by Lola Stark
Fuck, I wanted her but I knew I wouldn’t have her.
She stopped in the middle of the bar and swung around to where I was seated. Her eyes found mine, and in that second, the world around us disappeared. Her eyes dropped from mine as she rushed behind the bar and began speaking with Rach.
Rach looked over at me quickly. I looked everywhere but behind the bar. I was here to drink and drink I would. One beer led to two, which led to five and a nice buzz was overwhelming my exhausted body. It was about the time when I found myself staring at Amelia once again that Austin had slid in opposite me and sat there with a king-sized grin spreading over his face.
“And what are you smirking at?”
“You’re fucking her without even touching her. Why don’t you just talk to her? Make up with her?” His face suddenly grew serious, his eyes narrowing into mine. “D, I need my brother back. I can’t fucking do this work by myself. You have never had days off work, but in the last three weeks, you’ve barely done a week’s work. Gramps didn’t leave the farm to you to run it in the ground.”
It was a brutal kick in the teeth; the kind of truth I needed to hear. It was true. I had let the farm down and if it wasn’t for Austin and Brax picking up my slack, it wouldn’t be running. My newfound love of drinking had created the demon known as epic hangovers, which meant the alarm at four am was always slept through. I was letting down my family, one thing I had promised myself I’d never do.
“Can I get you anything, Austin?”
My head shot up at the sound of her voice, and there she stood. Looking almost nervous, her voice slightly weak, her eyes focused on Austin, refusing to look at me. I watched her closely, drinking her in, enjoying the sweet smell of her perfume.
“I’m just here to pick up Destry and take him home,” Austin said quickly with a nod towards me. I slid out of the booth and stood beside her, towering over her. She didn’t move. My eyes narrowed in at her, knowing that the amount of unfinished business between us was growing by the day, and to be honest, I was afraid of what would happen when it came to the surface.
“I’m not standing here, then?” I asked with a slight slur. “You’re supposed to serve all the paying patrons.” I slapped a twenty on the table. “And I’m paying,” I said with sarcasm.
“What you’re doing is turning into a drunk asshole,” she sneered at me. “One who’s about thirty seconds away from being thrown out on his sorry ass.”
She turned to Austin who was trying to hold in his snicker. “Sorry, honey. You’ll have to take asshat home.”
“How cute, you two are just so damn sweet my teeth are gonna fall out,” I jibbed, trying to hide the hurt at them being so buddy-buddy.
“Your teeth are going to fall out after somebody is smart enough to knock some sense into you.” She looked up at me with what could only be described as disgust. That one look tore me apart. “Pull your head out of your ass, Destry. And grow the fuck up.” With that, she nodded at Austin and stormed away.
“Not a word,” I growled at my brother, knowing he wouldn’t be able to help himself.
“You just got bitch slapped,” he guffawed with a smug look on his face.
“Screw you,” I threw back at him. There wasn’t much I could say after that ego-breaking blow. I couldn’t seem to help myself of late. I’d turned into a drunken fool with a bad attitude, and I didn’t like it one freaking bit. Ultimately, it was that look she’d given me, the one that shone in her eyes when she’d acknowledged me just now. She was absolutely disgusted in me, and that hurt my heart more than any of the words we’d thrown at each other. I slunk out of the bar without another word to anyone and climbed in to Austin’s truck. The entire ride home was a sad kind of silence that neither he nor I were willing to break. This was it, this was the point I needed to get my head together and either let her go, or fight for her. Only thing was, I didn’t know if we’d done too much damage to repair.
X X X
My worst nightmare was coming true. Ellie was hysterical, had locked herself in her bedroom and was refusing to come out. The boys and I had been sitting on the porch chatting about the day when Ellie turned up with a screech of wheels and a look of thunder flooding her pretty face. She stormed past us without a word, slamming doors as she went; she was still in her room while I paced the hall.
“Ellie bug, can I come in?” I asked gently, rapping on the door with my knuckles.
“No!” she yelled. I looked back at my brothers who were both at a loss. She was bawling her eyes out and I didn’t have a clue what to do. “I need Amelia! Someone call, Amelia!” she hollered with a hiccup.
I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the white bedroom door. “Ellie, talk to us,” I pleaded. The last thing I wanted to do was call Amelia. I needed time to form a plan before I saw her again.
“Well, tell me which one of you want to come in here while I talk about the guy I’ve just spent the night with? Yeah, boys, your little sister had sex,” she sobbed. I went ramrod straight at that and the tension in the air turned to pure fury.
“Somebody needs an ass kicking,” Austin growled. I turned around and shot looks at the boys. Hoping one of them would call Amelia for me. I didn’t know what to say just yet.
Austin was too busy clenching his fists and letting the steam come out of his ears to help, so I raised an eyebrow at Braxton. He nodded and pulled his cell out to make the call.
Within ten minutes, the sound of wheels crunching on gravel filled the house and suddenly the front door flew open and I heard her voice. “Ellie, Brax?”
“Up here,” Brax replied quickly.
Amelia flew up the stairs, wide-eyed and frantic. My eyes ran the length of her body; she was wearing skintight sweat pants that showed off every delicious curve of her sweet body, and a tank top, which sat just short enough for me to glimpse at her toned stomach.
Fuck it.
Her eyes finally found mine as she stood before the three of us. The tension swirling around us and I knew it was because of my stubborn ass.
“Thank you for doing this,” I said quickly, my eyes darting from hers to the closed door of Ellie’s room.
“I’m not doing this for you, Destry, so no need for the thanks.”
Without another look in my direction, I noticed the fierce eyes she had thrown me moments ago softened when she looked at Brax and Austin before she opened the door and walked through, slamming it after her.
“You royally screwed that up,” Brax said with a huff as he walked off and disappeared down the staircase.
“She lied. She was cheating,” I pointed out to the only other person left in the room.
“No. She didn’t. You were just too hard headed to hear her out.” Austin shook his head and walked off in the same direction as Brax, leaving me to follow after them with Austin’s words swimming around in my head. I wasn’t at all surprised Austin knew the details considering the friendship that had developed between him and Amelia. I knew that he and Brax had been helping her set up the home she had bought outside of town. Knowing that she was staying around excited me, but I’d never show it.
I heard the screen door slam and knew where to find my brothers. What else was there to do besides sit around and wait impatiently for either Amelia or Ellie to resurface and set our minds at ease? Collapsing on the wooden bench beside Brax, he handed me a beer, which I took with a nod of thanks. The Texas air was still warm and the haze of a hot summer day still lingered. I wouldn’t live anywhere else. This was home and this was where my family became what it was today.
“I am not happy about this whole boy business with Ellie,” I muttered under my breath. Ellie would always be my little girl. Us boys raised her from when she was tiny. I felt like a protective big brother, but also a concerned father when it came to her.
“Does anyone else still think she is like five years old?” Brax asked with a smirk.
Austin grunted in reply, “Yep, so this is freaking me the fuck out.”
&
nbsp; “I still remember her first steps and her first words,” I said nostalgically. “And when she broke her arm. She was lucky she was the baby of the house. Remember her demands?” We all laughed as memories flooded us before the reality of being orphans hit us and silence fell amongst us.
Being the oldest, I always felt a sense of responsibility being forced on me. I was so young when Mom died, and then when Dad passed, I had to take on the role of man of the house. I could have either gone down two paths. I could have completely let it destroy me or I could have stood up and been the man the three most important people in my life needed.
“You did right by us, Destry. Don’t think any other way,” Austin said softly, picking up on the thoughts swamping me.
“I hope so.”
My head whipped around when I heard the screen door close. Amelia walked towards us and leaned down to kiss Austin on the cheek, and then repeated the action with Braxton. Her eyes never met mine. She quickly said goodbye to them and walked off down the steps. I couldn’t take it anymore. I was going to fix this.
“Amelia, wait!” I called and went after her.
I grabbed her arm to stop her, but she instantly ripped out of my hold and spat, “Don’t touch me.” Her words were a big slap in the face. Not long ago, she was crying out for my hands on her, now she was that hurt by me, she couldn’t stand it.
“I just want to know what is going on,” I told her honestly. Only I didn’t just want to know what was wrong with Ellie, I wanted to know about her. Amelia turned and kept walking. I ran my hands through my hair and yelled out, “Amelia, stop! Talk to me.”
She pulled up to a stop between the barn door and her car. She spun around to face me with something close to a snarl, “Oh, so now I’m good enough? You’ve decided you’re talking to me, now?”
“I— I mean. I just— it’s not like that, Amelia. You hurt me,” I stuttered. She unnerved me. Threw me of balance… she brought me undone. I caught movement from the corner of my eye when the boys got up and went inside to give us some privacy.
“Oh, it’s not? You’re the one who wouldn’t give me the time of day to explain to you what had happened. You made your mind up about me before you let me get a word in,” she roared at me. I stood stock still, stunned at the way she’d just completely blown her top.
“You had a fiancé,” I pointed out. That was all I had; I was a ball of mixed emotion.
“If you’d bothered to give me the time of day or a Goddamn second to explain to you, you’d know I had left him! When I crashed my car, I was driving as far away from him as I could get after I walked in on my ‘fiancé’ and my sister fucking each other’s brains out on my Goddamn sheets!” she screamed at me. Her breathing had picked up from pure anger and frustration.
“Fuck!” I cursed. I was such a fucking tool. She wasn’t cheating on me. My Goddamn ego had gotten in the way. I had screwed this up in the most epic way possible. “I’m sorry. I was hurt and I didn’t want… I don’t know what I wanted. I just know I didn’t want you to be able to hurt me like that.”
She gritted her teeth and glared at me, “You’re just like every other cocky cowboy I’ve ever met. Ignorant, full of shit and fucking blind. I was in love with you, but you couldn’t even see it.” She took a deep breath and my heart stopped.
She was in love with me? Holy fuck! She was in love with me. My heart started racing behind my ribs and I took a step toward her backing her up against the barn wall.
“Now, leave me be. Get back on your high fucking horse and ride off into the sunset. I’ll find my own freaking happily ever after.” Her words said one thing but her body said a whole other. She hadn’t been wearing a bra, and despite the warm breeze, her nipples were clearly hard. Her breathing was coming in fast bursts, making her chest rise and fall, drawing my attention to the pink flush of heat that was slowly traveling up her neck.
“You’re in love with me?” I asked, wanting to hear her say it again.
“Don’t be smart. It’s not cute,” she grouched.
“Amelia,” I asked seriously. “Are you in love with me?” I stepped a little closer, barely leaving a millimeter between us. My dick was now so hard I could hammer nails and her hands were clenched into fists beside her. She was either going to deck me, or she was trying not to touch me. I’d take either or both, so long as I knew the truth.
“Yes, I love you, you idiot!” Without a second thought, I closed the gap between us and pinned her flush against the wall, crashing my mouth down on hers. I kissed the ever-loving breath out of both of us. Her hands came up to my chest and rather than pushing me away, she fisted my shirt and pulled me impossibly closer. I brought my hands up to the wall either side of her head; she made a sexy little sound in the back of her throat, which broke my tightly reigned in composure. I growled into her mouth and moved my hands down, picking her up under her luscious ass. Her legs came up and wrapped around my waist effortlessly as I stumbled through the barn doors in a frenzy of tongues, teeth and lips. God, I’d missed the taste of her cherry flavored lips.
The moment I had her inside, I pushed us against the barn door and let lose. My hands were everywhere on her, unable to get my fill. I pulled her tiny tank off, causing us to pull away for a second. “I need you, ‘Melia.” I groaned when she pulled at the top button of my jeans.
She looked up from my crotch through hooded, lust-filled eyes and pulled my head down to her mouth. “You’ve got no idea,” she breathed against my lips, nipping my chin slightly as she peppered small kisses along my jaw. Reaching up, she pulled my shirt up and over my head. Dropping it behind us, she trailed her delicate fingers down my chest painfully slow. My dick started to throb with need when she stopped at my partly opened jeans and looked back up at me licking her lips.
“‘Melia,” I growled when she dropped to her knees, pulled down the zipper, and then tugged them part way down my thighs. My cock strained toward her thanks to my lack of boxer briefs. Without any hesitation, she took me fully into her mouth. My head spun and I reached out for the wall in front of me to stop from falling to the ground at the intense pleasure rushing over me. One of my hands landed on her head, as she started moving back and forth, the occasional hum from her throat running right to my spine.
“Holy fuck,” I groaned when she swallowed, taking me right to the back of her throat. My knees locked up when she did it again. I was so close to losing it down her throat; I grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her up. “You’re gonna make me blow, darlin’,” I explained and stepped out of my boots and jeans while tearing her yoga pant things off her and throwing them somewhere to the side.
I pulled one of the thick picnic blankets down from the shelves beside us and flicked it out before laying her down, tracing over her body with my tongue, teeth and hands. Not an inch of her body was untouched. Writhing under me, she cried out when I lined myself up and rubbed the head of my cock against her sensitive clit. “Destry, please,” she begged, moving her hips in an effort to hurry me up.
I took a shuddering breath and planted myself balls deep. Amelia arched her back, her eyes rolling back in her head while she moaned long and loud. The sound of my own groans echoed around us. I pulled my hips back until I was almost completely unsheathed and pushed back in recreating that feeling over and over, until I couldn’t go slow any longer. I picked up my pace and pounded into her, both of us calling out as we neared the end of the tether. She bit down on my shoulder as she screamed out. Dragging me down with her, our sweat slicked bodies moved together. I moved my hips faster when the all too familiar tingle started up my spine and my balls drew up tight. “Fucking hell, “I cursed loudly and came deep inside her with a roar.
Before I could collapse on top of her, I rolled to the side dragging her with me, where I tucked her up beside me and we caught our breaths. I needed to make my feeling clear, lay it all out for her. I ran my hand slowly in circles across her lower back, relishing in the feeling of her skin against mine. Knowing I’d be
en damn close to losing the best thing that’d crashed into my life, I held her tightly, unwilling to let her go.
“So we just officially christened the barn,” my voice was deep and content. I had been searching years for this exact moment. I still held her in my arms, her breathing echoing out of her chest after what was possibly the craziest, intense sex session I’d had.
“Well, I didn’t think that would be happening when I turned up.” She buried her face in my chest and I closed my eyes under the intense feelings swarming me.
“I love you, ‘Melia. I knew there was something about you the moment I saw you, but I was a stubborn ass. I want you in my life; I want you and all your past. I promise I won’t be so reactive in the future. The past few weeks have been hell without you.”
“You’re all I have now, Destry. You’re all I want,” she told me quietly.
“What do you mean, ‘I’m all you have, darlin’?” I asked, slightly confused.
“I left them… my family. You don’t understand the life I was stuck in before I met you. Always told what to wear and how to act, told who I was supposed to marry. My parents expected me to stay with my bastard ex-finance and be the perfect Stepford Wife, even after he slept with my sister and got her pregnant,” she rushed out.
Anger at the way she’d been treated and how she’d been brought up spread through me. I sucked in a breath. “Are you fuckin’ kidding me?”
“No. I told them to go to hell and they cut me off. I want nothing to do with those toxic people. You’re it for me. You’re my everything. You, Brax, Austin and Ellie, you’re my family now.”
I caressed her back and took a moment for the anger to dissipate. “You’re my everything too, darlin’ and you’re perfect the way you are. Those people never deserved you. Maybe I don’t either, but I’ll spend every waking moment making sure you know how special you are.” I dropped a kiss on her forehead and ran my hand in lazy circles on her back. “I’ll never let anyone make you feel that way ever again. There’s not a goddamn thing about you that I don’t love, ‘Melia. I was wrong about you being a city girl. This is where you belong. You’re a country girl through and through. You fit here, darlin’. You fit me.”
