“Please forgive me.” Forgive me for not being woman enough for you. Forgive me for not having the courage to reach out and take what I want and not care what my friends think. And forgive me for being so afraid.
She ran from him, rushing up the steps and not looking back. Once upstairs, she nodded to the workmen who spoke to her as she hurried out of the studio and into the icy slush. She didn’t realize she still wore Rick’s jacket until she was inside the Sparkle and Shine shop.
“Well, my goodness gracious. From the looks of you, I’d say Rick’s discovery in the basement was a rather exciting experience for you.” Birdie gazed at her niece with knowing green eyes, a gleeful grin on her face. “Or perhaps taking a look at the old speakeasy bar has nothing to do with that sexual flush on your cheeks.”
“Don’t you dare start in with me, Birdie Pierpont!” Lori Lee ripped off Rick’s jacket and threw it at her aunt. Birdie caught it before it hit the floor. “Give that to Mr. Warrick, if he bothers to come after it.” Lori Lee stormed into the back storage room and slammed the door.
Alone, Lori Lee slumped down into a chair at her work desk, covered her face with her hands and cried silently. What had happened today in the studio basement could never happen again. If it did, she wasn’t sure she’d have the strength to walk away, and something told her that next time Rick wouldn’t call a halt to their lovemaking.
Four
Lori Lee hadn’t spoken to Rick since their passionate encounter in the basement, and she’d seen him only at a distance. Although Rick’s sister brought Darcie to practice and often picked her up, Rick had managed to pick up his daughter twice. And he’d been late both times. Since he worked from eight till five, there was no reason he couldn’t get to the studio by six-thirty, right after Darcie’s class ended. What did he do during that hour and a half that delayed him?
Lori Lee had told herself she didn’t care what Rick did and with whom he did it. She was not going to get involved with a man who could mean nothing but trouble for her. He might claim to be trying to reform, but Lori Lee doubted his ability to change. Of course, whether or not Rick was a new man really didn’t matter. She was the same woman who had miscarried three babies and been told she could never have a child of her own.
In the weeks since meeting Darcie Warrick, Lori Lee had guarded her emotions, knowing how easy it would be for her to love Rick’s little girl. “My name’s Darcie Lee,” the child had informed her. “We’ve got the same middle name, don’t we?”
She had wondered if Rick had named his daughter after her. Was it truly possible that he’d cared about her all these years? She certainly hadn’t been able to forget him. When her marriage had begun to fall apart, she had thought more and more about Rick, often fantasizing that he was the one making love to her instead of Tory.
“Hey, girl, where’d you go off to?” Deanie Webber punched Lori Lee on the arm.
Gasping, Lori Lee came out of her private thoughts and smiled sadly. “Just thinking about Darcie.”
“Look, I’ll be glad to take her home since Rick’s running a little late,” Deanie said. “It’s not much out of my way.”
“No, that won’t be necessary. I’m sure Rick will be here soon. He’s usually late.”
“Maybe he runs late on purpose so he can talk to you for a few minutes without so many twirler mothers hanging around undressing him with their eyes.”
Lori Lee chuckled. “You and Aunt Birdie have a knack for cutting to the chase and saying just what you think.” She sighed. “But you’re wrong about Rick’s reason for being late. He doesn’t come in and talk to me. He meets Darcie outside.”
“So what happened to scare him off?” Deanie asked. “What did you do, lie to him and tell him you weren’t interested?”
“I’m not interested.” Lori Lee crossed her arms over her chest.
“Yeah, sure. And I don’t cheat on my diet. Get real. This is Deanie you’re talking to.”
“Rick and I agreed that we aren’t suitable.” Lori Lee lowered her voice to a soft murmur when Darcie and Katie Webber came bounding down the stairs.
“Look at us, Lori Lee,” Katie said. “I’ve been practicing our Twinkle Toes dance routine with Darcie just like you asked me to do.”
“We’ll discuss this later,” Deanie whispered to Lori Lee, then turned her attention toward the two six-year-olds in hot-pink tights and black leotards who were eagerly waiting to perform. “Go ahead, girls. Show us your routine.”
“You won’t believe how good Darcie is,” Katie said. “She’s going to do great when we go to Clanton.”
“Well, let’s see what you two can do.” Lori Lee focused her attention on Rick’s daughter, on the adorable blue-eyed blonde who seemed to worship her. The child obviously needed and wanted a mother, and for some reason she had chosen Lori Lee. Perhaps it was because so many people had commented about the striking resemblance between the two of them. And more than one twirler mother had commented on how talented Darcie was, having taken lessons only a month and already upstaging some of the more seasoned students.
Watching Darcie and Katie perform the dance she had choreographed to the song “Singing in the Rain,” from the old MGM Gene Kelly movie, Lori Lee smiled proudly at how well the two girls did the number. People were right. Darcie Warrick possessed a natural talent for dancing, twirling and showmanship, the way Lori Lee always had.
A feeling like none she’d ever known swirled up inside of Lori Lee, clutching her heart, misting her eyes with tears and taunting her with irrational thoughts. This Little girl—Rick’s daughter—is mine. For some reason fate had played a horrible trick on her by giving the child that was meant to be hers to another woman.
Deanie’s loud clapping brought Lori Lee quickly back to reality. She applauded with great enthusiasm, then rushed over and hugged both girls. Darcie clung to her, hugging her fiercely, as if she never wanted to let her go.
“Y’all were wonderful,” Lori Lee told them.
Katie ran to Deanie, who kissed her child’s cheek. “I swear, you are the best little girl in the whole world. You got my looks and your dad’s brains.” Katie giggled at her mother’s playfully loving comments.
As Lori Lee stood, Darcie grabbed her hand and gazed up at her with a pleading look that asked for recognition.
Dear God! Lori Lee closed her eyes, blinking back the tears as she fought and gained control of her emotions. Her instincts told her to claim this child, to give Darcie Warrick exactly what she wanted—a mother. But she couldn’t do that. It would be wrong. Wrong for Darcie. And wrong for her.
Lori Lee cupped Darcie’s chin with her hand. “Your father will be so proud of you, sweetheart. When he picks you up today, I’m going to ask him if you can perform the Halftime Show Dance Line routine with our Twinkle Toes group when we go to Clanton.”
Darcie jumped up and down. Katie followed suit. Within minutes both girls were clapping their hands and squealing with childish glee.
“Am I really that good, Lori Lee?” Darcie asked.
“You’re really that good,” Lori Lee said. “And if you continue to practice, I have no doubt you’ll be ready to move into Twinkle Toes and compete in all their events by the end of summer.”
“Well, I hate to leave when we’re having such a good time,” Deanie said. “But Phil will be home soon and he’s taking us out for dinner.” Deanie lifted her child’s coat off the rack and held it out for her. “Come on, Katie. We’ve got to go.” Deanie glanced at her watch, then at Lori Lee. “It’s ten till seven. Are you sure you don’t want me to drop Darcie by Eve’s?”
“No, thanks. If Rick isn’t here soon, I’ll take Darcie home myself.”
“Good idea.” Deanie winked mischievously at Lori Lee as she helped Katie into her coat. “I’ll expect a full report.”
“There will be nothing to report,” Lori Lee called after Deanie as she and Katie waved goodbye.
Darcie tugged on Lori Lee’s hand. “I’m sorry my daddy�
�s late. Sometimes he takes a nap after he gets home from work. He works very hard and gets tired.”
Lori Lee nodded as if she understood, but in truth, she was upset that Rick could be so irresponsible. Other parents, some also single, managed to pick up their children on time. Why couldn’t he?
“Do you know if your Aunt Eve is home?” Lori Lee asked.
“Aunt Eve’s probably at her ceramic class right now, and Uncle Tommy’s baby-sitting,” Darcie said. “That means tonight is hamburger night and Uncle Tommy’s cooking. I like his hamburgers, but they’re not as good as my daddy’s.”
“Well, it looks like something has delayed your father.” Lori Lee removed Darcie’s coat and her own from the wall rack. “I’ll run you home. I want to talk to your father.”
Lori Lee helped Darcie into her coat, then slipped into her own. She retrieved her shoulder bag from the desk, turned off the lights and opened the front door.
Once they were settled inside Lori Lee’s white Buick Riviera, Darcie said, “My daddy’s not married, you know.”
“Yes, I know.” Lori Lee inserted the key in the ignition and started the car.
“He dates. Aunt Eve’s been trying to find him a wife, but he hasn’t dated anybody we want to keep.”
Lori Lee smiled despite her best efforts not to. “Is that right?”
“Yeah. Aunt Eve says that Daddy’s too hard to please. But he told her that he wasn’t going to marry just anybody. He wants to find somebody special that we’ll both love.”
“I’m sure your father will find the right woman one of these days.” Lori Lee couldn’t believe she was actually discussing Rick’s love life with his six-year-old daughter.
“You aren’t married are you, Lori Lee?” Darcie asked.
Lori Lee knew where this conversation was headed if she didn’t steer it in another direction. “No, I’m not married, but I already have several boyfriends.”
“Wouldn’t you like to have one more?”
Lori Lee was both touched and amused by Darcie’s matchmaking scheme. Heaven help her and Rick if the child ever joined forces with Aunt Birdie.
“I don’t know how I’d make time for another boyfriend,” Lori Lee said, trying desperately to keep a straight face.
“Couldn’t you get rid of one of your other boyfriends and make room for somebody new?”
“Look, we’re here already.” Lori Lee pulled her Riviera into Eve Nelson’s double driveway. Rick’s sister’s house was on East Sixth Street, just a few minutes’ drive from downtown. Glad for an excuse not to have to answer Darcie’s question, Lori Lee unbuckled her seat belt, then reached over and undid Darcie’s.
“I’ll go tell Uncle Tommy I’m home, while you go up to our apartment and talk to Daddy. You can tell him I’ll fix him a hamburger and have it ready for him.” Darcie opened the car door, then glanced back at Lori Lee. “I’m sure it would be all right if you wanted to stay and eat with us.”
“Oh. Well, it’s awfully nice of you to invite me, but I’m afraid I can’t stay. Not tonight.”
“Sometime soon, maybe?”
“Maybe.”
“I’ll get Aunt Eve to call you.” Before Lori Lee could respond, Darcie jumped out of the car and dashed into the house. Lori Lee got out, walked straight up the driveway to the garage apartment and climbed the steps. Backyard floodlights illuminated the Nelsons’ yard and house, as well as the large detached garage and upstairs apartment.
Lori Lee had wondered if she’d find Rick at home. His old GMC pickup truck was parked in the garage below, so she assumed he was here.
She knocked on the front door. No answer. She knocked again. Harder. Louder. Still no reply. She tried the doorknob, and to her surprise the door opened. Easing inside, she glanced around at the small, rather dismal room. A compact stove, refrigerator, sink and several cabinets lined the pale green right wall. The furnishings were sparse. There was a card table and four folding chairs near the kitchen alcove, and a well-worn, olive green sofa and matching rocker in the living room area. Two mismatched lamps, both burning brightly, sat atop a couple of old pine end tables. Miniblinds covered the windows.
“Rick?” she called out to him. “Where are you?”
There were three doors from which to choose. One was partially open and she could tell it was a tiny bathroom. Another was to her left and the final one straight in front of her. She picked the door in front of her, opening it to discover a small bedroom painted a pale shade of blue and decorated with a tiny floral print perfect for a little girl. Eve Nelson must have put together the precious room for her niece.
“Rick! Are you here? I brought Darcie home.”
Turning to the left, she opened the third door and found a dark place not much larger than the bathroom. The light from the living room cast wavy gray shadows into the area. A bed without a headboard had been pushed up against the wall and took up most of the floor space. Rick Warrick, still wearing his navy blue work coveralls, lay sprawled out across the bed, snoring loudly.
What was wrong with him? Was he sick? Drunk? She leaned over, called his name and shook him gently. He grabbed her wrist and hauled her down on top of him. Lori Lee cried out, partly in surprise and partly in fear. The man lying beneath her was big and hard and very strong. Her heartbeat accelerated at a maddening speed.
He blinked his eyes several times and stared up into her face. “Lori Lee?” His voice was deep and groggy. He closed his eyes. “Dreaming,” he whispered the word against her lips.
She trembled. “Rick. You’re not dreaming. Wake up.”
He bound her tightly to him, caressing her hip and thigh. She moaned softly, her body instinctively softening into his.
His eyes flew open. He shot straight up into a sitting position, almost knocking Lori Lee off the bed. Grabbing her around the waist, he pulled her onto his lap.
“What the hell are you doing here?” He growled the question.
As always, he badly needed a shave and a haircut. And as always, he looked incredibly handsome and sexy. “I brought Darcie home. It’s seven o’clock. You forgot to pick her up at the studio.”
“Oh, God, Lori Lee, I’m sorry. I set my alarm, but the damned thing didn’t go off.”
She jumped up, placed her hands on her hips and glared at Rick. “We need to talk.”
He grabbed the clock, shook it and groaned. “I’ll have to get some new batteries.” Standing, he rubbed his bristly chin and yawned. “Where’s Darcie?”
“She’s fixing you a hamburger over at your sister’s house,” Lori Lee said, backing away from him. “I understand this is Uncle Tommy’s night to cook.”
“Yeah, Tommy’s great with kids. His two and Darcie. I don’t know what I’d do without his and Eve’s help.” Rick moved toward her, backing her against the wall. “It isn’t easy raising a kid alone.”
“Other people seem to manage.” Lori Lee shoved against Rick’s chest, but he didn’t budge. “You’re always late picking her up and today is a prime example of what an irresponsible father you are. Why do you need a nap in the afternoon? It wouldn’t be because you’re out carousing around all night, would it? From what Darcie has said, I get the idea she spends several nights a week at her Aunt Eve’s.”
When Rick backed away from Lori Lee, she escaped into the living room. Standing in the doorway, Rick snorted and shook his head. His accusing stare bored into her.
“You’ve condemned me without a trial, haven’t you, honey? Once an irresponsible hell-raiser, always an irresponsible hell-raiser. Is that the way you see it?”
“Am I wrong?” Gripping her leather shoulder bag, she glared at him.
“How could you possibly be wrong about anything? You’re Lori Lee Guy.”
“I can’t understand why you’d leave that precious child to go out tomcatting around at night when you could be at home with her. If she were mine—”
“But she’s not yours,” Rick said. “She’s mine, and for your information—” He stopped
talking midsentence. “No, you go ahead and think what you want to think, believe what you want to believe.”
“I wanted to believe, for Darcie’s sake, that you’d changed.”
He took a step toward her. She backed away. He continued walking toward her until he forced her into the open doorway leading to the small wooden stoop at the top of the stairs.
“You want to think I’m still the town bad boy who isn’t worthy to kiss your feet.” Rick grasped Lori Lee’s shoulders, his big fingers biting into her tender flesh. “You’re looking for a reason not to like me, to think the worst of me. It makes it easier to reject me if you can convince yourself that I’m not a decent person.”
“That’s not true.” Lori Lee realized he was going to kiss her and knew she was powerless to stop him.
The kiss was fast, forceful and almost brutal. A kiss of anger as much as of passion. She felt the powerful effect from her spinning head to her weak knees.
Releasing her, Rick stepped back into his apartment. The light from inside the living room silhouetted his big body. Lori Lee looked at him, uncertainty and longing waging a war inside her. Uncertainty won. She turned and fled, running down the stairs and out to her car.
Lori Lee curled up on the sofa and sipped the cinnamon spice tea she’d poured into one of her good china cups. Tyke lay at her side, snoring. She ran her hand over his little head and down his neck. He grunted, turned over on his back, his feet in the air, and continued sleeping.
Lori Lee laughed, envying her dog’s easy life. “You’ve got it made, buddy boy, and you don’t even know it.”
When she’d come home tonight, she had taken a long bubble bath, eaten a light salad, then put on a classical music CD. Whenever she felt especially lonely or sad, she treated herself to little creature comforts she found so consoling.
Her encounter with Rick had been more than unpleasant; it had been frightening. Not that she thought Rick would harm her physically. No, she knew he wasn’t that type of man. But his ability to harm her emotionally could not be dismissed lightly. Her foolish attraction to him posed a threat not only to her sanity, but to her safe, secure, orderly life. She’d be a fool to trust him. She doubted he’d ever been faithful to a woman in his entire life.
A Child of Her Own Page 6
