“I’m afraid not.”
“She’s a pretty girl. A little chubby.” He waits for Egitto to shake his head no again. “Anyway, she sits with Angelo and reads him books. She doesn’t care whether he understands or not, she goes on reading.” He toys with a strand of hair falling over his forehead, leaving it sticking straight up on his head for a second. “How long has it been since you’ve seen him?”
“More than a year.”
Since October two years ago, to be precise, since Torsu’s body, wrapped in a silver thermal blanket, was taken up into the sky and on board a Black Hawk with machine guns on both sides. But he can’t bring himself to admit that to the pacifist.
“Then you’ll find he’s changed a lot, Mr. . . . ?”
“Egitto. Alessandro.”
The young man’s face darkens. He studies him for a few seconds, as if he’s made a connection. Maybe he knows all about it. Egitto prepares himself for his reaction. “Are you a soldier too?”
“I’m a doctor.”
“And those burns, how did you get them?”
So, a misunderstanding. Egitto smiles at him, anticipating the apologies he imagines will soon be delivered. He touches his face. “No, these have nothing to do with it.”
The young man is visibly curious, but too polite to insist. “Tell me one thing, Doctor,” he asks instead. “How did Angelo manage to disappear like that?”
“Disappear?”
“He . . . went away. As if he had made up his mind to. At least that’s what I think. He’s hiding away somewhere and doesn’t want to come out anymore. How can that be, Doctor?”
All of a sudden Egitto feels tired, exhausted from the trip. “I don’t know,” he says.
The volunteer shakes his head. People expect a doctor to provide all the answers. “Anyway, the Lord knows where he is.”
Then they go on waiting, in silence, until the hands of the clock mark four on the dot. The young man snaps his fingers. “It’s time. I’ll go wake him.”
He returns after a few minutes, holding Angelo Torsu by the elbow, not as if he had to support him, more as if to guide him. Egitto wonders if the slight movement of the soldier’s lips is an attempt to welcome him, a smile maybe, but he realizes that he keeps doing it. The lieutenant stands up, straightening his jacket, and takes Torsu’s hand to shake it.
“Bring him near the window,” the volunteer suggests. “He likes to look out. Right, Angelo?”
Egitto isn’t capable of conversing with someone who doesn’t respond; he feels too awkward. The same thing happens to him at gravesides, especially Ernesto’s; it also happens with newborns and even with patients groggy from anesthesia. And though no one is observing him with Angelo Torsu now in the bare living room—the volunteer has withdrawn to the kitchen to leave them alone—he’s unable to utter a word. So they remain silent. They simply stand there, side by side, in front of the window.
An army badge is pinned to the corporal major’s robe. A fellow soldier must have brought it to him who knows how long ago; then no one bothered to take it off. Egitto wonders if he likes it. More likely he’s completely indifferent to it. We take it for granted that a person who doesn’t say otherwise is grateful for any tie with his past life, and for our attention, that he wants to go over to the window just because we decide to take him there, but we don’t really know that. Maybe Torsu just wants to sit in his room in peace, by himself.
He can still see. Or at least his pupils contract when the light grows more intense. It’s the overly smooth skin of his cheeks and neck that make his face incongruous. They took a flap of skin from his backside and grafted it onto his face. A miracle of modern surgery—an abomination. Torsu’s body functions, but as if it were uninhabited now. He incessantly chews something between his teeth that isn’t there, like a piece of tough meat: the words that for months he hasn’t been able to pronounce. Other than that he seems tranquil, watching the street where cars rarely pass by. The Lord knows where he is. Someone has to know.
Egitto stays for what seems like an appropriate amount of time. He has the impression that his breathing and Torsu’s are now in sync. He doesn’t know if one of them has followed the other or if they reached that synchronicity together. When the absurdity of being in that house becomes unbearable, Egitto picks up the bag he brought with him. He takes out a wrapped rectangular box and hands it to the soldier. When he doesn’t take it, Egitto balances it on the windowsill. “They’re jelly beans,” he says. “There was a period when they were all I could eat. I hope you like them too.” He studies Torsu’s face, looking for a sign. The soldier ruminates, absent. Maybe he should tear off the paper, take a jelly bean, and make him taste it. Better to let the volunteer do it, though. “I’ll take you back to your room. You must be tired.”
He won’t come back a second time. What he’ll do, for a few years, will be to send the corporal major a box of candy identical to this one for Christmas, along with a brief note of greeting, until they’re returned to him with a nondelivery notice from the post office; then he won’t attempt to find out the new address. That, along with a portion of his salary, will be the only remaining bond with the man he sentenced to death, the man whose life he saved. He’ll let time act on his remorse, slowly wearing it down.
• • •
After the four-month suspension the day comes for him to resume service. He’s a little nervous as he takes the street leading uphill to the barracks of the Seventh Alpine Regiment. The first day of high school, his thesis defense before graduation, the Hippocratic oath: it’s that kind of agitation, which bewilders and revitalizes him. Emotion would be a more fitting term than agitation, but he still uses that word with restraint.
He stops for a moment, just before his armpits start to perspire. He looks up at the gray massif of the Schiara. The clouds are huddled around the peak, as if they were conferring. Whereas in Torino the mountains were a distant border that emerged and vanished depending on the smog, whereas in Gulistan they were a forbidding wall, here in Belluno he could reach out and touch them.
The soldier at the guardhouse raises his hand in salute and remains stock-still as the lieutenant walks by him. Egitto is escorted to his new office on the first floor of the main building. Someone in the room next door is talking on the phone with a marked Trentino accent, laughing often. Egitto goes to the window overlooking the parade ground, which is surrounded by poplars. It’s a good location; he’ll like it here.
“Lieutenant?”
An NCO stands in the doorway uncertainly, looking like he’s about to knock. Who knows why he hasn’t and why he’s called to him instead. “Yes, Corporal?”
“Welcome, sir. The commander has asked for you. Would you please follow me?”
Egitto picks up his hat, which he’d placed on the table, and adjusts it slantwise on his head. They go up two floors, then halfway down a hall. Here the corporal stops in front of an open door. “He’s in here,” he says, motioning for Egitto to enter.
Colonel Giacomo Ballesio puts down the sandwich that he was clenching with both hands. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, then leaps up, bumping the edge of the desk with his belt buckle—the lamp teeters and a pen rolls to the floor. Ballesio pays no attention to that little mishap. He throws his arms open, joyfully. “Lieutenant Egitto, finally! Come in, come in. Sit down. Let’s talk.”
Translator’s Note
The military rankings used in the novel are English translations of the Italian ranks, which differ from NATO equivalents. For example, many of the soldiers bear the rank of caporalmaggiore, corporal major or simply corporal, as opposed to NATO’s private first class or simply private. Other examples are marshal (maresciallo) versus NATO’s master sergeant, or first corporal major (primo caporalmaggiore) versus NATO’s lance corporal.
The genio is the Corps of Engineers, the unit responsible for military civil engineering
projects (fortifications, trenches, etc.) as well as explosives detection. The bomb disposal unit is part of the genio.
Little Trees or Arbre Magique are disposable air fresheners in the shape of a stylized evergreen tree, marketed for use in cars. They are made of a material very similar to beer coasters and are produced in a variety of colors and scents.
The Lince is an armored four-wheel drive tactical vehicle produced by Iveco and adopted by the Italian Army. It is similar to a Humvee.
When Second Lieutenant Puglisi provokes a fight at the latrines by trying to get ahead of Corporal Major Di Salvo, he warns the corporal not to mess with him because he’s from Catania. Di Salvo, undaunted, retorts that he’s from Lamezia. Catania is in Sicily, Lamezia Terme in Calabria.
The third of Franz Liszt’s Three Concert Études is usually known as Un sospiro, Italian for “A sigh.”
The Croma, the car Egitto’s family affectionately nicknamed La Musona, is a sedan produced by Fiat. The first model appeared in 1985.
The expression luna mendax (lying moon) is a counterintuitive Latin mnemonic for remembering whether the moon is waxing or waning: When the moon looks like a D (fuller on the right), it’s growing, luna crescens (you’d logically expect it to look like a C); when it looks like a C (fuller on the left), it’s diminishing, luna decrescens (you’d expect it to look like a D).
Dari is the variety of Persian spoken in Afghanistan, where, along with Pashto, it is one of two official languages. Also known as Afghan Persian, Dari is mutually intelligible with Persian (Farsi) of Iran.
The Red Zone, outside the security bubble, is a term loosely applied to all unsecured areas beyond the range of a military post.
A hecatomb describes any immense slaughter. In ancient Greece and Rome, it referred to a public sacrifice offered to the gods, consisting of a hundred oxen.
The Schiara is a mountain in the Dolomites in northern Italy, near the town of Belluno.
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