by J. H. Croix
I heard my words and distantly wondered why I wasn’t startled by them. I should’ve been. I was stumbling headlong into a madness of my own making here. I didn’t want ‘one’ woman ever. I hewed to keeping relationships quite casual and appreciated the side perk of being a recognized sports star, which offered ample casual opportunities. Oh, there were plenty of women looking for more, but I avoided them like the plague. I wasn’t the worst of my mates, certainly not. I minded my business and made sure every woman left my bed thoroughly satisfied.
But Olivia. She was something else altogether. I wanted her with a ferocity I didn’t recognize, and I couldn’t have turned away from it if I tried. She was quiet, her eyes pinned to me. I reached for her, curling my palms over her forearms and slowly unfolding them. I slid my hands down until I reached hers and held them in mine. My heart was pounding—a hard, fast beat against my ribs. I idly stroked a thumb over the soft skin of her wrist, feeling the flutter of her pulse underneath.
Her breath drew in sharply and her eyes stayed locked on mine. She was in her scrubs again today, a bright blue pair that contrasted with her dark hair and creamy complexion. She shifted on her feet. “Liam, this is crazy,” she finally said with a soft sigh.
I shook my head and freed one of her hands to lift mine and give into the urge to untie her hair. With a flick, the curls tumbled loose around her shoulders. Sweet hell. With her hair down, she nearly took my breath away. Her curls were a dark, wild riot. They hinted at the passion she tried so hard to hide. I sifted my hand through them, savoring the feel of her silky locks sliding through my fingers. I stepped closer and slid my other hand down her spine, pulling her close against me. I could feel ripples running through her body, while mine was tight as a drum, my cock so hard I could hardly bear it. But bear it I would. Because the challenge Olivia offered only grew more tempting.
I wasn’t accustomed to having to do anything on someone else’s terms, but as much as I wanted to rush this, I knew I couldn’t. Olivia would knock me back, no matter how tempted she was. So, I wouldn’t rush, but I wasn’t leaving her office without at least another taste of her lips.
I slowly leaned back, just far enough to loosen my hand from her curls and remove her glasses, setting them on the desk beside us. The air around us was heavy, laden with the pulsing beat of desire. I wanted to think I was in control, but the truth was, it was just barely. I felt as if I was freefalling. Pausing to look down at her, I threaded my hand into her hair again and dipped my head. Even though it took every ounce of discipline I had, I moved slowly. I could hardly have stood it if she didn’t let me kiss her, but for some reason I had to know she wanted it enough not to push me away.
Olivia’s eyes darkened to a deep green, and her breath came in shallow gasps. She startled me when she slipped her hand up around my neck and yanked me to her, pausing when my lips were but a whisper away from hers. “Dammit, don’t make me any crazier than I already am,” she whispered fiercely. The feel of her lips brushing mine when she spoke snapped my control.
Chapter 10
Olivia
By the time Liam fit his mouth over mine and finally—finally!—kissed me, I was about out of my mind. In the weeks since our last kiss, I’d almost convinced myself I’d exaggerated how good it felt to kiss him. I was wrong, so very, very wrong. The moment I looked up and saw him standing in my office, heat roared through me. I tried to hold onto my sanity, but I couldn’t. When he was near, I was torn inside. There was the rational part of my brain that knew what I was doing was wrong, so very wrong. Yet, the raw need I felt for him overpowered everything else, most certainly my reason. With his hand cupping my bottom and holding me firm against him, I gasped when he arched his hips into mine, the hard ridge of his cock brushing against my clit. I almost came right then and there—that’s how tightly wound I was.
If someone had asked me how I liked to be kissed, I’d have shrugged and said it didn’t matter. Kisses were just as boring as sex, or so I thought until Liam kissed me. Now I knew I liked the bone-melting combination of slow, long, hot and deep—his tongue alternated between deep sweeps inside, tangling with mine, and then slow traces around my mouth, nips on my bottom lips and overpowering kisses in between. By the time he tore his lips free for air, I was gasping and nearly frantic inside. He looked down at me, his eyes a blur of blue, his gaze so intent it sent my belly in a slow flip. I was drenched and shifted my legs restlessly, seeking relief from the pressure building inside. His cock was hot and hard against me, and I wanted him inside me. Now.
His eyes searched my face before he turned, angling us so my hips bumped against the desk. He curled his hands around my hips and lifted me, swiftly stepping in between my knees and pulling me flush against him. I was so sensitive, I moaned at the subtle pressure of his cock against my clit. I’d gone mad, plain and simple. I forgot where we were and forgot all the reasons why I shouldn’t be doing this. I curled my legs around his hips and arched into him.
Shoving his shirt up, I sighed at the feel of his skin under my hands—hot and smooth, his hard muscles flexing under my touch. He brushed my curls out of the way and trailed kisses down my neck, sending hot shivers through me. Meanwhile, he cupped my breasts in his hands, brushing his thumbs back and forth over my nipples, which were tight and achy. Sensation teemed inside as he shoved my top up. He lifted his head, his mouth curling at one corner. “You’re naughtier than you let on,” he murmured.
By some miracle, I formed a partial thought, wondering what he was talking about. My question must have shown on my face. “This is hardly a bra,” he said, snapping the slender strap and running his fingers lightly over the sheer silk.
My cheeks heated, and need scored me straight to my core. I forgot to respond when he dipped his head and swirled his tongue over a nipple. I cried out when his lips closed over it, drenching the silk. He pulled away with a little nip of his teeth and turned his attention to the other nipple. I did like things to be in balance. By the time he lifted his head again, I was grinding my hips against him. I’d never have believed I could come just from the feel of his mouth on my nipples, but I almost did.
I wanted more. I tore at his jeans, but he stepped back and stopped me, his grip on my wrists firm. His expression was pained as he looked back at me. “Liam, I need…”
He shook his head. “Not this. Not now,” he said in a low voice.
My need was coiled so tight, it lashed impatiently within. “That’s not fair,” I said, almost churlishly. Since I’d lost my hold on reason and blown past boundaries I held dear, it annoyed me he was putting the brakes on. There was that and the pounding need seeking release.
He eased his grip and stroked a hand down my belly, past the waistband of my scrubs. His palm cupped me through the silk of my panties. My channel throbbed, slick with wet heat. His eyes caught mine. “I want to bury myself so deep inside you we both forget where we end and begin. I don’t want to rush, so it won’t be here.”
I stared into his deep blue gaze, his words slamming into me. A distant warning bell rang in my mind, but it was faint, drowned out in the storm of emotion and desire nearly tearing me apart inside. He was so confident, so positive there would be more, that I should’ve been angered and sought to snatch control back. But I was well and truly lost in this moment and latched onto the promise in his words, nearly frantic to demand we leave right now and go somewhere else if that’s the only way I’d feel him buried inside me.
As he spoke, he began to drag a finger back and forth over the silk wet silk. My hips arched into his touch. In the midst of the heavy quiet with nothing but the sound of our breath, my desk phone rang. I jumped and started to scramble back on the desk.
“Oh no,” he said, his gruff, haughty tone sending a ripple through me.
He shoved my panties out of the way and slid two fingers inside me just as he circled his thumb over my swollen clit. I came so hard and fast, I saw stars.
Liam slowly pulled his hand away, neatly put th
e silk between my thighs and tugged my pants back up to my waist. I was so stunned, I could barely think, much less move. Before I realized it, he’d straightened my shirt, pulling it down over my wet bra. My body was reverberating as awareness filtered back in. My phone beeped, indicating whoever had called had left a message.
I couldn’t seem to snap out of it. I wanted to curl up in Liam’s arms and forget about everything else right now. He reached up and brushed my hair back, sifting his fingers through the messy curls. “What do I have to do to get you to have dinner with me?” he asked softly.
I swallowed against the wave of emotion inside. I didn’t know what this madness was, but I didn’t have it in me to fight against it. Not now. Not when I didn’t think I could take it if I didn’t get more than this with him. “I’ll have dinner with you,” I whispered, feeling my cheeks heat.
He smiled, almost boyishly. He let his hands fall and stepped away. I instantly missed the heat of him, the pure strength of his nearness. “Tomorrow night then?” he asked, his eyes locked to mine.
“Okay. Um, where?”
I felt silly and unmoored. With pleasure echoing in my body, I couldn’t think too clearly. I’d so removed myself from the world of dating that I wasn’t familiar with the basics.
Liam saved me and gave a firm nod. “I’ll text you, but you’d better respond. If you don’t, I’ll come find you. You know what happens when I do that,” he said with a sly grin.
I blushed so hotly, I was surprised I didn’t burst into flames. He straightened his jeans and stepped to my desk again, helping me off. I wondered if I was having something like the opposite of an out of body experience, an in-body experience if there was such as thing. I was hyperaware of every move he made, my body attuned to him. The air around us felt weighted. I glanced up to find his eyes on me. He dipped his head and dropped a rather chaste kiss on my cheek.
“Until tomorrow then.”
At that, he turned and left my office. I watched as he walked away, my medical eye tracking his stride and pleased to see he had only the slightest hitch in his gait. When the door closed behind him, I turned and walked to the windows, staring out over the skyline. Puget Sound was visible in the distance, boats dotting the water. After a few moments, my pulse was close to normal. I ran my hands through my hair and wound it back into a knot, snagging the elastic that had fallen to the floor earlier when Liam set my curls loose. I put my glasses on and calmly sat down at my desk. I managed to check my voice mail, beyond relieved it was nothing more than a message from one of the other doctors at the clinic about an upcoming meeting.
Later that evening, I pushed through the door to the Desert Isle Café and glanced around for Daisy. I’d been back and forth all afternoon about whether to talk to Daisy about Liam, but when I saw our friend Harper with her, that made my mind up. It wasn’t that I wouldn’t look to Harper for advice, but more I wasn’t ready to bare my soul to more than one person at a time. For the first time in my life, I felt completely out of my element. I’d been so confident I’d never go gaga over a guy. And here I was gaga over Liam, so far gone I’d made out with him—big time—twice at work.
I considered myself intelligent, and I knew I was when it came to academics and medicine. My record of straight A’s ran all the way back to kindergarten. Socially, well, that’s where I floundered. I hadn’t ever had to worry about my anxiety about dating and men because it hadn’t interested me. Looking back, I could see I simply hadn’t stumbled across anyone who I had genuine chemistry with. I almost laughed aloud. I was so out of my element here. Considering what lay between Liam and I, describing it as chemistry was almost silly—more like a wild, burning conflagration. Being a surgeon had given me too much faith in the clinical lens of considering the human body. With Liam, I’d quickly discovered I’d been foolishly confident in my ability to stay detached. The physical drive to connect with him was a powerful enough force, I was utterly failing at holding back the tide. There was that and the underlying pull I felt—a pull that went beyond pure desire and didn’t fit into the tidy classifications my medical mind found comfort in.
I waved when I saw Daisy glance to the door. After grabbing a coffee at the counter, I threaded my way to the table where they were and sat down with a sigh. “Hey there,” I said as I slipped my arms out of my damp raincoat and hung it over the back of my chair.
Harper Jacobs grinned at me. “Hey you! Hope you don’t mind I crashed your weekly coffee date with Daisy.”
“Of course not,” I said before taking a long sip of my coffee. “You’re always invited.”
Harper nodded and leaned back in her chair. “I know, but I’m hardly ever on this side of town.” With her glossy straight brown hair, warm blue eyes and athletic build, Harper evoked a sense of down-to-earth outdoorsy-ness. She’d moved to the small town outside of Seattle where Daisy and I grew up during middle school and quickly become a friend. While Daisy and I were both academically oriented, Harper was the friend who dragged us out of the house. She’d been a track star in college, but her potential for more had skidded sideways after she’d been raped by an acquaintance. He’d been on the track team for a nearby university. Daisy and I had been there when her world blew apart. It had only been the last year or so that she’d finally seemed back to herself. She swore she’d never date again. She’d gotten her degree in physical therapy and consulted on cases for several clinics in Seattle. She and I made referrals to each other occasionally.
I leaned over and gave her shoulders a squeeze. “It’s nice you’re here today. How’ve you been?”
Harper shrugged. “You know, busy with work. I’m guessing the same for you?’
I nodded, but the moment I did, I thought of Liam’s fingers buried inside me when I came just a few hours ago. I swatted the thought away.
“Of course Olivia’s busy,” Daisy added. “She’s a workaholic.”
I glared at her. “No different than you.”
Daisy grinned. “Maybe not. How’s your latest sports star doing?”
I felt my cheeks heating and ignored it. I felt tossed and turned by Liam. I was putting way too much on the line, and I had no idea how to stop the madness. Before I had a chance to reply, Harper spoke.
“You mean Liam Reed?” she asked. “The clinic across town is all bitchy the Seattle Stars didn’t contract with them to see their players. It’s all so silly. I told the office manager there to remember the insurance pays the same. I decided not to point out you’re a better surgeon than anyone they have on staff,” Harper said with a sly grin.
Daisy winked. “I bet you never thought you’d get all the hot guys just because you’re the best surgeon around.”
“Oh my God,” I said with a roll of my eyes.
Daisy looked to Harper. “When we were here the other week, Liam stopped by with Alex Gordon, the hot goalie for the Stars. They were quite nice with those sexy British accents, and Liam wants to make a move on Olivia,” Daisy said with a wink as she leaned back in her chair.
I gave up fighting my blush and looked to Harper. “She’s being ridiculous.”
“No I’m not! You said he wanted to make a move on you, and trust me, he does. That man all but ate you up with his eyes.” Daisy looked to Harper. “Olivia’s being all proper and says he’s her patient. The surgery’s over, so I think she should go for it.”
It was nearly killing me to hold it in that I’d already had the two most explosive orgasms of my life with Liam, but I couldn’t say anything. Not here. Harper rolled her eyes at Daisy before turning to me. “Nice to hear the guy half the world is drooling over noticed you. You’re amazing and you never give anyone a chance.” She glanced back to Daisy, her eyes narrowing. “He might not technically be her patient now, but if Olivia wants to set some boundaries, don’t give her grief about it.”
I took a gulp of coffee, nearly bursting out in laughter at what had happened to my boundaries. After another gulp of coffee, I managed to look at Harper. “Thank you for a
dose of reason. How about we talk about something else?”
Daisy giggled, but Harper gamely shifted gears, asking me for feedback on a knee surgery that had gone awry for one of her clients. It had only been in the last year that we’d even joked about dating and men around Harper. Aside from the fact I didn’t want to dwell on Liam right now, I was so relieved to see her relaxed and easy-going about the topic I didn’t want to unintentionally carry things too far.
Hours later that night, I lay in bed with thoughts of Liam running laps in my brain. This was so not me. I usually got stuck on medical topics and often found myself up late at night looking at data from recovery rates and reviewing surgery videos. I didn’t lie in bed longing for anyone. I was restless and needy. I’d liked to have thought yet another orgasm under his magic touch would have slaked my need, but it only seemed to make it worse. The thing was, it wasn’t plain physical release I needed. I needed Liam.
Chapter 11
Liam
I leaned back on my hands on the bench and watched my team practice. As boring as it was, relatively speaking, I had learned a thing or two. I was bloody impatient to be back in play, but I was starting to recognize I could get through this time without losing my mind. They were practicing inside today, as it was drizzling yet again. It was cool enough now the coaching staff deemed it not good for our muscles to practice outside when the weather was like this. After a final play, I watched my teammates file slowly toward the locker room.
Coach strolled to the bench and sat down beside me, resting his elbows on his knees and looking ahead. “How’s the knee feeling?” he asked.
I stretched my leg out and flexed it again, sensing only a slight hitch and very little soreness. “”Good. I think. Tim says I’m moving right along.”
