by Ivy Jordan
“In a minute,” I smiled, hoping to see Lark before the meeting began.
Everyone started to arrive, and of course, Lark was the last one to pull in. I gripped her arm tightly, filled her in on the anxiety I was feeling, and waited for her to tell me I was being foolish.
“You just need to ask him,” she said. What the fuck was that? How was that helpful?
“Don’t you think that might freak him out?” I asked.
“It’s weird that you guys live together. But if you didn’t, would you be this concerned, this quickly?” she asked.
No. I wouldn’t. “So, he could still be dating other women while we’re dating, and living together?” I sighed, realizing just how messed up that truly would be.
“I mean, yeah. I guess. But he wasn’t dating anyone before you, so why would he now?” she asked, wrinkling her nose at me.
A couple of the girls came out, insisting we get inside and get started.
Everything was perfect, especially Theo. He was a natural, and the camera loved him. I noticed Jeanette giving him little glances, and a couple smirks that she appeared to think were hidden from anyone else’s view. It was like they had an inside secret. How long was I outside waiting on Lark?
At the end of the night, I noticed a bracket was missing from my lens mount. I knelt down on the floor, searching for the small black piece on the dark carpet when Theo snuck up behind me. “What did you lose?” he asked.
As I explained to him what the part looked like, Jeanette was already on his tail. “Oh no,” she exclaimed, even that appeared fake.
After searching for several minutes, I decided it wasn’t worth it. “It’s not that expensive. I’ll just order a new one,” I said, calling off the search.
I’d had enough time on the floor with Jeanette and her fake expressions. I didn’t care if it was a thousand dollars to replace; it would be worth it to escape from her.
Jeanette pulled Theo away as soon as the hunt was over, showing him the photos she’d taken of him the last time he’d modeled.
Watching the two of them together, smiling, leaning over one another’s shoulders, it was disgusting.
Lark had a client meeting, so she was already gone, leaving me to deal with my irrational feelings alone. When I watched Jeanette whisper something in Theo’s ear, tiptoeing to reach it, I was filled with jealousy. When she handed him a white piece of torn paper, most likely her number, I was filled with rage. But, when Theo put that paper into his back pocket, giving the room a once-over to make sure he wasn’t seen, I was filled with heartache. It was a familiar feeling, one I’d never wanted to feel again.
Jeanette left, waving at me from the door. My hand barely hit the air for her weak goodbye wave. That bitch!
I was an idiot. Why did I believe he’d be any different? He wasn’t going to commit, not when he had so many women fawning over him everywhere he went.
Theo stacked the chairs, and folded the tables, pushing them against the wall while I packed up my equipment. “You ready?” he asked, a smile wide on his face. Yeah, you have plenty to be happy about, don’t you, playboy?
My stomach churned at the thought of Theo having his way with me tonight, only to have his way with Jeanette tomorrow night, and whoever else the night after that. “Yeah,” I snipped, my tone short and cold.
If he flinched at my screech, I hadn’t noticed. I tossed my bag over my shoulder and headed for the door. I held it open while he walked out, and then locked up without saying a word.
“I’ll follow you home. Unless you want to stop somewhere?” he suggested as we walked to our cars.
“There’s nowhere else I need or want to be. If you have somewhere in mind, or someone, don’t let me stop you. No need for any favors,” I tightened my lips and squinted my eyes.
“Whoa,” he gasped, backing up a step as I climbed into my car. “What the hell is wrong with you?” he asked.
“I saw Jeanette throwing herself at you, and you loving every second of it. You have her number in your back pocket. Why don’t you just call her? She obviously doesn’t mind sharing,” I snapped, slamming my car door.
“Wow. You’re a nut case, Willow,” he said with surprise.
“You’re right. I am nuts for believing you’d be any different. I told you, all musicians are the same,” I scolded.
“I’ll see you at home,” Theo said, shaking his head as he walked away from my car.
Mac had the same way of making me feel like the crazy one when he fucked me over. Not this time. He may not have been caught with a pair of red lips around his cock, but given time, he would’ve been. They’re all the same.
Chapter Eight
I kept checking my rearview mirror for Theo, but he wasn’t behind me. My heart felt heavy in my chest as I pulled into the parking spot in front of his house, our house. His car wasn’t there.
A cold shower cooled me off a little and left me with a clear mind. This feeling I got in the pit of my stomach with Theo was the same one I’d gotten with Mac towards the end. I wasn’t sure that it’d ever go away, or that I’d ever trust him. Lark was right: if we weren’t living together, I wouldn’t be pushing for a label on our relationship this soon. And, if we weren’t living together, I’d never have gotten close enough to him to develop feelings. He would’ve been left on stage for his groupies to fight over.
Lark answered after three rings. “Are you done with your meeting?” I asked.
“Yes. On my way home now; what’s up?” she asked.
I hesitated, partly to figure out what to say, and partly to fight back my tears. “It’s Theo,” I finally gasped.
“What happened?” she asked with concern.
I told her the whole story, from front to back. She didn’t offer any advice while I spoke, letting me get everything off my chest first, which I appreciated. “Willow, what if he was just being polite after being put on the spot and took the number?” she asked.
“If he didn’t want to tell her he had a girlfriend, or that he’s seeing someone, then he doesn’t, he isn’t,” I scoffed.
“I get that. But, these are your friends. Have you told Benny, Samson, or Paul about you two?” she asked.
“No,” I admitted, feeling that burning in my stomach return.
“He may have told you about it later and let you handle it how you wanted,” she advised, making me feel even worse.
I sighed, taking in everything she said, and trying to put myself in his shoes. “No. If one of his buddies came onto me, I would at the very least say I was seeing someone, period,” I insisted.
Lark was a hopeless romantic, but I was a realist. There was no gray area to this topic. It was black or white, right or wrong.
“What are you gonna do about your living situation?” she asked.
The burning pit in my stomach grew like a forest fire after a long, hot summer drought. “I guess I’ll talk to him. If having sex is a stipulation for living here, then I’ll move,” I said sternly.
I didn’t want to move. The thought of moving made me ill. But, the thought of staying, and not being with Theo, that made me ill, too.
“Can you handle that?” Lark asked.
I couldn’t. I knew that, and she knew that.
“It doesn’t matter. If he’ll let me stay, I’ll have to try,” I sighed.
My phone beeped with a call from an unknown number. “I’m getting a call,” I told Lark, quickly saying our goodbyes.
I clicked over to the waiting call. “Hello?”
“Is this Willow Banks?” a woman asked.
“Yes, it is. How can I help you?” I asked.
“We’re having a family reunion in the Hamptons with everyone arriving tomorrow morning and staying for two days. I realize this is short notice, but our photographer canceled last minute and a mutual friend gave me your number,” she explained.
“Would you need me there for the entire three days?” I asked.
It was an unusual request, but not unheard of.
People with money found millions of ways to squander it, including hiring a professional to photograph their day at the zoo. “Yes. There are six generations, all showing up this year. I’m afraid for the oldest generation it will likely be their last trip. We just thought it would be special to have those precious last moments together memorialized in photos that we could all share,” she said.
The thought of leaving without talking to Theo both upset me and gave me pleasure. Let him suffer, wondering where I’m at. But, then again, he may decide to throw me out while I’m gone.
I needed time to think, regardless. And after our spat, we both could use some time apart. “Yes. I’d be delighted to do it,” I agreed.
We worked out the details with payment, accommodations, and transportation, and then hung up. I was to leave early tomorrow morning with a car service picking me up to deliver me by nine.
I called Lark back, told her about the job, and she agreed that time apart might do us both some good. She was still hopeful this would all work out, but I was done. I couldn’t continue to torture myself any longer.
Every car door, every set of headlights, brought me to the window looking for Theo. Each time, it wasn’t him.
It was getting late, and I’d convinced myself he was out with someone else, probably Jeanette. I had given up hope of seeing him before I left at six in the morning for the Hamptons when the doorbell rang.
I’d been there a month, and it was the first time I’d heard the customized ‘Stairway to Heaven’ tone from inside the house. It may be the last, Willow.
I opened the door to find Benny on my stoop with an obviously drunk Theo leaning against the red brick entrance. “I’m sorry, Willow. I don’t know what’s going on, but he just kept saying you told him not to come home,” Benny explained, helping Theo inside.
Theo grinned when our eyes met, a vindictive grin, not one I’d consider friendly. “You need a shower, man,” Benny said, offering me an apologetic glance before helping Theo up the stairs.
I heard the water running, and bottles falling from the shelves to the shower floor. After a few minutes, the water stopped, and I could hear voices coming from the top of the stairs. I felt helpless down there while Benny helped Theo. I hated to see him in that shape, and even though I was still angry, I ached for his pain to go away.
Benny came downstairs after about thirty minutes. “Wow. I haven’t seen him that drunk since his twenty-first birthday,” he sighed, falling onto the couch beside me. “What happened between you two?” he asked.
“We’ve been—uh….” I stammered.
“I know. That’s all he’s talked about,” Benny laughed.
I was surprised that he knew, and that Theo had talked about it, about us. “I’ve been burned by his type before,” I said quickly.
“His type?” he asked, his eyebrows lifting high on his forehead.
I swallowed hard, realizing the type was musicians, and Benny was one as well. One that was about to be married.
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean any disrespect to you or Kayla. It’s just, Theo has a lot of temptations surrounding him, and I worried he couldn’t handle them. Today, I witnessed that he couldn’t,” I explained.
Benny looked surprised, his eyebrows still lifted high on his face, and his eyes widened. “Wow. That surprises even me. I’ve known Theo a long time, and that’s just not his style. Are you sure you saw what you saw?” he asked.
I forced a smile. “I saw what I saw.”
It was too familiar. Mac with his pants undone, a brunette on her knees when I caught him backstage after a gig; it was the same thing. “It’s not what it looks like, baby,” Mac said. Ugh. I was over having a man tell me I was crazy, that I didn’t see what I knew I saw.
“Well, maybe talk to him and work it out. Like I said, I’ve known Theo for a long time. He’s a good guy, one of the last good ones. Give him a chance to explain, at least. He’s been so happy. It just blows my mind that he’d do anything to destroy that,” Benny said softly, standing from the couch.
He opened his arms and gave me a big hug. “Talk to him, before it gets out of hand,” he suggested.
“I have to go out of town in the morning for work. I’ll be gone a few days,” I said, concerned now that maybe I hadn’t seen what I thought I saw. No. Don’t get sucked in, Willow. But Benny was right. I did need to talk to Theo.
“Well. He’s pretty drunk now. Maybe you’ll have time in the morning,” he said, giving me a quick hug before heading out the door.
I turned off all the lights and headed upstairs. It was late, and I had to be up early, but if Theo was awake, I’d at least let him know my plans.
Upstairs, Theo’s loud snores echoed down the halls. I peeked in his room, finding him lying on his back wearing only a pair of basketball shorts and his hair still wet from the shower.
His abs rippled down his chest like a beautiful ocean tide that I wanted to swim in. My heart fluttered as I stared at the man I’d fallen for, and the one who had made me fall for his lies.
A part of me still wanted to crawl into bed with him, to curl up and feel his warmth. I walked into the room quietly, pulled the blankets over Theo, and fought the urge to lean in and give him a kiss on those perfect lips.
I started to walk away when a grip tightened around my wrist, pulling me back towards the bed. “I love you,” Theo mumbled, his eyes barely open.
My heart ached, wanting to fall into his arms. His eyes fell closed again, and the snores continued.
Chapter Nine
My eyes were itchy and red. I hadn’t had much sleep after packing, and then writing, and rewriting Theo’s note several times.
I glanced into his room, setting my suitcase by the door. He was still snoring. I tiptoed into the room, placed the note on his nightstand, and took one last look at his beautiful face. It’s no wonder I’d fallen for him. He was gorgeous.
The driver was chatty, something I wasn’t ready for so early in the morning. I made an excuse that I had to work while we drove and settled into the backseat of the black Escalade with my tablet, playing Farmville instead of actually working.
The Hamptons were beautiful when we arrived a couple hours later. Traffic wasn’t bad, since it was still early in the year. Most New Yorkers didn’t flock to the area until the summer heat became unbearable in the city.
I settled into my hotel, contacted my client, and made arrangements to meet them at their beach house in an hour after freshening up.
It was late enough that Theo would be awake, and he would’ve already seen my note. I couldn’t help but wonder what was going through his mind. Did he even care that I was gone?
I called Lark, gave her the update on my whereabouts, and asked her to keep an eye on Theo while I was gone. I wanted to make sure he was okay. “You’re in love with him,” she said softly.
“No. I care about him. It doesn’t matter, anyway. Just please make sure he’s okay,” I scoffed, hanging up after she promised.
Love. Did I love Theo? My heart knew the answer to that, but my mind wouldn’t allow me to say it aloud, or even admit it silently.
A driver waited for me outside my hotel to bring me to the beach house where I’d photograph six generations enjoying a holiday while my heart broke in two. I’d keep a smile on my face, be kind, and remain professional, even though I wanted to curl up in bed with chick flicks and eat ice cream from the carton for the next two days.
My phone rang as I frantically searched for it in my bag. Assuming it was the client assuring I was on schedule, I slid answer without even looking at the number.
“Where are you?” Theo’s voice sounded irritable and scratchy.
“I left a note,” I said quickly, surprised to hear his voice.
“Yeah. So, you’re really in the Hamptons on work?” he asked.
“Yes. I received the call last night. After what happened between us, I figured it was best to create some distance,” I sighed, struggling to keep my tears from flooding m
y eyes.
“I thought you just took off because of me,” he grumbled.
It was partly because of him, that was true. It was a great opportunity, but I was looking so forward to our night and our entire day together. I would’ve turned it down in a heartbeat if things hadn’t ended as they did.
“I’m sorry things turned out the way they did, Theo. I will look for a place when I get back,” I said.
“You’re moving out?” he asked, his voice sounding angry.
“It’s for the best. I don’t think we can go back to being just roommates. It’s not fair to either of us,” I explained.
“Where are you staying?” he asked.
I hesitated.
“In case I need you for something, or need to get in touch with you,” he added quickly.
I gave him the information and told him I had to go. I wiped my eyes, worked my features into a friendly smile, and stepped out of the car to meet the family I’d be spending my next three days with.
Everyone was gracious, especially Elizabeth Channing, the woman I’d spoken with on the phone. I spent the next couple hours meeting family members as they arrived, taking note of their names, and trying to find ways to put a name with each face to make it easy to remember. There were over ninety people that arrived that day, including the kids, all staying in adjacent beach houses. It was going to be a lot of work. More than I’d realized when I’d agreed to take this on.
It would be good to keep my mind off Theo. At least I’d be staying busy.
Mrs. Channing offered for me to stay for dinner, but it felt awkward to be an outsider in such a large family. “Thank you, but I’d like to organize the photos I’ve taken,” I excused myself until morning.
Once I returned to the hotel, I drew a hot bath, pouring the complimentary bubble bath into the water. Even though I’d stayed busy all day with the droves of people to meet, scenes to photograph, and stories to listen to, Theo still managed to enter my mind quite a bit.
The hot water soothed my aches, all but the one in my heart. Every time I closed my eyes, leaning back into the water to relax, I saw Theo. His body, so toned and muscular, lying on the bed uncovered before I’d left that morning. I could hear his voice, the anger and irritation within it from when he called. I don’t know why, but it bothered me that he didn’t ask me to stay when I said I’d look for a place. Did I want him to beg me to stay? If he did, would I?
