The Suffocation of Katie

by Glenna Maynard

  Kai takes my hand in his and kisses it as we pull on the highway beginning our road trip.

  Chapter 17

  Kai’s mom keeps checking in on us every so often. We are meeting up with her and Khloe in about another hour. They are stopped at a restaurant in Bluefield, Virginia for lunch.

  We have been keeping each other entertained by picking random radio stations and whatever song is playing whoever’s turn it is has to try to sing it whether we know the words or not. Kai tries to talk me into taking off an article of clothing every time I get a song wrong. I told him maybe next time we play I will.

  We get stuck behind the scene of an accident. Traffic is at a standstill. It has been fifteen minutes and we haven’t moved an inch so Kai shuts his car off to save on gas. I tried to get him to pull off at the last exit and refuel but he said we would be fine.

  I undo my seatbelt and he unbuckles his as well. I lay my head on his shoulder, which leads to heavy kissing and touching. Kai has a devious grin on his face when he says, “You know my windows are tinted and no one can see us.”

  I look to the cars on either side of us and he is right. Both sit low and the drivers are absorbed with their cell phones.

  Reaching over the console, I unzip Kai’s jeans not having a clue how to do what I want to do. Wrapping my fingers around him, I squeeze and stroke him as he becomes aroused. Laying my head in his lap, his fingers thread through my hair. My lips kiss his tip and he jerks in response. I grow more confident and swirl my tongue around the head. “Fuck,” he says, pushing my head further down, making me take more of him into my mouth.

  I thought doing this would gross me out, but it is exciting. I am starting to think I would do anything for Kai. I have no idea what I am doing and let him rock in and out of my mouth, his tender skin rubbing against my swollen lips.

  “Kat, baby I am about to lose it,” he warns me and I pull my head back as he jerks off in his hand.

  Watching him has me wanting him to do that inside me. When I tell him as much. His head falls back against his seat. “Killing me Kat.”

  I get him a baby wipe from the glove box and traffic starts to move, finally.

  We finally meet up with his mom and his sister at a gas station. Kai and I grab drinks and snacks from there instead of sitting down to eat to save on time. Kelli says we are going to spend the night at a hotel in Lexington, North Carolina, and drive the rest of the way tomorrow. We could drive the full distance to Myrtle Beach, but Khloe is getting restless.

  Kai tries his best to talk his mom into separate rooms but that is a no go of course. We are sharing a double. Khloe will be sleeping with me, Kai is sleeping on the pullout sofa and their mom is taking the other bed.

  The hotel has an indoor pool so Kai and I take Khloe down to swim while their mom relaxes in the room. Khloe looks adorable in her red and white cherry patterned bikini. I help her push her arms through her floaties. Kai says she can already swim pretty good, they started her as soon as they could in the pool at their house.

  Kai takes his t-shirt off and I just want to go over and trace my tongue over the music notes tattooed down his side, but I don’t think that would be appropriate right now.

  Khloe is sitting on the steps of the pool waiting for us to get in with her. I kick my flip-flops off and shimmy out of my shorts while debating on leaving my tank top on. My boobs have gotten bigger since I bought this bikini and they pop out of the top a bit.

  Kai decides for me when he comes over and begins lifting the hem of my shirt up. His eyes go wide at the sight of me in my swimsuit.

  “Killing me,” he groans.

  “’Mere Kai!” Khloe shouts.

  Kai kisses my cheek searing my skin with his warm lips. He goes over to the steps with Khloe and she wraps her arms around his neck as he takes her into the deeper end of the pool.

  Going over to the ladder, I dip my toes in the water trying to slowly get adjusted to the water’s temperature.

  Kai and Khloe swim over next to where I am sitting. He whispers something in her ear and lets her go. She swims over to the ledge away from me and holds on to the edge of the pool. Kai comes towards me with a devious grin and climbs up the ladder.

  “Get in,” he demands in a husky tone.

  “No,” I quip.

  Khloe starts giggling at my telling him no.

  “You asked for it,” he warns.

  Before I can respond, Kai has his strong arms around me pulling me in and under. His lips touch mine briefly, as we rise to the surface.

  Khloe swims out to us. She orders me to the other end of the pool so she can swim back and forth between us. After three laps, she is exhausted so I get her out and dry her off. Kai tells me to take her to take a nap in the room with his mom and come back to the pool. There is a hot tub and he says he will be waiting in it for me.

  Kai’s mom is asleep so I get in bed with Khloe and pet her hair until she falls asleep. It takes a bit longer than I anticipated getting her to sleep. Her eyes close and I slowly creep out of the room. Kai is probably a hot prune by now.

  The elevator ride down seems to take forever, making three other stops before I finally reach the pool level. When I go to the hot tub three girls surround Kai. He doesn’t seem to be missing my company one bit. He doesn’t even see me standing here watching him flirt. Is this what he is like all the time and I just have never seen him with other girls besides Raven? My chest aches as one of the three girls admires his tattoo.

  “That’s so hot,” she says with a giggle and she actually touches him.

  Kai catches my eyes just as I spin around to leave. “Kat!” he shouts my name but I don’t stop walking. “Kat, stop!” he shouts again running after me. His hand clutches my shoulder with his other hand going around my waist. His lips brush over my ear, his breath hot and sticky. “Kat, you don’t need to be jealous. No girl will ever compare to you for me.”

  “She was touching you,’” I say trying to pull from his hold.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t know she was going to,” he apologizes. “Am I forgiven?” he licks the shell of my ear sending goose bumps all over my body. He links his hand with mine. “Come on, I think there is a sauna. Let’s see if it’s empty.”

  “You are forgiven this time,” I tease him.

  We have to walk passed the hot tub to get to the sauna. All three of those girls give me a dirty look as we walk by. I smile at them, wink, and make sure I pull Kai in for a kiss while they watch. He’s mine girls, I think to myself.

  “I think I like it when you get jealous and possessive,” Kai whispers into my neck and squeezes my butt. “I was telling them about my band, Kat. There are going to be girls and lots of them and I am going to smile and flirt back. Not because I want them but because I am trying to get my music noticed. Okay?”

  “I get it Kai, I really do. Doesn’t mean that I have to like it.” I remember what Raven told me about Kai not wanting the guys to have steady girlfriends and my chest aches again.

  We go into the sauna and there is a bunch of sweaty old men so we decide to say forget it and go back to the room to change and get something for dinner.

  Back in the room, Kelli and Khloe are up and watching TV. “There you two are. I was beginning to wonder if I was going to have to come looking for you. Are you guys getting hungry? I thought we could just go down to the hotel restaurant so we can turn in early and get to the beach early.”

  “Sounds good,” Kai, says with his dimples on full display. I nod and grab my bag so I can go into the bathroom and change. I put on a nice shirt and leggings and pull my hair into a ponytail.

  Kai keeps it simple in a t-shirt and jeans. Khloe has to wear her bathing suit under her dress, she is refusing to take it off and Kelli doesn’t want to argue with her. Kai was right his mom is a pushover when it comes to her kids. I find it to be sweet that she wants to make them happy so much. I never had that growing up. All I ever got was a drunken prostitute telling me what an ungrateful abomination
I am.

  We go down to the restaurant and Khloe insists on sitting between Kai and me. He nudges my foot with his foot and winks at me. I see the girls from earlier sitting at the table across from us and they are giggling as they stare at Kai. He follows my eyes and shakes his head, amused knowing I am still jealous. I can’t help it. The thought of Kai and other girls makes me crazy.

  We finish eating and get back to the room so we can head out early.

  Not long after the lights go out, I start feeling anxious. I quietly slip out of bed and pad across the carpet to the bathroom. I wait until I get the door closed to turn on the light. I am so excited to see the beach tomorrow. Splashing some cool water on my face makes me feel a little better. My stomach is flipping and flopping. I turn out the bathroom light and open the door slowly. When I step out Kai clamps his hand over my mouth. I know it is him by his touch and his smell. He whispers softly in my ear for me to give him five minutes.

  I creep to the pullout sofa with him. His mouth is on mine. It feels so wrong to be making out with him, with his mom and Khloe on the other side of the bathroom, but I crave his kisses too much to stop it.

  Kai’s fingers are in my pajama bottoms rubbing against my heated skin. Feels so good. I start touching him and soon he has my pants off. “I want you so bad Kat.”

  “I want you too Kai,” I whisper. He pinches my nipple and bites my ear. I start easing his briefs down when I hear Khloe say my name. I roll quickly out of the bed, pull my pants up, and pretend to be coming out of the bathroom, just as his mom meets me at the edge of the wall. God, that was close.

  She smiles pleased that she didn’t just catch me about to screw her son in the same room she is sleeping in.

  Relief washes over me when I hear her get back in bed moments later. I can’t sleep after that. I have an aching desire for Kai between my thighs. I try to think of anything other than him so I can get to sleep but I can’t.

  I find comfort in the thought that Kai is lying awake right now and wanting me just as much.

  Chapter 18

  The next morning Khloe wakes me up pressing her tiny hands on my chest and shaking me. “Up Katie!”

  “Okay I’m up,” I yawn out. Kai and his mom are already up and taking our bags down to the car.

  Kai steps behind me as I am going to the bathroom and snickers. “Your pants are inside out and backwards.”

  Mortified, I dart into the bathroom hoping his mom didn’t notice. I change quickly and brush my teeth. When I come out of the bathroom, Kai is waiting, leaning up against the wall, with his dimples grinning at me.

  I walk on by him and grab my bag. He pulls me into him roughly, takes my bag from me, and drops it on the floor. “Mom and Khloe are getting in the car, and leaving right now. We have a few minutes before housekeeping will be coming in, to clean the room.” He waggles his brows at me.

  My shirt is over my head in an instant. Kai’s fingers and mouth attack my body with a burning passion. I feel on fire as his touch sets my skin ablaze. My hands are all over his body touching him anywhere and everywhere. Our mouths are practically glued together as we get tangled in the sheets.

  I am down to only my panties, and Kai is in the nude, his body pressed against mine. The only thing in the way of him entering me is a tiny piece of fabric.

  His mouth is on my neck as he kisses my fevered flesh. “I want to be inside you so bad.”

  “Then do it Kai, take what you want.”

  He growls into my mouth and asks if I am on the pill. I assure him that I have been on the shot for birth control since I turned fifteen. He pushes my panties to the side and slams into me. My legs wrap around his waist and he stills. “Fuck, I am afraid to move. You already have me wanting to cum, you are so tight.”

  I arch my back and buck my hips dying for him to have his way with my body. He rocks against my hips slowly, killing me.

  “Let me on top,” I tell him.

  We roll awkwardly changing positions. His hands are gripping my hips as I grind down on him. His eyes roll back in his head, his mouth is open, and his heart is hammering out of his chest. It’s beautiful watching him come undone as he finds his release. Warmth fills my core. I collapse on his chest. Kai kisses the top of my head and tells me breathily how amazing I am and that he loves me. No one has ever made me feel the way that Kai does. I don’t ever want to lose this feeling.

  ~**~

  We leave for Myrtle Beach soon after our romp, meeting up again with Kelli and Khloe at our hotel for the next week. The first thing I want to do is feel the sand between my toes. Kai barely has his car parked before I am running to the shore.

  The ocean takes my breath away…almost as much as Kai does. I think I have changed my mind about New York. I want to wake up to this every day. Change in life plans…move to the Carolinas.

  Kai is watching me amused by my childish excitement. He still can’t believe I have never been outside of our little town. His arms embrace me from behind and I lay my head back on his shoulder. “Thank you for making this possible Kai. I love it.”

  Kai and I go up to the room to get settled in and take showers. His mom booked us in a three-bedroom suite. Kai and I have our own rooms and the same rules apply that we follow at home. Doors open when we enter each other’s rooms and we are to sleep in our own beds.

  I feel like I should pinch myself being here with Kai, his mom and Khloe…this is amazing.

  Kai is in his room stretched on his bed with his guitar and a notebook. He has a frustrated expression on his face. “Want to help me with this song? The lyrics are still giving me an issue.”

  “Sure.” I take his notebook and pen and read over what he has. I rip a blank page from his book and fill in some lyrics that make me think of us in some ways.

  The weight of your love is bearing down on me

  I can’t breathe…I’m on fire

  If this is what being hurt by you feels like, then…I love pain…

  Being loved is just like being suffocated

  I want you to suffocate me

  Your smile is my number one addiction

  Making you laugh is my obsession

  I’ll be your pain and you’ll be my biggest regret…you set me on fire

  Give me your love and suffocate me…I’m on fire

  I give him the paper and watch as his eyes scan over the lines I added. He strums his guitar playing a hypnotic melody. Watching Kai get lost in his music is seriously beautiful. The way he plays with perfect ease, the way the sounds pour from his throat, he makes you feel his pain and desire. He glances at me, smiling; I swear those dimples are the sexiest thing I have ever seen. I swear my boyfriend is going to be famous one day.

  He lays his guitar to the side and motions me to him. I curl up on the other side of him and we end up falling sleep from exhaustion from traveling the past two days.

  After our much needed nap, Kai and I go for a walk on the strip. We do all the tourist stuff, visiting gift shops and getting shot glasses and silly his and her t-shirts. I snag a shirt for Raven too. I know how badly she wanted to come.

  We visit the wax museum and some of those statues are so creepy. I snap a picture of Kai with the wax version of Hugh Hefner. He takes one of me with Adam Levine. I send the pic of Adam and me to Raven and she replies with a pouty face.

  Kai pulls me into a photo booth and we make out like crazy. I don’t think you can see our faces in any of the pictures.

  My phone buzzes with an incoming call from my mother. I don’t want to answer it and have her spoil the great night we are having, but the guilt of ignoring proves to be too much.

  “Hello,” I answer dreading what is to come.

  “Where are you Katie?”

  “Out with Kai,” I reply hesitant to tell her I am at the beach. Who knows what she will try to do.

  “Why haven’t you come to see me? I’m in the hospital ya know.”

  “I’m sorry you are hurt. Did David do that to you?”

  �
��No, why would you say something like that. I fell down the steps out front and got banged up is all.” I know she is lying so I lie to and tell her I will come talk to her soon. I am sure she will be back to thinking I am the bane of her existence soon enough.

  “You okay?” Kai kisses my temple noticing that phone call drained the life out of me.

  “I’m perfect, because I’m here with you.” I kiss his cheek and try to put on a smile for him.

  We end up back on the beach after he takes our stuff to the room. I decide to tell Kai everything about my mother, all of it. I start from the beginning. The look on his face when I tell him I am the product of rape has me scared that maybe he won’t want me anymore. What if he thinks that I am dirty? Tears sting at my eyes when I tell him how I went to church hoping God would see that I wasn’t bad, because my mother is always referring to me as an abomination. Kai cries with me when I get to the part about my mom thinking I would take her place and become a whore too.

  I keep waiting for him to run away hard and fast but he doesn’t. Instead, he holds me tight against his chest. “Kat, baby you will never live that life again. I promise you I won’t ever let anyone hurt you or make you do anything you don’t want to do. If anyone ever tries I will kill them.”

  I thought maybe Kai would open up and share his secret with me but he doesn’t. We sit on the beach just the two of us; the rest of the world seems to fade away as I lay here in his arms looking at the moon and the stars, wishing that we could stay like this forever. I want to push him to tell me everything about his relationship with Raven, but maybe after all of the heavy I just laid on him, his truth would be too much honesty for today.

  The waves crash against the shore as the moon shines bright above. Kai sings softly in my ear soothing me. His voice just does something to me. I swear when he sings it as if he is speaking to my soul.

  “Do you believe in soulmates Katie?”

  “I like to believe that it is a real thing. That maybe there are two halves to one soul wandering the world looking for their home. And when they finally unite they become one.”