by J. H. Croix
Chapter 5
Alex
“Mate, you need to loosen up,” Ethan said with a wink before he snagged a water bottle on the bench beside him and guzzled it.
I resisted the urge to glare at him and rolled my eyes instead. “And why is that?” I countered.
Ethan almost drained the water bottle before lowering it and glancing to me, swiping his sleeve across his face. We were at practice during a break for the defensive end while Coach worked with the offense. Ethan held my gaze for a moment before looking down as he idly swung the water bottle in a circle between his knees. “Ever since we lost last week, you’ve been damn serious. You’re scaring the guys who don’t know you as well.”
I’d signed with the Seattle Stars along with three players from England—Liam, Ethan and Tristan. Tristan played offense alongside Liam, while Ethan played defense with me. We’d been here over a year now, but it was true that my mates from London knew me better. “Scaring them?” I asked in return.
“Yup. On your best days, you’re quiet. I told the lads I didn’t think you were too torn up over us losing. I’ve played with you before, so I know you know it comes with the game. I didn’t tell ‘em what I really think,” he said with a sly grin.
I did glare at him now. “And what would that be?”
“Mate, you were all eyes for Harper the other night. I’ve never seen you look at a girl like that,” he said, his grin stretching wider.
I couldn’t help the laugh that rumbled from my chest. “And that has what to do with me looking too serious?”
Ethan, in typical low-key, teasing manner, winked. “She’s got you all tied up. I’ve known you for years, mate. You hardly ever date. Oh, I know you had your arrangements back in London, but they were more like business than romance. The way you looked at Harper—that was something else. If you ask me, you need to have some fun. She might help you relax.”
I stared at him and felt my jaw tightening. Damn if Ethan hadn’t somehow zeroed in on exactly what was getting to me. I was beyond tied up in knots after the other night. I’d managed to walk Harper home and see her in without tearing her clothes off and sinking inside of her right there in the hallway outside her apartment, but my self-imposed control had come at a price. I’d been damn cranky ever since. I wasn’t about to admit any of this to Ethan though. Not here and certainly not now.
Instead, I shrugged. “Maybe I like her. Otherwise, how about you lay off the amateur psychoanalysis?”
Ethan winked again and guzzled the last of the water, tossing the empty bottle into a recycling bin at the end of the bench. “Will do, mate.” He stood and started to walk away before pausing to turn back. “Not that you’re asking, but she’s got it bad for you too.”
I ran a hand through my hair and sighed, electing not to respond to Ethan’s baiting. This was nothing new from him. Ethan wasn’t one of those guys who drove me nuts with the way they treated women as another sport. Rather, he was a flirt who took flirting to great heights. He eschewed commitment and loved to tease. Now that Liam was engaged to Olivia, Ethan enjoyed teasing him about how quickly Liam had fallen. Liam was so far gone, he didn’t even care.
My mind spun to Harper—reserved Harper who’d gone and blown my mind with her boldness the other night. I’d wanted to see behind to the other side of the invisible walls protecting her, and I had. When her gorgeous blue eyes held mine right as she started to come, her channel pulsing around my fingers…holy hell, I’d almost come in my jeans. Her quiet, controlled demeanor hid a woman of fierce passion.
Somehow I knew I still hadn’t seen all of the layers fall away yet. I’d meant what I said when I told her I didn’t want to rush. I never did, but there was more than that with her. I wanted more than a mutual exchange of pleasure with her. My mind flicked back to when we’d been standing out in the rain and that car pulled up to the stoplight. It hadn’t been quite like when we’d been in the park and she’d almost frozen in place. But something flickered in her eyes. Then, she blew my mind and pushed me to the very edge of my control.
Cold showers and the mechanical release I could give myself didn’t assuage the need burning inside for her. Coach called my name, effectively snapping me out of my train of thought. As I walked back onto the pitch, I pondered when I’d see her again. She and Stanley had joined me for my morning run for the last two days, but she didn’t speak of what passed between us the other night. Nor did I. I wouldn’t wait much longer though. If anything, because I didn’t know if I could.
***
“What do you think, Alex? Blue or green?” Liam asked, holding up a stationary card.
“Come again?” I countered, puzzled at his question.
Olivia had just walked by the kitchen table where I was sitting across from Liam and fanned a series of cards in front of him on the table. She hadn’t said a word and kept on into the kitchen where she poured a glass of wine for herself and called over to us. “More beer, boys?”
Before I had a chance to reply to her, Liam did. “Two please,” he called over his shoulder, his gaze swinging back to me. He lowered his voice. “Just tell me, blue or green. These are our wedding invitations and she wants me to help pick the color.”
I chuckled and reached across the table, sliding the cards closer to me. They each had sample text in different fonts and two colors. “Blue. Definitely blue.” Instantly Harper’s gorgeous eyes came to mind. I’d almost taken her against a tree this morning. That’s how bad it was getting. She was meeting me every morning, yet those walls had gone back up, stronger than ever. I shoved my thoughts off of her and onto the topic of Liam and Olivia’s wedding invitations. “Think you’re supposed to pick the font too, mate.”
Liam’s eyes whipped to mine, just as Olivia reached the table and set down two beers. She looked between us, her green gaze assessing. At a glance, it had surprised me that Liam fell for her. She was beautiful, no doubt about that, but not the usual fun-loving, casual women Liam had dated before he met her. Olivia kept her dark curls tied up in a bun most of the time and wore glasses. At first blush, she was all business. With Liam, she was as bad off as he was. Half the time, I was reminding them they weren’t alone. I was beyond pleased Liam had found her. He’d had a rough year before we signed with the Stars. His mum died of a stroke, and he was distracted enough that he lost his touch in play and our team in London lost a crucial game as a result. Meeting Olivia had tugged him out of the fog of his grief.
Olivia looked from me to Liam. “As usual, Alex is paying better attention. I need to know what font you like too. Not just the color,” she said with a feigned sigh.
Liam met my gaze and rolled his eyes. “Right then.” He glanced up to Olivia, slipped his arms about her waist and pulled her into his lap. “That’s why he’s my best mate. He’s all about the details.”
Olivia flushed pink when Liam brazenly kissed his way down her neck. She wiggled off of his lap. “Good grief! I can’t go anywhere with you.”
“We’re at home!” Liam protested.
Olivia shook her head and bestowed a flustered smile on me. “Alex has great judgment. If he thinks blue looks best, we’ll do that. Which font do you like?” she asked me next.
After a few moments of back and forth over the fonts with them, Olivia scooped up the cards and returned them to a stack on the corner of the kitchen counter before joining us at the table. She chatted about her day and then looked to me. “So I heard you’ve been going running with Harper.”
Her statement was an abrupt change of topic. For a moment, I was flummoxed. After a beat, I nodded. “I have.”
I toyed with asking Olivia about Harper, but I wasn’t sure what I wanted to ask. Well, that didn’t quite cut it. I wanted to know everything about Harper, but worried that might reveal how powerfully I was drawn to her.
Olivia looked at me for a long moment, her eyes considering. “Good.”
I sensed something lay behind her comment, but hell if I knew what. “If you don’t
mind me asking, why would you care if I’m running with Harper?”
Olivia traced a circle around the base of her wineglass before shrugging, as if to herself. “Well, you’ll either hear it from me or someone else. Harper hasn’t gone running outside for a few years. You probably didn’t know, but she was a track star in college. She ran cross country and was ranked nationally.”
I could’ve guessed something like that. Harper easily kept pace with me and ran as if she had for many years. I didn’t know why this mattered though. “Right. So…?”
“Well, it all fell apart when we were seniors in college. She got raped by a guy from another university. Even worse, it happened when she was out running on campus. It was all over the news. It’s not like she tries to keep it a secret, but it’s not like she likes to talk about it either,” Olivia said softly.
Olivia’s words hit me like a bolt of lightning, so hard I reeled inside. Someone raped Harper? Bloody hell. On the heels of my shock came fury, raw and cold. I wanted to race out of here and find the man who hurt her and inflict the same level of horror upon him. That’s not to say I wanted to rape the guy, but beating him senseless might, just might, suffice. In the few seconds that passed since Olivia had dropped this little bomb, I forgot all about trying to keep my feelings for Harper masked. It wasn’t that I cared all that much what Liam knew. More that I wanted time to feel things out and see where they went. I was hyperaware of how easy it was to have the media sniffing at my heels. It had been slightly better since we were in the US. Football in Britain, well pretty much anywhere else in the world, was revered. Players were dogged by the local media back there. I’d managed to avoid the attention then and hoped to keep doing so now.
Whatever showed on my face nudged Liam to straighten in his chair, his eyes narrowing. I shackled the fury inside and looked at Olivia. “What the hell? Who is he?” I demanded.
Olivia’s eyes widened before her expression softened. “Alex, she’s fine. It was four years ago. It won’t do her a bit of good for you to get all riled up over this.” She glanced to Liam. “You didn’t tell him?” she asked him.
Liam’s watchful gaze caught mine before swinging to Olivia. “No. It’s not like we talk much about your friends. Not to mention it’s a bloody shitty topic. It’s awful what happened,” he replied before looking back to me. “It pisses me off too, mate, but ease up.”
I could tell he was trying to suss out what was up with me. I’d be pissed to hear about any woman getting hurt in any way. But this was Harper. In a matter of weeks, my curiosity about her had gone from simply that to far more. I was relieved with Liam’s next comment.
“I told you, luv. Alex would protect the whole wide world if he could. He’s a beast like that. Remember how I told you he was worried about you when we started dating? Hearing one of your friends got raped is like that times a million,” Liam said.
About now, he’d usually grin, but this wasn’t funny. Nothing about rape was funny. I ran a hand through my hair and took a long drag off my beer. I bloody well didn’t like being this furious without a target. My mind spun back to the day I’d encountered Harper in the park, the very day she’d first kissed me a bit later. I couldn’t help but wonder if the man we’d seen had been the very man who raped her.
Looking to Olivia, I asked, “What happened to the guy?”
Her gaze darkened and her mouth tightened, anger and resignation evident on her face. “Well, see, he was a track star too. He attended a different university, but it was right here in Seattle. Harper doesn’t hide what happened if anyone happens to ask, but she’s never talked much about the details since right after it happened. I know more from the papers than I know from her. I don’t think it will help you to get angry about something you can’t do anything about.”
“Tell me what happened,” I said, trying to keep the anger out of my tone. I wasn’t angry with Olivia, but bloody hell I needed to know what happened to the guy.
Her eyes flicked to Liam.
“Luv, just tell him what you know. If you don’t, Alex will track the details down on his own, so you might as well save him the trouble,” Liam said.
Bloody right he was. As it stood, I’d be on the guy’s scent as soon as I could.
Olivia took a gulp of wine and eyed me. “You’re a good man, Alex Gordon,” she said softly.
I took another long drag off my beer and circled my hand in the air. “Right, right. Carry on and tell me what happened to the bastard.”
“He was arrested and charged, but he got a good attorney and fought like hell. In the end, the charges were pleaded down. I’d have to look up the details on that. He served two months in jail and was released. He didn’t even have to register as a sex offender.” She shook her head furiously at that, her eyes bright with tears. “Harper’s one of my best friends. What he did was horrible, and in the end, it was hardly a speed bump for him. He got kicked off the team, but he still got to graduate.”
“Where is he now?” I asked, my focus like a laser on the present.
Olivia gulped in air and let it out in a heavy sigh. “He works at some finance place in Seattle. I try to keep tabs on him. Since he doesn’t have to register as a sex offender, I don’t know where he lives, and he does a pretty good job of keeping his online profile to a minimum.”
“Who is he?”
Liam stayed quiet, but I could tell he sensed my fury.
“His name is Joe Schmidt,” Olivia said, her worried gaze scanning my face. “Promise me you won’t try to do anything. There’s nothing to do. He was charged and convicted on whatever dumb charges they agreed on. The whole investigation ruined Harper’s life for a while. She was miserable, and it was just awful. She’s moved on. I mean, I wondered if she’d ever run outside again and now she’s running with you. That’s why I’m happy about that, but I get why you’re pissed. Trust me, every time I think about it, I want to scream. But let Harper stay moved on. Please.”
Olivia’s gentle words penetrated the fury coiling inside. I closed my eyes and took a slow breath, I hadn’t realized I was clenching a fist. I eased my grip and leaned back in my chair, opening my eyes to find two concerned gazes on me. “Right. I know you’re right,” I said, directing my words to Olivia. “Doesn’t change the fact it bloody sucks. It’s bollocks the guy spent only two months in jail. How bad…” I forced myself to stop with the questions. I’d save them for another time, or find the answers myself.
Olivia reached over and squeezed my hand. “You see Harper as she is now. She’s strong and healthy and fine. She’s really, really fine. There’s only one other thing I’d wish for her.”
“What’s that?” I asked, my question reflexive.
“I want her to find someone. She hasn’t even gone on a date since it happened. She’s so awesome, but I don’t know if she even thinks about it.” Olivia glanced between us. “I mean, right? She’s pretty and smart and funny and…”
Liam reached over and caught Olivia’s hand in his, lifting it for a kiss. “Of course she is. But I think you’re going to have to let this ball stay in Harper’s court.”
Meanwhile, I sat there stunned, my mind spinning over the revelations and wondering just what to think about what happened between Harper and me.
Chapter 6
Harper
I jogged down the stairs to the front door of my building with Stanley at my side. It was a small thing, but I loved how the stairs curved along the wall. It always felt as if I was spinning slowly down a slide and out the front door. I had a little buzz of joy inside, knowing I was about to walk out and meet Alex for another run. After he’d invited me to run with him in the mornings, I’d quickly fallen into a pattern of meeting him daily. Unbeknownst to him, his offer had given me a small gift. I used to run outside all the time, hours upon hours every week. In a blink, I lost the joy of it after an early morning run in that time where the light hadn’t quite washed away the darkness. Crossing paths with Joe at that in between time had ripped my joy
away. Joe who seemed to live somewhere nearby. Joe whose mere presence should’ve permanently scared me away from returning to the park.
I hated knowing he was near, but I felt safe with Alex and I’d missed running so. Alex had stirred deep waters in me. He made me think I could steal back what had been stolen from me. It wasn’t just the fact he made me so hot I forgot I’d once thought I’d never want to have sex again. He made me think maybe I could banish the hold Joe had on me. The fact I was running outside at all was a small miracle. I’d never stopped running, but I’d relegated myself to a treadmill. Even though the mechanics were close enough, I’d dearly missed the joy and invigoration of the fresh early morning air and watching the sunrise.
I reached the entryway and glanced to Stanley. His blue eyes met mine, and he nudged my hand with his nose. Stanley loved running too. It was safe to say he adored Alex and had come to expect our morning runs now. He pressed his nose to one of the small windowpanes along the side of the door. A glance outside told me Alex wasn’t here yet. I was looking down at my watch when Stanley let out a soft woof. Just as I wondered what he was reacting to, Alex strolled into view.
My breath hitched and my belly clenched. Damn. He was so ridiculously handsome. With his apartment east of mine, the sun was rising behind him, glinting off his dark brown hair. He walked with an easiness, emanating strength and masculine grace. Every inch of him was muscled and mouth-watering. It had been over a week since he’d practically left me in a puddle by my door. Too long. I was determined to push him past his ridiculous edge of control, but I’d yet to finagle an opportunity. Today was Saturday though, and I knew we’d be in the same place tonight. Olivia had invited me to dinner with her and Liam and said she needed some girl back up since Liam’s friends would be there.
That little buzz of joy propelled me through the door and down the steps with Stanley padding along at my side. Alex stopped at the foot of the stairs just as I reached the bottom step. His brown eyes met mine, the intensity of his gaze giving me pause. His eyes swept over me, sending a jolt through me. When he met my gaze again, I was confused. He felt coiled tight and had lines of tension bracketing his face. Even in rest, he was an intense man, but at the moment, I was taken aback. My first instinct was to want to comfort him and before I realized it, I’d reached out and slid my hand down his arm.
