He nodded. “When I was waiting to hear about if we’d been accepted into Chris’s pack or not, I baked fifteen dozen cookies. Most of them were chocolate chip.”
Laughing wasn’t appropriate, but picturing the big, tough Scott with an apron, surrounded by cookies, made her smile. “And then did you eat them?”
“Nope. I was too freaked out and on edge to actually consume any. I ended up sending most of them to the kids’ events. I’m not trying to make light of anything, but I do know what it’s like to feel the helpless way you do right now.”
She waved his words away. She’d lost her shop. Scott had lost his entire family. If she were thinking straight, she’d have seen the difference and been grateful for all the wonderful, positive things still left in her life.
“Don’t belittle your loss, Luce,” he said before she actually voiced her thoughts. “I know you’re a positive person and know the yarn and stuff can be replaced, but that was your space. It was violated and it won’t ever be the same again. No one’s going to tell you not to be sad over that—especially not me. Maybe we could find a better use for all this nervous energy.”
“I don’t want to go run around the trees in the park, Scott.”
He laughed, but she knew him. Exercise was fine and dandy, but she wasn’t a werewolf and what she needed was to be useful. Her grandma always said if there was too much in one life getting a person down, then it was time to help someone else. Maybe she’d volunteer somewhere for a while. Stocking at the food pantry or delivering meals was less crazy than re-washing an already disinfected floor.
“I don’t think running around the trees will do it for you. How about we put up the cleaning stuff for the time being and head to the grocery store? I’ve been putting off my big trip and I could use a hand pushing the second cart.”
She looked up at his earnest face. He really didn’t think she was crazy, and like he said, he understood what she needed. She’d never had such deep understanding between her and another person before. Her grandma had expected her to pull her weight and do good things. She’d needed her to be a good girl and because it was in her nature, Lucy never had a problem with those expectations. Brad, while they’d been dating and during their brief marriage, had attempted to take care of her on occasion. It had been hard for her to let him, but he’d tried and she’d thought it was incredible.
Scott, though, he seemed to recognize the line she walked when it came to helping others. She’d rather serve than be served, yet she needed a break and she needed help. He was giving her an out without making her feel like she was going against her nature.
“You can pick out the tea and stuff you like since I know you don’t like what I picked out last time.”
“What you chose is just fine.” She stopped herself when he raised his eyebrow. Darn werewolf nose, he could smell her fib. “Okay, maybe it’s not my favorite, but the thought in this case went a very long way.”
“So you’ll come with me and help me get the thought and action in line?”
Lucy looked around. She really didn’t want to finish scrubbing the clean floor and the curtains were already ironed and weren’t going anywhere.
“I’ll even throw in a milkshake,” he said.
She was sold and he must have known it because he smiled. She leaned forward and kissed him lightly on his upturned lips. “Okay, handsome. I’ll help with the shopping and we can put the curtains up when we get back.”
He nodded. “Sounds great. Let’s go.”
* * * *
The clerks always gave him looks when he shopped, but Scott had stopped caring about those years ago. Lucy didn’t seem to mind either. She’d told him about her experience buying groceries in bulk with her grandmother, so carts filled to overflowing were nothing new to her. He didn’t have a list because they pretty much needed everything besides beef—that, he bought by the half-cow from the butcher. But in the last few weeks, with him being hurt first and then Lucy being over, they’d gone through a lot of food. He liked how she didn’t bat an eyelash when he asked her to grab five tubs of oats.
“Planning on making more cookies?” she asked, the teasing quality of her voice the stuff he’d hoped to hear with a change of location.
“Maybe some oatmeal raisin ones,” he said. “That actually sounds really good. Now, what kind of cereal do you like? I know corn flakes aren’t your favorite.”
“Oh, you don’t have to get anything special for me,” she replied. “I’m happy to eat whatever you and the kids eat.”
He hated when she did that. There was a lot to be said about being selfless, but there was no damn reason for her to feel like she couldn’t have a say. He wanted her to pick stuff out and make a mark on his home. It wouldn’t be easy for her, not with her ever-giving nature. He didn’t necessarily want to try to change her, but he was pretty sure he could help her see the difference between being giving and not ever choosing.
“How about the marshmallow things?” He plucked a box from the plethora of possibilities.
“Those are fine,” she replied with a bright smile.
“Do you like them?”
She rolled her eyes. “Come on, Scott. I know you probably need to grab ten boxes to make it through the week, just pick what you like and I’ll nibble if I’m at the house.”
“But I want to have exactly what you want and how do I know if you don’t tell me?” he countered. “Unless I buy one of each kind and sit you down and have you try each and make notes, I could make the tea blunder again and that would be unacceptable. I’ll buy them all unless you speak up, Lucy.”
“You’re being silly.”
He shrugged and started grabbing boxes. “That’s part of being mates, sweetheart. You know that need you have to take care of every person you meet? Well, when it comes to wolves and their mates and pups, that feeling is quadrupled. We can do this the easy way or the hard way.”
“It’s cereal, you crazy man. It doesn’t matter what I like.”
“Everything you like matters.”
She didn’t say anything for a long moment and Scott used the quiet to continue filling his cart with cereal. If she doubted his sincerity, she was soon going to learn that when it came to her, there was no limit on how far he was willing to go to make her everyday life good. Maybe if he and Tiffany had started their mating bending over backward for each other instead of bending each other over every flat surface they could find, he would have noticed the change in her and recognized her need for help.
“I think this is really silly, but since you’re insisting on being weird, I like the kind with graham crackers.”
Progress. Sweet, sweet progress. Scott put the box of bran something back on the shelf and took down a big box of the cereal she preferred. “This one?”
“Yes, I like that one,” she said. “I can even use it to make bars. They are the only thing in my recipe collection anywhere near edible.”
“Then I’ll get two.”
She helped him pick out several other kinds of breakfast goodies but before they headed to the next aisle, she blocked his cart with hers. The store was relatively quiet, the lull before the post-workday shopping storm Scott’s favorite time to shop. Lucy’s eyes narrowed and though she didn’t smell angry or suspicious, she sure looked at least the latter.
“I know what you’re doing.”
He wasn’t busted yet. “Oh? What’s that?”
“You’re trying to butter me up for all the mate stuff,” she said. “I’m only telling you this once—I don’t need the special handling or whatever this is. I want you to treat me now like you plan to treat me in ten years if we’re still together. Dating was always a turn-off for me because I always felt like the other person was wearing a mask of some kind—putting on a front until they got to know me better. I don’t do that and I don’t want you to either, Scott.”
She had thought about dating, just hadn’t liked it. Which meant her spending time with him was doubly special. They had
something, he knew it, she knew it and now they had to line up all their shared knowledge into something worth being too overcome with passion to discuss rationally.
A woman turned the corner in front of them, forcing Lucy and Scott to move their carts. Not any woman, Scott noticed immediately, a shewolf. The female perked up at the sight and scent of him and though Scott hoped she’d keep walking, he knew that wasn’t the werewolf way. She sauntered closer, the intense sexuality of an unmated female something she couldn’t tamp down and this one didn’t even try.
Where a human would have hurried by with her shopping list in mind, the shewolf stopped in front of Scott, separating him from Lucy. She at least attempted to look casual, reaching for a box of granola bars behind him to catch a better scent. Scott saw the look on Lucy’s face and she was far from impressed.
Good.
“Excuse me?” Lucy demanded, not nearly the retiring flower Scott saw most days. “We’re having a conversation here. If you want to get something, we’ll move, but you need to back away from my boyfriend right now.”
Boyfriend. The day just kept getting better.
The shewolf rolled her eyes so Scott could see. He made it very clear he had no interest in walking away from his human in favor of a quick screw with a wolf, even if she was good-looking.
“Fine.” The shewolf shrugged, but winked at the last moment, a continued invitation should he choose to indulge.
The East Coast had some bloodline problems and was always looking for new wolves. It was part of the reason Chris Meyters hadn’t booted him from the area. Finding someone who smelled right was something most single wolves strived for and he couldn’t exactly blame her for the lingering offer. He wouldn’t fault her, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to follow her either.
“She’s a werewolf, isn’t she?”
Scott froze and, though the shewolf was halfway down aisle, she too stopped in her tracks. Not wanting to indulge in a bitchfight in the cereal aisle where humans milled nearby, Scott hustled Lucy out of sight from the shewolf.
“Ah, yeah, she’s a werewolf,” Scott confirmed, keeping his voice low. “What tipped you off?”
Lucy shot an ugly look toward the aisle they’d come from. “I don’t know. Something about her just…and what a slut. Are all werewolf women sluts? Because that one is a slut and needs to be smacked.”
Scott grabbed pudding cups and fruit snacks quickly, hoping to put as much distance between Lucy and the werewolf as possible. He didn’t think the female would attack in a grocery store, but he wasn’t willing to bet on it. And the slut stuff, where was that coming from? Usually his Lucy had the sweetest mouth on her. Now she looked absolutely pissed and though he was flattered, he figured he had to be missing something.
“Maybe go easy on the slut stuff, honey. She wasn’t being forward or anything as far as Weres go. Weres and humans don’t usually hook up, so she might have assumed we were friends or something.”
“Oh, so you’re saying Jessie wasn’t right about us already smelling like mates?” Lucy demanded, maybe too firmly.
Then it hit him: she was worried and instead of retreating this time like she usually did, letting worry fester, she’d gone on the offensive. It was pretty awesome that she’d chosen to fight for him, but in regard to his fidelity, he didn’t want her to worry—not ever. He abandoned his cart beside the soup mixes and stepped closer than was grocery store-appropriate and wrapped his arms around Lucy’s waist. She’d had a lot of change, indecision and uncertainty in her life lately. He wasn’t going to add to it.
“We do smell like a pair working their way up to a mating,” he said, rubbing his nose to hers, though she remained stiff in his arms. “However, there’s a big difference between ‘mated’ and ‘working our way to it’ for some Weres. Not for me, no, ma’am, I’d never lead you on without full intentions of following through, but that other gal, she didn’t know.”
“Do I need to tattoo something on your forehead for her and the other werewolves to see we’re together?”
He bit back a grin. He loved seeing her so territorial. Tiffany had always taken his fidelity for granted. He’d done the same with her, but Lucy once again showed she was different.
“Do you trust me, baby?”
He wanted her to mark her space, as long as that was all it was—marking and not insecurity.
She sighed and finally rubbed her nose to his, brushing her lips across his. “It’s not about trust, Scott. I know what kind of man you are. It’s the whole werewolf society, I guess. I don’t know what to expect or what’s normal and I apologize if I overreacted.”
He kissed her, easing his tongue between her lips for a moment of more than innocent and reassuring affection. “I’ll try to be better about explaining to you, so you don’t feel threatened again. Lucy, you’re it for me. There’s no one else, Were or human, I’d rather make out in the grocery store with. I’m happy as hell to wait on other aspects of our relationship because I know you need more time to really know me and us. Once that comes together, the scents really do completely change.”
“Oh.”
She sounded let down and he hoped she didn’t think he was pushing her into giving more than she was ready for. They were right where they needed to be in their courtship. When the rest came together, they’d be explosive. He wasn’t willing to rush their moment for anything.
“How about for the time being we forgo matching forehead tattoos and trust each other, okay? Maybe in a few months, we could get some matching jewelry or something,” he offered.
Weddings mattered to humans. To wolves, not so much, but he figured rings would be reassuring to Lucy and he didn’t mind wearing one for her. It would be nice to have all the bases covered—sight and scents—to keep others away.
“Eventually,” she said and kissed his nose. “In the meantime, talk me down before I do something horrid like attack an innocent werewolf in the cereal aisle.”
He laughed and gave her one last kiss when he realized they were attracting a crowd getting more than an eyeful of baking products.
“Sounds good. Be a nice little human the rest of the trip and I’ll still buy you your milkshake.”
She smiled and, back to the practical woman she usually was, started loading up her cart with pudding. Scott returned to his cart and followed her, sure he’d taken the right step in his future.
* * * *
Lucy sighed and wished she’d stayed at Scott’s house instead of returning to her apartment, but after the whole ‘slut’ incident, she’d been embarrassed. He hadn’t teased her or anything. Still, she’d overreacted. Tracing her finger around the rim of her wineglass, she wondered what it was about him that made her act like, well, an animal at moments.
She never insulted people, let alone to their faces or so venomously. There was never a reason for such ugly behavior and she’d honestly believed that for nearly every moment of her life. In fact, she hadn’t indulged in something so childish since she was a hormonal, angry teenager and even those incidents had been tame compared to her behavior at the store.
The difference was Scott. She’d seen that woman, all tall and skinny and darkly beautiful, lean toward him and she’d seen red. In her mind, she’d already put her stamp on him. The whole mating issue had seemed to her like an automatic branding. Being wrong had been a shock.
She’d overestimated what it all meant. After Scott had explained it more, she’d seen that while the relationship felt like more to her and obviously meant more to him, the outward signs weren’t precisely clear to others.
How much easier would it have been if things had been a done deal? Did she really want life to be simple? She sighed again and propped her feet on the chair across from her. Maybe she did want what she had with Scott to be easy. Nothing else in her life seemed to ever take that label. Being with him and loving him had become effortless. For how complicated their relationship should have been, with his kids and her own history, the ease was something she�
��d taken for granted or maybe attributed to the ‘mate’ explanation.
Scott had cleared up the misunderstanding, though. Being mates didn’t make life easier—it just meant they were chemically aligned to be fertile together. After Scott explained, she’d realized something very big—she’d been attributing too much to the mating and not nearly enough to the wonderful man. She tried not to over-think what it all meant. Scott had in fact told her outright not to do that before she left, but it was impossible.
The revelation of her affection for Scott made her sad for the way she’d been with Brad. They’d been happy enough. In retrospect, she wondered where they would be if he were still alive. He’d died before they’d ever really gotten into the meat and bones of their marriage. She’d loved him, but she wasn’t sure if they’d have lasted. He’d been a kind man. She took a sip of her wine, also very sweet, and smiled. Brad had sent her twenty dozen flowers in their thirty-six months together. When there hadn’t been flowers, there had been candy and cards just because he was thinking of her. It had been her first taste of being spoiled.
At first she’d been uncomfortable and discouraged him, but during their time dating and after his deployment, the little trinkets and pretty gifts had continued. She smiled again at the memory of daisies showing up at their apartment. Maybe they would have been okay in the long term. Brad had displayed more of a backbone than she’d realized before they married and his strength had shown in small ways. Small, adorable, endearing ways.
It had been too long since she’d really thought about Brad objectively. The anniversary of his death had been a time to remember and place flowers on his grave. Now, she could think about the good times too and they had shared those wonderful moments—moments he’d made by encouraging her to let go and enjoy life.
Maybe, just maybe, she wasn’t as bad as she’d thought when it came to relationships. Perhaps she was a natural when she found the right man to love. Maybe…maybe she needed to put the wine away and go to bed.
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