by Julia Gray
have been able to do nothing for the children once they are born.'
The more he heard, the more Terrel became convinced that it would take something greater than his nascent talents to overcome this disease.
'I watched my first-born fade away before my eyes,' the youngest of the group said quietly. 'And I could do nothing to help her. Now I don't know if I'll ever get the chance to try again.'
'You will, Liana,' Tavia told her gently. 'That's why the Messenger has come to us.'
Terrel had been deeply affected by the wrenching sadness in the young woman's voice, but the sympathy he felt had to be weighed against logic. It was possible that the price of averting an even greater tragedy would be to leave this one unsolved. He couldn't afford to stay more than a few days at most —
even that was longer than he'd originally intended - but he could at least put what time he did have to good use.
'Did anything happen here four years ago?' he asked. 'Did any strangers visit you who might have been carrying the infection? Or did you change the way you grow your food?'
'No, nothing like that.' Tavia hesitated. 'But . . .'
'But what?'
'The ground shook,' Liana said.
'An earthquake?'
'Yes,' Amie confirmed. 'It was a bad one, but we can't see how that would have had such an effect on our health. There were a few injuries, but they soon healed.'
'But this was the only unusual occurrence at that time?'
'Yes,' Amie admitted. 'The tremor was unexpected.'
'So you usually know when to expect them?' Terrel asked, wondering how they were able to achieve this when they had never seen the moons.
'It is all part of the jasper,' Tavia answered. 'Such things were laid down long ago. The patterns of the oracles are constant in this.'
'Unless we are upon the time of change,' Zelgren commented. 'That too was prophesied.'
Terrel almost told them about the Dark Moon then, but realized it would mean nothing to them. He could not help wondering whether the elemental's influence might have had something to do with the seemingly fateful earthquake. If that were the case, could it even be in some way responsible for the women's illness? Although the idea seemed far-fetched, the notion that the elemental had created the sleepers had also seemed absurd at first.
'Tell me more about the jasper,' he said.
'We'll do better than that,' Tavia said. 'We'll show you. Come.' She stood up, and everyone else followed her example. She led them all to the outskirts of the village, to where a large black boulder lay. As Terrel expected, one part of it had been sliced away to leave a flat plane, which was inscribed with more of the marks he had seen the day before. This one also had a section of hieroglyphs above the other signs, and he saw a familiar symbol in their midst.
'The rings of life,' Tavia said, noting the direction of his gaze. 'Just like those marked on your hand.'
'And the inscriptions around it are in the before-tongue?' Terrel guessed.
'They are. It is here that your arrival was prophesied, many generations ago. Now that you have come to us, you will be our leader. We will do whatever you say.'
Terrel wondered what their response would be if he simply said 'Let me go', but he kept the thought to himself.
'Our future is in your hands,' Tavia told him solemnly. 'I hope you are ready to accept the responsibilities of destiny.'
Chapter Thirty
As Terrel entered the room where the six pregnant women were waiting for him, his first impression was not of ill health but of fear - and he thought initially that he might be the cause. The women all looked surprised and anxious as they stared at him, and he realized that although they might have seen him before -either the previous evening or during the elders' meeting -
this was certainly the first time they'd seen him close to. Apart from his
'burnt' skin, the fact that he was both male and young, and that his limbs were obviously deformed, probably did nothing to inspire confidence in his abilities. He suspected that this was not how they had pictured the Messenger.
However, he soon realized that although they were apprehensive about his presence, the real source of their fear came from within.
Knowing that every baby born during the last four year had died was bound to terrify them - and the
knowledge that they carried inside them not only their own hopes but those of an entire community could not have made their situation any easier. Terrel remembered Babak telling him that the human mind was a wonderful physician and, by the same token, it seemed logical that it could also be the reverse.
If these women believed that their babies would be ill - and they had plenty of reason to believe just that - then it might well become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Conversely, if they could be given sufficient faith in him, it was possible that he might be able to allay their fears and thus change their fates. A curse only worked if its victims believed that it would. This had been another of the pedlar's maxims - but Terrel could hardly tell the women that. It would be tantamount to claiming that all those who had lost their children had done so deliberately. Their circumstances made this group of women particularly vulnerable, and he knew he would have to be very careful in what he said.
'This is the Messenger,' Tavia announced. 'His name is Terrel, and he is a healer.'
None of the women said anything, but Terrel saw a little flicker of hope in their eyes. He began to feel uncomfortable under their combined scrutiny. At fifteen years of age, the last thing he wanted was to be surrounded by a lot of obviously pregnant women. It had been different with Ysatel, because he had come to know - and love - her, but the boy found these bloated strangers vaguely repulsive. He was not entirely ignorant about sex - at least in theory
- but its subtleties were still a mystery to him, the subject of unfulfilled longings. Being presented with such plentiful evidence of others' amatory exploits both embarrassed and unnerved him. Something of this must have shown on his face, because the youngest of the group - a girl who could not have been much older than Terrel himself, and who stood slightly apart from the other five - grinned suddenly.
''This is the Messenger?' she queried. 'I'll bet you haven't even been with a girl, have you?'
Terrel blushed as she smiled knowingly.
'That is entirely irrelevant,' Tavia snapped. The girl's lack of reverence had clearly annoyed the elder, but the other women were trying to hide their smiles.
'Not everyone's such a quick learner as you, Esera,' one of the expectant mothers remarked pointedly.
'No,' the girl agreed. 'They're not clever enough.'
'Getting yourself pregnant wasn't exactly clever, was it?'
'Quite right. I am to be pitied,' Esera responded sarcastically. 'Especially as I haven't been able to get my man to marry me.'
'She won't even tell us who the father is.'
'She probably doesn't know,' another woman suggested, provoking laughter among her companions.
'Oh, I know,' Esera said, apparently quite unperturbed by their taunts.
'Worthless toerag. I wouldn't marry him even if he did ask me,' she added, staring defiantly at Terrel.
'Enough!' Tavia exclaimed. 'This is a serious occasion.'
Terrel had the feeling that the women were just trying to mask their own nervousness, and he was about to say something to that effect when Tavia turned back to him.
'What happens next, Terrel?' she asked, in a businesslike manner. 'Will you examine them?'
The older women looked slightly alarmed at this, but Esera just gave him a measuring glance, her eyebrows raised.
'I'll only need to hold your hands,' he blurted out, blushing furiously again.
'That's what they all say,' Esera replied, and a couple of the others giggled.
'Young lady,' Tavia began, rounding on the girl. 'If you can't-—'
'It's all right,' Terrel cut in, utterly humiliated but knowing that he must try to take charge of the situation.
'I know I'm not what you imagined when you thought of the Messenger, but I am a healer, and I'll do everything I can to help you. I'd like to get to know you all better, but I don't have much time, so I'll just do the best I can. Will you help me?' He had been looking from face to face as he spoke, but as he finished his gaze came to rest on Esera, and stayed there.
She looked uncertain for a moment, but then smiled and nodded.
'How could we refuse such a generous offer?' she said, and despite all that had gone before, Terrel felt a sudden conviction that under different circumstances the two of them could have been friends.
'Very well, then,' Tavia said, sounding relieved. 'Who wants to go first?'
After only a slight hesitation, it was Esera who volunteered.
'It might as well be me. I'm already beyond the day-stone ring, after all.'
'What does that mean?' Terrel asked.
'It means I'm not entirely respectable,' she told him. 'Being examined by a strange man can't do my reputation any harm.'
Tavia frowned disapprovingly, but Terrel was grateful to the girl for trying to lighten the mood. He moved forward until he was standing in front of her, but made no attempt to touch her.
'How long have you been pregnant?'
'Three cycles. I'm the latest recruit to this band of swollen bladders.'
'And you don't feel unwell?'
'I feel fine. We all do.' She was serious now. 'That's what makes this so strange. I mean, we all get emotional sometimes - angry or sad for no reason -
and until recently I felt sick every morning, but that's normal, isn't it?'
Terrel nodded, trying to think of something else he could ask in order to delay the fateful moment, but he'd run out of ideas.
'All right,' he said. 'Are you ready?'
Esera nodded and, for the first time, she looked very young and rather frightened.
'There's nothing to be afraid of,' he reassured her. 'I won't hurt you. Take my hand.'
As his dark fingers closed over her pale ones, Terrel fell, unresisting, into the waking dream. It had become such an easy, natural process that he closed his eyes and smiled, recalling a similar welcoming sensation of warmth and peace when he'd checked on the progress of Ysatel and her baby. That had been a draining but rewarding experience and, feeling more confident now, Terrel began to look for the small dream within another, the echoes of a new life.
It took him longer than expected, and when he finally succeeded, the shock of contact almost made him cry out. Far from being serene and comfortable, the unborn child's dreaming was chaotic - full of pain and a kind of morbid exhaustion, as if it were already being asked to fight a battle that was beyond its strength. When Terrel instinctively tried to lessen the hurt, the dream fragmented, becoming even more difficult to pin down. Shafts of agony, like bolts of fire, sliced through the dream-space; pools of sucking darkness swirled and eddied; and, far away, someone screamed. Everything Terrel did only seemed to make matters worse and he withdrew, defeated, knowing that he had been right. The illness that was tormenting the unborn babies was beyond his healing - beyond even his understanding.
As his fingers uncurled to release Esera's hand, he felt numb as well as bewildered. He found that he couldn't even find the strength to open his eyes, and knew he was about to collapse. He did not feel himself falling, but a moment later knew that he was on the floor. The last thing he heard before he became entirely oblivious of the outside world was Esera's voice.
'Well,' she said. 'I've never had that effect on a man before.'
When Terrel regained consciousness, he found that he was lying on the bed he'd slept in the night before. He had no idea how much time had passed. It was quite dark outside - but that meant little here. He groaned as he remembered the dream within a dream, and as he did
so, movement near the door told him that he was not alone.
'Are you all right?' Imana's pale face appeared out of the gloom like a small ghost. 'Is there anything you want?'
'No. I'm just tired.'
'The elders will want to speak to you,' she said anxiously. 'Shall I fetch them?'
'Not yet. Why are you looking after me?'
'I've been assigned to tend to you.' She sounded half timid, half proud. 'To assist you in any way I can.'
And to be my watchdog? Terrel wondered.
'It's because I was the one who found you,' she added by way of explanation.
'Will you sleep here again tonight?' he asked.
'Yes. On the porch.'
'Then you must arrange for a proper bed. You can't sleep on the floor like that.'
'I'm used to it.'
'Either you arrange it, or you'll sleep on my bed and I'll sleep on the floor,' he insisted. His own pallet was hardly a luxurious resting place, but it was better than bare boards.
'All right.' Her solemn expression gave way to a brief, shy smile.
'Can I ask you a question, Imana?'
'Of course.'
'What exactly is the darkness you talked about, the one outside the day-stones?'
The girl looked taken aback, but she recovered quickly.
'It's forbidden.'
'I know that. But why?'
'Evil spirits walk in the darkness.'
'Ghosts?'
'No. They are not human. Anyone who meets them is either killed or driven mad.' Her voice was trembling now, and Terrel decided not to press her further. He stored the information away, looking ahead to the time when he would leave the valley — whether his hosts liked it or not.
'Shall I bring the elders now?' she asked earnestly. 'They wanted—'
'Tell them I can't see them all,' he said quickly. He couldn't face the prospect of being interrogated by the entire group. 'I'd much rather just talk to one person.'
'I'll tell them,' Imana said, and practically ran from the room.
'That doesn't sound too good,' Amie said.
Terrel had just finished telling her all he could remember of his encounter with Esera. He had been surprised that it had been Amie and not Tavia who had come in response to his message, but as they talked he began to appreciate the younger woman's keen intelligence and practical mind. She seemed to have set aside her earlier scepticism about his healing abilities, and was listening attentively to everything he had to say.
'It's not,' Terrel agreed. 'I've no idea what we're dealing with here, and I'm almost certain I won't be able to help.'
Amie looked grave, but said nothing.
'I can stay two more days at the most,' Terrel went on. 'I'll do everything I can during that time, including
examining the rest of the women, but I can't promise anything more. And after that I will have to leave.' The time he was wasting was already weighing on his mind, and giving himself a deadline made it easier to plan his actions -
and he wanted to be as open and as honest as he could. 'Will the elders agree to let me go then?'
'We may be powerless in this,' Amie replied. 'Such matters are the province of the jasper.'
'Yes, but surely it's you who interpret the oracles? By itself the jasper is meaningless.'
'No. Many things are fixed, so that no interpretation is necessary - or possible. There are many cycles within the jasper. The alternation of light and dark, the long cycle that is called a year in the burning lands, and many more. It is from these that our lives are regulated, and our fates foretold.'
In spite of the fact that he was still anxious to discuss his departure, Terrel was intrigued.
'Does the jasper include the cycle of the moons?'
'It would seem so,' Amie replied, 'although no one knows now how this comes about. We've been asked this question before by outsiders. They find it strange that we could respond to something we cannot see.'
'So do I,' Terrel admitted.
'Isn't it possible that the world contains means of communication other than light?'
'Of course. There's sound, for a start.'
'And what about things b
eyond our so-called normal senses?' she went on.
'Perhaps we respond to such powers. Your moons may talk to us in ways we don't understand - perhaps in a manner to which we are uniquely sensitive.'
Terrel considered this for a few moments before he spoke again.
'One of the moons has changed its nature recently.' 'I thought as much,' Amie said. 'I believe this is why
you are here, Terrel. To help us understand this time of change. And to survive it.'
Chapter Thirty-One
True to his word, Terrel did everything he could over the next two days to try to heal the babies' mysterious ailment. To save him time and effort, the women came to see him in the guest hut one by one. On each occasion, he encountered a similar pattern to his experience with Esera. The women themselves seemed perfectly well, but the embryonic children inside them were in torment. Terrel approached their dream-space with more caution than he had done earlier, finding ways of protecting himself from the worst effects of the onslaught of bewildering and sometimes terrifying images that bombarded his questing mind.
Even so, it was still a gruelling task and, although he did not collapse again, he was forced to rest between sessions to try to recover his strength.
Through it all, he learnt little that he had not already cleaned from his contact with Esera. One thing that did become clear was that the further into the pregnancy the
woman was, the more bizarre and alarming was the baby's dream-world. But that in itself did not help Terrel come any closer to a possible cure. Overall, he became more and more convinced that his efforts were doomed to failure — and that impression was confirmed in dramatic fashion when he saw Parina, the woman whose pregnancy was nearest to completion. By enlisting Amie's help, and by comparing their respective methods of measuring time, Terrel knew that Parina's baby was due in approximately one median month. When he entered that dream-space, he was almost overwhelmed. It was not the rush of pain or the inexplicable sights and sounds that defeated him; it was the huge, suffocating weight of fear that consumed the emerging mind of the child. It was as though the baby knew it had been condemned to die, and was awaiting its birth as if it were its own execution. Terrel had no antidote for such unreasoning terror, and he was forced to withdraw before he too was dragged down into that fatal whirlpool of despair. He was left gasping for breath, his face sheened with sweat - which did nothing to soothe Parina's already frayed nerves. He glossed over what he had seen, wanting to spare her the details, but she knew that something was very wrong. In a sense, the most remarkable thing of all was that Parina — and the other women — seemed quite unaware of what was going on inside their own bodies.
