by Mel Todd
I sat there on my couch, taking another large mouthful of rum and coke, even as in my memories I watched myself peer at him. Shake him.
Huh, I never noted before his eyes were rolled back up in his head. He kinda looks like Jo did. But you don't emerge until after puberty.
Thinking back, I remembered I'd started my first period the month before. It sucked and I was still whining about how unfair it was boys didn't have to deal with this. I felt myself smile at the memory. Stupid kid complaints.
Heat seared me as I reached for him and I flinched back. That was another clue I'd searched for, rapid onset high temperature. Though if his body was that hot with fever, he would have already had irreversible brain damage. I watched my body react to the heat. It was like something had hit me too. A pain to the heart and mind so great that I blacked out for a few seconds. I remember feeling like my inner self was being attacked, that I fought with everything in me to break free for what felt like an eternity. Then the ribbon of power collapsed, sinking into me, pooling, merging with my very essence.
From all witness accounts nothing happened that day at the park. Stevie had collapsed and I ran over to him crying. Nothing more was reported. My fear and trauma were creating false memories, nothing else made sense. I'd probably never know for sure what happened, but I always figured it was me feeling my twin die or at least start to die. Maybe it was his soul pulling away from mine. And that was my psyche dealing with the breaking of our bond.
Stevie and I had been best friends. I always knew when he was lying. He always could time things to make me smile. Sometimes I thought we'd both grow up to be mages as we could almost hear each other's thoughts. But that didn't happen and would never happen for either of us.
I never knew how long I was out. It was probably just a few seconds as I was still kneeling and panting for breath as if I forgotten to breathe for too long while running. He lay there, limp; his body now cold instead of burning hot. I remember pulling him into my arms, screaming his name, screaming for help. At this point the world always seemed to kick into gear. I heard other children scream, parents yelling, the creaking of the swing as it moved in the wind, but all I could see was his limp body.
There were strange marks all over his face and arms. Then I just thought they looked like little sunbursts, now I know they were petechiae. Pulling him even tighter, I begged him to wake up and look at me. His eyes fluttered open for the briefest moment, eyes the same amber brown as mine looking back at me.
Pausing the memory, I looked deep into his eyes, noting the pupils dilating as he stared up at me, the frown creasing his brow, and then he closed his eyes and was gone.
It started up again with me screaming, sirens, people talking to me. I stopped it again. I drained the coke, wanting more rum, but drinking while lost in my mind was too easy. Getting up to make more took too much effort. The booze swirled around my system as I looked at the stopped picture.
How did they get there so fast?
I'd never asked that question before, but it had been a few years since I let myself fall into that day. To relive everything. I had learned response times down to the minute for most people in our town. Why hadn't I ever asked why they got there so fast?
Time distortion in traumatic events is normal. There isn't anything odd about it. I'd learned from the autopsy report that something hit Stevie so fast and hard the cells in his body burst. Overwhelming catastrophic cellular failure.
I still had that report. I'd stolen it from my parents. Not that they would have cared. That thought pushed me up and moving to pour myself another drink. I could see the exploding blood vessels in his eyes. Making him look like a failed zombie makeup. After making my drink, I curled back up, taking another large gulp. The strength of it made me gasp, but I welcomed the sting as I got pulled back into the memory. I had held him screaming. Even in the memory I couldn't figure out what I said. Help? Don't die? Maybe I just screamed. Any or all of them were correct. I could see them rushing towards me. Police, EMTs, fire. They tried to pull him from me, but I had him locked so tight to my body they couldn't get him.
"Corisande Munroe? That's your name, right?" In my memory, I turned and looked. Laurel Amosen knelt there. Talking to me in rapid words as people around us shout for a backboard and stretcher. "This is your brother. We need you to let him go so we can help him."
Even then, days before I became an almost teen, I knew there was no help for him. No reason to let him go. The memory, the emotion slammed back into me and I took another swallow trying to drown the emotions. The tears.
"We need you to let him go. Please Corisande. We need to help him." Watching again, her hands seemed to move in slow motion but I knew they were fast, strong, needing to pull him from me. She did, she reached in and pried my hands apart. Others grabbed him and pulled him away. I lunged forward trying to grab him, but Laurel was there. I saw her insignia bars. I hadn't realized she was only a lieutenant back then. I had known she'd risen through the ranks, but I'd always thought she'd been the captain then. I blamed her for making me let him go. I watched again, the memory and feelings overlapping in my heart. She'd held me tight as I'd screamed and struggled while they loaded him on a gurney and raced away. The next time I saw him was in the funeral home during the viewing. The south had traditions that even growing up here I hated. Seeing him lying there; still, dead, not the brother I had loved so badly.
The memory dissolved. After that my parents withdrew into themselves unable to look at me without crying. After that everything crumbled away.
A drop of wetness hit my hand. Touching my face, I realized I was crying again. Why? It wouldn't change anything. I chugged down what was left of my drink and grabbed the new phone. Twenty minutes later I had multiple reminders set, my clothes laid out for tomorrow and was as ready I could be.
I headed to my room and set the mechanical alarm Jo had given me years ago, ignoring the emotional pain as I put it down on the other side of the room.
It had been such an exhausting day I should have passed out the second I laid down. Instead I looked at the ceiling, my mind caught on two images from that day. Stevie laying there, body arched, eyes rolled back in his head, and the strange heat. It felt almost textbook emergence. But that wasn't possible. While there were certain physical conditions that might cause puberty to start or end early, neither of us suffered from them. So why did that image tug at me? It just had to be a coincidence. Strong physical damage or poison could cause similar reactions or damage to the body. There could have been something. After all, I knew how he died. I just didn't know why.
Everything I did was to gather more information, to figure out why he died. Why he had died and I didn't. I snorted a bit to myself. I'd keep looking, but I suspected I'd find out who the detective was looking for before I ever quit looking for the reason my brother died.
Whatever. I need to get over this tears crap. I can't bring him back. Nothing I do will change anything.
And that thought hurt worse than anything else. I didn't remember falling asleep.
The next thing I knew I was back at that moment, reaching out towards his limp body, but this time there was more. That endless moment of blackness, of a struggle, wrapped around me. I felt myself pushing and pulling on a thick stream of swirling light connected into me as it was being pulled out of me. It hurt as it tugged and pulled, emptying me out. My dream-self—somehow I knew it was a dream, but it wasn't a dream. Confused, I watched myself as I grabbed that stream and pulled. Like a tug of war that pulled at my very essence. I panicked and yanked hard, every bit of me in the fight to stay whole. Something snapped on the other side, I felt it reverberate through that solid yet flexible stream. The end, much longer and larger than I could have believed, came flying back through the void towards me. It impacted with a resounding crash that had no sound, but I felt in every cell of my body. The feeling shocked me out of my sleep, and I woke up laying there - panting, heart racing, and sweat pooling on my body. I knew if
I had stayed, I would have ended back next to the swings at the moment I woke up from blacking out.
I tried to slow my racing heart, but what I couldn't manage to push out of my mind was the vague impression of a figure at the other end of the stream collapsing as it snapped back into me.
It was just a dream. Right?
Chapter 16
If you think you might be a mage, get tested. Always free, and knowing is better than not knowing. ~ OMO Advertisement
Second shift, I swear by all that is holy, I'll do anything for second shift.
The chant stayed in my mind as I slogged through the pouring rain to the bus stop at six in the morning. The urgent care clinic I had been assigned to lay on the other side of town. With the bus route I should get there at least fifteen minutes early.
I didn't even bother to look around as I huddled in my coat under the flimsy protection of the bus stop. You would think, given that it rained as much in Georgia as Oregon some years, they'd build better bus stops. My coat didn't keep all the water out and umbrellas were a recipe for disaster for me. It never failed but something freaky would happen if I used one. My old coat, way too short, was better and safer for everyone around me. The rumble of the bus had me stepping to the edge and looking forward to the warmth and dryness inside. The pouring rain obscured my vision and I hadn't been paying attention to anything except trying to stay warm and relatively dry, which meant I didn't realize there was a puddle there until the wave of water from the bus pulling up soaked me from the waist down.
My eyes closed and I heaved a big sigh, then dragged myself onto the bus.
"Oh crap. Did I do that?" the bus driver asked, looking at my now soaked pants and shoes.
"Yes," my voice dull as I tapped my pass on the reader.
"I am so sorry. Here, sit in that seat. It has the heater blowing on it directly. Again, so sorry." The poor man was almost babbling.
I just nodded and sat down, clutching my coffee. It had to be my salvation.
At least with this much going wrong, maybe I'll get to work early, if not on time.
The second the thought finished, I cringed and waited for the world to end.
To my vague relief and surprise, it didn't. The bus pulled up at my stop, one block from the clinic door.
"I am really sorry, ma'am," the driver said again. I just shrugged. If I got mad at this stuff, I'd live my life mad. I didn't need any more negative karma in my life.
A quick glance out the bus doors showed it was only drizzling. Good, I'd make it to the front door without much trouble. I stepped off the bus onto the sidewalk. The doors closed behind me and as I started towards the front door, the sky opened. Between one step and the next, the rain started to fall so hard and fast I couldn't see in front of me. I felt the water seep into everything else that wasn't already wet.
"Really? Really?" I couldn't even muster up the energy to get upset. Instead I just splashed my way to the front of the clinic. As I stepped under the overhang the rain lightened up, back to the drizzle it had been. I cast a baleful look at the sky and pushed my way in. Melanie Strickland had asked me to arrive at seven and it was six forty-five. I'd wanted to be earlier, but the bus had been a bit slow with the rain. The waiting room was empty and there was no one behind the glass at the reception desk. I walked over and knocked on the door. Loud enough that anyone back there should be able to hear me, but not so bad as to be obnoxious.
"We don't open until seven. Please wait and we'll be with you shortly," a voice snapped back, annoyance clear in the tone.
It took me back a bit, but I replied, trying to sound like something other than how I felt, a drowned wombat. "It's Cori Munroe. I start my internship this morning?" At this point I wasn't sure about anything and it showed in my voice. There was a heavy sigh from the other side of the door, and I straightened trying to appear… something. Less bedraggled wasn't going to happen. The only reason I wasn't panicked about my phone was it had a waterproof case, and I'd put it in a plastic baggie when I put it in my pocket. Some lessons I didn't need to learn twice.
The door slammed open, and the only reason it didn't hit me was I stepped back as it unlocked. In front of me stood a slim girl, with a figure that I knew men drooled after. Slim with large breasts, dark hair colored red and yellow in beautiful braids that hit just past her shoulders. Large brown eyes, with makeup that made them dark and mysterious and skin a dark nutmeg. She was stunning and I immediately felt even more plain and unkempt.
"Wow, we got a real prize with the first one. I hope the rest are better." Her sneer was clear as she raked me up and down with her gaze.
She wore a Chaos symbol on a necklace, the gold gleaming against her skin.
Oh, please, don't let this be Melanie.
"Are you Melanie?" I tried to keep nerves from my voice. Showing weakness was bad. I knew this.
"Oh please. Not. I'm Sherlyndie." She pointed at her chest and it registered she had a name tag there. "Well, get in here before anyone else shows up." Her look up and down conveyed exactly what she thought. "Normally we'd get you a key so you could come in the staff entrance, but you won't be here long enough for us to take that risk. Follow me."
Sherlyndie turned and headed into the back, not checking to see if I followed. As she weaved through, I tried to keep track of everything. Noting room numbers, the nurses' desk, vitals stations, all stuff our training indicated I would use as a medical assistant.
She stopped at an empty office with a pile of paperwork on the desk. "There. Fill that all out. I'll see if I can find the scrubs for you. Don't take long. People are probably already coming into the waiting room sure they are dying because they have a mosquito bite."
And she was gone before I could ask any questions. I dug in the desk for a pen and started going through the paperwork. It really didn't take long. Most of it was HIPPA, health information privacy forms. Acknowledgment I wasn't a medical professional, and a few other things to make sure I got credit for the hours that I worked there. Then I waited. My wet clothes clinging to me making me even clammier. I wished I could work without a bra, but while I wasn't endowed like Jo was, my breasts were a bit too much to be able to work without one.
And I waited.
Glancing at my phone it showed that it was after seven-thirty. Completely unsure I stuck my head out the door, which I'd left open the entire time, but I didn't see anyone. I sighed and moved out into the hall trying to remember where the nurses' station was. Making my way back through the maze I worked again on trying to memorize where everything was.
Maybe I'll be lucky, and they'll have driers in the bathrooms.
Two women sat at the desk, one of them Sherlyndie. The other was middle aged, probably fifty, with short cropped brown hair. I didn't see any tattoos or jewelry, but that didn't mean anything. You weren't required to be marked at hedgemage rank.
"Who are you?" the second woman asked, her voice sharp, annoyed, and familiar.
"Melanie? I'm Cori Munroe."
She blinked, looked at me, then at Sherlyndie, who just smirked. "I see. What have you been doing?" She seemed more resigned than annoyed, which implied a lot about having a mage working there.
"I filled out all the paperwork."
"Excellent. Any questions, and don't have any questions. We're swamped today. My other MA didn't show up."
Great way to set me up for failure. Thank you so much. I don't get paid for this, remember?
Even though the thoughts rattled around my brain I forced a smile. "Not really. But I do need those scrubs. And a place to change. As you can see, I'm a bit wet."
The office temperature was cool enough that I hadn't dried out much. I pulled the wet clothes from my torso with a soft slurp.
"What? Did you jump into a river before coming in? I swear." She huffed and stood up. I got the feeling she huffed a lot. "This way."
In short order I had scrubs that fit, barely. They were too big, but that was for the best. She also found a t-shirt that fi
t from one of their sponsorship things. It had a big heart walk logo on it. I didn't care. It was dry. Bonus was the towel and hospital socks that she handed me.
"Get cleaned up as best you can and meet back in the central area. And hurry. We seem to be getting lots of traffic today."
I just nodded, slipped into the bathroom and gratefully out of my wet clothes. After I toweled off my hair and rubbed my skin briskly to try and warm up, I wrapped up my underwear in it and twisted the towel hard. That made them just slightly damp, not wet. The moisture-wicking underwear was proving to be worth what I paid for them. A few minutes later, dressed in the scrubs and my still damp shoes, I stepped out and headed to the central area.
"Is there a bag or something I can shove these in?" I held out my wet clothes and jacket. Melanie grabbed a plastic grocery bag from a drawer in her desk.
"Shove it in here. This is your area." She pointed to a corner with a computer. Then she handed me a checklist with a note pad. "Here are your duties. The system will tell you who to call and what room to put them in. You go get them from the waiting room, get their weight, height, temperature, blood pressure. Then in the room call up their record and enter what the complaint is. If it is serious and you think it might require immediate attention, grab Lyndie. Then come back, update, and grab the next one on the list." She paused and looked at me, a faint look of horror on her face. "You do know how to use the EPIC system, right?"
"A little bit?" Weren't they supposed to be training me? "They trained us on it and went over how to find all the stuff you just listed." And I wasn't lying. We'd had a week's training on it last semester. Over three months ago. I stiffened my spine. I'd figure it out. Though I looked at the computer with trepidation. I really hoped they had good anti-static protection. As wet as I was, hopefully I wouldn't be that conductive.
"Oh good. Here's your temp badge and your access codes. Remember the forms you signed prevent you from divulging anything you may see. Go. I've got to get someone roomed while I wait for you to get up to speed." Her frustration was clear, and I wanted to snap back, but I bit back my attitude. References were important.
