“She couldn’t stop throwing up,” Emmie explained. “We got worried and took her in. They gave her an IV, which has seemed to help with the dehydration. Other than that, she’s perfectly healthy and the baby has a strong heartbeat.”
I swallowed, nearly overcome. “You heard the heartbeat?” I rasped.
Emmie’s gaze softened at my obvious emotion. “We saw it. It was too early to hear it. It was like little wings flapping. Really cool.”
And I’d fucking missed it.
“Congratulations, man,” Gunner put in, clapping me on the back. Max followed suit.
“You can congratulate me when my hand’s on her belly where it belongs,” I muttered, raking a hand over my hair. “I’m goin’ in there,” I stated, my eyes on the door that separated me from my family.
“I don’t know, man,” Gunner grumbled.
I turned narrowed eyes on him. “I do.”
“Mad.” The authoritative tone wasn’t one I’d heard from Olivia before. “I know you’d do anything for Frannie. This time it means giving her space.”
Scarlet’s words came back to me from when Francesca had first been injured. She hadn’t needed it then, space. My ability to provide the one thing I was reluctant to give my girl hadn’t been tested… until now.
And yet, my instinct screamed at me not to let go. That if I did, I might never get her back.
“I get you, Livie.” My voice sounded foreign in my ears, a pained rasp. “But my girl’s in there, sick and pregnant with my baby. She’s doubting me, doubting us when she’s never been anything other than my entire world. So, I’m gonna go to her. Not because I don’t respect her, not because I don’t love her, but because I do.”
I was surprised when a slow smile spread across her face. “All right, big brother. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
I snorted. My girl was a fighter and had faced far more sinister adversaries. Even so, I heeded her warning. “I won’t.”
I walked into Max and Wren’s home, mentally noting that I needed to get a start on building a home for Francesca and me. Especially when it would be more than just the two of us soon. I hadn’t even thought much about kids; it had never been on my radar. And now, knowing Francesca was pregnant, it was as though it had been a dream all of my life—one she was now fulfilling that I was determined to pay back tenfold.
The house was quiet save for the dogs’ whining out on the back porch. Max must have put them out along with their pet pig Rosie. For anyone else it might seem weird that they had a pig, but for Max and Wren it worked somehow.
I pushed into the guest room, finding my girl curled on her side, her back to the door, looking so small and fragile in the big bed.
I ached to wrap my arms around her, to protect her from anything that could harm her. Knowing it was me who’d caused her pain was something that would haunt me for the rest of my days. I stripped out of my clothes and climbed in beside her dressed only in boxers. I resisted the urge to pull her close, not wanting to disturb her, and settled for listening to her breathe, imagining I could hear the beat of my baby’s heart, cocooned safely in her mother’s belly.
I couldn’t say why I thought it was a girl, but as I drifted off to sleep all I could imagine was a beautiful baby girl with wide brown eyes and rosy pink cheeks smiling up at me with her mother’s grin.
With my luck she’d be as beautiful as her mother.
I was so fucked.
Chapter 24
FRANCESCA
When I woke up early the next morning, for a moment it was as though everything was as it should be. Maddox’s smell and heat enveloped me as I slowly slid into wakefulness.
Then it all hit me like a ton of bricks.
He’d lied.
Slowly, I slid away from him, surprised when he didn’t wake up. Usually he woke immediately when I left the bed, even if it was to use the bathroom in the middle of the night. A pang of guilt slid through me at the realization that he must be exhausted after a round-trip drive to Vegas and back and then driving up to Max’s in the middle of the night. I forced the emotion away, determined to find some space.
Maddox wouldn’t give it willingly; I’d have to take it.
I slipped from the bedroom, unsure of my destination but needing an escape. I was relieved my stomach seemed willing to cooperate for the moment as I made my way out to the gorgeous living room with high ceilings and floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the trees and land beyond.
“If you need to clear your head for a bit, you can borrow my car.” Wren’s quiet voice behind me had me barely suppressing a shriek of surprise. She paused, her expression soft. “But, fair warning, space is relative around here. One of the guys will need to follow you.”
I’d never risk my baby’s safety, and nodded, accepting that fact. “I don’t know if I can drive your car,” I admitted. Wren had a gorgeous classic car that Max had fixed up for her.
She smiled. “I was talking about our SUV. I love you, girl, but I don’t loan out my baby.”
I laughed quietly, accepting the keys she put in my hand. “You’re sure?”
She threw up her hands. “Hey, if Mad asks, you snatched them.” She winked. “But I know you’re going through a lot right now. If you need to clear your head—I get that.”
“I so do,” I breathed. “Thank you.”
Moments later I was driving down their driveway, Gunner’s truck in my rearview mirror. He hadn’t said a word when I’d emerged from the house, he’d simply offered a chin lift, indicating he’d follow me, and had started up his truck.
Maddox would likely give him hell, but the fact that Gunner had my back, that they all did, had a warm feeling spreading in my chest despite my current turmoil. These people truly were my friends as well.
At first, I hadn’t been sure of my destination, but within a mile I knew exactly where I wanted to go.
When I pulled up to the bakery a short time later, I marveled at the progress Maddox and the club had made in a few short weeks. Maddox had taken on the project with a determination that could have stemmed from nothing but love.
And he did love me, that much I knew.
I felt so confused.
I let myself into the dark building, leaving Gunner in the parking lot. I turned on a few lights, heading for the kitchen. Baking had always been a source of freedom for me, a time I could create, to make something mine during a time where nothing truly was. And as I pulled out the few ingredients we’d already stocked, and the beautiful baking instruments I’d only dreamed of using before, I lost myself in that creation once again.
It wasn’t long before movement in my periphery caught my eye. I nearly jumped a mile at the sight of Axel leaning against the doorframe.
“Didn’t mean to startle you.” His baritone was steady and assured, much like the man himself.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, confused.
“Maddox sent out the alarm a little while ago, wanting to know where you were. I was in the neighborhood, figured I’d find you here.”
I was surprised that he knew me better than I’d realized.
“Gun told him where you were. I figure we have a few minutes before my son comes barreling after you.”
Of that I had little doubt. “I wanted some time to clear my head,” I admitted.
He nodded thoughtfully. “Mad told me what he kept from you. I’ve been mulling it over in my head, trying to make sense of it. It wasn’t right, I get that. And you have the right to be pissed, I’m sure you won’t be hidin’ that fact.” He eyed me meaningfully. “All I can say is that my son loves you to the point of insanity.” He scratched his beard, lost in thought. “From the moment he was born, Mad loved hard.” His tone was uncharacteristically warm as he talked about his oldest son. “Even when he got older, he was never shy about hugs from his mama or telling his family he loved them. He just… owned it. Along with his confidence and determination, it was all just core to who he was from the beginning. I didn’t th
ink it possible for that part of him to grow, to be more. But with you, from the moment he met you, it was. It is.”
I watched him, my mouth agape. I’d never heard Axel say so many words at once. And he wasn’t done.
“I won’t make excuses for him. Hell, I’ve made my own mistakes, blinded by love for his mother. All I can say in his defense is that he’s a Black. When we meet the woman we’re supposed to be with it’s like a ball of devotion in our bellies, ready to explode at the notion of any risk, any harm coming to her. You can’t believe you have something so powerful and so fragile at the same time.”
“Lying won’t solve anything,” I shared quietly.
“No,” he agreed. “And I’m sure my boy has already learned that lesson.”
“I know he loves me,” I admitted.
“Good. ’Cause if you know that, if you truly believe it, you two can get through anything.”
I nodded, my eyes cast down at the batter in my mixing bowl. “It just hit me all wrong. Almost everyone I knew before used me or avoided me because of my name. I still struggle with where I come from,” I confessed.
“From everything I’ve heard, you come from two parents who loved you. You’ve got a gentle spirit and fire in your belly. If your past helped you become the woman you are today, I say maybe it’s time you embraced it. Wear that shit like the battle scar it is. Where you came from never shaped the way Mad feels about you, the way we all feel about you. We’re proud as hell. You should be too.”
I blinked back tears, moved beyond words at his declaration. I was about to reply when the front door was shoved open, a frantic-looking Maddox stalking into the room.
“What the fuck?” he roared, his gaze wild as it landed on me and then his father. “What are you doing here? Why is she crying?” he demanded, his breathing labored as though he’d run from somewhere.
“He didn’t make me cry. Well, he did sort of,” I blathered. “But in a nice way.”
“Just checkin’ on your girl until you could get here, Mad,” Axel assured him calmly. “I’ll leave you to it.”
Father and son exchanged a look that stated Mad had his work cut out for him.
“Thanks, Axel,” I murmured.
“Anytime, darlin’.” He nodded, and with a final chin lift to his son made his way to the exit.
“You scared the shit outta me,” Maddox exclaimed, ripping his hand through his hair in agitation.
His admonishment sparked my anger.
“You don’t get to tell me to be careful. You lied to me.” My words were a pained whisper as I churned my whisk violently through the batter.
“I didn’t lie.” His voice was quiet, determined. “I just didn’t share.”
I scoffed, shooting daggers at him. “To me they’re one and the same.”
He nodded. “You’re right. I knew Angelo had a niece.” His admission had me bracing for the rest. “I was curious about you. I can’t say why. I didn’t have any sort of ulterior motive. I didn’t plan to seek you out but when my bike broke down near where I knew your bakery was, I found myself going inside. Then, sweets, swear to God, you looked at me and I was done for. I think I fell in love with you on the spot.”
I looked up at him, surprised by his admission, my hand poised over the bowl. He looked tired, dark circles making his eyes look even brighter as he stared back at me.
“If I told you I knew who you were, you would have dismissed me on the spot.” He raised a brow, challenging me to argue. I remained silent, knowing he was right. I would have shut down immediately had he told me then. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t have told me soon after. “And I’d never wanted someone or something so badly in my life,” he continued vehemently. “Maybe it was the wrong decision, and I know I should have told you since then. But I swear, baby, it was nothing more than me being so stupid in love with you. I was afraid to do anything to risk that. To risk you.”
“How much did you know about me?” I demanded.
“Not a lot,” he replied. “Gunner was doing some digging into the Rossi family. All I knew initially was that you ran the bakery and didn’t seem to associate with the rest of your family. I wondered what your story was, if you were lonely.” His voice was soft, tender as I tried to reconcile his concern and the fact that he’d lied to me.
He took a step in my direction and in another moment, he was standing in front of me, coaxing my body to face his so that he could look into my eyes. The whisk was still clutched in my hand, smearing batter on both of us as he drew me closer. “That day I first walked into the bakery, you became my world. All I wanted to do was to protect you. Maybe I went about that the wrong way, but that was where my heart was at.”
“You should have told me,” I replied dully. Some of his words had gotten through, but I was still hurt, immensely so. “What happens the next time you feel like you could lose me over something? Or need to protect me? Will you lie then too?” I challenged. “Will it be up to Stephanie to tell me the truth?”
His eyes sparked with anger at the mention of her name. “I will always protect you,” he vowed. “But I swear, I’ll never lie to you again. By omission or otherwise. And as for Stephanie, if she wasn’t a woman there’d be a hell of a lot more retribution coming her way. As it is, she’s been forced to leave town and she won’t be welcome back. Ever.”
I stared at him, my emotions in turmoil.
He wrapped his arms around my waist. “You and this baby matter more to me than anything on this planet. I’ll work every day to deserve you both.”
I sucked in a surprised breath. “I didn’t realize you knew.”
He looked down at me, his eyes shining with a contentment I hadn’t seen in him before. “I forced it out of them.” He shrugged without apology. “I was freaked the fuck out that you were sick and I didn’t know why. They said the baby looks good? That you’re okay?” His expression was cautiously hopeful.
I nodded. “I’ve been feeling off for a few weeks now. I thought it was just stress. But it got much worse yesterday.”
“How could you not have told me you were feeling sick?” he demanded.
I looked down at my hands, knowing I should have probably told him. “I didn’t want to worry you. You’ve been working so hard on the bakery and trying to take care of things with my uncle. I didn’t want to put more on your plate.”
“I’m your man.” His statement was a forceful growl as he gripped my hips for emphasis. “I will do whatever needs to be done to take care of you, always. It’s my right and my fucking privilege.”
The air hung heavy between us, thick with tension.
His hand dropped to my belly. “You were already everything I ever wanted—now you’re giving me the greatest gift, one I didn’t even know I needed and now already can’t live without. You can’t keep things from me, Francesca. I need to be able to take care of you and our baby. Do you understand that?” His nostrils flared as he swallowed hard.
I stared at him, wanting to say yes and make this go away but unable to fight the turmoil in my chest. “Then maybe you shouldn’t have started off our relationship under false pretenses.” I swallowed hard, determined not to falter now. “I thought for the first time that I had something that had nothing to do with who I was or where I came from, but as it turned out, it had everything to do with it! I thought when we met that for once, I had something pure, something that was really mine.” My eyes welled with tears that slid unchecked down my cheeks. “A baby was nowhere on my radar, but she is everything to me. I will give her the love my parents gave me before they died. I will give her everything I never had, including embracing her family name and knowing it can mean something good.” I was openly crying now, my emotions haywire.
He swiped a thumb against my cheek with a tenderness that only made me cry harder. “Why are you so sure it’s a girl?” he asked gently.
I shrugged. “I had a dream. It felt so real. Maybe I’m wrong….”
“I had a dream too,” he a
dmitted. “A gorgeous little girl as beautiful as her mother,” he murmured reverently. “Baby.” He continued after a beat of silence. “I love you for who you are, and that includes your name. How your uncle chose to live his life has nothing to do with your goodness and everything you’ll pass down to our child. I wouldn’t change a thing.” His nostrils flared as he stared at me with blistering intent. “I am yours, Francesca, and you are mine.” I knew his use of my formal name then was deliberate, showing me my life was mine, including the name my parents had given me. “Don’t get that twisted just because I wandered into your bakery based on a simple curiosity. Every moment after that was all you and all me.”
I stared into his face, his expression lit with determination and love.
“I should have told you sooner, that’s on me,” he continued. “I was trying to protect you—even from a shit decision I made. It won’t happen again. I need you to believe that.”
“I do,” I admitted after a beat. “I’m still mad at you, but I do trust that.”
He blew out a relieved breath, wrapping his arms around my waist. “You being mad at me, I can deal with. You not believing in me, in us… couldn’t live with that, baby.”
My stomach chose that moment to protest and I raced for the bathroom. I dropped to my knees just in time, losing the contents of my stomach.
His hand rubbed my back in soothing strokes as I fought for breath, my stomach muscles aching.
“I want a second opinion,” he growled.
“It’s just morning sickness, Mad,” I panted.
“Maybe. Still want a second opinion. I’ll call Scarlet, see who she recommends.”
Obviously there was no arguing with him. “Fine.” I groaned, bracing my forehead on my forearms over the toilet bowl. I’d become way too familiar with this position as of late. “A specialist is probably going to be in Las Vegas,” I reminded him once I was fairly sure I was done being sick—for the moment anyway.
“Then we’ll go to Las Vegas,” he responded swiftly.
Maddox Page 14
