“By what, Dad? By a gay man?”
His father didn’t respond.
“And actually, Cassie’s the one who insisted I raise Liam should she not be able to. We discussed it at length back when I was the one taking care of my sister because you and everybody else had abandoned her.” Roan tried to keep his voice level, but it was getting more difficult as the rage shifted and grew inside him.
“You and I both know Cassie wouldn’t want this for Liam.”
That was his father’s retort? Seriously.
Roan didn’t know anything of the sort. Not to mention, his father didn’t know the first fucking thing about what Cassie had wanted. He hadn’t bothered to be there for her.
Not that any of that mattered anymore. Roan was raising Liam, and no one could do a damn thing to change that. He wouldn’t allow it to happen.
Roan found Cam and Gannon staring back at him, concern glittering in their eyes.
“I have to go.”
Without waiting for more nonsense to spew from his father’s mouth, Roan hung up the phone.
“What did he say?” Cam questioned, his eyes soft.
Roan took a deep breath. “Thanks to all this bullshit, it looks as though he wants to fight me for custody of Liam.” Even as the words came out of his mouth, a red haze filled Roan’s vision. “And this is all Seg’s fucking fault!”
Cam moved toward him quickly. “Relax. You can’t take this all out on him.”
“No?” Roan snapped his mouth shut when the word came out as a roar and scared Liam.
The little boy’s chin quivered, and Roan was instantly lifting him out of his swing. “I’m sorry, little man,” he whispered, hugging Liam tightly to him. “It’s all good.”
And it would be. No way would he let his father win this battle. Roan would give up everything in this world for Liam. Everything.
Including the only man he’d ever actually loved.
IT TOOK SOME TIME TO get going the following morning.
Seg had been hard-pressed to get out of bed, not wanting to let go of the dream he’d had. It had been about Roan and Liam. The three of them had lived happily ever after.
Or as happily ever after as they could, considering all the shit going on around them. In his dream, Roan had forgiven him completely, agreed to marry him, then allowed him to adopt Liam. They’d moved into Seg’s house, his mother had come down for the wedding, and they were gearing up for the honeymoon.
Seg wished like hell it hadn’t been a dream.
Because he knew life didn’t stop for wishes, Seg had forced himself out of bed and stumbled to the shower, life coming front and center. Life being that he had to face his teammates this morning while being completely uncertain how they were going to react to the shit storm Seg had created.
After he took a shower and downed a protein bar, Seg went to practice like he always did. He kept a smile plastered on his face despite the nervous tension coursing through his body. He was damn glad he and Roan had managed to somewhat fix things last night, because having to worry about that along with how his teammates would react to him would’ve been too much.
“What’s up, Seg?” Rush smacked him on the back when they passed in the locker room. “You ready to kick some serious ass tonight?”
Seg offered a chin nod and a smirk. He was ready, all right.
“Yo! Seg!”
He turned to see Patrick Benne staring over at him from where he was lacing up his skates.
“You ready to dish out a little payback? We owe these guys an ass whoopin’ tonight.”
Well, there you go.
No one seemed to give two shits about the fact that Seg had announced to the world that he was gay. That or they were pretending it hadn’t happened. Surely they weren’t oblivious to the fact that there’d been a handful of news crews in the parking lot. If he had to guess, they’d been asking his teammates what they thought of the gay man they had to work with day in and day out.
Either way, Seg would take it. He didn’t want things to be weird. He was ready to move forward, to put the past behind him and find a way to pave the road for his future. His future being playing hockey and working things out with Roan. Those were the only two things on his mind right now.
Taking a seat on the bench near his locker, Seg toed off his shoes. He looked up to see Mattias Valeri watching him closely. He cocked an eyebrow in question, but Mattias turned away, grabbed his bag, and disappeared.
Okay, so not everyone could be happy about the news.
Seg glanced around the room.
Kaufman was standing in the corner talking to Evans, the rookie defenseman. Rush was sharing a couple of pointers with Locke, who was likely going to be in goal tonight. Benne was chatting on the phone, grinning like a fool. Coach was chatting it up with Cullen Crosby, the defenseman Seg was currently paired with.
No one was paying any attention to him.
Taking a deep breath, Seg decided to go forward as though nothing had happened. In truth, nothing had happened, other than his secret was now out. But that didn’t make him a different man. He was the same guy who’d come into this locker room hundreds of times before. He needed to focus on morning skate and get his mind in the right place for tonight’s game. He didn’t have time to second-guess himself, or anyone else, for that matter.
An hour before the game, Seg took a minute to call Roan. He hadn’t heard from him all day, and he’d tried to call twice. Once after morning skate and once before he headed back to the arena. There was a weird tingling sensation on the back of his neck, and he got the feeling something was wrong.
Roan didn’t answer, so Seg left a message. “Hey. Wanted to see how you are. Check on Liam. The game starts in a bit, but I’ll call you after. I’d like to see you tonight if that’s possible. We head out on the road tomorrow and I won’t be back until Sunday. That’s too long to go without seeing you.” He took a deep breath. “All right. Well, I guess I’ll talk to you in a bit.”
Seg hung up the phone, staring down at the screen for a couple of minutes. His mind drifted back to last night. He tried to recall whether he’d missed something. He and Roan had made love. Twice. The only reason Seg had willingly gone home was because Roan had needed to get back to Liam. He didn’t remember anything being wrong.
Well, nothing more than all the shit they’d been dealing with. But he could’ve sworn Roan had forgiven him. Or at least was beginning to.
Shit.
“All right, guys,” Kaufman called out. “Let’s have a chat before we head out there and kick some ass.”
The other guys standing around roared their agreement while Seg tossed his phone into his bag. He’d have to worry about Roan later, because right now, he had a job to do. And no way was he going to let these guys down. He damn sure didn’t need to give them a reason to be pissed at him.
After all, he’d given everyone enough reason already.
Twenty-Eight
A KNOCK SOUNDED ON THE glass door of the office.
Sitting in his chair behind the counter, Roan lifted his head to peer over. The room was completely dark because he hadn’t bothered to turn on the lights. Since it was a few minutes shy of midnight and the office was closed, he hadn’t wanted to alert anyone that he was there.
Cam and Gannon were the only people who knew where Roan was. He’d spent the better part of the day dodging reporters, trying to pretend life was normal for him. It wasn’t. Not by a long shot.
What normal person had reporters camped out to get dirt about his relationship? What normal person’s father and stepmother wanted to destroy his life because of said relationship? What normal person was worried that the man they loved was scared shitless about who he was and resolved that fear by perching a woman on his lap?
“What a fucking mess,” he murmured into the darkness.
Whoever was at the door could turn around and go the other way.
The only reason Roan was here was because he needed a little time t
o himself. It was the very reason he’d borrowed Gannon’s car in an effort to throw off the reporters and headed straight for the marina after feeding Liam and putting him down for the night. He’d been grateful that Cam had offered to come over to Roan’s house. As far as he was concerned, it was where Liam needed to be. At home in his own bed. Should he wake up, Cam and Gannon would be there.
He forced himself to be content with that for a little while. The buzzing in his head wouldn’t stop, and he simply needed a few minutes to think.
By not going out in public, Roan avoided the hassle of the news crews, plus reduced the risk of seeing Seg. He’d received the man’s voice mails, both before tonight’s game and then after. When Seg insisted on coming by to talk, Roan had known he needed to find a place to go so Seg couldn’t find him.
Maybe Hudson or Teague had heard him come in and they were coming to check.
Another knock sounded.
Shit.
Either Hudson or Teague forgot their key upstairs or it wasn’t either of them.
Roan prayed they’d forgotten the key because the alternative…
Knock. Knock. Knock.
“Fuck.”
Getting to his feet, Roan ambled over to the silhouette of a man standing on the other side of the glass door. He twisted the deadbolt and pushed it open.
It damn sure wasn’t Hudson or Teague standing there.
Son of a bitch.
Anger and sorrow twisted his gut. His first instinct was to rail at Seg, to make him go away, leave him in peace.
“Hey,” Seg greeted.
“I don’t want you here,” Roan told him, meeting his gaze at the same time a lump of emotion formed in his throat.
“Please don’t make me leave,” Seg said softly, halting Roan’s protest.
For whatever reason, seeing Seg, all the emotions moving over his attractive features, was more than Roan could handle. All the feelings—anger, sadness, hurt, love—warring inside him blended into a storm of epic proportions.
“Why are you here?” he choked out, trying to hold himself together. He’d managed all damn day; he couldn’t afford to fall apart now.
“Because I’m not going to let you push me away. Not this time.” The determination in his tone belied the concern etched on his face.
Roan stared at Seg, taking in the dark shadows on his face, trying to peer into his eyes, to find the comfort he needed, because he was quickly falling apart.
“Roan…”
The next thing he knew, Roan was sobbing, Seg’s arms coming around him and holding him tight.
This was all too much. Every damn bit of it.
Liam.
Seg.
His father.
The stupid fucking reporters.
Roan didn’t want to fight his parents for custody, and he shouldn’t have to. If Seg hadn’t pulled his stunt, none of this would be happening. But damn it all to hell, Roan would do what needed to be done in order to protect his son. He wanted Liam in his life, wanted to raise him. So what if he was fucking gay; it didn’t mean he didn’t love that boy with all that he was.
Seg’s hand cradled the back of Roan’s head, warm, strong, comforting. He didn’t ask questions, didn’t offer any meaningless words of comfort. He merely held him, and Roan needed that right then. He needed the physical security, something to hold him together while he let it all out.
Several minutes passed before he managed to compose himself. Pushing away from the warm man offering him solace, Roan looked up at Seg’s face, backlit by the light from the parking lot.
“Cam called you.” It wasn’t a question.
Seg touched his forehead, then brushed one blond eyebrow down with his fingers. That was a tell of his, Roan had noticed. It didn’t necessarily mean he was lying, but it did mean he was uncomfortable about something. Which likely meant that Cam had called him and he’d also asked Seg not to say anything about it.
He would have to have a conversation with Cam later.
“How’re you holding up?”
Roan wasn’t sure how to answer that question, so he shrugged. He wanted to ask Seg why he was there, but his answer really didn’t matter. Roan wasn’t sure how he felt about it yet, but he’d been an asshole long enough. Right now, he simply needed to process what was going on in his life and not focus on the shit that didn’t matter.
Not that Seg didn’t matter. He was a … Roan was going to say friend, but that was bullshit. Seg was everything. He’d long ago fallen in love with the guy even if he was too stupid to accept it. No matter how hard he tried, Roan couldn’t completely write him out of his life, but right now, he didn’t know what to do with the giant blond staring back at him. He wanted to ask Seg to hold him some more, to turn back time and erase everything that had taken place in the last couple of weeks.
But no matter what, Seg couldn’t hold him because Roan needed time to himself, time to process what his next steps were. He knew Seg wanted to work things out, and maybe that was a possibility, but Roan wouldn’t know that for sure until he could wrap his head around all the shit going on.
“Knock, knock.”
Roan peered around Seg to see Teague peeking in the small gap in the door where he held it open.
“Shit,” Roan grumbled. “Did I wake you up?”
“No. I’m not an old fucker like you. I don’t have dinner and fall asleep after,” Teague assured him with a smirk as he stepped inside. His expression sobered. “Hudson and I were watching TV. I heard the door chime a second time and wanted to check on you.” Teague glanced over at Seg. “Looks like that’s already being taken care of.”
“Yeah.” Roan didn’t look at Seg. “Thanks. I’m just gonna hang here for a while. Cam and Gannon are watching Liam.”
Teague frowned. “I heard about your stepmother, man. I’m really sorry she’s pulling this shit. If you ask me, he’s better off with you anyway. He’s happy. That’s what matters.”
Roan nodded. He briefly wondered how Teague had heard, but he didn’t ask. It didn’t matter anymore. “Thanks. That means a lot.”
Teague rolled his eyes. “Whatever, man. You might not believe me, but it’s true. I’m not blowin’ smoke up your ass. But anyway. You do what you gotta do.” Teague cast a quick look at Seg. “You stay with him. Keep him from thinkin’ too much.”
Before Roan could protest, Seg’s hand came down on his shoulder, giving him a gentle squeeze. It was a silent reassurance that doing what Teague said was the right thing to do.
“Thanks, Teague … for everything.”
“Anytime. Let us know if you need anything.”
Roan hoped he wouldn’t have to ask for help. He wasn’t big on leaning on other people or relying on them. However, he was starting to think it might be time to. If nothing else, he needed to know he had people behind him, people who believed in him.
Because no matter what, Roan wasn’t letting anyone take Liam from him. He would give up everything else before he allowed that to happen.
JUST WHEN HE THOUGHT THINGS were starting to look up…
Seg had realized after the game that Roan was ignoring him. Rather than blowing up the man’s phone, Seg had hopped in the Range Rover and headed right for Roan’s house only to find no one was home. He’d remembered Roan telling him that Cam and Gannon lived somewhere close to the marina, so he’d headed that direction while searching for Cam’s phone number.
He hadn’t been driving long when his phone rang. At first he’d thought it was Roan, but he’d been shocked as shit when Cam introduced himself on the other end of the line.
“Hey, man,” Cam greeted, his tone low, serious. “I’m probably breaking some sort of bro code by calling you, but I wanted you to know.”
“Know what?” Seg didn’t like where this was headed already.
“Roan’s … well, the most accurate way to describe it is falling apart. He had a fight with his father earlier and he’s out of sorts. He just left with Liam, heading back to his place.
Gannon and I are gonna go watch the baby so Roan can get out of the house for a bit.”
“Where’s he going?” Seg would track him down one way or the other.
“The marina. He does that sometimes. Goes there to think.”
“Thanks.”
“Give him a bit, and do me a favor, man?”
“Anything.”
“Don’t tell him I called. He doesn’t like when I get all up in his shit, but … as much as he’s hurting right now, he needs you. And the two of you need to work this out.” Cam chuckled roughly. “Damn, now I sound like a fucking shrink.”
Half an hour later, Seg was en route to the marina. And here he was.
Seg moved back as Roan shut and locked the door behind the guy who’d come by. He hadn’t met the guy other than the one time at the arena so long ago, and he’d heard enough from Roan to know he was one of the business partners who lived above the marina. Seg wasn’t great at memorizing faces and names, so he’d only caught on when Roan said his name.
Not that it mattered.
“You really shouldn’t be here,” Roan said when he turned to face him.
Seg knew he needed to defuse this situation and fast. Cam had given him some of the details of what happened today. The guy had filled him in on how Roan’s father and stepmother were up in arms about the shit going on with Seg and they’d found the leverage they needed to fight for custody of Liam.
Or so they thought.
No way were they going to get away with it. For one, Seg had more than enough money to fight these people. And he’d do it for Roan. He’d do anything for Roan and Liam.
“We need to talk,” Seg said, halting Roan from sending him on his way.
“There’s nothing to talk about, Seg. I’ve got too much shit on my plate to deal with this right now.” Roan ran his hand over his face. “I need time to myself. Time to think. I can’t do that with you around.”
“Shit.” Seg turned and stalked across the room. He’d known this was coming, but he wasn’t about to let Roan shove him right back out the door.
Harmless (Pier 70 Book 4) Page 24
