
***
How can this be happening? Aiden and Tracey are going to have a baby. Not he and I. I always dreamed of being the one to hand him his first born child. After we were married. Not before and with someone else having that honor. Sitting down on the sofa in KAB I start to feel like I can breathe a little better. I have got to get out of here. I can’t go home. I can see if Mom is in the store or at home. Mom will know to comfort me. I have to tell her first. If I tell Mom it will be real.
“Mom, I need to talk to you. It’s very important. Can you meet me at home? Good. Heading there now.” I say into my cell phone and lock up the studio. I climb into my SUV and somehow drive myself the few blocks to where Mom’s house is. I don’t really remember driving there just like the day Dad died. I feel about the same as I did then. Except it was Aiden who hurt me this time and not the one to comfort me.
“Hi honey. What’s going on? Have you been crying?” Mom asks and hugs me tightly. At that exact Moment my thoughts and emotions collide and I can’t stand on my own. Mom lets me fall to the floor but never letting go of me. We sit on the floor in the hallway for a few minutes before she asks again. “What’s going on Karlie? You are scaring me!”
I take a deep breath and look up at her. “Aiden is going to be a father. With Tracey.” That makes me sob all over again but I hear Mom’s gasp and feel her pull me tighter into the embrace. If only Mom’s arms could make the hurt and the outside world go away.
“When did you find this out? You two have been together for months Karlie. How can this be?” she says with matching confusion. �
�Karlie, what are you going to do?”
I don’t have a clue as of how to answer that. I only wished I knew what I was supposed to do or what I could be able to handle doing. I do know I don’t want to deal with this. I just can’t do this. I am supposed to be planning my wedding. Not figuring out how to deal with another person being a part of my marriage. Another two people.
“I need to be alone Mom. I’ll be in my room.” I say and escape to my old bedroom. It is even emptier this time after moving all of my stuff into the AK after LA. I sit down on my bed and feel my head swirling with all of this so I lay back. Looking up at the ceiling like I did so many nights as a child and teenager, I have never felt more at a loss. More empty inside.
***
“Karlie, are you sure this is what you should be doing? You haven’t even talked to Aiden for a couple of days and you are just going to run away again? I’m not so sure about this.” Mom says to me a couple mornings later as I am packing the little bit of clothes that Mom and Audrey got for me from the AK. I called Gerry last night and he has an opportunity for me in Miami to do a cover photo shoot. I told him I was taking it and would be down there today. I know Mom isn’t happy but after spending a few days cooped up in my old bedroom, I need to get away from here and think.
“I will only be gone a week and a half Mom. I will be able to think a lot more clearly away from here. That bedroom of mine here feels as if the walls are closing in on me. I will stay with Savannah and get to spend time with her and the kids too. It will be much better than moping around here.” I say trying very hard to sound optimistic even though that is the last thing that I am feeling.
Sleeping and waking up alone has been horrible and I severely miss Aiden, I just don’t know what to say to him or what to feel. I don’t know how to accept that another woman is going to be having a separate part of his life and attention. I know that sounds selfish but how can I not feel that way right now? I keep waiting for him to call me or come by but he hasn’t so that must mean he is busy trying to deal with her and the baby. That will only get worse the farther along she gets and much worse after the baby is born. Their baby. Ahhhhhh.
Down to the Creek- Book 1 of the Colvin Series Page 11
