by D. S. Butler
The waitress bought over my prawn and avocado salad and Luke’s pan-fried chicken and sweet potato mash.
After the waitress left us, Luke asked, “When are you going to tell me what this lunch is really about?” His eyes were kind, but he wasn’t teasing anymore.
I shrugged and tried to inject humour in my tone when I said, “It’s just lunch. You should be thankful I’m feeling generous and enjoy it.”
He gave me a mock salute and began to eat his chicken.
“I don’t suppose you’ve spoken to Phil since I saw him the other day?” I tried to sound nonchalant but failed miserably. I grabbed my glass of sparkling water and took a gulp to hide my nerves.
Luke shook his head. “No, not yet. It’s not the kind of thing I wanted to ask him about over the phone. I thought I would see him at the weekend.”
I nodded. “Good idea.”
I put down my glass of water and then smoothed my napkin over my lap again nervously.
“After what happened with his wife and daughter, he must have been pushed very close to the edge.”
Luke watched me carefully, but I refused to raise my gaze and meet his. Instead, I stabbed a piece of avocado with my fork, focusing on my salad as though it was the most fascinating thing in the world.
“He was devastated,” Luke said simply, and I could hear the pain in his voice over the loss of his sister-in-law and niece as well as for his distraught brother.
Why did Luke have to be so nice? He was making digging for information really difficult.
“After I saw him in Oxford the other day and he reacted so strangely it made me wonder…”
Luke stopped eating, put his knife and fork down and waited for me to continue.
Surely there was a better way to phrase this. There had to be some way I could ask him questions about Phil without sounding like I suspected his brother of one of the worst crimes imaginable.
“Well, it got me thinking. I mean, Jenna and Isabel looked very like, didn’t they?”
“I don’t think I like where this is going, Beth. Tell me what you mean.”
My insides were in knots as I met Luke’s gaze. “Maybe he took Jenna because she reminded him so much of Isabel.”
“What the hell? What planet are you on, Beth? Phil would never do anything like that.”
I bid a hasty retreat, nodding frantically. “I know, I know. But his strange reaction to me made me think and…” I wasn’t making any sense and was digging an even deeper hole.
“You know Phil. You must know he could never do anything like that.”
How well do we ever really know anyone? The Philip Bowman I knew from years ago was very different from the man he was today. I leant forward across the table.
“I don’t know him. I used to know him, but I don’t know him that well anymore. I can’t say what he would or wouldn’t do.”
The look of hurt on Luke’s face made my throat tighten. I reached for my water and took another gulp, but it didn’t ease the dryness in my mouth.
“People don’t change that much, Beth. No matter what you might think, he is the same person underneath. There is no way my brother would have taken Jenna. He knew more than anyone what it was like to lose a daughter. He would never put anyone else through that.”
Sure, what Luke said made sense, but Phil was his brother so he was bound to take his side. I had to admit Phil was unlikely to be involved in Jenna’s disappearance but my suspicions wouldn’t go away.
“But he moved away shortly afterwards. And he’s got a place in London where nobody knows him… I mean, have you even seen his new place?”
“Yes,” Luke replied loudly, and the people at the next table turned to look at us in surprise. He lowered his voice. “You are being ridiculous, Beth. What’s got into you?”
He pushed his chair away from the table, and for a moment, I thought he was going to storm off, but he said, “I am going to the gents’. When I come back, you are going to tell me what has put this crazy idea into your head.”
I swallowed hard and put my head in my hands as he walked past me.
The last thing I wanted to do was upset Luke, but ignoring my suspicions was impossible. They were like an itch that demanded to be scratched. If I didn’t find out more about Phil, I would never know if there was something more I could have done to find Jenna if only I’d addressed the right questions to the right people.
I reached for the bottle of sparkling mineral water to top up my glass and that’s when I noticed Luke had left his mobile phone on the table.
I didn’t know where Philip lived, but Luke probably had his address in the contacts list in his phone. I stared at the phone. What harm would it do? I could get Phil’s address, just to scope it out. I’d soon see if he had a child living with him and no one needed to get hurt. No one would find out. It was the easiest way to end my suspicions.
Before I could talk myself out of it, I reached forward and snatched up the phone. With my pulse quickening, I pressed the central button, hoping I’d be quick enough to get the address before Luke returned.
I mumbled a curse under my breath when I realised the phone was locked, and I didn’t know the pass code.
I put the phone back on the table and felt thoroughly miserable. What was I doing? This was Luke. One of the people I trusted most in the world. And I was trying to… God knows what I was trying to do.
What sort of person was I?
When Luke returned, I couldn’t look at him. I felt cruel, evil and a thoroughly nasty person for even entertaining those thoughts about his brother. I didn’t want Luke to think badly of me and needed him to understand. Although I’d told nobody about the photograph of Jenna outside my Mum, Daniel and the police, I knew I had to confide in Luke. It was the only thing that would stop him thinking I was a nutcase.
After I had finished explaining, the angry expression on his face melted away, and he unclenched his jaw.
“Oh, Beth, you should have told me.”
“The police told us that the less people who know, the better. They don’t want the information getting out and interfering with the investigation. You know, people phoning up and saying they know things when they don’t, giving them loads of false leads to sift through like last time.”
“So that’s why Phil acting oddly made you put two and two together and come up with five.”
I opened my mouth to dispute that but then thought better of it. I wasn’t going to persuade Luke that his own brother had been involved, and I didn’t want to create a rift between us by arguing my point.
He reached across the table and put his hand over mine. “You do know that Phil would never have done anything to hurt Jenna.”
I shook my head wearily. “I never thought he’d hurt her, but it would be understandable if he’d reached his breaking point and because they looked so similar….”
Luke shook his head. “No, absolutely not. He wouldn’t. And you have to know that if for one second I suspected he had, I wouldn’t protect him.”
I nodded. “I know. Look, don’t mention the photograph to anyone, especially not Phil. I don’t want him to know I thought…”
“Of course, I won’t mention it to anyone,” Luke promised.
We finished our lunch. I only picked at my salad, but Luke cleared his plate. He asked me a couple more questions about the investigation, mostly concerning Robin Vaughan, and he was disappointed to hear the police didn’t have much on him at all.
“It’s a bit of a coincidence that he was there at the fête on the day it happened,” Luke said, echoing what Mum and I had already mentioned to the police.
“I know. We just have to be patient and see what they can dig up, but waiting is not easy.”
That was the understatement of the century, I thought, as I turned to signal the waitress and ask for the bill.
After the bill was settled, we left the restaurant, and outside, I said goodbye to Luke. I’d only taken a couple of steps when I spotted someo
ne standing motionless on the other side of the road.
Dawn Parsons.
I shivered. She was staring at me, a blank expression on her round face. For a moment, on the edge of the pavement, I hesitated. Why was she just staring at me like that? Was she trying to intimidate me?
I’d had enough of her creepy spying. I took a step off the pavement only to reel back at the blast of a car horn. A car had pulled out of a parking space and accelerated far too fast, almost plowing into me. Shaken, I stared after the blue Astra as a young girl with red streaks in her hair asked me if I was okay.
“I’m fine, thanks. The car seemed to come out of nowhere.”
She scrunched up her nose and made a rude signal at the driver, who’d already reached the junction with the main road. “They were driving far too fast.”
I nodded. “Yes, I’m lucky the car didn’t hit me,” I said, although I was shaking and didn’t feel particularly lucky.
“My heart was in my mouth when I saw you step out. It’s a miracle the car didn’t hit you.”
I managed to smile and nod in agreement as the young woman said goodbye and went on her way. I scanned the other side of the street for Dawn, but there was no sign of her.
She had disappeared.
Chapter Twenty-Six
It’s just for my own peace of mind, I muttered to myself as the Paddington train clattered over the tracks, heading towards London.
Fortunately, it had been easy to track down Phil Bowman. At first, I had been furious with myself for not remembering where Phil worked because I was sure Luke had told me during one of our conversations. Luke mentioned something about a university, but I couldn’t recall which one. In the end, it didn’t matter. A quick Google search soon told me he was working at Imperial College, even helpfully listing the department and building number.
My plan, if I could even call it that, was to wait for him to finish work today and see what he did and where he went. Of course, just seeing Phil again wouldn’t be enough to rule out the possibility that he’d played a role in Jenna’s abduction, but following him home, should give me the opportunity to see if he was living alone. A big confrontation with Luke’s brother was the last thing I wanted.
Speaking to him directly would be a bad idea. I really didn’t want this getting back to Luke. It was better for everybody if Luke believed I’d dropped the matter completely.
In all honesty, I really did want to believe Luke. The thought that somebody I knew had taken Jenna was sickening, but on the other hand, if Phil had taken her, it was very unlikely she’d be hurt.
Much of what Luke had said over lunch made perfect sense. If anyone had asked me a few years ago whether Phil Bowman could have abducted a child, I would have insisted he couldn’t.
But things were different now. I knew better than anyone how grief could twist your mind and play havoc with your thought process.
I leant back in my seat and gazed out of the large window as the train sped past open fields. It was nice to get away from Woodstock for a few hours.
Catching Dawn Parsons watching me earlier had set me on edge. Almost getting knocked over by a car had stopped me confronting her there and then, but I had half a mind to head over to her house when I’d finished in London. Mum would definitely not approve of that, though, and she would be horrified if she found out what I was up to this afternoon. In fact, I didn’t want anyone to find out what I was doing because they’d assume I’d gone crazy.
Maybe I was crazy. My actions were ridiculous, but I couldn’t rule Phil Bowman out without making sure, and following him home was one way to ease my worries without everybody thinking I was losing my marbles.
It didn’t take me long to get from Paddington to the science building where Phil worked, and although the University had been helpful enough to list his lectures online, I didn’t know what time he would be finishing today. His scheduled lectures ended at four PM, but he could have other meetings or work that kept him later. My only option was to wait.
There was a bus stop nearby, and I stood beside it, trying to blend in, keeping a close eye on the glass double doors at the entrance. I hoped there wasn’t another way out. If there was, I could miss him, and my crazy plan would be over before it started.
I’d made it to London by three thirty and thought I had a good chance to catch him as he left work.
Bus after bus departed as I waited. The minutes ticked past, giving me time to think and realise how foolish my plan was. What if Phil recognised me? Would I really be able to follow him all the way home without him noticing? If he took a bus, there was no chance I’d be able to follow without him spotting me. If he’d driven to work, I didn’t stand a chance.
I let out a frustrated sigh. Why hadn’t I considered that? But parking spaces were at a premium in central London, and surely, university staff weren’t that well-paid. There were only a few parking spaces outside the front of the building. My gaze shifted from the entrance to the side of the building, trying to see if there were another, larger car park. But there was nothing except more buildings.
My heart sank as I looked further to my left. A bicycle rack jammed full of a variety of bikes, old and new, racing bikes with drop handles along with more practical road bikes. Great, Philip had cycled everywhere when he lived in Woodstock and Oxford. If he’d cycled here today, I might as well leave now. There was no way I would be able to keep up with him. This was a waste of time.
A large bin lorry rumbled past, followed by a black cab, with an irate driver. I took a step back as they pulled closer to the kerb. Cycling in central London carried certain risks. The heavy traffic would deter all but the most dedicated cyclists, and surely Phil wouldn’t enjoy cycling here. My spirits lifted a little, and I leant back against the bus shelter as yet another red double-decker bus pulled to a stop in front of me and the passengers filed off.
A man with messy hair, a patchy beard and a grubby-looking jacket shuffled up to me. He’d been waiting at the other end of the shelter and had been here longer than I had. I guessed he wasn’t here to wait for a bus either.
“Whatcha doing?”
I shook my head and avoided eye contact, not wanting to get into a conversation. “I’m waiting for someone.”
The man hitched up his baggy trousers and nodded thoughtfully. “Me too. But they don’t come. They never come.”
I didn’t know how to respond so said nothing. Looking back over my shoulder, I saw a group of students exit the building, but there was still no sign of Phil Bowman.
“Spare a quid for a cup of tea, love?”
I turned back to the man and guessed he must have fallen on hard times. Shoving my hands in the pockets of my jeans, I pulled out some coins. My purse was safely tucked away in my handbag, but I never carried much cash with me anyway. I’d had the foresight to purchase an Oyster card just in case Phil used public transport to get home. Handing over a handful of change that probably only amounted to about two pounds earned me a toothy grin.
“Cheers, love. I hope he turns up soon, whoever he is.”
“Thanks,” I said and turned back to watch the glass front doors.
By the time six p.m. came around, I was starting to lose hope. I tapped out a text message to Mum, telling her I’d be late home as I had to pop into London for something. The message I sent was vague, but I would have to come up with a better explanation on my way home.
I was just tucking my phone back into my handbag when I saw him.
Phil Bowman. He wore light brown trousers and a heavy tweed jacket, not really suitable for the warm May weather we were experiencing at the moment. His floppy, fair hair fell forward over his forehead, and he wore his usual rimless glasses.
He was heading straight for me.
I froze, shrinking back behind the shelter, wishing it wasn’t made from see-through Perspex. Luckily for me, he walked right past without a second glance. I let out a shaky breath and set off in pursuit.
If he turned around, I plann
ed to act surprised and pretend I just happened to be in the area. Okay, so that was stretching belief a little bit, but he wouldn’t be able to prove otherwise, and as long as Luke didn’t find out, I would be in the clear. To start with, I kept my distance, but I was terrified of losing him. As we walked away from the University, the number of people jostling on the pavement increased, and I had to get closer or risk losing him.
I bit down on my lower lip, concentrating on the top of Phil’s fair head, as I weaved through the crowds of people and tried to keep sight of him. He took a sudden right, heading down into an underground station. I followed him, rummaging through my handbag for my Oyster card, not daring to take my eyes off Phil.
How on earth would I follow him onto the same platform and then get on the same train without him noticing me? I should have at least worn a hat or something. Luckily, the platform was busy, and I managed to wedge myself amongst a large group of colourfully-dressed, foreign tourists. I could keep an eye on Phil from my place in the crowd without him spotting me.
The train rolled up to the platform less than thirty seconds later, but I didn’t dare get on the same carriage as him. Instead, I picked the next one along and slumped down into a seat. Through the grimy window, I watched him look around the carriage.
He remained standing, swaying a little as the underground train jerked along the track towards the dark tunnel, but he didn’t bother to hold on to the metal pole or the handhold loops that dropped down from the ceiling. He was a seasoned underground traveller.
I shifted to the side as somebody sat down in the seat beside me, but I didn’t pay them any attention. Clutching my handbag to my chest, I bit down on my thumbnail and watched Phil in the next carriage.
He stared straight ahead, not really looking at anything, but seemingly lost in thought. Unlike the other people in his carriage, he didn’t pull out his phone and study the screen. I wondered whether any of them got a signal down here. As the train rumbled into the next station, I held my breath and leant forward, ready to get off the train quickly if Phil disembarked. But he didn’t.
