by India Lee
“It’s a great place in general,” Tyler said, rising to his feet to shake David’s hand. “This was such an great experience. Thank you again, David.” Gemma gave David a hug goodbye before allowing Andro to lead them out through a back exit. As they wove through the winding halls and ducked through beaded curtains, Gemma and Tyler passed a few of the other restaurant patrons. Most were too engrossed in grilling their own food, but those who looked up and saw them gave no more than a polite nod of recognition. But as Gemma felt the rush of crisp air coming from the open door at the end of the hall, one person held her stare for longer than usual. It was a familiar face but in the dark, Gemma couldn’t be sure of who she was. But just as suddenly, it was totally clear. Her once lithe figure was carrying a few extra pounds and her wild, rainbow-streaked hair was replaced with a single-toned, shoulder-length cut.
“Harper?” Gemma gasped, freezing in place. “What are you doing here? I thought you were in New York!”
“I’m visiting,” Harper replied simply. She smiled stiffly at Tyler and held her hand out to shake his. Gemma shook her head in disbelief.
“How long have you been here?” Tyler asked, equally stunned. “You should’ve given us a call so we could’ve all gone out or something.”
“It hasn’t been that long. But hey, look, I need to go,” Harper said, abruptly. She swung her purse onto her shoulder and cut in front of them to head out the door. “And can you not tell Zoe I was here? Thanks.”
~
“Aunt Mira, it’s her.” Gemma was certain in her words. “It’s got to be. She’s always had something against me, and what do you know, this whole time she’s been in L.A. without telling any of us! Isn’t this all coming together for you? Is it not totally suspicious that she would do that?” Gemma demanded into the phone as she paced back and forth in Tyler’s living room. He was out recording for the day and she had too much nervous energy on her own to keep still.
“Listen, honey. The Harper you ran into last night is not the same Harper that you knew last year. She’s changed and she’s in L.A. just to gather some old things and say goodbye to the life that she had there. If I’m telling you that, you should believe me,” Mira responded rationally. “Since she came back from rehab, she’s been nothing but responsible. You know how much I disapproved of her presence in your life last year, but now I couldn’t feel more different. Really.”
Gemma collapsed into the couch, sighing. “This is not how I expected you to react.”
“Well, sweetheart… I think I should tell you something.”
Gemma held her breath. There were a lot of things that Mira could tell her, many of which she wouldn’t want to hear. “What do you need to tell me?” she asked.
“I haven’t told anyone yet since it was only official last night, but,” Mira sighed, almost dreamily. “Hudson and I are getting married. He proposed.”
“What?” Gemma’s heart raced. For a moment, she forgot what the nature of their call was. “Aunt Mira, oh my God! What? I’m so happy for you. I’m so happy!”
“So, as you might put together, I’d like for you and Harper to get along. Since we’re all going to be family soon.”
“Oh,” Gemma exhaled. The purpose of the call suddenly came crashing down on her again. She paused. “Does Hudson know about my identity?”
Mira took in a deep breath before replying. “Yes. But he wouldn’t if I didn’t think it was totally secure. You know that right?”
Gemma ignored her aunt. “So does Harper know?”
“I don’t know. She and Hudson have gotten so close since she came back from rehab and I don’t to be in the way of their healing by making him keep these kinds of secrets,” she explained. “Well, the point is that I said he could tell her if it ever came up in conversation. But I wouldn’t worry.”
Gemma was floored. “How are you not worried?”
“Because even if she knew she wouldn’t tell a soul. I know I told you to be wary and I know that it’s my fault that you’re so worried, but we need to stay focused. Being careful doesn’t mean suspecting every person who comes your way. Paranoia is never productive.”
“Whoever it is – she was in my house, Aunt Mira. She got in somehow. Who knows what she knows about me? I haven’t been able to go back since it happened.”
“We’re paying quite a pretty penny for all the security detail, so I can assure you that you’re probably safer there than you are at Tyler’s. I guess this means you haven’t received the package.”
“What package?”
“Something came to the Beauford house for you and I forwarded it to your place. The return address is from Thailand.”
Gemma’s jaw dropped. “Lucas?” she breathed. She hadn’t thought of him in so long. Too long. “What did he send?”
“Well, I didn’t open it,” Mira said simply. “You would’ve yelled at me.”
~
Mira hadn’t been kidding about Queen Bee’s security detail. Nothing seemed different when Gemma first stepped out of the car in front of her own house, but then she watched Andro knock on the door of an unmarked van parked under some trees on her driveway. The door slid open to reveal a grid of television screens. Each covered a different corner of her house and true to Mira’s word, no entrance was left unmonitored. Two stern-looking men dressed head-to-toe in black sat inside. They gave Gemma a quick nod before returning to the screens.
“They can’t see into your bedroom though so don’t worry about your privacy,” Andro reassured her. Gemma laughed.
“Yeah, I’m only worried about my safety at this point, so that’s fine,” Gemma said. “Can you ask them if I received a package recently?” Andro tucked his head back into the van.
“You guys see a package arrive?”
One of the men nodded. “From a Lucas Grey. We scanned the contents and it’s safe.”
“They scanned it? What do they mean they scanned it?” Gemma asked.
“Mira pulled out all the stops. It’s the only way she can keep herself from coming here and watching the house herself,” Andro said. Gemma shook her head to herself. She should have known why Mira sounded so surprisingly relaxed.
“Andro, this is a weird question but how much is this all costing?”
“More than I’ll see in my lifetime,” Andro responded casually as he hoisted the package out of the van and led Gemma to the front door. “But don’t think about all that right now.”
“Alright,” Gemma sighed as she stepped into her house. The air held the same chill she felt the night she realized that the intruder had been inside. She frowned, shaking her head. “I’m just going to be honest and say that I’m only back because I was curious about the package and not because I actually want to be here. It still freaks me out to think some stranger was in here going through my stuff.”
“I understand,” Andro nodded. He handed her the package. The box was rather large but rectangular and flat. Scribbled directly onto the box was Gemma’s Beauford, New Jersey address. It was Lucas’s handwriting. She smiled. “There’s an envelope taped to the back,” Andro pointed out to her. Gemma brightened as she reached around to the back of the box. “I’m going to give you some time alone,” Andro said, backing away. “I’ll be right outside if you need me.”
“Okay,” Gemma replied as he shut the door. She tore the envelope off and opened it. Inside was a photo. It was a picture of Lucas standing next to a beautiful and rather majestic elephant. The elephant gripped a paintbrush in his trunk as Lucas held a canvas covered in painted flowers. Gemma squinted at the photo. She could barely recognize Lucas. He wore a crisp, white linen button-down shirt with his sleeves casually rolled up and the upper half of the buttons undone. His hair was its usual mess of brown hair but he was also sporting a fair amount of facial hair. If it weren’t for his familiar, shy smile, Gemma wasn’t sure she would have known who it was in the photo.
She turned the picture over. There was a note. Gemma, As promised, here I am with an eleph
ant. I know I was supposed to be riding it but apparently they don’t allow you to ride the ones that are super talented painters. But they did let me keep the painting. Love, Lucas. P.S. I think I saw Damian on a billboard in an ad with Queen Bee. Wow… what happened there?
Gemma burst out laughing. She didn’t realize the Thierry Marc ads made it all the way to Thailand but she was excited to find out through Lucas. She tore open the top of the box and pulled out all the packaging material to reveal the same painting that Lucas had held in the photograph. Gemma kneeled before it, looking at the careful little brushstrokes spattered across the canvas. She ran her fingers over the dried paint.
In most of her memories, Beauford was a place to be escaped. She was separated from her parents, from the city she knew, from the identity she craved. People like Madison and all those who couldn’t find it in themselves to stand up to her were like an army against Gemma’s wellbeing. Moving to Los Angeles and letting Queen Bee’s life be dominant felt like the necessary escape from the mundane existence of Gemma Hunter.
But as she continued to examine the painting, she began to feel something else. Generally reserved, Gemma had always lived in the shadow of her outgoing older brother. It never bothered her and at times, she loved the privacy of her own quiet nature. As a result, she grew up identifying herself simply as Gavin’s little sister until the day Mira discovered her very hidden talent for performing. The beginning of her teen years ended up being devoted entirely to Queen Bee.
What she often forgot about Beauford was its role in truly shaping who she was. Of course, she had begun her stint at Beauford High as Gavin’s little sister and lived secretly as Queen Bee, but somewhere between those two things, Gemma Hunter came into her own. There was more to her life than struggling with bullies like Madison and powering through classes, exams and hectic schedules. There were people like Lucas who remembered every little detail about her and effortlessly made her feel more special than any superstar alter ego she may have. There were people like Damian who loved her unconditionally and supported her when she herself thought she wasn’t worth it.
Though they were both now acquainted with Queen Bee, they had both known her first as Gemma Hunter. In fact, it was possible they knew Gemma better than she knew herself. She could hardly understand the point of keeping her true identity a secret when she had been losing touch with her true self without high school keeping her planted. Right now, Gemma Hunter was nothing more than a name.
Hot tears brimmed in Gemma’s eyes. She wanted to call Mira again but she knew she would only worry her with all the current thoughts in her head. She wanted to call her parents but she barely knew how to speak to them anymore. She wanted to call Tyler but she knew he could never truly understand. And Lucas was so far away. It was nearly midnight where he was but she didn’t know how to call him even if she could. Gemma instead picked up her phone and dialed the next best number.
“Hello?” Damian answered, his voice sounded groggy.
“Did I wake you?” Gemma asked. Her voice quivered and she knew immediately he could tell she was crying. He always knew.
“It’s fine. Are you okay? What’s wrong?”
“I just need to see you,” she cried.
“I’m in Oakland. Where are you?”
“Home. My home. Gemma’s home not Queen Bee’s fake home, not Tyler’s place. Mine,” she sobbed. She couldn’t stop herself now.
“Okay. Okay, calm down. I’ll be on the next plane down.”
~
“Thank you,” Gemma sighed as she threw herself into Damian’s arms. “Thank you for coming.” He pulled her into his warm body, smoothing back her hair.
“I was frisked before they let me in,” Damian said, narrowing his eyes at Andro as he walked into the foyer.
“Oh yeah, I’m sorry. This place is like, on lockdown,” Gemma laughed through her tears. “I can’t believe how soon you got here.”
Damian laughed. “Me neither. I actually drove to the airport first, bought my tickets at a red light, then got on the plane. I need to get back by midnight though because I have a home game tomorrow.”
“I’m sorry for making you come down here.”
“You didn’t,” Damian smiled. He kissed her gently on the forehead. “I wanted to come. Now talk to me.”
Gemma smiled through pursed lips. The moment she opened them, she knew there would be no going back on her words. “I just feel… like I don’t know who I am anymore. I don’t know who my friends are and I don’t know why I’m doing anything I’m doing. It just feels like I’m wasting everyone’s time and money and energy on something that makes no sense to me anymore,” she buried her face in Damian’s chest. He lowered his hands from her back to her waist. She felt him lower his face into her hair.
“It’s nice to see you out of costume,” he murmured. “I feel like I haven’t really seen you since that night at the cevicheria.”
“That’s exactly what I’m talking about,” she breathed. “All I feel like these days is just some shell of Queen Bee. An insecure one, too. Not even the mess I was as Gemma Hunter juggling Queen Bee’s life. Now it’s just a hollow version of everything I ever was. I just want a second of feeling like the real me with nothing in the way. No disguises, no bodyguards, no security detail, no frisking my friends before they come through the door.” Damian laughed. Gemma smiled, running her hands down his arms.
“It’s okay,” he said, kissing her on the top of her head. “It makes me happy because I know people are taking the right measures to keep you safe. Besides, getting to see you in here, the real you… feeling your hands again, without the wigs, without the costumes and all the people… it makes it okay that I was felt up by some random guy, I guess.”
Gemma laughed heartily – a real laugh. “Okay, good,” she smiled. She tilted her head up to look at him. He smiled softly at her, leaning his forehead against hers. She could feel his heart beating peacefully against her hand.
“Damn. I can’t remember the last time I felt this relaxed,” he said quietly.
“Neither can I.” Gemma clasped her fingers behind Damian’s neck. His strong grip was somehow also gentle around her waist as they swayed to the silence. She closed her eyes, remembering prom night – the night Damian told her he had chosen to go to UCLA. They were dancing to Tyler’s song. It was the one he had written about his first encounter with her at her Los Angeles concert, wondering if their paths would ever cross again. Back then, in that moment, she had wondered how she would live without Damian in her life. Gemma couldn’t believe how much their lives had changed in the years since that day. Both Tyler and Damian were in her life once again and she was living in the city that she had once only known as the place where the mishap with Tyler had happened.
“What’s going on in here?”
The voice that interrupted them belonged to Tyler. Damian and Gemma both snapped their heads towards the entrance of the room, dropping their hands from each other’s bodies.
Gemma blinked. “What are you doing here?”
“You weren’t at my place and I got worried so I came here.”
“Tyler, I’m fine,” Gemma said, walking towards him. To her surprise, Tyler grabbed her by the shoulders, stopping her. He looked over her to glare at Damian.
“What are you trying here?” he demanded.
Damian released a breath, his hands in his pockets. “Easy, Tyler. There’s nothing going on.”
“Really?” Tyler seethed, approaching Damian with a surprisingly threatening demeanor. “Then what are you doing in L.A. with your hands all over my girlfriend?”
“It’s not what it looks like, Tyler,” Gemma said, grabbing Tyler’s hands with her own. She couldn’t believe that she actually had to speak those clichéd words. “Really. I just missed home all of a sudden and Damian was the closest thing I had to it.”
“So you called him here?” he turned to her, the rage in his eyes now tinged with hurt. He averted his gaze only to catch sight
of the painting and photograph of Lucas on the ground. He laughed bitterly. “You’ve got to be kidding me, Gemma.”
“Tyler, there is nothing going on here, you have to believe me,” Gemma pleaded. Tyler turned his focus once again on Damian.
“Get out of here,” he said. “Get the hell out!” He started towards him again, but Gemma restrained him. Damian only turned to Gemma, lifting his eyebrows.
“Everything will be fine. We’ll talk more later,” she said in her most reassuring tone. She wanted to thank him more for all he had done for her, for flying over on a moment’s notice, but she could only imagine how Tyler would perceive it. Damian simply nodded and left without another word. Gemma closed the door, collapsing into it. She leaned her forehead against the cold, heavy wood and sighed, bracing herself for Tyler’s words.
“Are you trying to humiliate me? Parading your ex-boyfriends around in this house when you told me you were too scared to be here? What, am I not enough for you?” Tyler asked. “Do you not feel safe enough around me?” She couldn’t bear to look at him but she could hear the despair in his voice.
“You know I would never do any of those things,” Gemma whispered. She felt ashamed though she couldn’t pinpoint why.
“Actually, I don’t know,” Tyler said. “When you and I first started seeing each other, you were still dating Lucas.”
Gemma’s jaw dropped and she turned to face him. Her face burned with more anger than embarrassment. “That was not what that was, Tyler. I know how it came off and I know I did something wrong but it’s not like that at all. Don’t you think I would’ve learned from all my stupid mistakes?”
“What would you think if you walked into my house and saw me holding Desiree like that?” Tyler demanded. “How would that make you feel, Gemma?” His words forced her to simply stand, speechless and unmoving. Her lips parted to respond but she couldn’t. She had never thought of it in such a way.
