He brought his hand even lower, to her entrance, and felt the sweet, slick wetness there. Felt just how aroused she was by him. He was painfully hard from the sound and feel and smell of her all around him.
Sex with this woman would be amazing.
He went inside with one finger, feeling how tight she was, then with two fingers. Laurel’s eyes rolled back in pleasure as she pushed her hips into his hand, loving the feel of it.
After one or two more strokes, he moved his hand back up to her clit, eager to finish her off. By now, everything Asher did made her tense. She was so sensitive. He slowly stroked, then moved faster and faster, and her back arched and her hips rocked to move against his touch. The motion of her body was fantastic, the sight of her luscious curves moving in time with him utterly beautiful.
Asher stroked one last time, and Laurel came again, even more strongly, tensing and releasing with great force in his arms, moaning with reckless abandon, and clenching against him. It was perfection. Even as her body slowly relaxed, he could feel aftershocks of pleasure course through her that made her shudder with release.
Asher wanted to keep going. Wanted to take her all the way. But this would have to do for now.
For now?
Suddenly, Asher finally came to his senses. What the fuck was he doing? Why had he lost control like this?
Being with Laurel like this was so hot. So erotic. So perfect.
And so against everything he was supposed to be doing.
How could he have let things go this far?
“I, uh… Let’s get you inside. What do you say?” Asher said awkwardly, hoping not to ruin her afterglow, but needing space for both of them right now. If he stayed here with her much longer…
Laurel looked surprised but nodded, and he helped by rehooking her bra while she did her pants and fixed her blouse before they went outside. He instantly missed the sight of her bared to him, in spite of his deep regrets.
They left the car and were greeted by a chilly breeze. Asher took off his leather jacket and put it around her, not wanting her to get cold.
Asher walked Laurel up to the entrance to the Vale clan home behind the dojo, which was connected by a private driveway. These days it was mostly empty, just Asher and Laurel living there since Asher’s parents had moved south to warmer climates (hoping to improve his father’s health) and his two brothers were now mated and living in their own homes.
Asher unlocked the door and led Laurel in, who was still speechless.
“Asher, that was…” She trailed off.
“Good night, Laurel. See you tomorrow,” he said, trying to hide the overwhelming guilt he felt.
“Good night, Asher,” she replied, looking a little more uncertain now. “Aren’t you coming inside?”
“Not tonight.” He couldn’t risk being around her any longer. Couldn’t risk doing something irreversible to the woman that had been put under his care, under his protection.
Waving to her, he closed the door, locked it behind him, and walked back to his car, reclining the chair and trying to settle in for the night.
Asher had come too close to screwing up. Too close to ruining everything for the both of them.
Never again, he thought.
No matter how badly either of them wanted it.
4
Laurel couldn’t tell if her dreams were coming true or her nightmares were just beginning.
Last night, Asher had been the hero of her dreams, and when she’d finally confronted him about the fears that were plaguing her, that she wasn’t beautiful enough for him, that he just didn’t see her that way, he’d set her straight in the most delicious possible way.
She could still remember his hands, his scent, the safety of being held in his arms. The relief she’d felt when he’d come for her.
But she hadn’t expected him to look so upset right after they’d finished. To look as if he were trying to distance himself from her immediately. As if what they’d done hadn’t happened or was a mistake.
But maybe he’d just needed time to process things. She hoped that was the case.
Whichever, she wanted to head into the dojo early today. After last night, she was determined to work even harder on her strength. She was a good teacher, knew how to show anyone to do anything. But she wasn’t at the level of taking on multiple larger opponents, and she knew training harder wouldn’t hurt.
But also, she wanted to talk to Asher before classes. See if she could get any clarification on what had happened between them. Had it felt as right for him as it had for her?
If they were attracted to each other, and good friends—as they always had been, even if they argued—then why couldn’t they just try being together? Why did he seem so intent on denying they’d be good together?
Her hands shook slightly as she packed her bag and headed out. She was wearing yoga pants and a tight tank and had her work gi for teaching in her bag. Her curls were pulled into a tight bun to stay out of the way. She was curvy like her sister Lily, but she was in great shape and her weight didn’t change regardless. Then again, she’d heard alpha females were usually curvaceous, because curves attracted alpha males.
And last night, she’d definitely seen fire in Asher’s eyes as he’d looked them over and touched them.
Her body heated again and she took a deep breath and let it out as she went out the front door and over to her car.
When she reached the dojo, she saw Asher’s Mustang out front. Of course he would be there before anyone else.
She got her stuff out and saw him pop his dark head above the desk to see who was coming. Then he darted out of sight again.
She sighed and a small lump formed in her stomach. It looked like this wasn’t going to be easy. Then again, with Asher, nothing ever was.
She pushed open the door and the bell dinged.
Asher looked up from his work. He was seated behind the desk, disorganized piles of paperwork spread out in front of him. His short, dark hair looked ruffled, like he’d been running his fingers through it. There were slight circles under his gorgeous dark eyes, like he hadn’t slept well.
She bit her lip and hesitated at the entrance.
He looked up and pinned her with a thoughtful glare.
“Good morning, Asher,” she said.
He let out a breath of relief at her words. “Good morning, Laurel. I trust you slept well?”
She nodded, the lump in her stomach moving up to lodge in her throat. He was being so formal. Definitely trying to stay distant. “You?”
He nodded and then shook his head. “No.” He planted his hands on the desk in front of him, wrinkling the papers, and then stood up. “Something’s been bothering me. Last night, we shouldn’t have—”
She put up a hand, warding off any unwelcome words of apology. “No, Asher Vale,” she said. “You are not going to apologize for something I wanted with all of my heart. It’s always been you, Asher. Always. Ever since I was a scrawny girl of seventeen. Always.”
“Always what?” he asked. “Always had a crush?” He paced some more. “Laurel, you can choose anyone in the shifter world. There are many alphas ranked above me, and I’ve been wrong trying to keep everyone away from you. Even if I’m just trying to keep my pack promise to protect you.”
“Were you protecting me last night when we… did what we did?”
“I was protecting you from the thought that I wasn’t attracted to you. Of course I’m attracted. Any shifter in our world would fight to have you. It’s part of why I worry about you so much. But it’s also why I feel like a failure for giving in last night. I’m just supposed to protect you until you find someone from your world. Someone worthy of you who will keep you safe. I promised I would.”
That thought seemed less than pleasant to him, but she saw him shake it off and keep pacing. He wanted her. She knew he did. She just didn’t understand why he didn’t think that was okay.
“Asher, I…”
“What happened la
st night can’t happen again,” he said. “I want you. I do. But it just can’t happen. I made a promise, and if I break it, I’ll lose myself.” He shook his head, more violently this time. “But I’m going to help you. I’m going to get in touch with friends about eligible alpha males and try to vet them for you.”
“I don’t need to be controlled, Asher. I had enough of that before.”
He slumped in his chair and gestured for her to come over and join him. She did, taking a chair a few feet away.
“Maybe you know when I was younger, really young, though I always looked older for my age, I participated in an alpha challenge.”
“A what?”
He ran a hand through his hair again. “It’s an event where alpha males are invited to compete for an alpha female. Not physically, nothing like what they did with your sister, which was barbaric, but more like a chance for the alphas to get to know and impress the alpha female. Anyway, I was there, and I saw how dangerous it turned out. On the other hand, the female, Misty, found a great mate. Perhaps I just need to do something like that. Search for eligible males and invite them here.”
“At one time?” she asked doubtfully. This was sounding weird, but at the same time, she didn’t want to go out on more unsafe dates.
“No,” he said. “Just one at a time. I know you should be the one to choose, but going around to different alphas isn’t really a good idea for you. As you saw the other night. Most aren’t that barbaric, but there’s a little animal in all of us.” His dark eyes gleamed up at her. There was an animal in him, but she loved it.
But she was realizing, regardless of his reasons, he would never come to see it. And in that case, it was best to start looking at other options. The sooner she found someone, the sooner she could start trying to forget about Asher.
As if she ever could.
“So you say he has to be good enough. What qualifications do you mean?” she asked skeptically.
He pushed a piece of paper toward her. There were messily scrawled notes on them, but he read them off to her. “Good with money. Prestigious family and good character. Known for kindness with pack and family. Strong. Full alpha.”
She pushed it back to him. “Don’t you fit all of these, too?” she asked. She looked up at him shyly. “Especially strong.”
He coughed. “Not prestigious. Not compared to some. Not half as rich as some either.”
“I don’t need money,” she said stubbornly.
“Damn it, what do you want, then?” he asked, throwing up his hands in disgust.
“I think you saw it last night, and I keep trying to tell you this, Asher Vale. I want you.”
He sighed. “That’s just not going to happen. Despite my stupid actions last night, despite me wanting you, that just can’t happen.”
“Why not?” she asked.
He pursed his full lips in a tight line. “Because I can’t break my pack promise. I’d lose all respect for myself if I did.”
Her face tightened. She didn’t know what to say to that. A few moments went by in silence.
“So if the right guy walked in, with everything on that list, and I was good with him, you’d let me go?” she asked hesitantly.
He nodded, eyes looking slightly haunted. “I would have no choice.”
“But you would want that?”
He nodded again. “I want you to be happy. It’s been my goal for four years. To see you happy.”
She nodded. “Because I think the solution to your problem might be about to walk in the door.”
Asher whipped around in that direction and she heard a sharp intake of air. “Damn, we aren’t even open yet. Do you know him?”
She studied the tall, muscled, well-dressed blond walking to the door and looking at the hours. Then he looked over at her. She’d know that handsome face anywhere, even if she hadn’t seen him in years. Even if he was part of her past life, a life she had no intention of returning to.
“Dane,” she said, so caught up in watching that she didn’t see the intense glare on Asher’s face.
* * *
The man at the door was grade-A douchebag. Asher just had no way of proving it.
He was tall, maybe even an inch or so taller than Asher, though not as broad through the chest and shoulders. His perfect blond hair was swept to the side in a part. He wore clothing that looked like he’d stepped out of a catalogue of how to look like an expensive douchebag.
His bearing was that of an alpha male. A high-class alpha male. The type that rubbed elbows with the tribunal, the ruling class of wolves, or really rich wolves like Laurel’s father.
Not someone who’d worked his way up from the bottom, like Asher’s family had.
Laurel’s father had been blessed with two alpha daughters, but instead of treasuring them, he’d controlled their lives in an effort to use their status to better his own.
The thought made Asher sick. He thought the whole alpha system was bullshit sometimes. His older brothers were looked down on because they were half-blood, but they were some of the toughest badasses he knew.
After the alpha challenge Asher had gone to, he’d come home and determined to work hard and take care of the dojo. He’d never planned on trying to mate another alpha female. As long as he found the right mate, it didn’t matter what her blood was. And alpha females were too much trouble anyway.
Then one had been dropped right in his care. And she’d been trouble all right. But he’d grown as a man in his responsibility to protect her. She’d changed his life for the better, helped him build the dojo.
It’d be a poor way of paying her back, taking advantage of her feelings to mate her and giving her a life with a low-ranking alpha like him.
He’d promised to protect her like the treasure she was, not take the treasure for himself.
He knew she thought she had feelings for him. But it was puppy love, like how she’d debated whether he or his brother Jordan was hotter when she first moved in at seventeen.
After everyone else had moved on, he’d been the only option. She hadn’t been around many males. Especially high-caliber ones. And Asher had done a poor job of helping her find them, rather than just chasing off the low-grade ones she said yes to.
Maybe a part of him had been trying to keep her to himself.
But he had no choice now. Last night had made that abundantly clear. Laurel was a beautiful woman who was ready to take the next step in her life, and she needed a partner and protector who was at her level. Someone like she would’ve had if she’d stayed in her world. Someone rich, strong, with good connections.
She deserved better than a life in a dirty old dojo, teaching shifters how to fight. She deserved the best the shifter world had to offer. Unlike him, she could reach for it.
She deserved something like the blond douche waving merrily at them from behind the glass.
“Should I let him in?” she asked.
“Who is he?” Asher said.
“A childhood friend,” she said vaguely.
Was that wistfulness in her voice? The thought made jealousy rage inside him, but as usual, he forced it down. He didn’t deserve her and he would stay out of the way until she found someone who did.
“Sure, let him in.” He shuffled his papers and tucked his notes on possible suitors out of sight. “Maybe he’s the answer to all our problems.”
She frowned thoughtfully. “Maybe.”
A little flame of hope leapt in Asher. Maybe she didn’t want the douche.
But as she nearly skipped to the door to open it, Asher thought maybe she could actually like the dude.
He didn’t like that at all.
Despite the fact that it was everything he’d told himself he should want for her, despite all the years saying when someone worthy came along, he’d be able to step back, the sight of this man made him want to step forward and claim her for his own. More than ever before.
He sank his face into his hands and sighed. Damn, life was confusing.
/> When Laurel opened the door, the douche walked forward and pulled her into a hug. Her laughter as he swung her in an arc, lifting her off the ground, grated on Asher’s nerves.
She should be in his arms. She should be his mate. She should…
Damn, damn, damn! Damn that pack promise to his brother and damn himself for falling for someone he couldn’t have.
Now that he’d touched her, scented her (and he knew he was a bastard for doing it, but after rescuing her, his wolf had been close to the surface), he was surer than ever.
She was his. And when he fulfilled his duty and gave her the life she deserved with another man, there would be a hole in his heart that would never be filled.
He’d just have to try to forget.
He cleared his throat, and they turned his direction. The douche set her down, and she smoothed her clothing. The man sent Asher a bright, flashing smile that only made him angrier.
He would not like him. He would not.
“You must be Asher Vale,” he said, walking straight over and sticking his hand out for Asher to shake it. It was lightly tanned, with no callouses to be seen. Asher just glared at it as he stood and walked around the desk.
The man was just pulling his hand back when Asher reached out and took it, squeezing it hard, maybe a bit more than necessary if truth be told. “Seems like you know our Laurel,” Asher said, sizing the man up with his eyes.
The man had light-blue eyes, calm and placid like a summer sky. But there was something about him…
Asher didn’t think it was just his jealousy, but he couldn’t be sure…
“That I do,” the man said, looking down at his hand, which Asher wasn’t releasing. Finally, Asher let go. The man walked back and put an arm around Laurel’s shoulders, and Asher immediately regretted it. “Me and her go way back.”
Another chill of anger ran up Asher’s spine, but he stifled it. This was what he wanted. He had no right to be upset just because the perfect man walked right in rather than waiting for Asher to find him. Laurel was a grown woman, and if this was what she wanted, he would be happy for her.
Somehow.
Alpha Protector (Wolf Protectors Book 3) Page 4
