“Like I had a choice,” I replied. “Thandi can’t leave me locked up forever.” I kept my voice steady. I had to put up a wall she couldn’t crack.
“I’ve missed you so much.” Denna’s hands trembled, and she clutched her skirts to steady them. “These past days have been terrible. I wanted to come to you, but Thandi hasn’t allowed me to leave his side.”
“This is all my fault,” I said. “I never should have said anything about how I felt. I should never have stayed with you that night.” It hurt to say the words, but no other choice remained.
“But I’m glad. I wouldn’t trade the past few moons for anything.” She touched my forearm.
I pulled away. “Yes, you would. Your duty.” I pointed to the ornate tiara atop her head.
Her face fell. “Serving the kingdom as a monarch is the only thing I know how to do. It’s the only way I have power to help stop the war,” she said. “But I want to find a way to make things work for us. I want to make you happy. And I can’t bear the idea of going on without you. Tell me what I have to do to change your mind.”
“There’s nothing you can do,” I said. “I can’t stay. Thandi and the Directorate have forced me onto this path, and I’ve accepted Endalan’s proposal. Isn’t it what you would do? Do your duty and go along with what everyone else has planned?”
“That’s different,” she said. “You know as well as I do that the Recusants hold only part of the responsibility for what happened. Going to war against another kingdom when we have no proof is foolish. There’s no strength in an alliance between Sonnenborne and Mynaria based on that. We don’t even know if Kriantz can hold enough tribes together to declare himself king, as he seems to be planning to do.”
She was right, but I didn’t want to admit it. I couldn’t agree with her because I couldn’t stay.
“Well, my brother’s being an idiot, but maybe I can change Endalan’s mind. He isn’t stupid. He might listen to someone he’s forming a partnership with,” I said.
“There’s no guarantee of that,” she insisted. “This war benefits him. He gains land. I don’t know if he can be trusted.”
“If he won’t listen, maybe I’ll take Flicker and go to Zumorda on my own. Try to warn them. Either way, it’s better than staying here and watching you marry my brother,” I said.
“But Thandi culled Flicker,” she blurted. “He’ll go out on the sale string tomorrow. I’ve been trying to figure out how to stop—”
“What?” I said. My warring emotions coalesced into a much simpler one: fury.
“Lord Kriantz was right there with me. He said Flicker wasn’t fit for desert life. If he cared about you, he should have stopped Thandi,” she said.
“They won’t get away with this.” I set my jaw and scowled across the room at my brother. Someone would pay. My punishment had been taken one step too far. No one was going to take my horse.
“But Mare—”
I shook my head and stood. At least Flicker’s culling presented a problem I could solve, unlike the disaster with Denna. I stormed across the room to Lord Kriantz and pulled him aside.
“You sold my horse,” I said flatly.
“Pardon?”
“Dennaleia told me that Flicker got culled yesterday.”
“I didn’t have any say in the culling, my lady. I don’t know what you heard, but I assure you I would not have encouraged His Majesty to sell your horse. He’s a nice gelding. I offered to take him, but His Majesty pointed out that I should keep my string limited to what I can use for my breeding program.”
Lies. Denna frustrated me, and disappointed me, but she had never lied.
“So things aren’t useful unless you can breed them? Is that how it is?” I raised my voice.
“My lady, please don’t cause a scene. I know you’re upset about the horse, but we can sort it out tomorrow. And you’ll have your choice of horses in Sonnenborne after we wed,” Lord Kriantz said.
“I don’t want a desert horse. I want my horse,” I said.
“This will soothe your nerves, my lady,” he said, and pressed a glass of wine into my hand and stepped over to take my other arm. “Let’s talk about this later.”
“There isn’t going to be a later,” I said. “I’ve changed my mind. I won’t marry you. Call it off.” I shook free of him and stalked toward my brother, who was deep in conversation with the Count of Nax.
Thandi saw me coming and turned his back. If he wanted to play it that way, I could join his game. I pitched the full glass of wine at him. Wine and glass shards exploded over his feet, bringing the conversation to a sudden halt.
“What in the Six Hells!” Thandi jumped back, glass crunching beneath the soles of his boots.
The crowd hushed around us, faces aghast.
I smiled.
“Your Majesty,” I began. “In case you forgot, I’m your sister, not some broodmare you can send off on a trading string. If selling my horse is your idea of a punishment, you can shove your plans up your royal ass. This is over. I’m done with war, I’m done with Lord Kriantz, and I am especially done with you.” I stared him down, every muscle in my body taut.
“If you’d done what was asked of you from the beginning, we wouldn’t be here now, Amaranthine,” he said, his voice level.
“Is that so? I happen to believe that everyone is a player in this game. I’m not taking responsibility for your failures. So if you want to wage war on a kingdom that you have no evidence actually did anything, enjoy that. I’m leaving. You can dig your grave by yourself.” I turned on my heel and shoved through the crowd. They quickly parted before me—all but one.
Denna stepped out in front of the exit of the great hall, blocking my way.
“That’s unwise, my lady,” I said. I needed to ride my anger straight out of the room, and she was the one person I did not want to hurt. Still, I faltered as I faced her, feeling the inexplicable pull that always begged me to close the distance between us.
“Don’t go,” she pleaded.
“I’m leaving,” I said. “But here’s something to remember me by.”
I gathered her into my arms and kissed her with the intensity she’d kissed me with that first time, hoping if I kissed her hard enough everything I felt for her could be left behind when I walked out of the room. She tasted sweet, a hint of spiced apple from dessert still on her lips. And in spite of my anger that she had chosen him instead of me, and even though I was about to walk away from her forever, the feel of her against me reminded me that what happened between us had been inevitable. I loved her. She made my heart race and my legs feel like they might give way. Every second she spent in my arms was sweeter than a song, lighter than air.
I didn’t stop to judge her reaction, just marched out of the room with my head held high. When the solid door of the great hall closed behind me, I laughed, a strange broken sound that echoed through the hallway. At least I was free—if I ran before Thandi sent his grunts after me. I would get my culled horse and ride straight out of town and never look back. If I rode far enough, maybe clear to Zumorda, I could start over as myself instead of the princess I was supposed to be.
“Mare?” Nils approached with a puzzled expression.
“You have the timing of the Six themselves,” I said. “Walk with me and keep the other liegemen off my back. I’ve got to get moving before they come after me.”
He sighed. “What did you do now?”
“Can’t explain. I have to go. Come on.” I tugged him down the hallway, casting a nervous look over my shoulder. Even through the doors I could hear the resurgence of chatter, a tidal wave that would surely follow me in some form. The liegemen outside the door shifted their weight uneasily, as if they knew Thandi would send someone after me. But they wouldn’t act on their own with Nils by my side. We hurried down the hallway toward my rooms. I’d take only what I could carry and be out in less than a sunlength.
“Mare, what in the Six Hells is going on?” Nils asked. “I’m on patrol.”
&n
bsp; “I know. Just patrol in this direction for a minute,” I said.
“What happened?”
“I’m leaving, Nils. I’m not marrying anyone. I’m making a run for it on my own. To Zumorda, I think.”
He frowned but nodded. “If that’s what you think is best, I support you. The Six know you’ve had enough thrown at you lately. Get out while you can. I’ll always have your back.” He squeezed my arm, and I smiled up at him. At least there was one person I could rely on. We rounded the corner into what should have been an empty hallway.
“Not so fast, Mare.” Lord Kriantz stood blocking our way, two of his men behind him, swords glinting in their hands.
Nils and I stopped short.
“I meant it, Endalan. I’m done. I’m not going anywhere with you. Don’t make this difficult.” I stood my ground, glancing around for the quickest route of escape.
“If she says she doesn’t want to go, you aren’t taking her anywhere,” Nils said, stepping up behind me.
“I’m afraid you’re wrong,” Lord Kriantz said. He smiled, and the expression didn’t quite reach his eyes. His eyes took in the scene with the smug look of someone who knows he has already won. My anger gave way to fear.
He raised his hand, and his men surged toward us.
The soldier after me was strong but slow, and I twisted and ducked out of his grasp. I landed a few blows as it quickly became apparent that Lord Kriantz had told his men not to injure me. Nils drew his sword and sparred with the other guard, metal screeching against metal and boots scuffing across the hallway as they fought.
“Enough of this.” Lord Kriantz swooped in. In one fluid motion he trapped me from behind and brought a thin blade up to my neck. The cold metal pressed into my skin enough to sting.
I froze.
“Stand down,” Lord Kriantz said to Nils. “You know I won’t kill her, but I’d be happy to free her of an unnecessary appendage or two.”
Nils dropped his sword and stepped back, raising his hands in surrender, his chest heaving from the exertion of the fight.
“That’s better,” Lord Kriantz said.
I struggled in his grip, landing a solid kick on his shin, but he didn’t even flinch.
“End him,” Lord Kriantz said to his men.
“No!” I screamed, thrashing with all my strength.
Lord Kriantz’s soldier stepped forward and plunged a short knife through Nils’s neck.
My broken heart shattered.
FORTY-ONE
Dennaleia
WHEN MARE’S LIPS LEFT MINE, SHE PULLED AWAY everything that mattered, laying me bare before the crowd. Nothing of my true self was expressed in the ornate dress, the charcoal accentuating my eyes, or the wine-red stain on my lips. The dark circles under my eyes had been smoothed away with mineral compound, as if the loss of the only person who mattered could be erased with a smudge of makeup—as if my Affinity could be locked away beneath the right clothing. The points of my tiara dug into my skull like the jaws of a beast closing over my head to seal my fate. Mare’s kiss was the only piece of truth anyone had seen tonight.
My mother stared at me from across the room as though seeing me for the first time, her face white with shock. Thandi simply turned and walked away, servants scurrying after him to attend to the wine on his trousers.
The ache in my heart grew too large to be contained by the room.
Someone took my hand. Ellaeni. Pain radiated from her eyes, and I recognized myself in her. But she had been wise enough to choose Claera at any cost, in spite of the objections of her family. One day they would find each other again.
My bones buzzed with magic, and a flower arrangement on a nearby table began to smolder. I let go of Ellaeni and shoved out the door of the great hall, afraid I might burn down the room around me. I followed the momentum of my feet, heading toward the royal wing, not sure what I would say, but knowing that I couldn’t let Mare leave like that. The party—and Thandi—could wait a few minutes for me. It wouldn’t be hard to make excuses. No one would be surprised that I needed a minute to regain my composure after the scene Mare had caused.
My steps echoed in the empty corridor, the absence of liegemen filling me with creeping tendrils of unease. On a feast night there should have been two guards in every walkway. A thump sounded in a nearby hallway.
I peered around the corner and froze. Nils lay on the floor, blood pooled beneath him. Mare was sobbing in anguish. A lump rose in my throat and I choked it down, afraid to reveal myself. At Lord Kriantz’s nod, one of his men silenced her with a fist to the head and she slumped against the soldier, unconscious. My nerves screamed, but my feet wouldn’t move.
“Burn him. Another body will help our cause,” Lord Kriantz said.
His soldiers nodded. One pulled a length of golden string from his pocket and wrapped it around Nils’s neck, trailing the ends over the chest of his uniform. Lord Kriantz handed Mare over to his men and stood over Nils, turning the ring on his left hand a calculated half turn. Brilliant violet flames sprang from the golden thread and engulfed Nils.
It hadn’t been a mage who had killed King Aturnicus. It had been Lord Kriantz. He must have been the shadow man who paid the Recusants to kill Casmiel, too—all in the interest of starting a war to win Zumordan land. My stomach heaved and the flames in the wall sconces exploded one by one, plunging the hallway into darkness lit only by Nils’s burning body.
“What the hell was that?” one of the soldiers said.
“Pick her up and let’s go. Now,” Lord Kriantz said.
I heard scuffling as one of Kriantz’s men heaved Mare over his shoulder, but by the time my eyes adjusted to the darkness, they were gone, no doubt through the exit nearby. I cursed under my breath, colorfully enough to impress even Mare, and sidled after them. Outside, the sharp clatter of shod hooves split the crisp night air. Lord Kriantz and his men wrestled Mare’s limp form into a coach drawn by two nondescript gray horses. As soon as the doors clicked shut, they trotted out the gate.
I couldn’t let it happen, but there was no way I could risk using my magic to stop them, not if it meant I might hurt Mare by mistake.
I bolted to the great hall. I had to get Thandi to send liegemen to reclaim her. The party had resumed some semblance of normalcy, other than the curious eyes that followed me and the liegemen who converged as I entered the room.
“We’ve been asked to escort you to His Majesty,” a liegeman said.
“Of course,” I replied, grateful that I wouldn’t have to barrel my way through the crowd to find him. It was almost too easy. The liegemen would lead me straight to Thandi, and then we could turn around and go after Mare before Lord Kriantz cleared the city gates.
The liegemen led me around the edge of the room to the antechamber behind the royal table and escorted me in. Thandi sat at the center of the small room, a servant scrubbing at the wine stains on his trousers.
“Ah, they found you,” he said. He waved everyone else out until I stood alone in front of him. His eyes dodged mine, as though he couldn’t quite look at me after the scene with Mare.
“Something terrible has happened.” I struggled to catch my breath, my heart and lungs warring with one another beneath the constricting bodice of my dress. “Lord Kriantz took Mare. I just saw him kill Nils with fabricated fire that looks like magic. Purple flames, like the ones that killed King Aturnicus. He has a gold ring that—”
Thandi’s gaze sharpened and he finally met my eyes at the mention of magic.
“That can’t be,” he said. “I saw Nils on patrol before I came here tonight—and people can’t fabricate magic. We have to focus on finding and eliminating the real source of these magical attacks and destroying them. Zumorda.”
“Are you serious? This isn’t even about magic. This is about the fact that Mare was forcibly dragged from the castle by the man who killed your father!” Panic made me light-headed. All he would have to do was go into the hallway and see Nils’s body to know I told the t
ruth.
“I’m sure you’re mistaken,” he said. “But if you’re that concerned, I’ll send a guard to check in with Nils and a page to Mare’s rooms to verify her presence.”
I could not fathom how he could be so calm.
“By then it will be too late!” Sparks intruded on the edges of my vision. “This isn’t about me and Mare. This is about our kingdom going to war for no reason. It’s about sacrificing the lives of our people so that Lord Kriantz can expand his holdings and crown himself king. Do you think I don’t know what I saw? That I don’t deserve to be taken seriously?”
“I trust Lord Kriantz,” Thandi said, his voice colder than the night air. “And surely you can understand my hesitation to trust you.”
“My eyes work as well as anyone else’s.” My hands grew warm until my palms tingled.
“Do you smell something burning?” Thandi looked around the room in alarm.
I let go of the chair I’d been clenching. Smoke rose where my fingers had been, and fright consumed me. I hadn’t meant to do it.
“By the Six.” Thandi stood, his expression thunderstruck. “It’s you.”
“No,” I said, terrified. If he held me responsible for his father’s death, I would be killed. Worse, persecuting me would distract him from going after Mare.
“You . . . you’re making this all up to hide that it was you. No wonder everything started after you got here. And you knew so much about the arrow . . . you must have been working with the Recusants. I can’t believe I was so stupid.” He backed away from me.
“None of that was me,” I said. “All I ever wanted was to be the best queen for Mynaria. I didn’t know anything about the Recusants until I got here. Please listen to me! We have to do something about Mare and Lord Kriantz! Don’t you see? He’s leading you into a war that benefits only him!”
“We must marry for the alliance to ride forward into war, but believe me, you will be tried and held responsible for any death you caused,” Thandi said. He edged toward the door.
For my entire life, duty had come first. Today, it was time to stand by my heart and my kingdom. I stood up straight and faced him head on.
Of Fire and Stars Page 28
