Hockey had been a calling more than anything else had, and I’d devalued that because I was too insensitive to see that his heart was broken.
No wonder he ended up hating me.
Well, there’s no sense sitting here feeling sorry for myself. So I made a few mistakes, too. Learn and do better, Nic.
With that bolstering thought in mind, I turn to Minnie, and taking a deep breath, I really listen this time.
Turns out that all James men know that they will have only one love and that when they find that love that’s it. Game over. Well, all James men know—except Law—and at this point, I think it’ll take a hammer to the skull to fix the idiot.
Chapter Twenty-eight
Law
I’m going crazy, and the worst part is that I don’t quite know how to fix it or stop myself from falling into this madness. I’m officially obsessed with Nic Sharp, and I can’t say how or why it happened, that the love I only just allowed myself to feel went from simmering to a full-blown obsession that’s turning me into a lunatic.
Really, I’m going nuts.
I think about her all the time, wondering what she’s doing, if she’s happy, comfortable. Hell, I wonder if she’s thinking about me, and then I get pissed because the answer is probably no, and I can’t handle the thought of not being an obsession for her the way she is for me.
And then I want to punish her and…how crazy is that? Wanting to hurt her for something she hasn’t even done, something that’s just in my mind.
When I’m not pissed, I am fixated on the thought of getting my dick back in her and planting a baby deep in her womb. Most of my day is spent in meetings that I don’t hear half of because I think about her so constantly.
I hate it. I need her to be okay now because I need to distance myself, and the only way I know how to do that is by using sex against her. Sex is easy, a way to take what I want and still keep myself separate from everything. It is something that I now have to do since it seems my mind has taken a walk and left behind a possessive, crazed beast, who would chain Nic to me all fucking day if it could.
And therein lays some of my rub. I want her with me, but I have a job to do. I will take James and turn it into a bigger, better version of what Dad and Nic envisioned because I need to prove to them that—while it’s not the life I wanted—I am more than capable of being great.
I want her to see me and know that I am all-man, all-dominant, and worth her time. To do that, I need to keep my fucking head in the game and out of her pants.
Oh, and I still have a son to start grooming.
So, yeah, my plate is hella full right now, but all I can seem to do is sit around and moon about the damn woman. I don’t know what’s happening to me, but it scares the shit out of me…this need I have for her…and I don’t like it. Not one bit.
“Peggy! Get my dad on the line and bring me a cup of coffee!”
Okay, so I’m being a total dick today, but it’s taking everything in me to stay at work and not run home to fuck my fiancée like some green little twerp who has had his first taste of sex and is addicted.
“Law.”
I shoot a glare at the phone as Dad’s voice comes over the line and keep silent till Peggy has my coffee on my desk and is scuttling for safety.
“Close the goddamned door!”
“Yes, sir. Sorry, sir,” she squeaks, closing the door with a resounding thud.
“Is that any way to talk to a woman who has been part of the company for almost twenty years?” Dad growls, reminding me that I’m not alone.
I sigh and grab up the cradle, balancing it between my shoulder and ear, as I grab the coffee and swing my seat around to look out at the skyline.
“I’m having a bad day, old man. Give me a fucking break!” I growl, clenching my teeth at his chuckle.
“I remember those first days after I married your mom and got her under my thumb. Felt like I lost a limb every time I left her for work, just to prove to myself that I didn’t need to be around her every minute of every day. That shit…it’s a thing with us James men. We love once, and we love hard.”
“Uh no. I don’t do that kind of love, Dad—and we both know it. Nic and I are getting married this weekend thanks to Mom arranging the wedding as a surprise, and we’re going to settle down and do what needs doing. This marriage is only for Cody and to continue my line.”
I hear another chuckle and force myself not to respond, choosing to sip at my coffee as denials run through my head only to be swept away by my father and his nosiness.
“You keep telling yourself that, boy. Whatever it takes to keep that manly James pride. But don’t come running to me when your shit backfires on you. I love you, but that girl is the mother of my grandchild and my daughter besides. Try not to hurt her.”
And here comes the jealous resentment again. I know that blaming Nic for my parents’ loyalty isn’t fair, but I despise that she means more to them than I do.
Seems nothing has changed on that score. They took Nic’s side ten years ago and almost disowned me for my behavior, and I get the feeling that they won’t tolerate me hurting her again.
“Thanks for the vote of confidence, old man.”
“Law, let me be straight with you—and just hear me out before you get all hot under the collar, okay. I love you. You’re my son, and there is nothing in this world I wouldn’t do for you. I let you go when you lost your hockey career and ran away to lick your wounds. I’ve kept silent as you fucked your way across Europe and spent almost all of your trust fund on booze, sex, and gambling. Your mother and I have always tried to give you time and space to come to terms with everything and live your life before you needed to settle down.”
I sense a “but” coming and finish off my coffee with a growl as the hot liquid scalds my throat.
“But…you’re better than the man you’ve become, and we both know it. If you can’t find it within yourself to be the right man for Nicolette—”
“Butt out of my love life, Dad. Nic is mine, and she always has been. Whether or not I can forgive her for her treachery and get that happy ending you and Mom are so intent on, is none of your damned business. Now if you’ll excuse me.”
“Wait! We haven’t talked about the family—”
I end the call, knowing that I’m heading for trouble with my whole family and not caring a wit about it right now.
Not only am I nowhere near resolving the obsession that is steadily growing for my fiancée, but I’ve also got to contend with the fact that my own parents are standing in her corner, just waiting for me to make a wrong move.
The pressure is piling up and pushing at me from all directions, and I have the overwhelming urge to run and not look back. Ever. I can do it. Contrary to my father’s opinion of me and his assumption that I blew through my trust fund, I am rich in my own right, thanks to investments and some business in the past.
So yeah, running will not be a problem for me. But it’s definitely something I can’t do if I want to prove to them that I’m more than a reckless playboy with a silver spoon shoved up his ass.
Hence the pressure and this overwhelming need to fuck with Nic as much as she’s been fucking with my head since the day I laid eyes on her again.
Goddamned woman!
“Mr. James?”
I grit my teeth against the guilt and the need to apologize, as Peggy’s stammering voice whispers over my intercom.
“Yes, Peggy?”
“Er, Miss Sharp is on line one for you, sir.”
“Tell her I’m unavailable Peg and hold all calls for the rest of the day, please.”
Why am I doing this? Simple. Nic needs to know that I am not available to her at the drop of a hat, and that no matter what happens henceforth, I am and will always be in control of our lives from here on out.
I tell her what to eat. What to wear. How late she may rise in the morning. If she sees that as my way of caring for her all the better, but the truth is that I’m slowly but surel
y taking over her life so that by the time I have my ring on her finger and my seed in her belly she won’t be capable of forming a thought without my permission.
That’s the only way I can think of to control this beast prowling beneath my skin, and I will do whatever I need to in order to regain control of myself. Where’s the happy, easy-going playboy who only thought about the simplest of pleasures in life?
I want that guy back so that I can save myself, and I’ll get him back.
Starting with my next plan.
A half hour later I’m in the car and driving towards my destination, feeling some of the tension ease the closer the car gets.
I’m taking control of my family.
Chapter Twenty-nine
Nico
The feel of warm hands skating over my ass brings me awake with a jolt, and I smile into the pillow, relaxing into the feel of Law pushing up my nightgown to reveal my nakedness underneath. I forewent panties this time because after the doctor cleared me, I assumed he’d be home like a shot and sexing me up good. After waiting till almost ten o’clock, I must have fallen asleep, wrapped up in disappointment and not a little anger at the fact that the man has been ignoring me but for the commands he seems to bark at me whenever we’re alone.
The only people he seems to give a shit about are his parents and Cody…who he dotes on so much. I was surprised to hear that he attended a hockey practice.
Me? Nada. I wake up with instructions placed on the pillow beside my head telling me when I can get up, what to use in the shower, what to wear, and what to eat throughout the day.
Don’t get me wrong, the man does not starve me. On the contrary, he seems to include a lot of food that—if not fattening—is definitely going to put some weight back on thanks to the quantities he deems appropriate.
At first I was charmed, thinking that this is Law’s way of showing me that he loves me or at least cares for me. Imagine my surprise when I realized he’s just being a controlling douche.
I thought about it a lot over the last two days since he’s been ignoring my calls and avoiding me, working so late that half the time I don’t see him unless I wake up to pee in the middle of the night.
My conclusions are so against my feminist core that I laughed about it for a good thirty minutes…before I cried a little and then ate a whole tub of double chocolate fudge ice cream.
I’m going to let it slide and just go with the flow. If he needs to do this to make himself feel better about whatever the heck is going on in his brain, that’s fine by me, as long as it gets us where we need to be.
On the same page.
Back to the hands though….
“Law?” I mumble, gasping when one of his hands slips down the crack of my ass and zeroes in on my vagina with a rough glide that leaves me trembling.
“Who else?” he purrs, spreading my legs to get better access to my core and the heated syrup now coating my lips.
As his fingers start playing, I stretch and push my face into the pillow, muffling the moans that always come with his touch.
“Don’t hide, Nic. Let me hear your screams, babe.”
I shake my head and burrow deeper even as I lift my hips and spread my legs, my knees coming up beside me as he parts my sex and thrusts two fingers home…so deep I contract with joy.
His touch—as he moves his hand and cups my sex from the front even as the fingers of his other hand keep thrusting—is hard and purposeful, letting me know that the gentle though dirty lover of before is long gone.
This Law is aiming to show me who is boss, and God have mercy, I don’t have the strength to fight him—not when the dominant thrust and the skilled pinch of his fingers against my clit are so perfect.
“Law.”
My voice is a gasp when he settles over my back and bites into the skin at my nape, his teeth only gentle enough to let me know he’s in charge. The move is so hot I feel my sex pulse around his fingers, and it’s all I can do not to beg him to touch me harder, deeper, to take me and make me his.
I want him in me, filling me, branding me so deeply that not only will I know that I am his, but so will he.
“That’s it, babe. You feel me hitting that spot? That’s where I’m putting my dick. I’m going to fill you so full you’ll feel me there all the time. You’ll remember everything I can do to you and crave the feel of my seed filling your sweet womb.”
My arousal is so high at this point that just one tiny movement from either hand could set me off. He seems to sense this though and stops moving all together.
I want to curse when he burrows into my neck, and I feel his smile against my skin. “No coming yet, Nic,” he says with a purr, sending chills down my spine as his raspy breath meets my ear. “You only come when I say, and I don’t want you coming till you feel me offload into you.”
I feel his shift and cry out when he pushes home with a grunt, seating himself so deeply inside me I feel an edge of pain as he bumps up against my cervix. At this angle, he’s filling every inch of my tight heat to the point of pain, a good pain that only serves to ramp up my arousal and threatens to have me climaxing harder and faster than I have ever come in my life.
“Laaaaw!”
“That’s it, babe. Feel how deep my dick is, Nic? This is mine. I belong in you.”
Another shiver wracks me, and I push back, wanting him deeper even though there’s nowhere to go. He’s bottomed out and so in that I feel his balls hit my clit with every small thrust he makes as he grinds into me.
The friction, or lack thereof is maddening, and I grunt, reaching down to get to my clit. I know he said I can’t come yet, but I need to and I can’t—
“Nahahah, Nic. Bad girl, babe.” He grabs my hands and pins them above us. “This is my show, and I run it.”
He starts thrusting then, hard, and I can do nothing but lie beneath him and accept what he has to give me. The need to let go is riding me hard, but I somehow manage to hold off, letting him take control, letting him know that I’m with him every step of the way.
The feeling is heady, and I wonder how I ever lived without this for so long. I’m no submissive in any real aspect of life, and I’m not about to walk that path, but I am so turned on by his aggression that I feel at peace even as my orgasm builds and threatens to erupt despite my efforts to stop it.
“I can feel your sex pulsing, babe. You need to come, Nic?”
“Yes,” I say, my voice strangled and breathless. The harder he fucks into me, the more it sends my face into the pillows with every hammer of his strong hips.
“Good. I want you wild and begging before I let you take what you need.”
“Oh God! Please!” I beg, fighting against myself even as the first warning ripple tingles low in my belly, signaling my impending orgasm.
Another few hard thrusts later and I feel him ram so deep that I swear I feel him in my womb, before stiffening and releasing a stream of scalding hot seed.
Just like that my control snaps and I come, screaming into the pillow as contractions overtake me and send me into a place I’ve never been before. When I finally come back down to earth, I’m lying on my stomach, my legs spread.
Alone.
I know this because I hear the door click shut quietly and then retreating footfalls.
This is the part where I’m supposed to get pissed. Instead, I feel hot tears trickle down onto the pillow, as Minnie’s words echo in my head. If I was the one, if I was really the one whom Law wanted, I’m pretty sure he’d love me enough not to make me feel like a whore.
That’s when I make my decision and fall asleep with a solid plan in mind.
Love may not be everything it’s cracked up to be, but life is always what you make of it, and this time, I’m not willing to wait around for something that never existed.
Chapter Thirty
Law
Things are going great, just as I planned, and as far as I’m concerned, my life has never been more under control. Nic is firmly in line
and playing her part, and the business is even going so great that I hired Jared, another assistant, just to keep up with things.
Wheeling and dealing may have not been my dream, but I can’t deny the rush I get every time I land a big deal or negotiate the hell out of a deal that was already fair to begin with.
I’m enjoying knowing that I’ve not only cemented myself into a good place with the business, but that things are going so great that Dad and Nic have congratulated me on many occasions for my stellar performance.
The only dark cloud was when Mom cancelled our impromptu nuptials on the grounds that she only has one daughter and she’s been dreaming of a magnificent wedding.
Nic agreed, damn her. So now, instead of being married and having a solid hold on her, I’m sitting on my laurels waiting for them to set a date.
I can still remember yesterday’s argument, and man, was it loud.
“I’m not taking this shit a moment longer, Mom. The two of you need to set a freaking date and get on with things. It’s been two months, and I want to be married before we have another baby.”
They’d both looked at me through narrowed eyes before sharing a look and then nodding. Nic looked away, avoiding my gaze, as my mom levelled a hard stare on me and told me to mind my manners or she’d box my ears so hard I’d hear bells ringing for days.
“But Mom, be reasonable here. What if Nic’s already pregnant? Do you want another grandchild born—?”
“If you know what’s good for you, boy, you won’t finish that sentence.”
Now my mom is a tiny, unassuming scrap of a woman, but when she uses a certain tone, no man alive would risk his balls by defying her.
Nic looked ready to spit obscenities at me, and Mom’s mouth was so pinched I feared for her cheeks if she sucked them any harder.
“Now get this straight, boy. We’re planning a wedding. We’ll be ready when we’re ready and not a day before, so you can take your cheeky ass on to work and leave us in peace. Unless you would like to plan the wedding of my dreams while Nico and I take a well-deserved spa week?”
LUCI (The Naughty Ones Book 2) Page 79
