Steve also hoped he and Ben would get into a regular Bible study together. He really valued the weekend they’d spent digging into Revelation while Michelle was off at her New Age Conference. He had so much to learn about the scriptures, and Ben was an able guide.
Who knows? Maybe he could even get Roger to join them in a weekly study. Roger seemed like the kind of guy who would be open to that. He was basically a down-to-earth person with a sense of deep love and responsibility for his family. Contrary to the stereotypical image of attorneys as sharks, Roger set a good example for Steve as a person of integrity.
Steve picked up his bag and his Bible and headed out the door. He imagined Michelle’s expression when he surprised her in Bridgeport. For a moment, a wave of hesitation washed over him as he remembered her seeming ambivalence on the phone. Shaking off his concern, he closed the door, locking the bolt securely behind him.
Michelle was sitting in her motel room by herself. Her mom was at the hospital with her dad, so she’d come back to send an email to her best friend, Kristin. She still couldn’t get over the excitement of Kristin’s announcement that she was getting married. What a surprise it had been to have her show up at the hospital chapel. It was almost as if God sent Kristin to show her He really did hear her cries and was responding to her pleas.
Kristin’s fiancé, Mark, really impressed Michelle, and she was thrilled her friend had found such a great guy. It sure seemed weird though to be surrounded by all these pastor-type friends all of a sudden. First it was Steve’s old high school buddy, Ben, showing up in Sandy Cove and preparing to plant a church there. Now it was Kristin marrying a youth pastor.
Michelle wondered if this might be some kind of conspiracy on God’s part to corner her back into her childhood faith. Whatever it was, she was glad she had time in Bridgeport to sort through her beliefs. A part of her still clung to what she had been learning and experiencing in her New Age classes and studies, but a bigger part was feeling more at home with the faith of her grandparents.
Grandpa Phil was great. He knew how to make himself available without forcing any ideas or practices onto her. She loved to listen to him pray over her father and read the scriptures to him. His voice communicated a quiet confidence, and she could see how it seemed to relax and reassure her father.
Settling down at the little table by the window, Michelle flipped open her laptop and started typing an email to Kristin. She felt totally safe pouring out all her thoughts and fears with her childhood friend. Kristin knew Michelle inside out and loved her in spite of her faults. Unconditional love -- that’s what Grandpa Phil called it. He said God loved Michelle with that kind of love too.
Well, right now, Kristin was more concretely accessible than God was. So Michelle would write to her friend and allow God to read it over her shoulder.
Hi Kristin,
I’m so glad you came to Bridgeport last week. Steve was right. I really needed you. I love the way it seems as if no time has passed between us each time we see each other again. You are such a great friend, and I hope we will be friends forever.
Dad is doing so much better. He can look at us now, and he nods his head for yes and no. Sometimes I can barely contain my excitement at his recovery, but other times I think about what Dr. Jeffries said about how Dad would feel if he had to live his life as an invalid, and I get really worried. You know how he is. Can you picture him allowing people to take care of him for the rest of his life?
Please pray for him and for all of us. He still has a long way to go. The doctors don’t say much, but he can’t move his left side at all, and he barely moves his right hand. He looks so vulnerable just lying there on the bed all day and all night. Sometimes he winces like he is in some kind of pain, and sometimes he just closes his eyes and won’t open them for the whole day. Anyway, we need lots of prayers. I guess you know a lot about praying, being engaged to a pastor.
Can you believe it, Kristin? I’m so excited for you and Mark. After all that waiting, you are getting the best! So how are the wedding plans coming along? I’m eager to hear all the details. Wish I could be there with you to help with everything. I need to clone myself twice – once to be with Steve back at Sandy Cove and once more to be with you in Southern California.
Steve was thinking of coming down here for the weekend, but I guess he must be too swamped with work. Every time I bring it up in our conversations, he is very evasive and says he’s not sure. Sometimes he seems kind of distant. I guess it must be hard for him to know what to say or do when he’s here with us in Bridgeport. We’re always talking to doctors, or sitting with Dad, or crashing on a couch or our motel beds from utter exhaustion. It really doesn’t give Steve and I much time to be together or talk. I miss him, but I’m so busy and tired most of the time, that it seems almost better to be apart right now.
There’s something else I need to talk to you about, but I don’t want to write it in an email. Maybe I’ll try to call you one evening this week. It’s kind of personal, so I’ll have to see if I can find a time when Mom is out of the room. I’d call right now, but I know you’d be at work.
Well, anyway, I guess that’s all for now. I’m sure I’ll be here for at least another week or two. Thankfully I’ve got my laptop now, so you can write whenever you get a chance.
Thanks again for coming last week. Best Friends Forever! Love, Michelle
Michelle yearned to see Kristin. She needed to work through her feelings about Trevor, and Kristin could help her do that. She’d really listen to her without passing judgment.
Michelle knew she belonged to Steve and it would be wrong to have any kind of relationship with Trevor other than strictly friendship. But her feelings wrestled within her as she fought the chemistry she couldn’t deny. Kristin seemed like the only one who could help her figure all this out.
Trevor and Starla sat at the back of the New World Bookstore, sipping licorice tea and talking about Michelle. Starla felt a cosmic responsibility for Michelle, the young lady she had taken under her wing and guided gently into levels of expanded consciousness.
Now she and Trevor were pondering Michelle’s vulnerability down in Bridgeport. Starla’s rounded frame, engulfed in a floor length Indian print dress, sat forward in her wicker chair as she rubbed her open palms together, her waist length gray hair flowing down her back.
“If her grandparents weren’t there, she’d probably be fine,” Trevor stated thoughtfully as he pyramided his fingertips. His piercing blue eyes narrowed under his furrowed brow.
“Yes. She could easily weaken to their influence. Especially under the circumstances,” Starla continued, staring into the black tea. “Let’s join together and send her guidance via the channels. Hopefully she will be responsive to their leading.”
Both parties closed their eyes and sat upright. Other than the occasional sound of the wind moaning softly outside, the room was silent.
Several moments later a low hum resonated from deep within Starla. Soon Trevor’s body responded with a hum of the same pitch. The sound crept into every niche of the locked bookstore. Starla and Trevor’s faces remained expressionless as they emitted this continuous tone. Eventually they fell silent again.
A moment later Starla spoke. “Gods of the universe, Spirit Guides who lead us, send your wisdom to Michelle. Set her free from the bondage of her ancestors and their archaic beliefs. Elevate her to higher levels of consciousness. Use all that we have taught her to show her your better path to truth.”
Trevor rocked back and forth in his chair, his eyes still closed. He began to chant a nondescript term over and over. Shadows enveloped them as Starla joined the chant. And the wind continued to howl outside the darkened bookstore.
An image of Trevor popped into Michelle’s mind. She was remembering one of her classes on personal evolution she and her friend, Monica, had been taking at the bookstore. She pictured the class settling into their closing meditation, the one they performed at the end of each session. Sitting in a circl
e with their legs crossed and their eyes closed, they held hands and hummed a tone.
It started with Trevor and would work its way around the circle until they were all emanating this sound of resonance. The hum lasted for a few moments and then quietly receded into silence. Then Trevor would help them connect with their universal selves. “We are all one,” he would affirm. “We are all one,” they would chant in unison.
At first the meditation had troubled Michelle. It seemed so far out and mystical to her. But after several weeks, she came to look forward to those moments of oneness with the other class members and especially with Trevor, whose charisma had captivated her.
Sitting by herself in the motel room, she felt the hum starting up within her soul. Part of her wanted to yield to it, and part was alarmingly urging her to flee. She allowed a short, soft sound to escape; then she stood, closed the laptop, and walked out the door.
Steve set his Bible on the empty seat beside him, his mind filled with thoughts of Michelle. Silently he prayed for her, pouring out his heart to God and asking for strength and protection for his beautiful bride. He hoped his appearance at the hospital in a couple of hours would be a blessing to Michelle. His arms ached for her and his heart yearned to shelter her with his love. He prayed God would bridge whatever distance he perceived developing between them. Was it his imagination or was Michelle actually pulling away?
Steve was lost in his thoughts when the airline attendant gently tapped him on the shoulder and asked him to buckle his seat belt for take off. He quickly complied, retrieving his Bible and holding it firmly in his hands.
“Nervous about flying?” the attendant asked.
“No, just got lots on my mind,” Steve replied.
“I hear you,” she responded sympathetically. “Have a great flight, and let me know if you need anything.”
Steve nodded and watched her walk to her seat and belt herself in. She looked up at him and smiled. He returned her smile, closed his eyes, and leaned back against the headrest as the plane surged into the air.
CHAPTER SIX
The clock on the wall displayed 9:00, but the weariness of a midnight hour pressed on Michelle’s aching shoulders. Her mom and grandparents were across the street at the motel while she sat with her dad.
They usually tried to stay with him until 11:00 each night, taking turns resting and keeping him company. Each shared the unspoken fear that if left alone, John Ackerman would quietly slip back into his coma. It always took awhile to get him to respond in the morning, so by the end of the day they hesitated to leave him.
Michelle rolled her head from side to side to try to release some of the tension as she sat slouched in the chair by his pillow. Her eyelids were drooping, and she blinked to force them open. Sherrene, their favorite night nurse, approached her with a Styrofoam cup filled with steaming hot coffee.
“Thanks,” Michelle said, retrieving the cup from her hand. “He’s so quiet tonight.”
“Yes, I’ve noticed he seems to close his eyes around 8:00 the past few evenings. Sometimes he perks up again, but other times he’ll be out until morning.”
“You don’t think he’s regressing, do you?” Michelle’s voice was thick with concern.
“I think he just gets tired, Michelle. This is a daily battle for him. But he’s trying to hold on,” she added, reaching over and adjusting the covers draped over John’s still form.
A gentle knock on the doorjamb distracted both Michelle and Sherrene. Standing there in the opening to the cubicle was Steve, holding a bouquet of wildflowers.
“Steve!” Michelle rose to her feet nearly spilling her coffee. “Hi, babe,” Steve grinned, opening his arms. She handed her cup to Sherrene and rushed into his arms. Steve’s arms felt great to Michelle.
She collapsed as she leaned heavily against him. At times like this, she realized how much of a burden she was trying to shoulder by herself. Just standing there in his embrace, she could feel the tension draining from her body.
“How did you get here?” she asked, pulling back to look into his eyes.
“I walked,” he replied with a straight face. “Very funny,” Michelle retorted, grinning. “Actually, I flew, but I would have walked if it was the only way to get to you,” he added, leaning down and kissing her forehead.
“How romantic,” Sherrene observed, winking.
“Don’t get him going,” Michelle warned. “It’ll go straight to his head.”
Steve drew her back into another embrace, while the nurse quietly slipped past them and out to the nurses’ station.
“I’m glad you’re here,” Michelle murmured.
“Really? I’m glad you’re glad,” he replied.
“But you should have called me. Now we won’t have our own room,” she added with a sigh.
“I took care of that. I called and got us a reservation for tonight and tomorrow night.”
Michelle looked up at him. His eyes were filled with love. They kissed each other tenderly as she soaked in his familiar embrace and kiss.
“I have another surprise for you, too,” Steve added.
“What’s that?”
“Ben and Kelly found a house to rent a few miles away from ours.”
“Cool.” She smiled as she thought about what a great friendship Steve and Ben had developed after all these years.
“That’s just part of the surprise. They’re driving up to Oregon in a rented truck with all their belongings, and they’re stopping in Bridgeport overnight tomorrow. I got them a room at our motel.”
“That’s great,” Michelle said, trying to sound enthusiastic.
He seemed to sense her hesitation. “They won’t be here until at least the middle of the afternoon tomorrow,” he explained, as if to reassure her they would have their own personal time together.
Sheila walked in the cubicle just as Michelle was nodding to Steve. “Steve -- I didn’t know you were coming down!” she exclaimed, turning to Michelle.
“I didn’t know either,” Michelle said, grinning. “He surprised me.”
“What a wonderful surprise,” Sheila observed, hugging him.
“Speaking of surprises, what are you doing back here?” Michelle asked her mother.
“I decided to come sit with you after I got your grandparents settled back in their room. You looked so tired when I left. I hated for you to be here by yourself.”
“That was sweet of you, Mom, but I’m fine. Really.”
“I can sit with her,” Steve said. “You go back and get some sleep.”
“Not on your life,” Sheila replied. “You two haven’t seen each other all week. Go back over to the motel and spend some time together. I can stay here. Besides, I miss John while I’m over there.”
“I know how you feel, Mom,” Michelle said, stepping into the conversation. “But you need your rest. We won’t be helping Dad if we get exhausted and end up getting sick. Steve called ahead and got an extra room, so you don’t need to stay here on account of us.”
Michelle watched her mother gaze down at her father and sigh. He looked as if he was sleeping peacefully, his chest slowly rising and falling with the gentle rhythm of his breathing. She could see her mom’s eyes fill with tears. But something inside Michelle told her these were tears of joy that her father was still alive. And somewhere in those tears, she suspected her mother was wrestling with concern about whether or not he would ever fully recover.
“Are you okay, Mom?” she asked.
Her mother nodded. “Just a lot on my mind.” She slowly tipped her head from side to side and rubbed the back of her neck.
“You look exhausted,” Michelle said. “Let’s walk back over to the motel together.” Taking her mother’s hand, she added, “He’ll be fine for the night. He’s resting comfortably.”
Sheila sighed deeply. “Okay, sweetheart. I guess you’re right.” She leaned over and kissed her Michelle’s father’s forehead. “I love you, darling,” she whispered to him. The only response was hi
s steady breathing and the continuous beeps of the monitors.
Steve and Michelle escorted Sheila to her room, and Michelle gathered up her things. Then Steve led her to a room nearby. As they entered, Michelle noticed the identical layout and décor. She felt instantly at home. “It seems like we’ve taken over the whole resort.”
Steve smiled in reply. This was definitely not a resort. But it was safe and comfortable. And now it gave him a place to reconnect with his wife.
They sat down side-by-side on the edge of the bed. Steve draped his arm over his wife’s shoulders. “So how are you holding up?” he asked, compassion filling his gaze.
“I’m fine. But I’m worried about my mother. She is so exhausted, Steve. She doesn’t realize what a toll this is taking on her. I’m really concerned she’ll end up collapsing.”
“I’ve been praying for her, and for all of you,” he added, feeling a little vulnerable bringing up the subject of prayer.
“Thanks, honey. Keep praying.” She hesitated then added, “Steve?”
“Yeah?”
“What would you think of starting a family before I finish school – like reversing the order and having kids first, then my career later?”
Steve looked her in the eye. “What brought this up?”
“I don’t know. It’s just that I’m frustrated about not getting into the university for fall. And then all this with my dad and the hospital. It would just be so great to have something positive for all of us to focus on now. Can we at least think about it?”
He could tell this wasn’t the time for debate. “Okay. We can think about it.”
Her eyes sparkled. “I’ll still take the anthropology class this term.”
Through the Tears (Sandy Cove Series Book 2) Page 4
